Chapter Six
Seth pushed his hair from his eyes as he stumbled into the kitchen and over to the coffeepot. It had been a rough night. Worried about her grandmother, Anna had tossed and turned until the wee hours of the morning, refusing to fall asleep until just a few short hours ago. As a result, Seth had only gotten a couple of hours himself. As much as he wanted to sleep the day away, he knew he couldn’t. It was already midmorning. He had to check on the Saab and make sure that mechanic didn’t mess with it too much. He also wanted to talk to that friend of Anna’s grandmother, Kendra Bennett. Something wasn’t right about Lucie, and he wanted to find out exactly what was going on. He had a feeling that Kendra was the person with the answers.
“There you are.”
Seth jumped back in surprise and then relaxed when he saw Lucie at the kitchen island.
“Good morning. How are you feeling?”
She brought her coffee cup to her lips. “Fine. Never been better.”
“You—you know who I am, don’t you?”
Lucie flashed him an exasperated look. “Of course I know. You’re the young man dating my Annabelle. Seth.”
Seth let out a long breath. “That’s right. I’m Seth.” He turned back to the coffee machine. Perhaps things weren’t as bad as they had thought. She certainly seemed lucid this morning.
“Do you love her?” she asked.
He turned to face her. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me. Do you love her?” She asked the question slow and loud, as if he was hard of hearing.
Seth frowned and thought about how close he and Anna had become the past couple of days. “Yeah. Yeah, I do.”
“Good.” She thumped her cane on the ground. “In the end, that’s all that really matters. The rest tends to take care of itself.”
Experience told him otherwise, but he wasn’t going to argue. Instead he smiled and turned back to the machine.
“More coffee?” he asked, holding up the pot.
She pointed at the pot with her cane. “I don’t know how warm that is. It’s old.”
“I’m sure it’s fine.” Seth found two mugs and poured what was left of the pot. While he worked, he felt Lucie’s curious eyes burning a hole in his back.
After pouring in some milk and sugar, he stirred the concoction and tasted it. Satisfied that it wasn’t going to kill him—one never knew with the way she was looking at him—he turned and leaned against the edge of the counter. “Is there something you wanted to ask me?”
She stared at him for a moment before responding. “How is Anna doing?”
He started to lie and say she was doing great, but changed his mind. “She’s tired. We didn’t get much sleep last night.”
Her eyes twinkled. “Having a little fun, are we?”
“No, more like she’s worried.”
“Worried?” Lucie took a sip from her cup. “About what?”
“About you.”
The old woman made a sound of dismissal. “There’s no need to worry about me. I’m fine.”
“Are you?”
“Of course.” She waved her hand in the air. “Although I’m going to turn to dust waiting here for you two to take me into town.”
“You need to go into town?”
“To get my package.”
“The one from Mary Borcher?”
“That’s the one. She makes the best moonshine. Nice and sweet.”
“You had us pick it up yesterday.”
Lucie frowned and put down her cup. “I did?”
“Yeah. I put it in the fridge.” Seth grabbed the paper bag out of the fridge and placed it next to her.
“Funny, I don’t remember sending you to the festival.”
Seth started to reply, but a knock at the door stopped him. Within seconds, Kendra Bennett’s voice bellowed through the house. “Lucie? Are you home?”
“I’m in here.”
Kendra rounded the corner into the kitchen. Lucie immediately smiled and held out her hands. “Kendra! I’m so glad you’re here. I’ve been waiting for these two lazybones to get out of bed. Seems as if they want to sleep the day away.”
Kendra chuckled. “My boys are the same way.” She glanced at the bag on the island. “What’s that?”
“Oh, nothing.” Lucie pushed the bag into Seth’s hands. “The kids just picked up some groceries for me. Seth was going to put it into the refrigerator.”
When Kendra flashed him a questioning look, Seth smiled and put the bag away. “That’s right.”
“Oh, good morning,” Anna said as she shuffled into the kitchen.
“Good morning, dear.” Kendra turned to her friend. “Ready to go?”
“Where are you two off to?” Anna asked.
“The sweet shop,” Kendra said.
“Adrianne makes the best chocolate,” Lucie added.
Anna glanced at Seth then returned her focus on the women. “Grandma, I was wondering if we could have a little chat about what happened last night.”
Lucie waved her cane in the air. “Later, dear. Adrianne will be expecting us.”
“Grandma, this is important,” Anna said.
“I’ll be home after lunch, dearie. We can talk then.”
Kendra patted her friend’s shoulder. “Why don’t you head out to the car? I just want to use the restroom before we leave.”
“Sure.”
“But, Grandma . . .” Anna let out a frustrated noise as her grandmother walked away.
“She’s avoiding us,” Seth muttered when the three of them were alone.
Kendra let out a long breath and eased into one of the chairs. “She is avoiding you.”
“Why?” Anna asked.
“It’s a long story.”
“Tell us.”
Kendra glanced at Seth, then at Anna. “Your grandmother isn’t well,” she said.
“We gathered that.” Seth leaned his elbows on the island. “What’s wrong with her?”
“Dementia, I’m afraid. She has always been a little forgetful, but over the past several months it has gotten a lot worse. A few of us in the book club encouraged her to go see a doctor. Long story short, she ended up at the hospital in York for several days while they were trying to figure things out.”
Anna sat next to Kendra as surprise lit her features. “She never told me.”
Seth moved to stand behind Anna. He placed his hands on her shoulders and started kneading. The motion came so naturally to him, an offshoot of what he had learned at the spa. As Kendra talked, he continued to work, trying to offer what little support he could.
“They ran some tests at the hospital and confirmed what we all suspected.” She patted Anna’s hand. “I’m afraid your grandmother has early-stage Alzheimer’s.”
“Is there anything they can do to help her?”
Kendra shook her head. “They have her on all sorts of medication, but she forgets to take it.” She glanced at the door that led back into the house. “The girls and I try to visit her every day, just to check up on her, but we are all busy, and some of us are suffering from our own health issues.”
“And that’s why you had her call Anna,” Seth guessed.
Kendra nodded. “She didn’t want to burden you. She said that you were some bigwig in Chicago and wouldn’t want to move out here to take care of an old woman. While that might be true, I reminded her that you are also her granddaughter. If it was my family, I’d want to know.”
“But she seemed fine when we arrived.”
“She has good days and bad days, as we all do.” Kendra stretched her legs out in front of her. “It’s terrible getting old.”
“We could look into a home,” Seth suggested. “Somewhere where people are trained to deal with that type of thing.”
“She doesn’t want that,” Kendra said. “She says that Sapphire Falls is her home, always has been. She doesn’t want to move.”
“I can understand why she would want to live in the farmhouse,” Anna said. “This is her childhood home. She’s never lived anywhere else.”
“It’s more than the farmhouse.” Kendra nodded out toward the rolling fields behind the house. “She wants to stay close to her son as well.”
Anna glanced up at Seth. “After my father died, we buried him over by the large oak tree out there.”
“I see.”
Anna turned back to Kendra. “I had no idea. I would have come sooner—”
“Don’t beat yourself up over it, child. It’s in the past.” She flashed Seth a pointed look. “What matters now is what we do from here.”
“Well, I’m staying, of course,” Anna said.
Seth stilled his hands. “Wait a minute.”
Kendra nodded. “It seems as if you two have a lot to discuss.” She started to stand, but ran into a little difficulty. Seth moved to help her.
“Thank you, son.” She patted his hand then pushed it away. “Now, if you two will excuse me, Lucie and I have a shopping date.”
As Seth watched Kendra disappear out the front door, he tried to digest all the information he had gotten over the past several minutes.
“I’m a terrible granddaughter,” Anna said as she put her head in her hands.
“What?” Seth quickly sat down next to her. “No.”
“Yes, I am.” Slowly she lifted her head and met Seth’s gaze. “I never visited, not in the past six years. I rarely called.”
“A lot of people forget to call. They get busy.”
“Not like me.” She let out a long breath. “I let my fears get the best of me. I didn’t want to deal with the memories of my parents and my awkward childhood, so I neglected the only family I had.” She rubbed her eyes and took in a ragged breath. “Now that family is gone.”
“No, not gone. Your grandmother is still with us . . .” He started to slide his arm around her shoulder, but she brushed it off.
“You can’t put your entire life on hold because of your grandmother.”
“She’s the only family I have.”
Seth leaned back from her, stunned. Just yesterday he had felt that they had really connected. Was Anna going to brush him off without another thought?
“We have a life back in Chicago,” he said.
“I know.”
“We can hire help for her. I’m sure there are skilled people in Sapphire Falls who can look after your grandmother.”
“I’m sure there are, but they aren’t family.”
“We’ll visit more often.”
She wiped her cheek with the back of her hand. “It won’t be the same.”
Panic gripped his chest. “I’ll make certain you call her every night.”
She turned away from him and focused on the large tree in the backyard.
“I can’t stay with you.”
She didn’t respond, just stared out the window.
“I mean, I like Sapphire Falls and everything, but this is your home, not mine.” When she didn’t speak, he took her hands in his. “Anna, look at me.”
She slowly dragged her gaze away from the window and back to him.
“There’s nothing for me here. I have no friends, no job, nothing.”
“You have me,” she whispered.
He let go of her hands and stepped back. “Anna, please. Don’t do this.”
She settled her hands in her lap and averted her gaze. “I think—I think I’d like to be alone for a little while.”
“We’ll get through this, I promise.”
“Seth, please.” She stood, putting distance between them. “I just need a little time to think, you know?”
He shoved his hands in his pockets. “How long?”
She shrugged and turned to him. “I don’t know. A couple of hours, maybe.”
She was pulling away. He knew it as well as he knew the back of his hand. In her head, they had already broken up and she was moving in with her grandmother. His chest tightened and his mind froze with fear. Seth felt as if he were drowning and didn’t know how to pull himself to the surface.
“Okay,” he said. “I’ll give you some space and time to think. I have to check on the car anyway. I’ll head on over to talk to Dylan and then come back here for lunch.”
She nodded. “Thanks.”
“Hey.” He touched her arm and turned her so that she faced him. “Anna.” Hooking his finger under her chin, he lifted her head to meet his gaze. “I love you.” His voice cracked, and he knew that the words sounded more like a plea than a declaration. “It’s going to be okay. I promise.”
God, he felt as if he were dying inside. He didn’t want to lose her, but he wasn’t sure he could make the sacrifice she needed from him. Staying in Sapphire Falls would mean giving up his identity and his freedom. Anna would be spending most of her time split between the vet clinic and her grandmother. Where would that leave him? He’d be drifting in limbo, waiting for a few free seconds when she wasn’t too tired or too busy to give him attention. Back in the city he didn’t have a job, but he had a life. He had friends and his car. Here he’d have to give up the Saab for a more reliable vehicle. He wouldn’t be working on cars, or giving massages, or doing anything that gave him pleasure and made him who he was. He’d be trapped and alone, wasting away, waiting for the one woman he cared about to make time for him.
As long as you love her, everything else will work itself out.
Lucie’s words floated through his head, but were they true? If he knew for certain that Anna loved him, then he’d stay and try, but it seemed as if Anna had already made her decision. She was physically present, but her mind was somewhere else, with someone else. In desperation, he captured her lips, forcing her to ground herself in the moment with him. She kissed him back, but he felt it was a halfhearted effort. Not knowing what else to do, he pulled away.
“I’ll see you in a little bit.”
She nodded and walked out the back, toward the tree and the grave of her father. As Seth left through the front and made his way to the Sapphire Falls Auto Shop, he tried to push back the wave of helplessness threatening to wash over him.
Seth had no idea what to do, and had no one to talk to. What he needed was work. Doing something with his hands centered him and allowed him to think. Hopefully Dylan would have a car or two he could tinker with. Getting a little engine grease on his arms would most likely help him figure a way out of this mess. At the very least it would keep him from obsessing about Anna and how he could very well lose her for good.
Anna knelt in front of the small gravestone and ran her fingers over the inscription. The words ‘Frank Richards: father, son, friend’ didn’t seem to do justice to the man she remembered. Things had been difficult after her mother had left them, but there had been good times, too. Despite his drinking problem, he had been kind to her. He always tried his best to be both the mother and father she needed.
When he could no longer be there for her, her grandmother had stepped in. Throughout her entire life, Lucie had been her rock, her platform on which she could build her life. She felt like such a jerk for not calling or visiting more often. So many years wasted. So much time spent too wrapped up in her own problems to see what was going on right under her nose.
“I’m sorry, Dad. I should have been there for Grandma.”
“I’m not dead yet.”
Anna jerked back and turned to find Lucie frowning down at her. “Oh, I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be.” She waved her cane at the gravestone. “It’s about time he had more to look at than an old woman every morning.”
“I thought you were going to the sweet shop.”
Lucie smiled. “We started going there, but then Kendra pulled over and convinced me to go tomorrow instead. She thought that I might be needed here.”
Anna straightened and wiped the tears from her eyes. “I’m so sorry, Grandma. I had no idea you were so sick.” She hugged the old woman hard, as if she could squeeze forgiveness out of her.
Lucie made a low sound of dismissal. “And that was of my choosing, not yours. You needed to go live your own life and not be burdened with my problems.”
“But that’s what family’s for.”
“Pishposh. You speak as if I will expire in a matter of months.”
“You won’t?”
She smiled. “No, child. I’m afraid I have a lot of life left in these old bones.” She waved her cane toward the house. “Walk with me.”
Anna fell into step beside her grandmother. “When did it start?”
“The dementia? About a year after you left. I did my best to hide it—it was more important that you finish school than to take care of an old woman.”
“I never should have stayed in Chicago.”
“Nonsense. That was where your opportunities were. You had to stay.”
“I should have visited more, or called—”
“Stop beating yourself up. If I really wanted to talk, I would have called you, too. If I remember correctly, a phone works both ways.”
Anna chuckled. “You’re right.” She helped her grandmother up the steps to the porch. “I’ll stay now, though.”
“Why?”
“Because you need me.”
“I don’t need help.” Her grandmother tried to sit in the chair, but was having difficulty. Anna rushed to help her.
“Okay, maybe a little, but that’s why Kendra comes over.”
Anna sat down next to her. “Well, she won’t have to come over anymore.” She patted her grandmother’s leg. “I’m going to take care of you.”
Her grandmother frowned. “What about your practice?”
“I can relocate. Dr. Gustafson has already offered me a place at the vet clinic in town.”
Lucie nodded. “It would give him a chance to ease back. The business has been getting to be more than he can handle.” She offered a half smile. “I have to admit, having you around more would be nice.”
“We could catch up, and I could take you to that candy shop you like so much. It would give Kendra a little more free time.”
“I do like my sweets.” She winked at Anna. “That Adrianne sure makes good chocolate. You should try it.”
“Then we’ll go there. As often as you’d like.”
Her grandmother chuckled. “That’s sweet of you, but I don’t want to be a burden.”
“You won’t be, not at all. This actually works out perfectly. Things in Chicago were . . . not going as well as I had hoped. This will give me a chance to start over.”
Her grandmother winked. “Sapphire Falls got into your blood again, didn’t it? I knew it would.”
“It did,” Anna admitted. “I thought coming back here would just remind me of everything I had lost, but instead it fills me with hope.”
“I can’t argue with that. It’s something about the air out here. It’s good for the soul.”
Anna grinned. “I’m sure I will love getting reacquainted with everyone again. There are some people I recognize, like Tucker Bennett and Kendra, but so many new people.”
Her grandmother was silent for a moment, then lifted her head to meet Anna’s gaze. “Are you sure that there is nothing for you in the city?”
“No, of course not.”
“Not even a rugged boyfriend perhaps?” When Anna looked away, she continued. “Seth’s handsome. It’s easy to see he loves you, too. Have you talked to him about your decision?”
Anna pulled her fingers from her grandmother’s lap. “Yes, we did.”
“And?”
“And I don’t know, Grandma. He doesn’t think Sapphire Falls has anything to offer him. I’m afraid his heart lies in the city.”
Her grandmother leaned in and nudged her arm. “Any idiot can tell that his heart lies with you.” When Anna glanced at her, she nodded. “Think of it from his point of view. You have family here. You have history and know people. Why, Dr. Gustafson has even offered you a job! It must be intimidating for him to leave everything he knows and make roots somewhere with limited opportunities. He’d be giving up everything and starting over, with no guarantees as to how things will turn out.” She patted Anna’s lap. “Give the boy a little time. He’ll come to the right decision.”
Anna sighed. “I don’t know. I had always dreamed of how it would be when I fell in love. We’d get married, settle down, raise a family. I had no idea that things would be so difficult.”
“That’s your father talking.”
Anna gave her a sharp look. “What?”
“Your father thought the same way. The problem with him was he loved your mother for what she could give him, not for who she was.”
“I don’t understand.”
Her grandmother settled back in her chair. “I cherished your father with all my heart, but the man was as thick as one of the bales of hay in the Bennetts’ farm.” She shook her head. “He loved your mother’s pretty face and her famous potato salad. Most of all, he loved the way the other people in town looked at him when he was with her, as if he was somebody important.” She pressed her lips together for a moment, as if lost in some memory. “He had this vision of how their marriage should be. Your mother would stay home to raise you. She’d become involved with various town charities, and he would go to work. Your mother had other ideas.”
“She did?”
Her grandmother smiled. “Your mother was a free spirit.” She nodded. “I see a lot of that in you as well.” She let out a long breath. “Yes, Debbie had some of that gypsy blood in her. She wanted to see the world and experience everything. She didn’t want to be tied down to some small town, and she certainly didn’t want to wait around in the kitchen for your father to come home.”
Anna widened her eyes in shock. “I-I never knew.”
Her grandmother nodded. “People think that Debbie running off with that magician was what broke up the marriage, but the problems between them started well before that entertainer showed up in town. Your father didn’t appreciate your mother for who she was, and kept trying to change her into something she wasn’t.”
Anna nibbled her lower lip as she thought about her relationship with Seth. Ever since he had quit his job, she had been after him to find something respectable. First it was another job as a masseur, then it was getting his degree. When neither of those worked, she made him help her at the vet clinic, a job he hated.
Now in Sapphire Falls, what was she doing? A few hours ago in the kitchen she was pushing him away, punishing him because he wasn’t doing what she wanted him to do. Every day of their relationship she had been trying to change him into the boyfriend she thought she wanted, instead of letting him be the person he was meant to be. A hole opened up in Anna’s stomach as she realized how much damage she had done to their relationship. All this time she had thought it was Seth who had messed things up with his inability to find work. The problem wasn’t with Seth. It was with her.
“Good Lord, Grandma,” she said as she leaned back in her chair. “I really have made a mess of things, haven’t I?”
Her grandmother smiled and patted her leg. “Unfortunately, your father was too stubborn to see the error of his ways. It isn’t too late for you, Anna. You can change things with that boyfriend of yours, if that’s what you want.”
Of course it was what she wanted, but making things better with Seth would mean moving back to Chicago. Or entering a long-distance relationship. Neither option seemed appealing, but she realized now that she needed to compromise a little to make their relationship work. Hopefully Seth would be willing to meet her halfway.