Chapter Twenty Six
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“Alex.” The trembling voice on the other end of the phone stopped him in his tracks. Alex hadn’t wanted to answer, knew what he was walking into the second he did.
“Jessie?” He didn’t need to ask, he knew exactly who it was because she had called him twice that morning when he’d been driving down to Austin and he’d ignored the calls. Maybe it was the fact that the last conversation he had with Jessie had gone fairly well, but this time he had a hunch it was not going to go as well.
Sitting at the table, staring across at the empty chair, waiting for Ashleigh to return from the restroom, Alex knew he should have ignored this one too. “What’s wrong?”
“He’s going to kill me.” She whispered, as though she were trying to hide from someone.
Instinct told him she wasn’t playing him. At least not at the moment. “Where are you?”
“At home.” He barely heard her. “Please help me.”
Alex caught sight of Ashleigh from across the room, and their eyes met. She must’ve seen the concern in his gaze because she hurried her movements until she was standing beside the table.
“What’s wrong?” She asked, not bothering to sit down.
“I’ll be there in a minute, Jessie. Stay right where you are.” He ordered before disconnecting the call. The look in Ashleigh’s eyes made him cringe.
“Where is she?” Surprising him with her question, he stood from his seat, tossing a fifty on the table to cover the bill before taking her hand and walking through the restaurant.
“Talk to me, Alex. What’s wrong with her?” Ashleigh demanded, pulling on his arm.
“She said he’s going to kill her.” He bit his lip, both frustrated at the situation and pissed off at himself for feeling as though he needed to go see for himself.
“Let’s go check on her.” Ashleigh said the words and Alex stopped short.
Looking down at her in utter disbelief, he waited for her to continue.
“You heard me. We can’t just stand here.”
She wanted to go with him? Had she lost her mind? This time she was the one on the move, and he fought to process the situation as he followed her out into the bright Texas sunshine.
“Ashleigh, wait.” He said, unsure of what he would say next.
“No. Let’s go. Once and for all, we’re going to get this woman some help.” Ashleigh sounded entirely too confident and just a little pissed off.
He opened the truck door for her, waiting until she climbed in before shutting it. Still stunned, he walked around the truck and climbed in the other side.
“What did she say?” Ashleigh asked as she buckled her seatbelt, staring at him. “Start the truck, Alex.”
Her instruction startled him into motion, reminding him where he was and what he was doing. For the next few minutes, they drove in silence, but he knew she was waiting for an answer.
“Ashleigh,” he said, glancing at her before turning back to the road, “I don’t know what I’m going to walk into. With Jessie, I never know.”
She didn’t say a word, but he could feel her gaze on him.
“Jessie needs help,” he finally said.
“I know.” Ashleigh sighed but continued. “I talked to Dylan.”
Great. Now his best friend was sharing his secrets. He couldn’t imagine what Ashleigh said when Dylan told her that Jessie had pulled Alex’s strings for the last ten years, calling on him constantly, sometimes truly needing him, others just wanting to get his attention. He didn’t know what she was pulling now, but he knew he couldn’t just turn a blind eye to her situation.
For the last two weeks, Jessie had been calling, trying to talk to him, but Alex hadn’t been interested in hearing from her. Even after she told him she was going to get on the straight and narrow, he knew she had been drinking again, and he knew that Jeff was coming around.
As much as he wanted to push her out of his life for good, he couldn’t sit by while his ex-wife continued to throw her life away.
“What did he tell you?”
Ashleigh flinched, but she turned toward him. “I know she has problems, Alex. I know she calls you at all hours.”
That she did. Alex had never tried to hide the calls from Ashleigh when he was with her, but he had wanted to. The thought of losing Ashleigh because Jessie was continuing to use him for whatever reason tore at him.
But, this was who he was. He couldn’t change the fact that he didn’t want to see Jessie hurt. Until recently, he hadn’t realized he wasn’t able to help her the way she needed. That had been a hard thing to swallow, but as the days passed, he knew he had to do something or things with Jessie would never change.
“Alex.” Her warm hand came down over his, and he briefly glanced down at it. “Let’s go see what she needs. We have to get her help. Real help.”
He knew what she was saying, but he couldn’t get past the “we”. His heart swelled, aching with the need to tell her everything he felt for her. The woman was so giving, never asking for anything in return and here he was, dragging her across town to check on his ex-wife, not knowing what they would actually find when they got there.
“Let’s just check on her.” Ashleigh said, sounding entirely too reasonable. “Then you can decide what the best thing to do for her is.”
“Why?” He couldn’t hold back his questions anymore. He felt like he were being set up and he was suddenly scared of what might happen. He couldn’t lose Ashleigh, but he couldn’t turn his back on Jessie. He had to live with the consequences. Either way.
“Why what?” She asked, pulling her hand from his.
“Why do you want to go?”
“Trust me, I don’t want to go.” She retorted, then took a deep breath, sighed again. “Dylan told me about your relationship with Jessie. Between what he said and what you’ve told me yourself, I think the woman needs help.”
She paused, then looked at him.
“Don’t get me wrong, Alex, I’m not willing to be her friend, and I’m not exactly thrilled about sharing you with her, but it’s clear you are concerned about her.”
He was. But not the way Ashleigh thought. Maybe now was the time to tell Ashleigh the full story.
“My dad died when I was twelve.” He said, keeping his hands firmly on the steering wheel. “For two years my mother sat around, depressed and lonely, until one day she met a man. Rick. She started dating him for a little while, and before I knew what happened, Rick was coming to the house. He’d stay the night once in a while, and I didn’t ask questions. My mother seemed so happy, and that was the most important thing to me.”
Ashleigh reached over, touching his arm and her touch seemed to calm him. Releasing one hand from the steering wheel, he laced his fingers with hers.
“As it turned out, Rick wasn’t all that nice. They would argue from time to time, but I tried to stay out of it, unsure what to do or say. Time passed and they kept seeing each other, but their relationship kept getting more and more unstable.” That was an understatement. “I was fifteen when he hit her for the first time.”
Ashleigh’s fingers squeezed his, but she didn’t say anything.
“I was bigger by then, not like I am now, but I wasn’t the scrawny little boy I had been when he started coming around. Long story short, Rick’s anger only continued to escalate and so did mine. I was so pissed at my mother for just sitting back and letting that bastard beat on her.” He paused to take a breath. The anger from those memories surged to the forefront.
“I came home from school one day to find him hitting her while she cowered on the floor. The rage set in, and the only thing I remember is pulling him off of her, so fucking pissed that she’d let him do that to her.
“Then he turned his anger on me, but I’d obviously been preparing for that day. Needless to say, by the time the cops showed up, they had to pull me off of him.” That was the easy part. “My relationship with my mother was never the same again. She didn’t forgive me for that, or for the fact that Rick didn’t come back around.” Alex hated that part, hated how his mother had put that man before her own son. “I can’t stand a man that hits a woman, and maybe I should just back off, leave Jessie to her own devices, but I can’t seem to do it.”
“You shouldn’t.” Ashleigh said after a few moments of silence. “I don’t fault you for caring, Alex. I just...” She didn’t continue, and Alex didn’t push her. They were pulling onto Jessie’s street, and he just wanted to get through the next few minutes because once they were done here, he had some more things he wanted to tell Ashleigh.
~~*~~
Ashleigh followed Alex up the driveway to the tiny little house. Her own curiosity had her glancing around, taking in the outside appearance. The neighborhood wasn’t fancy, but it was well kept, all of the small houses neatly maintained.
With the exception of Jessie’s.
The yard was... well, there was no yard, just brown, crispy grass, long since dead.
She returned her gaze forward, following Alex up the two small steps to the porch before he opened the front door and walked right in. He didn’t bother knocking.
Ashleigh was still reeling from Alex’s story, feeling as though she had been given a glance into his soul. She may not like the way he ran to Jessie’s rescue, but she couldn’t fault him for it. He was just that type of man, one any woman should be proud to be with. They just didn’t make them like Alex anymore.
“Jessie?” Alex called out as they stopped in the living room.
The house was a wreck. Empty bottles everywhere, food containers laying on every flat surface and it reeked to high heaven.
When Alex moved, Ashleigh followed. Jessie hadn’t answered when Alex called out to her, and a sudden nervous tension coursed through her. She may not like the woman, though she had never met her, but she hoped nothing was wrong. Well, other than the obvious. The woman had a problem.
Alex pushed open a door at the end of the hall, and Ashleigh stood at his side, unable to see into the room.
“Fuck!” Alex huffed. “Put your goddamn clothes on, Jessie.”
Turning away, he grabbed Ashleigh’s hand and pulled her alongside him.
“Wait! Alex, please.” Jessie called. “I need you. Please!”
Ashleigh pulled away, going back to the door and pushing it open with a rush. Before her was a very naked Jessie, sprawled out on her bed. Well! Apparently the woman needed Alex, but it had nothing to do with life or death.
“Who are you?” Jessie asked, sitting up in the bed, but not trying to cover herself.
Ashleigh stared at the emaciated woman. Jessie had to be in her mid-thirties, based on the math Ashleigh had done in her head, but she looked closer to fifty. Time definitely hadn’t been good to the woman. Or maybe it was the drugs and alcohol.
“Get dressed.” Ashleigh couldn’t believe the anger that had grown to the size of a beach ball in her chest. “Now.”
Slamming the door behind her, she walked back to the living room where Alex was standing.
“We should go.” He told her when she walked into the room.
They should, she agreed. But that wasn’t going to fix this little problem. “Not until you talk to her.”
“I don’t want to fucking talk to her, Ashleigh. You saw what this is about. I don’t have time for this shit.”
No one did, Ashleigh knew. “She needs your help.”
“I can’t fix that.” Alex said, his green eyes sparkling with fury.
Before Ashleigh could say another word, Jessie joined them, at least moderately decent with an oversized t-shirt and shorts on.
“Sit the fuck down.” Alex barked at Jessie.
Looking both pissed and a little remorseful, Jessie did as Alex told her.
“What the hell is wrong with you, Jessie?” His anger was a living, breathing thing and Ashleigh knew he needed to calm down before this situation escalated.
“Nothing.” Jessie cooed. “I just wanted to see you.”
Ashleigh watched in wide eyed wonder as the woman stared at Alex like he was a lollipop and she was craving sugar. It was almost as though she had no idea Ashleigh was standing right there, although they’d been inadvertently introduced not one minute before.
“Jessie,” Alex said, thrusting his hand through his hair, “I can’t keep doing this.”
He sounded defeated, and Ashleigh felt sorry for him in that moment. Maybe there was more to this situation than she had originally given him credit for. He didn’t look any happier about being there than Ashleigh was. But, since they were there, it was time they get some things straight.
“You don’t have time for me anymore.” Jessie whispered. “I just miss you.”
Alex groaned, turning his back on her like he couldn’t stand to look at her another second. Ashleigh didn’t know what to say, but she was getting more and more uncomfortable with every passing second.
“Does anyone need a drink?” Jessie asked, sounding bubbly and cheerful, the complete opposite of just a few seconds ago. Ashleigh was going to have a headache just trying to keep up with the woman’s personality changes.
“Don’t you fucking move.” Alex stated adamantly, turning back to face Jessie, but then looking over at Ashleigh. “We should go.”
Ashleigh couldn’t have come up with a better plan, but she knew they had to get this settled, or he would never be at peace. For the last few months, they’d been tiptoeing around the phone calls that went unanswered and now that they were presented with the opportunity to do something to fix it, she wanted to jump on it. If they didn’t, she feared this woman, and her destructive need, was going to come between them. Something Ashleigh wasn’t willing to let happen.
“Jessie,” Ashleigh turned to the woman, suddenly more determined than ever, “what do you need from Alex?”
That surprised Alex as much as it did the woman sitting on the couch.
“What do you mean?” She sounded sincerely confused.
“Why do you keep calling him?” Ashleigh asked, realizing she was totally ill equipped to handle a situation like this.
“Because he loves me.” She said, making direct eye contact with Ashleigh.
“He’s your friend.” Ashleigh confirmed. “But you can’t keep doing this to him.” Or yourself. She kept that last part to herself.
“Doing what?”
“Jessie,” Alex interrupted, his patience obviously worn thin. “I don’t know how to fix this.”
“There’s nothing to fix.” Jessie said with a huff. “I just want to see you. I want...”
Ashleigh hung on the woman’s every word, waiting to hear what it was she wanted. Or rather what she thought she wanted.
“I want you to take me back.” Jessie finally said, looking down at her feet. “I need you.”
Alex shot her a look, and Ashleigh saw the apology in his eyes.
“Have you been drinking again?” He asked, not moving.
“Yes, I’ve been drinking.” Jessie yelled, standing up immediately. “It’s the only thing that makes me feel better.”
Ashleigh wasn’t sure how this made her feel better. The stench of alcohol and old food filled the air, singeing her nostrils and making her want to vomit. How Jessie could live like this, day in and day out was shocking.
“Do you want to push Alex away?” Ashleigh asked, deciding they were getting nowhere and she felt entirely too awkward being there. She should have never asked to come along because it was obvious there was nothing that she could contribute.
“Are you deaf?” Jessie blurted, turning to face Ashleigh.
“No, I’m not.” Ashleigh held her ground. “But I know what you’re doing to him. Your frequent phone calls. Have you not noticed he doesn’t answer the phone?”
“That’s just because you’re there. If he was alone, he’d answer my calls. He always does.”
Ashleigh wasn’t so sure anymore.
“You need to go back to rehab.” Alex stated, coming to stand beside Ashleigh, putting his arm around her. The warmth of his body, his apparent need to hold her close was comforting.
“Fuck you.” Jessie screamed, turning vicious. “She’s turning you against me. The fucking bitch –”
“Don’t.” Alex’s stern tone had Jessie flinching.
Ashleigh put a hand on Alex’s arm and took a step closer to Jessie. “He’s your friend, you know that, right? He cares about you. Even I know that.” She did. “But you’re tearing him apart, Jessie. Do you really want to do that to your friend?”
“He’s my husband.” She argued.
“No.” Ashleigh said defensively. “He’s not your husband. He was at one time, but not anymore.” Taking another step closer, Ashleigh continued. “If you want him to be your friend, you’ve got to get some help. Like today.”
“I don’t want him to be my friend. I want him to be my husband.” Jessie clenched her hands into fists. “That means you need to leave.”
“It’s not going to happen.” Alex said, inserting himself between the two women. “I love her, Jessie.”
Ashleigh’s heart seized. He what?
“I’ve always loved her.” Alex continued. “I don’t want to choose between being your friend, and being with her because I will choose her, Jessie. Do you hear what I’m telling you? There is nothing that you can say or do that will get me to love you that way. I care about you. I’ll always care about you, but I can’t keep doing this.”
Jessie sobbed, the sudden look of sheer disbelief contorting her sickly features. The woman was too thin and based on the state of their surroundings she probably wasn’t getting much nourishment. Unless of course the various types of liquor she consumed had enough calories to sustain life.
Alex took a step closer to Jessie, tilting her chin up so she had to look at him. “Go to rehab. For me.” He paused. “Please.”
Ashleigh watched as Jessie seemed to crumble at his feet, but she never actually moved. Whatever she felt for Alex, whether it was based on true love, or just a deep need to be loved, Jessie was giving in to his plea.
~~*~~
“I’m sorry you had to be here.” Alex said as they walked out to his truck. For the last two hours, they’d seen multiple sides of Jessie, ranging from hurt to rage and varying degrees in between.
At least she was going to get the help she needed. The help he never could give her. No matter how many times she’d said she would stop drinking, he knew she needed the professional help he couldn’t provide. This would be her second stint in rehab, and thanks to his brief conversation with one of the counselors, he now knew how to help his friend.
“I’m not.” Ashleigh told him, leaning into him. “I’m sorry she’s sick.”
And that’s what the counselor had told them. Alcoholism was a disease; one Jessie had no fighting chance of overcoming on her own.
“Do you want me to take you home?” He asked, realizing their day had been thrown so far off course, Alex wasn’t sure it would get back on track at that point.
“Sure.” She answered, sounding unsure.
And that’s what Alex did. He drove Ashleigh home, dropping her off and feeling at a total loss without her with him. Instead of coming in, he stayed in his truck. His emotions were all over the place, and it didn’t get past him that he had admitted how he felt about Ashleigh, and she’d never said a word about it.