I had stayed at Layla’s an extra night, just needing some girl time. My father had even felt well enough to drive himself into town and meet us for dinner. I was amazed at how well he was doing and began to wonder if I had been holding him back; smothering him in his sickness.

Whatever the change had been, I was glad he was feeling better and more like his old self. After dinner, my father had agreed to stay the night at Layla’s parents’ house and I would follow him home in the morning. He had been tuckered out by his first trip to anywhere but a doctor’s office in months and welcomed the invitation to stay.

Layla and I had gone out to the local bar to grab a few drinks and listen to some local country band sing about losing their dog and their pickup or some shit. I didn’t really care for the music, but the lead singer reminded me of Evan and so we stayed and watched.

Getting out with Layla had made me feel better and I realized how much I had missed and needed her. I was finally starting to come out of the shadows and it felt good. I knew now that I was ready to talk to Evan; to tell him my story. If he pitied me, I would have to deal with it, but something told me that he wouldn’t. I had simply not given him enough credit.

Shit, I’d apparently not given anyone much credit in the past four years. Layla had been right. I had been through something horrible, but I’d gotten myself out of it and I couldn’t let that psychopath steal any more of my future.

I slipped into the bathroom and saw that Evan had called again but it was way too loud to be able to hear his message. I sent him a text instead, telling him I was ready to talk.

I walked back to the bar to sit with Layla and ordered another beer.

“Well?” she asked, motioning toward my phone with her drink.

“I sent him a text and said I’m ready to talk.”

“Good,” she said and clanked her bottle to mine in a mock toast. “Now let’s get that ass out on the dance floor.”

I laughed and tucked my phone into my pocket as we headed out into the crowded bar. We raised our beers up and sang along to a Garth Brooks cover while we danced and laughed. It was the best time I’d had in a very long time. I was starting to feel normal again and it was amazing. And I had Evan to thank for it. He had been the key that had unlocked the door I’d been closed behind for far too long now.

I excused myself to check my messages, but when I flipped my screen on, there were none in my inbox. I checked to make sure the message I had sent him had been delivered. The phone indicated that not only had it been delivered but it had been opened. I looked down at the phone with a sinking feeling in my gut.

Layla came from across the room and put her hand on my arm. “What’s up?” she asked, looking over my shoulder at my phone.

I looked up at her as tears filled my eyes and, just like that, my fun-filled night crashed down around me. “I think I’m too late.”

Layla grabbed our coats and led me out of the bar and to her car. Once inside, she turned the heat on high and grabbed my phone from me. She flipped through my calls and messages and shook her head. “Maybe he just fell asleep?” she offered, trying to make me feel better.

I shook my head. “But he read the message, Layla.”

She looked at me with sympathetic eyes and drove us back to her place. We sat on her couch in our pjs and drained a bottle of wine. The alcohol was having the opposite effect to what I wanted, however, deepening my sorrows instead of drowning them. Layla tried putting on our favorite funny movie, but nothing was working. I was miserable.

Finally, I sent her to bed and curled up on the couch with the blanket pulled tightly up to my chin. My head hurt and I was bone weary. I realized that I hadn’t slept well at all since leaving Evan’s. In such a short amount of time, I’d gotten used to feeling his big body next to me. If I closed my eyes, I could almost feel him now. The heat the always emanated from him, the strength in his arms that circled around me, the tickle of his beard on my skin as he rested his head against me.

I couldn’t bear the thought that I might have just given that all up. I took a deep breath, turned over onto my side, and cried myself to sleep.