Chapter Five
THREE DAYS LATER, SCOTT GOT his wires off, and the surgeon declared the fracture had knit well and was on its way to healing.
“You can add back in soft foods like noodles, Jell-O, and pudding, anything you can basically slurp,” he instructed. “No hard chewing just yet, especially until the muscles are stronger.”
Rylan watched in concern as Scott pinched the bridge of his nose, opening and closing his mouth a few times, a hiss escaping.
“Yes, jaw muscles can atrophy,” Dr. Rojas said, “but it shouldn’t take too long to regain your full range of motion. Just take it easy, and if the pain becomes too severe, call the office right away. Otherwise, I’ll see you in a month to check on your progress.”
On the way home, Rylan glanced at Scott in concern before turning his attention back to the road. “You okay?”
“Yeah.” Scott rubbed his palm over the lower half of his face. “It just freaked me out when he cut the wires off and I couldn’t open my mouth at first. I thought I was frozen like that forever.” He chuckled, but it sounded bleak, with a tinge of defeat that made Rylan’s chest ache.
“One step at a time, okay?” he said gently. “Face is healed, wires off, and you’re on your way back to being good as new.”
Scott shrugged, and then he brightened. “He said noodles, right?” When Rylan nodded, he rubbed his hands together enthusiastically. “Know where Spaghetti Factory is?”
After a leisurely dinner of slurped noodles and a few glasses of wine, they went back to the condo and sprawled out on the couch to watch a movie. Rylan was startled when his phone suddenly chimed from the coffee table, and he snatched it up, squinting at the incoming text.
“What is it?” Scott paused the movie and stretched, a few vertebrae audibly popping in his back.
“Jaxon.” Rylan turned the screen around for Scott to see. “Texting me the score of his basketball game earlier tonight. He plays starting forward for Pace High.”
Scott lifted his head from the couch cushion to read the text from his eldest half-brother. Hey, Ry! Your little bro is a hero! 108-107! My 3-pointer with 2 seconds left clinched the win! He lay back again. “Wow, that’s awesome. Good for him.”
When he didn’t say anything else, Rylan said softly, “Penny for your thoughts.”
Scott rolled his head to look at him. “You, uh, you have any more pictures of the kids you can show me?” His voice was tentative.
“I have albums and albums of them. Would you like to see?”
“Yeah, I would.”
Rylan rose from the couch and snagged his laptop from its charger in the kitchen. When he returned, Scott had the TV turned off and was sitting up straight, his face full of anticipation mixed with something Rylan couldn’t identify. He sat next to him, and they settled back, their shoulders touching.
“I’ll queue up my cloud and put them in a slideshow,” he said. “You want me to filter the ones with Heather out?”
“No. I want to see them all.”
With a few clicks, Rylan started the slideshow. “I have them in chronological order, okay?”
“Okay.”
Rylan watched Scott as he stared at the computer, his face lit up by the glow of the screen. At first, his lips were pressed tightly together, a muscle ticking in his jaw, but his expression eased a little as the pictures scrolled by.
Scott clicked the touchpad to pause the show. “It helps to see that they’re so happy, so well cared for.” He turned a questioning glance on Rylan. “You said you wouldn’t filter the ones of Heather out, but so far there aren’t any.”
“Those come later. That first year, well, I didn’t feel much like taking pictures of anything. Things were—not good.”
An anguished look flitted over Scott’s face. “I’m sorry,” he said, his voice barely audible, and Rylan reached over and put his hand on Scott’s thigh.
“I know. And it wasn’t just because of you. Heather was a train wreck no matter how you look at it. My dad wasn’t equipped to handle a ready-made family with so much baggage attached to it. I—” He blinked back the sudden tears that sprang to his eyes.
“You were left juggling all the pieces.” Scott threaded their fingers together. “Because I left you alone to deal with everything.” He gestured at the computer screen with his free hand. “But look at them. You did an amazing job, Rylan. You’re amazing.”
Rylan blotted his eyes with the back of his wrist. “Don’t give me all the credit. I wasn’t alone, Scott. I had Donna and Gabriel. My dad.” He fingered the scar at his cheek. “Yeah, things got messy and ugly for a while, but we all got through it.”
“Because you stick things out and don’t run like a coward.”
Before Rylan could answer, Scott went on, “You think the boys would like to hear from me?” His voice held a thread of defensiveness, as if he was afraid of the answer.
Rylan squeezed his leg. “I think they’d love it,” he answered truthfully. “They missed you terribly.”
Scott slumped, the defensiveness draining away as quickly as it had appeared. “I used to wonder if anyone even noticed I was gone, or if it was just one big relief.”
“No one was relieved, Scott. The boys cried themselves to sleep every night. I was obsessed with finding you.”
Scott glanced at him. “You—looked for me?”
“My dad and I spent weeks trying to find you, but there was only so much we could do since the police refused to get involved.” He told Scott about confronting Tanner and the bus station clerk.
Scott gave a disgusted snort. “I never went to the fuckin’ bus station. Did Joel”—he spat the name—“tell you that?”
“Yes.”
Scott pushed away from him and stood, clasping his hands behind his neck as he began to pace. “Lyin’ son of a bitch.”
“What happened with him? Will you tell me?”
Scott stopped pacing, his face hard as granite. “He abandoned me at a truck stop in Texas a week after I left with him.”
“What?” Rylan gasped, covering his mouth. “Abandoned you? Why? You said you were going to California with him!”
Scott’s lips twisted. “He said he would drive me to California so I could model, get parts in movies. I was gonna work for his sister in exchange for room and board.”
Rylan could only sit there, eyes wide.
“Told him upfront I didn’t have no money for the trip, and he said we could work somethin’ out.” Scott’s accent was thickening, the words sounding guttural. “I was proud of the money I took from you that night, Rylan, ’cause I thought that meant I could pay my own way. Two hundred bucks seemed like a fuckin’ fortune to me, a dude who ain’t never had more than ten bucks in his pocket before.”
He started pacing again.
“Well, a few tanks of gas, a few days’ worth of meals, and of course it was gone. I was worried, but he gently reminded me I had other options for payin’ my way.” His voice grew flat. “So…yeah. He fucked me every chance he got.”
“Jesus.”
Scott gave a harsh laugh. “It wasn’t bad. I was young, horny, and what we were doin’ felt real good. It wasn’t rape, Rylan. He never forced me.”
“He may not have forced you,” Rylan said, fighting to suppress the fury bubbling through him, “but he was taking advantage of you, keeping you vulnerable and giving you no choice but to have sex with him in order to survive. That’s coercion.”
Scott shrugged, but his eyes held an emptiness that tore at Rylan’s insides. “Right before we got to the truck stop, he got a phone call from some woman. I could tell he was upset, and he kept sayin’ stuff about a funeral up in Idaho. I guess he thought I was asleep, ’cause I heard him whisper ‘I love you, baby,’ and ‘I’m in Texas, but I’ll be there as soon as I can.’”
He clenched his fists. “At the truck stop, he pulled up to a gas pump and gave me twenty dollars to go in and get us some snacks, said we’d really need to bust our asses gettin’ to California because somethin’ just came up. I didn’t wanna get out of the car, but I—I did. So fuckin’ stupid. I didn’t even get inside the little store before he took off.”
He didn’t resist when Rylan grabbed his hand, pulling him down to sit next to him on the couch, where he stared unseeing at the floor.
“I stood there on the sidewalk and watched his taillights disappear. He left me, Rylan, a thousand miles from home. Just—left me by the side of the road like an unwanted puppy.”
Rylan put his hand on his back. “What did you do?”
Scott blew out a breath, looking stricken. “Ry, I can’t—I—”
“Shhh.” Rylan slid his hand up to rest it on the nape of Scott’s neck, his thumb moving in soothing circles. “You don’t have to talk about it.” He studied him for a moment. “But at least tell me why you didn’t call somebody. Why didn’t you call us for help?”
He could hear the anguish in his own voice, and Scott’s face crumpled for a moment before he firmed his lips. “’Cause I didn’t want everyone to know what an epic fuckup I was. The way I saw it, I got myself into that mess, I had to get myself out.”
“But—”
“Such a stupid kid. Such a weak-ass stupid kid.” His shoulders were bunched and tense. “You can’t tell me Heather wasn’t goin’ around sayin’ I’d come crawlin’ back after I failed at whatever it was I was tryin’ to do.”
Rylan’s silence said what he couldn’t.
“Don’t you see? Provin’ her right was worse than anythin’ else I thought I was facin’, Ry. To come crawlin’ back there after all the shit she said about me bein’—bein’ worthless—” He choked up, pushing Rylan away when he tried to wrap his arms around him, so Rylan slid off the couch to sit on the floor at Scott’s feet.
“Don’t shut me out, Scott.” He leaned his head against his knee, giving Scott the privacy he needed but unwilling to break physical contact. “I’m on your side, remember? Let me be your friend.”
For long moments, all Rylan could hear was Scott’s ragged breathing as he fought with his demons. Finally, a sigh, and Scott combed his fingers gently through Rylan’s hair. “You’re the best friend I ever had.”
Rylan stroked Scott’s bare foot with his thumb. “What do you need? Talk to me.”
Scott kissed the top of his head, urging him up from the floor. “Come back up here. Let me hold you for a while.” He pulled Rylan into his arms, almost clutching at him. Rylan put his head on Scott’s shoulder, resting his hand on Scott’s stomach.
Scott caressed Rylan’s hip, the light brush of his fingertips making Rylan shiver.
“Will you show me some more pictures?” Scott asked, his voice calm and even. “I really want to see you being all wild and sexy in Miami.” He reached down and gave Rylan’s ass a pinch.
Rylan chuckled, sitting up and again reaching for his laptop. “I don’t know about the sexy part, but the wild part? Nailed it.”
As the slideshow scrolled by, Rylan enjoyed Scott’s choked exclamations at what he was seeing.
“You did drag?”
Rylan smirked. “You know me, I always did enjoy looking fabulous.”
“You’re fucking gorgeous. Damn.”
Rylan had to admit, he did look pretty good with a face full of makeup. “It got me lots of attention, and that point, pretty much all I wanted to do was fuck my way through life.”
“Looks like you succeeded.”
Scott’s voice was dry, yet with a faint note of jealousy that sent a pleasurable tingle skittering down Rylan’s spine. “It got old after a while. Anonymous sex, waking up in strange beds, sometimes with more than one guy. Basically I grew out of it.”
He manipulated the touchpad until he found a picture he wanted, and he felt a sense of wistfulness stealing over him as it filled the screen.
“My first serious boyfriend.” Felipe was sprawled naked in bed, a sheet strategically pooled to preserve his modesty, but there was still plenty of skin on display. His brown eyes were sleepy and affectionate, a little smile quirking his lips as he gazed up at the camera.
Scott studied the photo, his face unreadable. “That’s the guy who broke up with you when you moved here?”
Rylan nodded, and Scott made a sound of disgust. “Fucking idiot.”
He set the laptop aside and pushed Rylan to his back on the couch, coming down over top of him. Rylan draped his arms around Scott’s neck, looking up at him questioningly.
“You, uh, you said once that you being here was only temporary.”
Rylan lifted one knee and rubbed it along Scott’s side, enjoying the way he bit his lip and rocked lightly against him. “I never intended to make Phoenix my home.” He spread his legs wider and let Scott settle more firmly between them. “I always thought I’d get my project done and move on.”
“Back to him?”
Rylan nuzzled his nose against Scott’s cheek. “No, that’s over. To wherever my career led me next.” He placed a line of kisses along Scott’s jaw, and Scott tilted his head back, giving Rylan access to his throat.
“And where would that be?” Scott’s voice was hoarse, and Rylan could feel him hardening against him.
“Mmm. I don’t know,” he admitted, running his hands down Scott’s back to cup his ass. “I’ve been an arrogant little fuck, not wanting to pay my dues as a stringer.” Scott looked mystified, and Rylan went on. “Someone who gets paid by the assignment whenever a news agency calls. There’s no job security, and you have to be willing to do anything on a moment’s notice.”
“Sounds like it would suck.”
“It’s a good way to build relationships with various news organizations who use stringers when their staff photographers can’t get somewhere quickly. Or when it’s something no one else wants to do.” He gave a rueful half shrug. “I decided not to go that route, and now here I am with a stalled project, no contacts or network.”
“Well, you’re fucking wasted at Spectrum, taking pictures of parties and drunken idiots.”
“I’m enjoying it, and it pays the bills…for now. But you’re right. I won’t be satisfied with that forever.”
“So what would you do, if you could do anything? What’s your dream?”
Rylan spread his palm over Scott’s chest, moving it in ever-widening circles, letting his pinkie graze a nipple through his shirt. Goose bumps pebbled Scott’s skin as the little bud stiffened, and Rylan couldn’t resist lifting his head up for a quick taste.
“Mmm. Besides spending as much time as possible in bed with you?”
Scott flicked him on the nose. “I’m being serious.”
Rylan stopped teasing him for a moment, contemplating the question. “I’ve always felt safe behind my camera,” he said at last. “Sometimes if things feel overwhelming, being behind the lens takes me outside myself, helps me forget my problems, puts them in perspective.”
“You helped me the other night.” Scott brushed a lock of hair off Rylan’s forehead. “By giving me the boost of confidence I needed to go out, get back to the club.”
“I love being a part of stuff like that, privy to people’s innermost thoughts, those intimate moments they share with me.” Rylan sighed. “I don’t exactly know how to parlay all that into a career, though.”
“Your project?”
Rylan winced, thinking about the last couple of times he’d tried to find and talk to Maya, being rebuffed at every turn. “That’s pretty much fizzled out,” he admitted. “I think I’m going to have to go the stringer route. Although—”
“What?” Scott tickled his ribs when Rylan didn’t answer right away, chuckling when Rylan flailed. “Tell me.”
“I’ve been talking to Chris about it a lot.”
Scott immediately stiffened at the mention of the name, and his fingers dug painfully into Rylan’s side for a moment, making him squeak. “Sorry,” he muttered, sounding anything but. “What does—Chris say?”
Rylan snuggled closer, trying to ignore how tense he was. What was it about Chris that put his back up so much?
“I think I told you he’s on R&R right now after an assignment in Libya. He’s also been to Iraq, Afghanistan, Cuba…his conflict photos are incredible, Scott. The sense of purpose, the witness to history.” Rylan remembered the awe he felt looking through Chris’s portfolio. “I want that.”
Scott pushed off Rylan and sat up. “To go to a fucking war zone?” His tone was a mixture of anger and incredulousness. “You don’t have any experience traveling outside the US, much less to a goddamn war zone, do you?”
Rylan petted him soothingly, running his hand up and down Scott’s arm. “No. And that’s why Chris invited me to go to Africa with him when he leaves next.” He braced himself for the detonation, which wasn’t long in coming.
“What the fuck?” Scott exploded up off the couch with a snarl. “You’re going to Africa with Chris?”
“I’m considering it,” Rylan said honestly. “It’d be an awesome opportunity to travel with someone experienced, someone who can show me the ropes and be sort of a mentor.”
“A mentor who wants to get in your pants,” Scott sneered, and Rylan held up his hands.
“It’s not about that at all,” he protested. “He’s actually seen my work, and he thinks I have potential as a photojournalist, Scott. Do you have any idea what that means to me, coming from someone like him? He’s had pictures featured in the New York Times, Vanity Fair. To have him take me under his wing…”
Scott scrubbed his hands over his face, slumping a little.
“The sex part was just for fun, you know?” Rylan went on. “We like each other, but that’s not what this is about. Out in the field, it’d be professional. I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
He got up from the couch and went over to Scott, sliding his arms around his waist. “Why does this upset you? Is it Chris, or the fact I’d be leaving?”
Scott shrugged, holding himself rigid for a second before returning Rylan’s embrace, burying his face in his hair. “Obviously I don’t want you to put yourself in any danger, but shit, Rylan, of course I want you to follow your dreams.” He snorted. “Chris bugs me, only because he’s everything I’m not.”
“What do you mean?”
Scott let go of him and threw himself back to sitting. “You know. He’s educated, worldly, well-traveled. You have tons of things in common.”
“That’s all true.” Rylan perched next to him. “He’s an awesome guy.” Scott made a sour face, and Rylan went on. “But I don’t have any history with him, or think about him all the time.”
“Yeah?” Scott mulled that over.
Rylan smiled. “Yeah. Or want to talk to him for hours, kiss him for hours.” He punctuated that with an exaggerated smack to Scott’s lips, delighting in his laugh.
They stared at each other for a moment before Rylan reached out and cupped Scott’s cheek. “I don’t ache to know every single thing about him, or want to tell him everything about me.” He nudged Scott to his back before straddling his hips in one smooth motion. Scott caught his breath and settled his hands lightly at Rylan’s waist.
“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be right now.” Rylan traced his thumb across Scott’s parted lips. “Nowhere.”
Scott jackknifed up and threaded his fingers through Rylan’s hair, taking his mouth in a hot rush. Their tongues dueled as Scott kissed him deeply, thoroughly, until Rylan was gasping for air, clutching at Scott’s shoulders.
Scott collapsed back onto the cushions, roaming his hands over Rylan’s torso, delving them beneath his T-shirt to pinch his nipples. Rylan groaned, arching his back against the pleasure, and Scott hissed. “Yes. So fucking beautiful. My beautiful Ry.”
Rylan felt a sudden wave of self-consciousness sweep over him. Beautiful? With his narrow chest, skinny arms and legs, the zit on his forehead? He resisted the urge to protest, to hide, to turn the light off…
Scott was looking up at him, lips swollen, eyes heavy-lidded and glowing with heat, his cock rock-hard against him. Rylan gave a little wiggle, enjoying Scott’s sharp intake of breath, the very tangible evidence of his desire. This is all for me, Rylan exulted, letting his hands do a little wandering of their own over Scott’s broad shoulders, down his arms. And he thinks I’m beautiful.
Rylan relaxed, circling his hips again, gracing Scott with a sultry smile.
“God, yes.” Scott settled back and crossed his arms behind his head. “Ride me. Give me a show.”
Rylan stripped his shirt off and opened his pants, licking his palm before sliding it down his chest and belly to take his cock in a loose grip. He jacked himself leisurely, base to tip, rubbing his thumb over the head of his dick, feeling the slickness of precome. He spread it around in sensual circles, biting his lip at the intensity of the pleasure.
“That’s it,” Scott breathed. “So hot. More.”
Rylan thrust into his fist, teasing himself. He lifted up on his knees, reaching down to fondle his balls, pressing down on that strip of skin just behind them with a fingertip. He moaned.
Scott gave a muffled curse, his eyes fixed on what Rylan was doing. Rylan couldn’t ever remember feeling so sexy, so abandoned, and he whispered Scott’s name, waiting until he looked up at him.
“What do you want? You want me to come all over you? Fuck you with this?” He squeezed the tip with rough fingers, bringing up more fluid, which dripped down onto Scott’s belly.
Scott licked his lips. “Get up here and fuck my mouth with it. I want to taste you.”
Rylan groaned, standing to strip his jeans and underwear off before straddling Scott’s upturned face. He rubbed his sac across Scott’s parted lips, feeling the hot dampness as Scott chased it with his tongue.
“Suck them,” Rylan ordered, using one hand to hold his dick back against his abs, hissing as Scott nuzzled the sensitive skin of his balls before taking them one by one inside his mouth. “God, yes.”
Scott let go of him with a pop and arched his neck back invitingly. “Feed it to me.”
Rylan stood higher on his knees, taking hold of himself and rubbing the tip against Scott’s lips, making them glisten with his moisture. “Jesus,” he grated. “Sexiest thing I’ve ever seen.”
Scott lapped eagerly at him, stabbing into the slit, moaning as Rylan released another burst of his flavor onto his tongue. “Tastes so good, Ry. So fucking good.”
He sucked on the head, gripping Rylan’s hip with one hand and trying to force him deeper. Mindful of Scott’s healing jaw, Rylan kept his thrusts into his mouth shallow, ignoring Scott’s growls to fuck him.
“Take what I give you,” Rylan murmured, bracing one hand on the back of the couch and gritting his teeth at the sight of his cock sliding along Scott’s tongue and between those full, sinful lips.
Scott released him and mouthed along the shaft down to Rylan’s heavy balls. Rylan groaned, a sharp cry ripping from his throat as Scott suddenly turned his head and bit down on Rylan’s inner thigh, sucking up a bruise.
“Mine,” Scott muttered, licking at the darkening mark. “Mine.”
Rylan trembled from the overload of sensation, his breath coming in sharp pants. Scott’s hands seemed to be everywhere, roaming over Rylan’s torso, flicking his nipples, squeezing his ass, and fondling his balls, his lips and tongue tormenting the aching, swollen tip of his dick.
Scott’s growls of appreciation shot to every erogenous zone Rylan possessed, and he gripped the cushion so tightly his knuckles whitened, barely able to gasp out a warning right before he came hard.
He threw his head back, his teeth bared as the pleasure consumed him from the inside out, the wrenching spasms making his whole body shake. His moans and cries rang off the ceiling, his balls emptying in seemingly endless spurts.
As the orgasm crested and receded, Rylan managed to drag his eyes open and look down, the words of praise and affection dying on his lips as he gasped in shock. Scott’s face was drenched in what appeared to be gallons of spunk, so much that there were clumps of it in his hair. One of his nostrils was plugged, and a great white glob threatened to slide from his forehead right down into his eye.
Rylan wiped it hastily away, choking on his horrified laughter.
Scott blinked up at him. “When I told you earlier I needed a facial,” he said drily, “this isn’t quite what I had in mind.”
Rylan used his thumb to try to clear Scott’s nose. “Oh my God, I’m sorry,” he wheezed. “I was so worked up, and that totally took me by surprise.”
Scott blew semen out of his nostril, grimacing as the mess landed on his lower lip. He brushed it away, muttering, “This seems way sexier in porn, doesn’t it?”
Quivering with laughter, Rylan buried his face in Scott’s neck. “Yeah, you look an absolute mess.” He peeked up at him. “But if this was porn, I’d be licking it off your face and feeding it to you.”
“Eww,” they both said in unison, and Scott wrapped him up in his arms as they gave in to their mirth.
“While we’re being honest about real life versus porn,” Scott gasped, “I gotta say your jizz tastes terrible, Ry.”
“What?”
Scott snorted at the outrage in Rylan’s tone. “Yeah, you need to eat more fruit or something, darlin’.” He gave a mock shudder, laughing when Rylan punched him on the shoulder.
“You’re such an asshole.”
They cuddled together until Rylan ran his hand through Scott’s stiffening hair. “Let’s get you cleaned up, porn king.”
In the shower, Rylan goofed off with the bodywash, making a bubble beard on Scott’s chin and attempting some horns on his head, exclaiming in renewed horror when the little mounds of lather suddenly slid down and got in his eyes.
“Okay, from now on, you stay away from my face, Rylan Mahoney,” Scott sputtered, rinsing off with frantic motions under the spray. “Don’t you know it’s my fortune? Ask anyone.” He struck a ridiculous pose, batting his eyelashes, his eyes reddened and watery-looking.
Rylan blew him a kiss in silent apology, leering at him. “But you looked so hot with my load all over your face. Wanna do it again.”
Scott grabbed him and hauled him close, nuzzling Rylan’s cheek with his nose. “Whenever you want, baby. Whenever you want.”
Rylan wrapped his arms around Scott’s neck and kissed him, noticing instantly that the motions of his tongue were smaller, more hesitant, and he wasn’t ravaging Rylan’s mouth like he had earlier. “You hurting?”
Scott started to shake his head in denial before giving a rueful nod. “Yeah, a little.”
“Come on.”
Rylan shut off the water and passed Scott a towel, tying his own towel around his hips as he padded into the kitchen to grab some water and Tylenol.
Scott was already ensconced in bed, and Rylan handed him the water and pills, waiting silently until Scott swallowed them before climbing in next to him and snuggling close. Scott laid his head on Rylan’s shoulder, and Rylan caressed his damp hair gently until they both drifted to sleep.