Chapter Five
Finn’s head might have actually exploded if Lorcan hadn’t risen, too, and cupped the back of Finn’s neck to calm him down. Damn, that paternalistic alpha touch worked surprisingly well on even a mature, highly-placed shifter such as himself. His wolf lay down, alert but not crazed. He forced his lips closed because really it wasn’t his place to question the healer.
Lorcan pushed Finn back into his seat before taking his own. “Please sit down, Andrea, and tell us what’s wrong.” He gestured to the chair on the other end of the table.
The older female did as requested, fatigue and sadness obvious in the way she moved. “First, sir, let me assure you—all of you—,” she added with a pointed look in Finn’s direction. “That the pup is fine. A bit small for her age, which is hardly surprising given her father. Still, a good weight for her size, bright and cognitively age-appropriate.” She stopped and cocked her head. “The only odd thing is that if I didn’t know better, I would have mistaken her for a human child.”
“How so?” Fuck, Finn just couldn’t keep his mouth shut.
“I can’t really articulate the feeling. Her wolf seems a bit elusive, shall we say.”
This time, Lorcan managed to get a word in edge-wise. “She’s too young for her wolf to come out.”
“Of course, it’s just…” Andrea shook her head. “No matter. It’s Will I’m concerned about.”
Once again, Finn’s blood pressure spiked. He opened his mouth, shut it again, and reminded his wolf to stay down.
Lorcan sighed. “Go ahead, Finn. Ask any questions you want. I did say the boy was your responsibility.”
“Thanks.” He shot a grateful look at the alpha before returning his attention to the healer. “What’s wrong with him?” His tone was sharp enough to cut glass.
Andrea gave him that patient smile of hers. “I’m sorry, Beta, I don’t mean to worry you. It’s only that the omega is malnourished and undernourished. He needs more and better food.”
“Yeah, that I noticed already. We, Caleb and I, have been shoving food into him for the last few days.”
“I don’t think Magnus was feeding him very much,” Caleb added.
“Are you sure we can’t go snap this shifter’s neck, Boss?” Liam chimed in.
Lorcan shook his head. “Other than food, what does the boy need?”
“Clothing. Annie needs some, too. Will told me he’s been making hers from his own.” This was also something Finn knew already.
Craig leaned forward. “That’s an easy fix in the short-term. I’ll talk to Mabel. She and the other moms have started a pile of pup clothes for sharing. Our little ones weren’t exactly petite when they were born and have already outgrown a lot of stuff.” He looked at Finn. “I bet there’s things we have that would fit Annie.”
He smiled back. “Thanks, that sounds great. Maybe some of the sigmas have clothing they don’t need any more that we can give to Will. I lent him one of my shirts, but it’s like a bedsheet on him.” When the alpha gave him a discerning look, he felt compelled to explain. “He had to wash out his shirt every night. It was either lend him something or he’d have to sleep naked.”
And, that was so the wrong word to come out of his mouth. Not only did it intensify Lorcan’s expression, it flashed an image in his head of the boy the first night, flushed pink from his shower and totally nude.
Squashing down that memory, he focused again on Andrea. “Is there anything else wrong with him?”
The healer took in and let out a deep breath. “No. He’s otherwise healthy. It took some cajoling, but I finally got him to agree to a full physical, and well, as I said, there’s nothing wrong. I mean, he weathered the pregnancy surprisingly well, given how young he was when he bred.”
“He told you?”
Andrea nodded. “It happens and there’s nothing to be done about it now, naturally. The thing I’m concerned about is that he told me he was forced to wean Annie already because his milk dried up. Not surprising given his lack of nutrition.”
Finn frowned over at Caleb. “Yeah, we knew that. We gave the pup the same food we were eating, more or less. Is that a problem? You said she was fine.”
The healer gave him the kind of pointed look one gives to someone utterly clueless, but it was Lorcan who put the pieces together for him.
“He’s an omega who is no longer nursing and living in proximity to an alpha.”
“A very potent alpha,” Andrea emphasized. “He can go into heat at any time. The only thing perhaps preventing it is his lack of nourishment. But, I would really like it if we have a plan in place for when it does happen. This poor boy is so fragile emotionally, I don’t think he’d do well with an off-the-cuff decision about who is going to breed him. He’d fair better with the certainty of knowing in advance, and ideally by someone who will mate with him. He and Annie need the stability.
“I don’t want another Joey situation,” she added primly. “However well that turned out in the end.” She shot Liam a disarming smile to ease any sting her words might have caused.
“Agreed,” Lorcan said firmly. “Caleb, he already knows you, and you’re not mated. You’d seem to be the perfect choice.”
“No!” The denial popped out before Finn could swallow it back down. Inside, his wolf howled in protest. He looked wide-eyed at the alpha, hardly believing he’d dared to do such a thing, and not understanding why he’d object to an obvious solution. It wasn’t as if he wanted to breed the boy himself. Was it? No, he couldn’t do that. And, yet the idea of someone else taking Will sent an alarming surge of fury through him.
Lorcan eyed him thoughtfully. “Would you all excuse Finn and me, please?”
The question, being really an order, had the desired effect. Chairs scraped back and shifters filed out of the room in quick order. Soon, only Lorcan and Finn remained. He couldn’t bring himself to look the alpha in the eye.
A minute or two ticked by in silence. Finn could feel Lorcan’s gaze on him. Finally, the guy said, “I’ve left this alone because it didn’t seem relevant to your place in the pack. You’ve been a great beta, and I trust you completely.”
“But,” Finn offered, still staring at the table, the floor, the wall, anywhere but in the alpha’s too shrewd eyes.
“But, I noticed that when I teased you about falling for someone and mating, and when I see you sometimes looking at the pups and their sires, there’s more about you than I know. I’ve felt guilty about poking however innocently at what is clearly a painful and deep wound.”
Finn shook his head. “It doesn’t matter.”
“It does. Now, it does. I need the full story, Finn. Or, at least a fuller one. I know your pack was wiped out by a rival one, that they killed not only the fighting males, but the others as well, including the females, and pups.”
Terrorized whining. Whimpering begs for mercy. Screams. Blood everywhere. “Yes.” Finn’s response was barely a whisper. His stomach roiled.
“You had a mate and lost her or him?”
“Her.” He choked out the word, and Ashley’s lovely face smiled up at him.
“And,” Lorcan prompted.
“Our pup. Our son.”
The alpha swore softly and they sat in more silence for a while. “I’m sorry. I wouldn’t have put you in the position of taking care of Will if I’d known.”
Finn closed his eyes briefly. “This whole thing was a surprise to all of us. I won’t lie and say it’s been easy bringing Will and Annie back with me.” With a grimace, he added, “It’s been fucking torture, to be frank.”
“You’re off the hook. I’ll speak with Will and Caleb and see if they both can agree on the mating. Caleb seems like a solid, reliable guy, and he’s obviously already fond of Will, so—”
“No!” Shit, what is my problem?
Lorcan sighed again, then chuckled ruefully. “Damn, Finn, what am I supposed to do here? Your wolf keeps taking over your tongue. If you can’t keep it under control…” The alpha shook his head.
Frustrated with himself and pissed off at his wolf, Finn shoved his chair back and stood. He paced around the room, waging an internal battle. In the end, though, the outcome had never been in doubt. Despite the horror of his past and his intention to remain true to his love for Ashley and their pup, he couldn’t stand the idea of anyone else mating with Will. Of another male even mounting and breeding the omega. And, Annie. That sweet pup was already under his skin.
He stopped and placing his hands on his hips, frowned over at Lorcan. “I want him. Them. I hadn’t intended to take another mate or sire more pups. It was enough for me to belong to a pack again. Being your beta has given purpose to my life.”
With a heaving breath, he stared up at the ceiling for a moment. “My wolf has other ideas, it seems. It can’t bear the idea of Caleb or anyone else claiming Will and Annie, and I can’t convince it otherwise, apparently.”
He returned his gaze to his alpha, determined to show the sincerity of his next words. “I want them, and I promise I’ll be good to them. I’ll be the best mate and sire anyone could ever be. You have my word.”
With yet one more sigh, Lorcan stood. “There was never any doubt of that. I’d trust you with my own mate and pup, Finn, if it came to that. Do you think you can handle this?”
“Absolutely. My past won’t affect their lives. I won’t let it.”
“All right, then. The only thing left is to see if Will agrees. If he wants Caleb…”
“Then that’s who he gets. He deserves what he wants for a change.” Even as he said the words, meant them, would honor them, his wolf howled in defiance.
He told it to shut the fuck up.
****
The healer had been gone so long, Will had begun to worry that she’d forgotten them. Enough time had passed that Annie had fallen asleep against his shoulder. He stayed put in the room that doubled as a kind of medical facility, however. Orders were something he’d learned early to obey. Pacing around the room to keep Annie lulled, he tried not to fret about what was happening elsewhere in the longhouse. Andrea had assured him that Annie was healthy and safe in this pack, and he’d believed her. Fear still plagued him. Where his pup was concerned, no amount of worry was too much.
At the sound of approaching footsteps, he stopped, watched and waited. He knew even before he saw the alpha looming behind the healer that the female hadn’t returned on her own. The scent of the dominant male, along with his heavy tread, was a clear give-away. He automatically held Annie tighter, waking her inadvertently. She didn’t like that and let out a squall.
The healer gave him an indulgent smile. “Sorry to keep you waiting.” She held out her hands. “May I?”
Even though his brain screamed at him to not let go of his daughter, he made himself loosen his hold and hand the fussy pup over to the female. She immediately started to cajole Annie, who wasn’t very receptive to the touch.
“Let me take her out so that you and the alpha can talk. I promise not to go far. Perhaps she can be convinced to meet some of the other pups.”
Will glanced up at Lorcan, who stood to one side of the doorway. The alpha had a serious look on his face that didn’t bode well, yet Will didn’t detect any menace in the shifter. He nodded his assent, then watched with a sinking heart as the healer carried Annie out. Lorcan shut the door behind them. He gave Will what was probably intended to be a reassuring smile, but fell far from the mark. Will knew better than to ask what was wrong. The alpha would tell him in his own time what he wanted Will to know.
Lorcan rubbed at the back of his neck. “So. Caleb has filled me in on some of the details of your life in your old pack, and Andrea confirmed them based on her exam of you. I know that you came into your heat and were bred too young and too harshly.”
Embarrassed to hear his sordid history had been a topic of discussion, Will felt his cheeks heat up. He gazed down at the floor and because the alpha had paused as if expecting some kind of reaction, he gave a curt nod.
“Andrea said that you were forced to wean Annie early, and given that I’ve been known to throw pack members into heat quickly, we can expect you won’t be any different.”
Again, Will simply nodded mutely. A shudder ran through him as he was forced to face a fact that he’d already known. If he’d stayed in his old pack, Magnus would have eventually sent him into heat a second time. This alpha was clearly younger and more virile. Would he mount Will himself, or would he only throw him to the betas and gammas? The thought of enduring what he had before was terrifying. The seemingly endless parade of males, all a blur of pain and humiliation. Could he survive it all again? He had to. For Annie, he had to.
At least there were fewer higher-placed males in this pack, and Caleb might refuse to join in this time, too, leaving it down to only four counting the alpha. And, one of them would be Finn. That thought was more comforting than it should have been. It was because the beta had been kind during their trip. It gave Will some hope that the breeding wouldn’t be as bad.
“Will?”
He glanced up guiltily. He’d been so consumed with his thoughts, he’d forgotten he was in the presence of the alpha and should have had his full attention on him.
“I want you to understand that what happened before won’t again. I mean, there’s nothing anyone can do to stop your going into heat sometime soon, but when that does happen, your experience will be different.”
Not having a clue what that was supposed to mean, he nodded once more. “Yes, Alpha.”
“I don’t think you’re getting it, son. Come on, let’s sit down.”
Surprised at the offer, Will hunched in his shoulders and shuffled in the alpha’s wake to sit in one of the two sturdy chairs Andrea had in the office part of her large room. He sat next to the guy where indicated, supremely aware of how large and powerful the shifter next to him was. How easily the guy could bend Will’s body however he wanted to slake his needs. He made himself as small as possible, as if somehow Lorcan might forget he was even there.
“Will, can you please look at me?”
With a flutter of lashes and dredging up courage he didn’t think he had, Will did as asked.
The alpha smiled at him, this time in a more convincing way. “Thank you. Now, as I was saying, your next heat is going to be a different experience. You will not be mounted by me, first of all. Kyle is my mate, my heart, my everything. I only want to breed him.”
“I understand,” Will dared to say, somewhat relieved that he didn’t have to suffer the attentions of this alpha—any alpha.
“Good. Now, second, I’m only going to give one male access to you. Your heat only needs one to satisfy it and breed you, so that’s what’s going to happen.”
It took Will’s brain a second to catch up. “Only one?”
“Yes. Even if you want variety, you’re not going to get it.”
“No!” He swallowed hard to get himself under control. “I mean, thank you, Alpha. I only want one.” One male compared to a dozen sounded like paradise to him.
Lorcan scrubbed his face with his hand. “Yeah, that’s what I figured. But, there’s more. I want you to be mated, as well. You need someone to take care of you and Annie. And, any of your future pups. You haven’t been well-attended to so far in your life, and that’s going to change here. Our pack is made up of shifters that have been orphaned from other packs for one reason or another. I’m determined that we’ll be different, and that means looking out for and helping each other.”
“Mated.” Will rolled the word around in his head as if it were a foreign concept. It was for him. He’d given up since his first shift the idea that someday he’d be mated to a male that would care for and perhaps even love him. “Mated,” he said again, his gaze unfocused.
“I’m going to stand firm on this point, Will, if not for your sake, then for Annie’s. The only problem is that we’re not a big pack. Most of our males are sigmas, and they won’t be virile enough to breed an omega. It has to be a beta or a gamma. Liam and Craig are already mated, and Deidre’s out for obvious reasons,” Lorcan added with a huff of laughter.
“So, that leaves us with Caleb and Finn. Now, I know you’re already familiar with Caleb, but Finn has stepped up. He’s volunteered in strong terms to be your mate. Hopefully, that’s okay with you. If not? Well, the choice is yours. If you want Caleb, then that’s who you get.”
Will could hardly believe what he was hearing. The alpha was giving him a choice of mates, and that choice included Finn. He pictured the large beta with the hard expression, yet amazing kindness for both Will and Annie. He could even smell the beta’s scent that he’d lain wrapped in every night when he’d put on the male’s shirt. The large, hot body had kept him warm at night without preying on him even though Finn could have done so easily.
And being a beta, he was in a high position within the pack. The alpha obviously trusted him or he wouldn’t have sent him out to other packs looking for a gamma. To have such a powerful mate would mean Annie and their future pups would be provided for and protected. Wasn’t that the most important thing?
The thought of being mounted again by anyone made his skin crawl and his stomach turn. But, his omega nature wouldn’t be denied. There was no way to avoid going into heat. It might be easier if Caleb claimed him because he was familiar to Will, and he knew the gamma was a good guy, a known quantity. That might make things better for Will, except his needs and wants weren’t the only thing. Or, even the most important thing. Annie and his future pups mattered more. If he had to have a mate, he may as well have the best possible one for them purely on a pragmatic basis.
“It’s hard, sir,” he admitted in a quiet voice. “I’ve never had to make such an important decision before.”
The alpha placed his hand lightly on Will’s shoulder. Amazingly, the touch steadied him. “You don’t have to decide right now. We have some time, although there’s no way to tell how much, and this isn’t something to decide in the throes of your heat.”
Will nodded. “I understand.” Taking a deep breath, he forced himself to meet the alpha’s gaze. “And, I’m not sure time will help me decide anyway.” With a fluttering in his stomach, he made up his mind. “I accept the beta’s offer. I’ll mate with Finn.”
Gods, he hoped he was making the right choice because once his heat began, there would be no going back.