CHAPTER 2
Alistair
She thinks I don’t even know her name, let alone notice her. But I see everything. There’s no need to talk when I can just watch the world with my own two eyes and my own two ears. I learn so much more when I just observe.
And I’ve been observing her since the first day she started here.
I don’t know how she managed to get the job here. She doesn’t fit the type they usually hire. Stuffy, yet somehow subservient. People who can’t wait to bend over backwards in the hope that they’ll get something handed to them for free.
I wish it weren’t the case, but I can’t say I blame them. Everyone wants something for nothing. Everybody’s searching for something. Even me.
The one thing I want more than anything is gone forever, and it’s been that way my entire time on this planet. I just can’t let it go no matter how hard I try.
My family wants me to put on a happy face, but I can’t. It’s not who I am. I believe in being absolutely genuine and honest at all times. As much as I appreciate positivity and happiness, I’m not going to pretend I’m that way when I’m not.
I see it far too often anyways. Plastic smiles and offers of “help.” People are angling for what my family and I have. We’ve been lucky, no doubt. But sometimes I wonder what it would be like to just be a normal guy. To be able to walk down the street late at night and just pull into one of those American type dinners like you see in the old paintings and photographs. Instead of all this highbrow food, to just order a plate of eggs, some sausage links, and mop up the plate with a piece of toast. I’d even toast it on both sides. Not very English of me, but that’s the point.
Manners for manners sake are a joke if you ask me. I want something real. Someone real.
Her.
I watch her. The way she goes about her day. I sit up in my room and stay back from the window a bit. Just in case she ever looks my way.
I see a young woman with the enthusiasm and joy of a little girl when she’s out there playing with those dogs. She doesn’t have a care in the world.
The head of our staff wanted to fire her after her first week on the job. Instead I logged into the system with a secret username and password I have and upgraded her into the system to his same pay grade. Now he couldn’t fire her. I can only imagine how shocked he was when he came in on Monday only to see they were already equals.
It took her a week to get to where he was at after six years. But that wasn’t the most meteoric ascent she’d taken since she’d arrived. Since day one I’d had my sights set on her. But being the way things are there was nothing I could do about it. Only watch from a distance and secretly do whatever I could to make her job here easier and better.
I allocated more money for the dogs. More tennis balls that she could throw to them. Higher quality food and water. I wanted those dogs to be as happy as they could, which I knew would make her happy.
It was only right being how happy she made me.
But me being a royal and her being one of the staff wasn’t the only problem. She was much younger than me. It’s as if every card in the deck was stacked against us.
I’d stay up at night trying to think of a solution to how we could be together. The wheels inside my head spinning round and round like the London Eye. But just like the famous and giant Ferris wheel along the South Bank of the River Thames, my journey always ended up right where it started…without a solution.
And how could I even be so sure she’d be interested. My reputation was so poor most of the daily papers had an entire page devoted to negative things about me. And the age difference would likely put her off even more.
It was ironic considering the long list of women my family constantly tried to introduce to me. I was never interested. Not one single time. Those women were dying to be a part of the royal family and I was dying to get them out of my presence.
I don’t think she even cared about any of that. And that’s one of the reasons I wanted to meet her so badly. I just needed a way to do it without tipping anyone off. Even though our staff is excellent who knows what the press offers them. We already know about certain people being approached for information about what goes on inside the gate each day. If word got out that something was going on between us the papers would have a field day more than they already do.
Not that I care really. But I do respect and honor what my family has built over the centuries. I need to remind myself that I can’t go off being greedy and doing what I want at the expense of our entire family. My older brother will be king one day after all. I don’t want to ruin things for him, and everyone involved.
But just those words burn me. “Ruin things.”
How could finally being able to choose what I want with my life ruin anything? Being trapped inside this glass house isn’t ruining my life? I’m certainly not complaining about my good fortunes, but it’s nothing without the right woman to share it with.
For years I thought there was no such thing as the right woman for me.
How one moment changed all that.
After thirty-five years on this planet and meeting thousands of people if not hundreds of thousands, or even billions if you include the people who “meet me” via television, I was sure there wasn’t a woman out there for me.
And then she showed up and everything changed.
She flipped my world upside down, and in the process it was like a light switch flipped on inside me.
I wanted to start living more. To feel. To be with her.
Food tasted better. Colors were more vibrant. I was excited to wake up every day knowing she’d be just outside my window.
But the sudden pleasure was turning into a pain. As long as she was there she served as a reminder of what I couldn’t have.
I had all the money, power, and influence in the world, but I would have traded it all for one day with her.
But how can I make this fantasy become a reality?