My father glances over at the bartender. “Thanks for the heads-up, Nancy.”
She smiles through her discomfort, peering up at him with respect, “Anytime, Prez.” She has a towel wrapped around her arm where the bullet grazed her. She’s lucky she fell to the floor crying when she was hit; it probably saved her life and also gave her the chance to call my dad.
A gasp escapes me as the knowledge comes to light that she knew who I am and called my dad to tell him I was here. He turns toward me, his eyes soft as he takes me in and begins to speak, but I cut him off.
“How long has she known who I am? Was she calling you every time I was in here?” I fume, with the thought of being watched the entire time. She saw Viking claiming me for heaven’s sake. What I do is none of my father’s business; he gave up that right many years ago.
“Princess,” he starts and I interrupt what I know is about to be some sugarcoated bullshit answer. They always are.
“No. Tell me the truth, damn it. I have a right to know; it’s my life.”
“I mean, what do you think? You’re right down the road from the club, sugar. You’re my daughter, and I’m the President of the Oath Keepers. Every bar in the county has had a picture of you and known who you are since you were seventeen years old.”
“So…What? You’ve had people there to spy on me? And what would you have done if I messed up anyhow? You’ve always been too busy to be a father, so why even care to let them know? Does my privacy mean absolutely nothing to you?”
His eyes become a little glossy as his expression falls flat. “You want the truth, fine. I told them to memorize your face, if you ever showed up, to make sure no one messed with you and if you had any problems ever, to call the club. I paid them well for the favor, but I also threatened to rip their fuckin’ guts out if they didn’t comply. Like it or not, Princess, you’re my kid, and I protect my family.”
His words hit my heart like an arrow finding its target. I want to scream and cry, lash out at him with ‘why’ questions: Why wasn’t he there? Why didn’t he want us? Why did he hurt everyone? Why weren’t we good enough? Why didn’t he ever come for us, or actually fucking stay and love us?
I’ve wondered those things my entire life, but he doesn’t deserve my questions, and he hasn’t earned my respect to listen to his answers. So, I revert to the only thing that’s ever guarded my heart against being completely shattered by him—my words.
Standing a little straighter, I stare down the man standing in front of me. In so many ways we resemble each other. If he had a female version of himself, it would be me; only I don’t abandon people that I love.
Many men in this area fear him, never being able to figure out what digs deep, they call him the ‘rational’ President. He’s supposedly the one who thinks everything through and never lets a thing get to him. Well, newsflash, I’ve had years to perfect just what to say, so it hits home for him. He doesn’t get off scot-free ripping our family apart with no repercussions.
I guess I really am like him in one way; I’m the strong one. But I’ve had to be.
Mimicking him, I shutter any trace of emotion from my face, and then I let the words fly. “I’m with Viking; he’s the one who actually protects me. I don’t need you; in fact, I’ve never needed you. My mother stuck around and did everything so you could be a piece of shit sperm donor and go off with your buddies, so please, don’t stop now. And while you’re gone, do us all a favor and stop breathing.”
Brently steps beside us, placing his hand on my arm. “Princess, stop it. You don’t know everything.”
My father glances sadly at my brother and shakes his head. “No son, don’t. Just let it go.”
Brently huffs, sending me an irritated glance before letting his hand fall off my arm and moving toward the door.
Glaring spitefully at my father, I practically spit, “I see you’ve turned him into a good little puppet; nice job, Daddy.” I can’t help myself; my brother’s not the man he used to be, and my father does nothing to steer him from the path he’s on. He’s going to get Brently fucking killed.
Brently spins suddenly, striding toward me in a rush, bellowing, “Will you just shut the fuck up for once?”
Viking jumps in front of him, stopping Brently mid-stride in his pursuit of me, “Snake, not trying to disrespect you or get involved in your family business and all, but that’s my Ol’ Lady you’re talking crazy to. I won’t allow it.”
My brother turns toward my father like a good little soldier, waiting for his orders.
“He’s right son; she belongs to him. He deals with her, not you.”
“She’s my fucking sister,” Brently argues, and my dad raises his eyebrows. Irritated, my brother meets my hurt gaze. “Fine, you know what? Fuck it. Princess, you wanna act like a spoiled fucking brat? Well, stay the hell away from me.”
Viking growls, ready to lay into Brently in my defense, but my brother raises his hands and backs up a few steps, then spins around, storming outside.
Stay away from him? But we’ve always been there for each other. He was just as screwed up inside as I was growing up. How did I suddenly become the bad guy in all of this? His words slash me inside like razors carving up my flesh. It takes every ounce of pride to stand tall and not start bawling like I want to. Nothing I said was meant to upset my brother.
My father clears his throat, his gaze peering down at my feet as he mumbles, “Sug’, when you’re ready, we’ll talk.” He takes a deep breath and turns away.
Passing Viking, my dad pauses long enough to rest his hand on Vike’s bicep. I watch intently as he thanks him, expecting my dad to give Viking shit for what just went down, but he doesn’t. They shake hands; a mutual respect exchanged and then my father’s swiftly out the same door as my brother.
He’s gone again. The same as every other time I’ve seen him in my life. He always takes off, never staying and fighting with me like I wish he would.
“Princess.” A raspy grumble comes from the other side of me as Ares angrily follows suit, leaving now that my father’s obviously ready and waiting.
I keep quiet as Viking watches the exchange like a hawk.
After a few moments the bar’s finally empty, minus the nosey bartender who’s stuck cleaning up the huge mess that we’ve made. Viking strides toward me, pulling me into his embrace. His warmth cocoons me, and I break.
I fucking crumble.
The tears come at me with such a powerful force that my legs give out. I could fall to the floor, and at this moment, I don’t care. Everything that just happened with Viking’s dad, all the new information and secrets he was hiding from me, from his brothers. After that huge revelation, there was so much hate and violence; I’ve never seen so much blood before.
The argument with my brother and my father…Brently’s words—I can’t believe he told me to stay away. I love him; I was protecting us. How can he not see that I’m angry to keep my family from hurting?
Sucking in a sob, my heart and body ache so badly, the only comfort I feel is the heat from this man holding me so desperately, his strength promising me that he’ll never let me go. With one arm across my back, keeping me up and against him, he bends a little, tucking his free arm under my butt so he can lift me fully into his embrace.
Complying, I run my hands over his solid chest, wrapping them around his neck and tuck my face against his throat. I’m able to find a sense of peace, being pressed against his heated skin, feeling the pulse beat strongly, reassuring me that he’s safe and not leaving me as well.
“Shhh, Cinderella; I’ve got you, baby,” he rumbles quietly, and I feel him start to walk, carrying me to his hotel room.
I try to quiet and slow the tears, but no matter what I think of, my body does what it wants. Viking doesn’t complain, though; he just holds me tighter to him.
Once we get inside the room, he carefully lays me in the middle of his bed and then takes his boots off. I turn over to my side, giving him my back and tuck my fists under the pillow I’m lying on. My tears still fall freely; they’re just silent now.
The bed dips behind me, and I start to protest that I can’t possibly turn it off enough to have sex right now. Viking distracts me so much, but at this moment, my body needs time to process and heal. Before I’m able to form the right words, so I don’t hurt him by turning him down, he pulls my back into his body.
His heat engulfs me like a blanket, and I’m shocked to realize that I was so cold and alone when he had laid me down. I felt his warmth on the way over here in his arms, but once I was away from him, I felt nothing.
How can someone break through enough that even when your body is in shock, it still recognizes them?
It feels like we’re in bed for hours with daylight fading to dusk. I lie completely silent and still against Viking as my tears escape. He doesn’t move once, holding me snuggly against him with his right arm. His head is resting on his left bicep as he softly plays with my hair, gently pulling it off my face as he soundlessly watches me cry. He doesn’t have to speak to fix me; he holds me, offering his support and comfort.
For a woman like me, that’s all I’ll ever need.
The brightness outside slowly disappears until it resembles dimmed lights flooding throughout the room as the sun finally sets and my emotions come to a crashing halt. I’ve found balance again, but my body’s exhausted, feeling as if I haven’t slept in days.
The tears stop completely, my tender cheeks starting to dry as my eyes get droopy, and it hits me that for the first time besides my mom, I feel cherished by someone. My heart doesn’t weep from being devastated anymore because of my father’s actions. Sure it still hurts me a great deal, but I can almost picture it mending back together—piece by jagged piece—as someone else fills up all the little voids with glue, making me whole again. Teaching me to open my heart and love again, not to push them away, but pull them near.
With that blissful thought, my eyes close and I whisper the words that have the power to crush me if they wanted to. They could dismantle me in the end, pull me apart by the seams if used against me. But even with that scary vulnerability exposed, he deserves to hear them, because even if he’s my undoing, my heart belongs to him.
“I love you, Vike.”
The whisper’s soft as it leaves my lips, but with the weight of what those three little words mean to me, it may as well have been a shout as I finally admit it to him out loud.
He doesn’t skip a beat, continuing to play with my hair. It’s okay, though; I didn’t expect him to answer me back. I like to believe inside that he truly cares for me, and right now, that’s enough.
Snuggling into the pillow as wonderful sleep starts to overtake my senses, Viking breaks the silence with his deep rasp.
“I know, Cinderella.”
Holding my breath, not letting myself succumb yet, I wait for him to tell me it’s over, that he can’t be tied down, even if I am supposed to be his Ol’ Lady.
A few beats pass before he continues, “I’ve loved you since I found you behind that bar and you looked at me like I was your savior instead of a monster.”
He grows quiet, and one last tear slips free as my heart sings with his declaration. Moving my hand to his at my waist, he threads our fingers together and pulls me a little tighter. His lips meet the back of my neck sweetly as I fall into the best sleep of my existence.