Chapter Twenty-Four

Together Again

 

The first time a demon sealed his mouth over mine and sucked my life force from me, Silverlight had dropped to the ground, dark and silent. It had been her only defense.

She didn’t do that this time.

She had grown stronger each time she’d fought, and as Seamus attempted to kill me, to take me, I flung her toward him. Into him.

She didn’t go for his heart—she went for his brain.

But a demon’s brain was apparently very well protected, and she glanced off the impenetrable bone of his skull.

I felt it. It was as though by feeding, by attaching himself to me, Seamus was me. Or I was him. It was vague and fuzzy, but it was there. I felt a buzz like electric shocks when the lethal tip of Silverlight’s blade glanced off his skull. I felt her recoil from that shock.

And then, I felt, as Seamus did, the very second Miriam turned on him.

She slid across my cheek, tasted my blood, and then, she slammed herself through the demon’s eye. His face broke apart. I felt that, too.

For a few seconds, before the seal of Seamus’s mouth was broken, I felt her cold, sick blade slide into his brain.

We both screamed, the demon and I.

I felt his death, because for a brief second, it was my death.

And then, I slammed to the ground, struggling to breathe again. My men knelt around me, Silverlight slid inside me, and my fingers were wrapped around Blacklight’s hilt in a death grip.

“The demon is dead,” I whispered. “She killed him.”

Miriam had saved my life.

Maybe she’d saved herself from the torments of hell or had chosen the lesser of two evils or had wanted to be back among us.

Or maybe I was just being fanciful.

But I was alive.

She did not shrink, as Silverlight had done in the days before she’d become part of me, and I didn’t release her. I was afraid of what she might do if she wasn’t controlled.

“Your despair?” Amias asked, staring down at me, his eyes full of worry. “Did he leave you with despair?”

“No,” I murmured. “It went with him. My mind is my own.”

It took me ten minutes to recover enough to sit up. I still felt a little fuzzy, as though a tiny slice of me had leaked away and wasn’t coming back. Like part of me remained in hell.

But even if it had, the biggest part of me was right there with my men, my protectors, the loves of my life. They were injured, but they were alive—just as I was.

Finally, I stood, with a little help, and took stock of the situation. I hurt all over. My legs were shaky and weak, and I didn’t try to walk. I would only have fallen.

Rhys sat with his back against a crumbling tombstone, listing slightly to the right. I didn’t need him to tell me what his last shift had taken from him, or that he was in trouble.

“Rhys,” I murmured.

“It’ll take time,” he answered.

Clayton took my hand. “Are you okay?”

I nodded. “I’m more worried about all of you.” I looked at Angus. I didn’t say anything, and neither did he.

“Let’s get her home,” Shane said, finally.

Without a word, Angus lifted me, holding me against his chest as tightly as he could without hurting me. I shivered at his restrained strength.

Leo held out a hand to Rhys and pulled him to his feet. “I can toss you over my shoulder,” he offered.

Rhys declined. “I’ll walk.”

Amias melted into the shadows of the graveyard, where he’d likely get a little sleep before night sneaked up on us.

I kept my gaze on Angus as he carried me from Willow-Wisp. His face was carved and shadowed in the late evening light, and I reached up to trace his lips with my fingertips. “You didn’t let them break you in the Byrdcage. Don’t let them break you now.”

He let me down on the way station porch and I laced my fingers with his, needing to touch him. The others stood quietly, listening, waiting.

Angus stared down at me, his eyes glittering, dark, almost unfamiliar. But I saw something else, as well. I saw his acceptance. “I needed to fuck myself up.”

“You did that.”

He rubbed his face, tired. “If there’d been a better way, I’d have taken it.”

I squeezed his fingers. “Yeah. You would have.”

Jin came through the doorway. “We must finish the potion before the items begin to rot.” He pointed at the object Leo clutched, and it was only then that I realized the half-giant had brought the remnant of Angus’s horn out of Willow-Wisp.

“Are you well enough to lose some blood?” Clayton asked me.

“Do we really need to do that now?” I asked. “Seamus is gone.”

Jin stared down his nose at all of us. “There will always be demons to battle, and you will always need weapons with which to fight them.”

I nodded. If not for Blacklight, I probably wouldn’t have survived the encounter. Or worse, I would have survived it in hell. Perhaps he’d have forged a new sword from me, would have named me…Whitelight, or some such, and would have brought me back to kill my own.

I shuddered. “You’re right. We’ll finish the potion as soon as it’s dark and Amias arrives.” But before we went inside, there was something I needed to do.

“Clayton,” I murmured.

He said nothing, just waited, barely breathing, not daring to hope.

I gave him Blacklight.

His fingers trembled the tiniest bit when he took her.

“She’s yours now,” I told him. “No more fear. You’re no one’s slave. No one’s victim.”

He swallowed hard as he stared down at the blade in his hand. He nodded. “It’s over.”

And it was.

At least that part.

“How will you control that sword?” Shane asked him. “She’ll kill you, too, as soon as she gets the opportunity.”

He was right. I knew it, and I’d hesitated before giving her to Clayton. But there was nothing he needed more than that sword.

“I won’t give her the opportunity.” Clayton’s voice was low, sure. “I will master her. In the end, she’ll be mine, and she’ll know it.”

Jin held open the door. “Come inside,” he said, ever impatient.

Holding on to Angus’s big arm, I walked through the doorway of the way station. “Night is coming,” I said. “And the rifters may come with it.”

The demons were gone, and Clayton was free.

But the biggest fight was yet to come.

My heart began to beat hard and fast with excitement and fear and dread. It was as though everything we’d faced before had been practice for the real test.

Something huge had been coming for a long time, and now that it had nearly arrived, I wasn’t sure I was ready for it.

I wasn’t sure any of us were.