I couldn’t believe I'd blurted it out. Ryan was frozen above me.

“Say something,” I pleaded.

“What the hell do you want me to say, Luce?”

He lifted himself off me, and I panicked. Not again!

“Don’t do this to me again, Ryan.” I was near tears, like a sex-craving minx that needed a fix. But I was beyond caring. He couldn’t get me all worked up and leave me hanging.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes! I’m positive. Please, don’t stop, Ryan. I want you to be my first.” I needed him to be. Male satisfaction gleamed in his eyes. Yes!

He groaned, and a smile tugged at his lips. "I want to be your first too.” My heart flipped. “We’ll take it slow,” he promised and stroked his fingers over my face, pushing back my hair.

“Okay, I trust you.” I trusted him completely. He was the one I had been saving myself for, but never thought it would actually happen.

“Hold on to me. Wrap your arms around my neck," Ryan said as he trailed his hand down my side.

I did as I was told while he kissed me. He grasped his cock and nestled it between us. The broad tip of his cock pushed at my entrance. I wondered if he would fit. I saw why women went crazy over him. The man was hung. I didn’t get time to analyze my jealousy at the thought of Ryan with other women because he surged forward, breaching my entrance.

I stiffened, my fingernails digging into his arms. He stopped, allowed me to adjust to his invasion, and I could tell it took a great effort for him to stay in control. He soothed me with kisses, and we gazed at each other. I fell deeper in love with him at that moment. The sharp pain turned to an uncomfortable fullness.

“Are you alright?” he whispered, as sweat beaded his brow.

I nodded. “You don’t have to hold back, Ryan. I know you won’t hurt me.”

With a moan, he began to move. The discomfort soon turned into a pleasure I didn’t even know existed. His large hands encouraged my legs to wrap around his waist, and my hips tilted allowing him to go deeper. He touched places inside of me I never knew I had. Each thrust took me higher toward ecstasy.

“Ryan, more.” His pace increased, along with the friction.

“Lucy…”

Our moans grew louder. I was about to explode. Pleasure, wonder, amazement, everything swamped me at once. I closed my eyes afraid of what he would see in their depths. I loved him. And I didn’t want to scare him off. I knew he would never feel the same way about me.

“Open your eyes, Lucy. I want to see everything when you come apart.”

Reluctantly, my lids lifted and I met his gaze.

I was left breathless. The emotions in his eyes mimicked mine, wonder, amazement, pleasure. There was clear desire, but I couldn’t identify love. My heart sank, yet lifted simultaneously as my orgasm hit me like a tidal wave. My eyes widened, and my lips parted on a gasp.

“Ryan, I’m going to—” I didn’t even recognize the keening moan as my own. With a roar, he followed me over the edge. His body shuddered above mine. Our ragged breathing mingled.

I began to drift, my body lax, fully satisfied. I was aware of Ryan moving, holding me, but I remained lost in a haze. My orgasm was so intense; I nearly curled up in a ball to rock back and forth. No man would ever make me feel the way Ryan did. I was sure of that.

That night, I fell asleep wrapped in his arms, something I had dreamed of so many times. I wasn’t even aware when he left until I reached for him and didn’t feel him. I found a note and smiled. He’d had to get home to relieve the babysitter and didn’t want to wake me. More sweet words filled the page, and I sighed. I held the note to my chest like a teenager in love for the first time. I would probably get my heart broken, but at that moment, I didn’t care. I just wanted to revel in the afterglow of Ryan’s lovemaking. I could still smell him, taste him, feel him. I went back to sleep with a smile on my face.

* * *

“Hey, sis.”

I spun around with a smile. “Hi, Eric.”

He planted a kiss on my cheek, and I went back to stirring my pesto sauce. “Lunch is just about ready.”

Eric rubbed his hands together, “Great, I’m starving.” He grabbed two plates and set the dining table for two.

Once we were settled, he gave me a long stare. My brow quirked. “What?”

“You’re glowing.”

With a snort, I picked up my glass and took a gulp of water. “Um, thanks?” Hopefully, my face didn’t show my discomfort. Of course, I was glowing. That’s what amazing sex did for a girl. If Eric knew that I was getting that fantastic sex from his best friend for the past week, he would probably flip.

“New boyfriend?”

I nearly choked. “Eric, that is none of your business!”

“Of course, it’s my business. I’m your older brother. I have to look out for you.”

“Right because I’m still twelve.” Rolling my eyes, I stuffed my mouth with pasta, giving me a few seconds to compose myself. “No boyfriend. I’m happily single.” It was the truth, partially. Single, yes, happy, not quite. Ryan and I weren’t an item. We had fallen into the friends with benefits category, which killed me, but I would take what I could get for the time being. We didn't talk about a future or what we were; we just did what our bodies wanted and craved.

“Hmm.” He studied me intently then finally said, “Okay.” Subject dropped. Thank you! “So, how’s business?” He inquired.

I hesitated. Lie or not to lie? “Fine.”

He nodded. “Good.”

"So we haven't discussed it, but Christmas is a few days away. What are we doing?” Usually, we would both spend the holiday with our parents. We hadn’t really planned anything for that year.

He shrugged. “I guess it’s just you and me this year, kid.”

“I told you not to call me that.”

He grinned. “Alright, ma’am.” I sent him a glare, and he chuckled. “Maybe we can spend the day with Ryan, Maxi, and Becky. That sounds like a good idea, right?”

I cleared my throat lightly. It would be awkward, but if I refused, Eric would be suspicious. “Sure, sounds great. But, don’t you think Ryan will take the girls to Chicago to spend Christmas with their grandmother?”

“Nope, he said they’re going for Mrs. Pearce’s birthday next month instead. I think he wants them here, give them some stability since it’s their first without… you know.”

I nodded understanding. “In that case, let’s do it. As long as Ryan agrees. I can do the full works, turkey, stuffing, but only as long as you promise to help chop and prepare.” I hoped my cheerful tone was convincing. Ryan would probably hate the idea of all of us together. He already felt guilty about what we were doing behind Eric’s back. I understood that he valued his friendship with Eric, but I felt like his dirty secret. Instantly, my mood darkened.

“You okay, Luce?”

“I’m great,” I murmured and forced out a bright smile. “We should do brother-sister lunches more often.”

Eric smiled. “Definitely.” He gave me a piercing look. He knew something was off. Damn his perceptiveness. Having a lawyer for a brother was annoying at times.

It was time to turn the table. “So, bro, how’s that pretty school teacher you’ve been dating?”

Blue eyes, much like mine, twinkled. “None of your business.”

“Oh, so you’re allowed to ask about my love life, but I can’t ask about yours?” I snorted. “That’s bull.”

He laughed. “I’m older than you are.”

“You can’t play the age card with this one.”

We fell into our usual banter, and there was no more talk of Ryan or work.