The atmosphere at the table inside the Riverside Inn was almost as frosty as the early December night. Summer sipped her pint, trying to stay calm, feeling the tension radiating off Claire, sitting beside her. As much as she tried, she couldn’t help glancing at her phone, calculating the minutes that Mason and Tania had been gone.
Mason and Tania.
Summer had never expected Tania to come back into Mason’s life. Until today, she had been a figure rooted firmly in the past, a woman of almost mythical status. She forced herself to move her phone away from her, unable to stop the sigh from escaping.
Claire put her hand over Summer’s. Summer felt a flash of anger but pushed it back down.
‘I am so, so sorry, Sum,’ Claire said. ‘I didn’t realize she’d be here. She assured me, when she organized the moorings for us, that she would be gone for the whole month. She said specifically that she didn’t want to cause an atmosphere, so I have no idea what she’s playing at!’
The remorse on Claire’s usually cheerful face changed it completely, and Summer’s anger began to fade, replaced by worry at the thought that Tania had misled Claire on purpose. ‘I know it’s not your fault,’ she said quietly. ‘But that doesn’t make it any easier.’
Claire took a sip of wine. ‘Of course it doesn’t. God, I had such high hopes for this trip. When I found out we had the opportunity to come to Little Venice for a week, so close to Christmas, and that there would be enough visitor moorings for all of us, I jumped at the chance. And I couldn’t imagine being here without you and the canal boat café. I know it’s been over a year since we were roving together, and that I manage fine with my band of brothers, but this was too special to miss. And I was going to tell you that Tania had sorted out the moorings for us, but as she’d promised she wouldn’t be here, I didn’t think it mattered. Especially when you told me Mason was reluctant to come – I didn’t want to put him off either.’
They’d spent the last fortnight travelling the British waterways from Willowbeck, Summer and Mason’s picturesque fenland village home, after Claire had invited them to join in with the impromptu festive market in London, three weeks before Christmas. Mason had been thrown by the short notice, but after a day or so he’d relented, and Summer had been delighted that she’d have him, and their dogs Latte and Archie, on board her café boat Madeleine for five whole weeks. Their excitement upon arriving in Little Venice earlier that day had turned to shock when Tania had been waiting to greet them in the pub.
‘I’m sure they won’t be gone long,’ Summer said, trying to reassure herself more than anyone. Mason had told Tania he was happy to speak to her, and Tania had suggested a late-night coffee shop around the corner. They’d been gone fourteen minutes. ‘When did you catch up with her again?’
Claire sighed. ‘We lost touch, years ago, after the whole Mason thing happened. But we were down here this spring, just for an overnight, and she came on my boat. She’d recognized it from before, of course, told me she was living here now, had a permanent mooring in Little Venice – I remember thinking she must have sold her soul to be able to afford it. It was a shock to see her, I can tell you.’
‘You and me both,’ Summer murmured, taking a slow sip of her beer.
‘We went for a drink in this very pub,’ Claire continued. ‘I said that I knew where Mason was, and I told her what he’d told me, that when they met he hadn’t long been a liveaboard, and was grieving for his wife; he’d lost everything and was starting again from scratch. I explained that he’d come to realize it was far too soon for him to be in a new relationship, and that he’d decided the best thing for both of them was to walk away. She knows how sorry he is, about how he treated her. I also told her that he was happy now, that he was with you.’
Summer swallowed. ‘What did she say?’
‘She took it all in, she said she could understand the circumstances, and that it was a relief to know the real reason he’d left.’ Claire shook her head. ‘I know Mason wanted to get in touch with her, to clear the air between them, but when I mentioned the possibility to Tania she said she needed more time, that when she’d had a chance to mull it over she’d decide whether she wanted to speak to him. I was only in Little Venice that one night, I left the next day and normal life resumed. It was a while before I heard from Tania again, a few text messages, but she didn’t mention Mason and I didn’t want to push it. I thought when she was ready, she’d ask for his number – whatever. And then she let me know about the moorings, and I realized there was space for all of us. She told me she’d be going away, and I thought that was because she wasn’t ready to see him again. Somewhere in the last few weeks she’s changed her mind and hasn’t bothered to update me.’
It was this fact, more than anything else, that made Summer feel nauseous.
Why had Tania told Claire she was going to leave Little Venice and then done the opposite? She must have known the date they were arriving because she’d booked their moorings. Maybe she’d watched them all cruise up the canal, had perhaps followed Jas or Ryder to the pub, knowing Mason and Claire wouldn’t be too far behind. The fact that she hadn’t let Claire know her change of plans, so Claire, in turn, could warn Summer and Mason that she’d be there, seemed underhand.
‘Why do you think she didn’t tell you?’ Summer asked, her mouth dry.
‘I don’t know, Sum,’ Claire said, sounding equally unsure. ‘Maybe she changed her mind about wanting to see Mason, or maybe her Christmas plans simply fell through? I’m just so sorry. Do you want to – shall we go and find them?’
Summer shook her head, trying not to listen to the whispers of doubt that had started up. She trusted Mason, she knew that he had wanted the chance to speak to Tania, even if these particular circumstances weren’t ideal. She couldn’t go barging in there and split them up. She had to let it play out.
Ryder put a tray of drinks on the table and handed them out, flashing a curious glance in Summer’s direction. She wasn’t sure how much the rest of the roving traders knew about the situation, the history between Mason and Tania, but she wasn’t about to do a survey round the table.
‘He needs to do this,’ Summer said. ‘Once he’d told me about Lisa, about why things had ended so abruptly with Tania, he wanted to let her know the truth, to apologize. But not like this, not without time to get his head around seeing her again, and work out what he was going to say. It must be like a thunderbolt.’
‘God, Sum.’ Claire sighed heavily. ‘I know that. If I’d had any idea what she was going to do, I would have warned you, or tried to talk her out of it. I never meant for either of you to meet her like this.’
Summer finished her first drink, and pulled her second towards her. ‘Mason talks about Lisa sometimes, but it still isn’t easy for him. He’s started to open up about their relationship, recalling happier memories, but it’s as if he needs to, rather than wants to. I can tell he’s not comfortable doing it.’ It was easier, somehow, to talk to Claire about Mason, about how he might be feeling, than to admit how much Tania’s appearance had thrown her.
Claire winced. ‘I get that. He’s certainly a different creature to the man I knew back then, with the neat hair and meticulous routine, only just learning what it was like to live on the waterways. He was as polished and perfect as his boat, and looking back it was obviously this carefully crafted exterior with a load of shit going on underneath, but because he’s so much more relaxed these days, so together, I sometimes forget that he’s had all this to deal with.’
‘He’ll be OK,’ Summer said, but it came out as a whisper. ‘I’m going to propose to him, you know,’ she added. She didn’t know why she’d said it, perhaps the need to hold onto something positive when things were suddenly so upside down.
‘What?!’ Claire’s voice was almost a screech, and everyone at the table turned towards her.
‘What’s going on?’ Ryder asked. ‘Spill, ladies.’
‘Go and find your own gossip,’ Claire said, rolling her eyes good-naturedly at him. She turned her body towards Summer, blocking out everyone else. ‘Sorry – again. Tell me! This is awesome news.’
‘I was going to do it at Christmas,’ Summer admitted. ‘But then this trip came up, and I knew I’d run out of time to get everything in place. I’m going to ask him on New Year’s Eve, hopefully, once we’re back in Willowbeck. If it’s all – if we’re OK, still, by then.’
Claire’s eyes widened. ‘Why on earth wouldn’t you be?’
Summer fidgeted, wondering whether to voice her insecurities. If Harry was here she would let everything come tumbling out, no question, but Claire knew Tania, was friends with her, despite the fact that Tania had kept her in the dark on this occasion.
‘Tania’s so beautiful,’ she said to Claire. ‘So … composed.’
‘Oh God,’ Claire said. ‘Summer, you have nothing to worry about.’ She grabbed both Summer’s hands. ‘I know this is a shock, and that Tania’s appeared out of the blue, but she’s in the process of starting her own business, she’s settled down here. I don’t know if she’s seeing anyone because we’ve not had that discussion, but she’s not interested in getting back with Mason. The only possible reason that she’s here, tonight, is that she wants to clear the air.’
‘How can you be so sure?’ Summer’s voice was small. She hated herself for sounding so pathetic, but this had knocked her for six.
‘Because … because she’s not, OK? And even if she was, Mason hasn’t got eyes for anyone else. That’s a hundred per cent, bona fide fact.’
‘She said: “I’ve never forgotten him.”’
‘What?’
‘That’s what Tania said. When Mason had walked out and she told me she wanted to talk to him.’
‘She might not have forgotten him, but that doesn’t mean she wants to pick up where they left off. Mason’s so different now, and I’m sure she is. Even if there was the will from either of them – which there isn’t – it’s just not possible.’
‘You sound very confident,’ Summer said, trying a chuckle. It sounded rusty.
‘That’s because I am, Sum. You have absolutely no reason to be concerned. We’ll give them another ten minutes and if they haven’t reappeared, we’ll find them and force them back to the festivities.’
‘Sounds like a plan,’ Summer said quietly. ‘I wasn’t expecting it, that’s all. Finally facing this … figment, this woman I’ve only ever heard about. I wasn’t ready, Claire, and certainly not for her to be so … so …’
‘You can stop that now. Don’t you dare lose your confidence, Summer Freeman. You’re funny and warm and beautiful, and Mason loves you. That’s all you need to know. I’m so, so bloody sorry that I wasn’t able to prevent this mess, that I’ve let this week get off to a shitty start. As soon as you come up with a way for me to make it up to you, tell me what it is. But in the meantime, I want to know everything about this proposal. I want to know exactly how you’re planning on popping the question, and what your dream wedding looks like.’
As Summer told her, her nerves began to settle. Claire loved the idea of the banner hanging from Willowbeck’s bridge, and asked Summer what Mason’s favourite songs were, suggesting that she put together a playlist that Madeleine could have going on in the background, and offered to lend her some external speakers and help her set them up.
Summer laughed, as she always did when she was with Claire, her friend’s enthusiasm infectious, despite the circumstances. Her glances towards her phone became less frequent – they had been gone thirty-five minutes now – and Summer tried not to picture them leaning towards each other over a table in the café, the windows opaque with condensation, sparks of attraction reigniting between them, like fireflies glowing in the dusk.
Her phone buzzed with a message from Harry, asking if they’d arrived safely. She smiled wryly, picturing her friend’s face when she updated her on all that had happened.
She had started to reply when a hand landed gently on her shoulder, fingers tickling her neck. Summer closed her eyes, surprised at the emotion the touch brought, realizing how tense she’d been.
‘Mason.’ She swivelled round in her chair and then stood. ‘Are you OK?’
He nodded. He looked tired, dark shadows under his eyes. ‘I’m sorry I was so long,’ he said. ‘I might head back. Do you want to stay, or …’
‘I’ll come with you,’ she said quickly. She couldn’t see Tania, and wondered whether she hadn’t come back with Mason, but then spotted her long dark hair slipping through the crowd towards the Ladies.
Summer gave Claire a brief hug and waved goodbye to the others, promising the first round the next evening would be hers, a sentiment that was met with applause, and light heckling from Ryder. She pulled her coat on and did it up, Mason helping her with the stiff top button.
‘Do you mind if we don’t go back to the boat yet?’ Mason asked. ‘I could do with clearing my head, and we’ll still have time to take Archie and Latte for a walk before bed.’
‘If they aren’t conked out on the sofa already,’ Summer said, smiling gently. ‘Do you want me to come, or would you rather be on your own?’
They stepped out into the night. The cold was biting and soothing all at once.
Mason faced her. ‘I’d like you to come, unless you’re too tired. I want to tell you how it went. I don’t want to keep anything from you.’ His Adam’s apple bobbed, a day’s worth of stubble making him look even wearier.
She nodded, relief coursing through her. Maybe there were no fireflies, no sparks. They turned away from the river, along residential streets lined with cars. The air was full of city sounds: shouts, laughter, a distant siren, the underlying hum of traffic. They walked hand in hand, silent except for the occasional direction from Mason.
‘I hope you’re keeping track of where we’re going,’ Summer said jokingly, but she meant it. After everything else, she didn’t want to get lost on their first night.
‘We’ll be fine,’ Mason murmured. ‘Here it is.’
He’d stopped in front of a narrow building squeezed between two others, with a blue awning that looked more suited to a newsagent’s than a bar or pub. The windows glowed invitingly beneath a sign that read Benji’s, a mesh of coloured, twinkling lights covering one of the large panes of glass. Summer followed Mason inside.
It was the smallest, snuggest bar she’d ever been in. It had blue, velvety booths squashed close together and bright mosaics on the walls, the low hum of unobtrusive music in the background. The bar was wide enough for three men standing abreast, and there was a pure white cat sitting at its base, licking its front paw intently.
‘How did you know about this place?’ Summer asked.
‘My editor told me about it,’ Mason said, gesturing towards an unoccupied booth in the corner. ‘He said it was close to Little Venice, and a bit out of the ordinary. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to find it, but …’ He shrugged, took off his coat and went to the bar.
Summer settled into the comfortable booth and stared at her new surroundings, thinking how surreal the evening had become after the jubilant, busy afternoon serving in the café. To think she had felt threatened by the flirtatious woman in the sparkly hat.
‘Here.’ Mason slid in opposite her, clinking his wine glass against hers before taking a sip. He was wearing a loose-fitting khaki shirt, the sleeves rolled up to the elbows. Summer caught a whiff of his usual citrus and vanilla scent. He was so familiar to her now, and yet, at this moment, she had no idea what he was about to tell her.
‘How did it go?’ she asked. ‘Are you all right?’
His smile was tired. He reached his hand out and she held it, resting her arm on the table.
‘I’m OK,’ he said. ‘It hasn’t been the easiest evening, but I’m glad I spoke to her.’ He sipped his wine.
‘Did you tell her everything?’ Summer asked. ‘About Lisa, about becoming a liveaboard?’
He nodded. ‘Claire paved the way when they ran into each other a few months ago, so she had some idea. But I wanted her to hear it from me, how I never meant to treat her badly and thought I was doing the opposite when I disappeared, believing it would be best for both of us. That’s how screwed up I was.’ He sighed. ‘I owed it to her to be honest about it all.’
Summer nodded, holding back the question she most wanted to ask. ‘And how did she take it?’
‘Well. Better than I thought she would, though of course she’s had a while to think about it.’
‘She forgave you?’
‘She said it was water under the bridge.’ He laughed gently.
‘And how do you feel, now that you’ve cleared the air? Was it weird, seeing her again?’ She drummed her fingers on her knee under the table, hoping Mason wouldn’t see how nervous she was.
‘Very weird,’ he said. ‘Good. But … it’s been so long. And when we were together, I was numb, really. I did care about her, but … I’ve blocked a lot of it out, or my mind has simply refused to let me remember the details. So it felt unbalanced, somehow. As if she’d held a lot more store in our relationship than I had. And tonight, she wanted to hear how things were now, what I’d been up to. She told me about living in Little Venice too, and asked about you, Claire and the other traders.’ He looked at the table, his brows knitting together. ‘I didn’t mean to be so long, but I didn’t feel like I could leave.’
‘Of course, Mason, it’s fine,’ Summer said. ‘Claire’s sorry it turned out this way – apparently Tania had planned to go away for the whole of December. She hadn’t expected her to be here.’
Mason looked up at her. ‘Tania said she needed to change her plans, that she can’t go and see her family until closer to Christmas. She apologized for springing herself on me – on us, like this.’
Summer nodded, wondering if she believed her. She wanted to, but there was something about Tania’s smooth smile, the way she had glided easily towards them through the pub, the look she had given Mason, that was putting her on edge. ‘Are you sure you’re OK with this?’ she asked. ‘Do you want to go back to Willowbeck? I’ll do whatever’s best for you.’
‘What’s best,’ he said, leaning across the table towards her, ‘is that we put this behind us now, and enjoy London. I’m not spending two weeks travelling all this way only to turn straight around. I need a few more days at least before we have to tackle all those locks again.’
‘You’re sure?’
‘I’m sure, Summer. It’s you, me, Madeleine and the dogs against London’s Christmas revellers. I’ve been looking forward to it, and I’m not going to let this put us off course. It wasn’t how I’d pictured our first night here, but I’m fine. I’ve wanted to talk to Tania for a long time. It was a conversation I needed to have, and now it’s done. But –’ He held her gaze, his dark eyes clouded with concern. ‘Are you OK? You’ve been so supportive tonight, looking out for me, giving me time with Tania. But after hearing so much about her, about the history we have, it can’t have been easy for you, either.’
Summer swallowed. ‘I’m fine,’ she said breezily. ‘Of course I am. I was worried – angry, on your behalf, but that’s all.’
He sighed, let go of her hand and in a moment was round at her side of the table.
‘Budge up.’ He forced her to scoot along the banquette and sat next to her, his eyes fixing on hers. They had a spark in them, and it was as if he’d come back to life, as if he’d shut the best parts of himself away while he dealt with Tania, and was only now letting them out again. ‘Don’t worry about Tania,’ he said, stroking her hair away from her forehead. ‘We’ve said all that we needed to. We’ve put the past officially behind us, and if she’s there at any point this week – and she told me she might be, while Claire’s here – then we’ll just get on with it. But I don’t want you to worry, about me, or about me with Tania. She is part of my past, and you, Summer, are my future.’
He kissed her. It was soft but passionate, and she pulled him closer, holding onto him tightly. She didn’t want to admit to herself – and definitely not to Mason – how much seeing Tania had scared her, how ungrounded she’d felt while the other woman had Mason’s full attention. His kiss and his touch were bringing her back to life, too.
‘Shall we go and see how Archie and Latte are getting on?’ she asked, once the kiss had ended, their faces close, the snug bar seeming to shrink around them. She had a lot of baking to do between now and opening time, but that seemed unimportant now that she’d got Mason back. She hadn’t lost him, not literally, but for a couple of hours her whole world had shifted, and she needed to right it again. Mason was the best way of doing that. Luckily, he seemed to agree with her.
‘Yes,’ he murmured. His fingers traced a line slowly and deliciously down her neck, making her tingle, then he scooted backwards, out of the booth, and held his hand out for her to take. ‘Let’s go home.’