Chapter Nine
Kit
“And this,” I said, pushing through the door at the end of the hall, “is the kitchen—”
Turning my head, I stopped dead in my tracks in the doorway. My brothers were sitting at the island, both of them naked from the waist up.
Oh, Jesus. Not now.
Not bloody now.
I’d wanted to ease Emily into life here at Primrose. Make these three months as painless as possible. I also wanted to draw a firm line between which parts of my life she’d be a part of, and which she wouldn’t.
I wanted to keep her away from my siblings. Sure, Emily would interact with them as necessary for the cameras. But in private, there was no need for them to comingle. My siblings were my soft spot. I knew if they really interacted with Emily, got to know her, they’d like her. Who wouldn’t? It was why we’d picked her for the role.
But I worried if they liked her, then maybe I would, too. It was a slippery slope from like to lust to…God knew what. Would she make me reckless all over again? I didn’t want to find out.
“The lovebirds at last,” Rob said, wiping crumbs from his hands as he rose from his stool.
“Finally!” Jack said. “We’ve been waiting all night—day—wait, what day is it again? We just woke up.”
“Who is that?” Emily asked from behind me.
“My brothers,” I ground out. As usual, Rob had made himself quite at home; the velvety scent of freshly brewed coffee filled the kitchen, even though it was half past five in the evening. It made me think of mum. She’d always been a big coffee drinker.
“Oh! I’m so glad,” Emily said.
“I’m not.” I turned my glare on Rob. “I thought we discussed this. I know you live next door, but you’ve got to be decent if you’re going to come over. What if the Prime Minister was visiting?”
Rob looked down at his boxer briefs—he wore nothing else, naturally—then looked back up at me. “But I am decent. My naughty bits are covered. What else could you possibly want me to wear?”
“Trousers, for starters.” I looked at Jack. He was wearing a shirt, but there was a—wait, was that a mushroom?—drawn in black marker on his forehead. “And you. What the hell is that on your face?”
“What is it?” Emily whispered.
I didn’t budge.
Jack shrugged as he shoveled a soggy spoonful of cereal into his mouth. “Ask Rob. He’s the one who drew it.”
“It’s a penis,” Rob said matter-of-factly.
“Okay, now I have to see it,” Emily said.
“Out,” I growled. “The two of you, get out, now, and don’t come back until that—that thing on your head is gone.”
Rob responded by leaning back against the counter and crossing his arms. “We heard you’re getting engaged.”
“We heard from the internet,” Jack added.
I stiffened. I had planned on telling my siblings about the engagement later this week, after the news broke. It was admittedly weird that I hadn’t told them—that I hadn’t introduced Emily to anyone except Rob—especially considering how close the four of us were.
But my intentions had been good. I wanted to protect my family; I wanted Rob and Jack and Jane to have plausible deniability if things went wrong. I had considered telling them the truth, but I decided against it. For starters, Jane would never allow me to put myself at risk on her behalf. And my brothers weren’t exactly models of discretion.
The less everyone knew, the better.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner,” I said. “Emily and I had to keep things under wraps to prevent leaks—you understand.”
Rob tipped his head to the side, studying my face. “I don’t, actually. The leaks happened anyway. And we’re your family, for Christ’s sake. We haven’t a clue who this lovely lady of yours is. Don’t you think that’s a bit odd?”
Of course it was odd. It was a fake engagement. But Emily and I had to sell it to the media. My brothers were a much less discerning audience. Surely we could sell it to them, too? Maybe Emily meeting them in private like this wasn’t such a bad thing. She could help me make this whole charade seem more believable.
I pinched the bridge of my nose and let out a sigh. “Is there anything I can do to convince you to wash that thing off your head before you meet Emily?”
Jack pursued his lips. “No. If she can’t love us at our worst—”
“Then she doesn’t deserve us at our best,” Rob finished with a triumphant grin. “C’mon, Kit, let her in.”
“Yes, Kit, let me in!” Emily said.
Shooting my brothers one last glare, I stepped aside to reveal Emily. She moved forward, stopping at the threshold, and crossed her arms as she looked at Jack’s forehead.
“I would’ve guessed it was a mushroom,” she said, mouth twitching.
“Wishful thinking,” I muttered.
“I’m afraid small penises run in the family,” Rob said. “But I’m sure you’ve already discovered that for yourse—”
“One more,” I snapped. “One more penis reference, and I swear to God I’m kicking you both out and changing the locks.”
Rob held up his hands. “Sorry, sorry. It’s just that we already feel so….at home with Emily. Come here, dear, and let me welcome you to the family! It’s so lovely to see you again. I knew the moment I set eyes on you that you were something special.” He held out his arms and strode over, wrapping her in a hug. Emily let out a pained breath when he gave her a squeeze. “Darling, you smell marvelous! Here, let me get a bit closer…I swear that’s just my wallet there…wait, these boxers haven’t got any pockets for a wallet…”
Jesus Christ.
“That’s quite enough,” I said, disentangling Emily from my brother’s paws. “Emily, you might want to wash your hands. You never know where Robert has been last or what diseases he might’ve brought home with him.”
Jack barked with laughter. “Might want to wash ‘em twice today.”
“Twice?” Emily was biting back a smile again. “Is that because he brought home two girls last night?”
“Yes!” Jack’s whole face lit up. She was talking to them like regular people, too, and they were loving it just as much as I did. Shit. “How did you know?”
Her eyes moved to Robert. “Lucky guess. Is that a new record for you, Rob?”
He held a finger to his lips and shook his head. “A gentleman does not kiss and tell, Emily. But since we’re family now, I suppose there’s no harm in telling you that no, I am proud to say it is most decidedly not a new record.”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” I said. I’d warned Rob more than once that his dick would fall off if he wasn’t more careful with girls. I may have been the Ice Prince, but Rob took great pride in being the Playboy Prince.
Emily cut a glance at me, her shoulders beginning to shake. Rob started laughing, too, and then Jack joined in, their laughs identical and deep and carefree.
Bloody hell. This is exactly what I didn’t want to happen. The lot of them making fast friends over a shared love of dick jokes. Don’t get me wrong, I loved a good dick joke. But maybe that was the problem.
I couldn’t laugh. If I laughed—it could be the start of that slippery slope, couldn’t it?
I looked at Emily. There was no trace of heartbreak in her eyes. Only mischief. Mayhem.
I bit my lip, hard. I wouldn’t smile. I wouldn’t smile. I wouldn’t smile.
Even if my house suddenly felt like a home for the first time in years. Even if it felt like an actual family lived here, instead of an eternally sleep-deprived single bloke who lived on beer and cold leftovers.
People, laughter, coffee. The things I’d grown up around. Our life as a family had been chaos—with four children in the house, how could it not?—but it had been happy and fun. It had been home.
I dug my fingers into my chest, rubbing at the ache that had formed there.
“You okay?” Emily asked, her laughter fading.
I met her eyes. Not an hour after moving in, and already she fit right in here. She wasn’t put off by my brothers and their boxers and penis drawings. She wasn’t intimidated by them. She’d got them laughing, talking.
God damn her.
“I’m fine,” I clipped.
I was fine.