I throw off my comforter, turn over, and glare at my alarm clock. This has been the longest night of my life. The minute Koa stormed out the door and drove out of sight, I knew I wasn't getting any sleep tonight. I wanted to run after him, take his hand and hold him close while I begged him to stay.

But that never happened. I never moved. Instead, I stood there and watched the man I care about fade away.

I grab the sheets and pull them over my head, trying to block out the thoughts crowding my mind. It’s no use, my mind won’t quit, and I’m dragged once again back to the conversation that started it all.

My Mom’s hints that Koa and I are a little too close…

Her reminder that my time in Maine is coming to a close…

And what lays in store for me when I get back to New York.

Was it her tone or years of conditioning that made me clam up? Or was I just a wimp of the lowest kind?

Both. And I’m willing to bet money that I’m the only twenty-four-year-old woman in New York City who still lets her mommy boss her around.

God, I’m a mess.

I cast off the covers and sit up in bed. You know what? I’m done wallowing in endless self-pity. I’m over watching life pass me by, always on the sidelines and never in the action. It’s time I stopped doing what I’m told and started taking what I want.

I switch on the lamp and check the time. Three minutes have slid by since I last checked, which means it’s still too early to go over there—

No! I swing my feet to the floor and stand up. That’s the old Summer talking. I’m taking what I want from now on, remember? And what I want is probably cursing my name in his sleep right now.

Fifteen minutes later, I pull onto the gravel drive leading to Koa’s property. The tires crunch and pop on the rocks as I glide past the Victorian sitting silently on the hill. A cloud passes over the moon, throwing its facade into splotchy, mysterious shadows.

I shiver in my seat and yank the wheel to the side, taking the turn toward Koa’s shop. I glance in the rearview mirror and pick up my speed. I need to put some distance between me and that ghost house.

I round the corner and catch sight of the barn. The windows are ablaze with light and the large barn doors are cracked open, bathing the driveway with warm yellow light. I pull to a stop and turn off the engine, straining my ears as the sweet sound of music floats through the air. Sinatra, if I had to hazard a guess, and it’s coming from inside the workshop.

So Koa couldn’t sleep either.

I walk to the doors and peer inside, glancing around the large space for its owner. I spot Koa immediately in the center of the room, half-turned from me with a pen tucked behind his ear as he studies a pile of hand-drawn mock-ups on a worktable.

Sinatra hides my approach. I’m almost on top of him before he notices my presence. The papers fall from his hand as he jerks around. He gives a muffled shout and grabs the edge of the table.

“Sorry! I didn’t mean to scare you.”

He runs a hand over his heart and takes a deep breath. “What are you doing here, Summer?”

I bite my lip. “I had to see you.”

“Why?”

“Because I wanted to apologize.”

He cocks his head. “For what?”

I frown. “Koa—”

“Look, it’s late,” he interrupts, getting to his feet. “You shouldn’t have come here.”

“But I wanted to. I couldn’t sleep after you left. After what happened earlier.”

He shrugs. “I’m okay.”

I glance around the brightly lit workroom. “So you always work through the night?”

Another shrug. The blood rushes to my head. I know what he’s doing, and I’m not letting him get away with it.

“Koa, stop it. I know you overheard that conversation with my mom, and I’m sorry for what I said…” My gaze sinks to the floor. “Or didn’t say.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

My head snaps up. “Are you serious?”

“Yeah. You shouldn’t apologize about the truth.”

“What are you talking about?”

He grabs his mug off the table and strolls over to the coffee pot. “You meant what you said, or didn’t say. I’m just glad I know the truth now.”

“About what?” I cry as he leisurely pours himself a fresh cup. His nonchalant attitude is driving me mad.

“That I’m nothing to you.” He turns and faces me. “Not worth a damn thing.”

“That’s not true!”

“Well, you had me fooled, friend.”

I wince at the term, still fresh and raw in my mind. “I don’t know why I introduced you like that. I’m sorry. I was…” My eyes dart around the shop, landing on everything but the pair of blue eyes staring at me. “Afraid.”

“Why?”

I drag my gaze to his. “Of what my parents would say. Of what they’d think.”

Pain flits across his face. Then it’s gone, replaced by an unreadable, stony look. “Alright. Well, I won’t waste any more of your precious time.” He slams his cup down and turns to the worktable on his left. I stand there mutely as he gets back to work.

“Koa…”

He glances up at me with a frown. “Feel free to see yourself out. Wouldn’t want Charlene or Tom to get worried.”

I ball my hands into fists. “Stop it.”

He looks up. “Excuse me?”

“Stop pretending like you're fine.”

“Maybe I am fine.”

“I know you’re not!”

He holds up a hand. “Listen to me—”

“No, you listen to me. I know you’re torn up inside and a wreck. I know that calling you a friend felt like a stab to the heart. I know it killed you when my mom said all those terrible things and hearing her talk about the boring guys she’d rather see me with.”

Koa’s chest rises and falls in quick, short breaths. “How could you know that?”

“Because I feel the same!”

“Summer—”

“Only it’s a thousand times worse, because I’m to blame.”

He reaches me as the first tear rolls down my cheek. “Summer, baby, don’t cry,” he murmurs, threading his fingers through my hair and cupping my cheek with his palm. He leans in and kisses away my tears. “Don’t cry over me. I’m sorry.”

A sob rises in my throat. “No, I’m the one that’s s-sorry!”

He brings my head under his chin and hugs me, wrapping his strong arms around my shoulders as he tries to stop my tears. “I was mad, but I’m not anymore. I could never stay mad at you.”

“But I’m mad at myself.” I hold back the sobs threatening to overwhelm me. “I can’t b-believe I stood there and let her say those things. I sh-should have said something!”

He sways me gently side to side. “It’s okay. I don’t care what she thinks. You’re here now.”

“I thought I lost you, Koa,” I whisper into the crook of his shoulder. “When you walked out that door? I thought I’d never see you again.”

“You know I couldn’t stay away for long. This may come as a surprise, Rae, but I like you now.”

I give a feeble laugh as he uses my own words from earlier. I push back and look up at him, leaving the comfort of his arms. I feel cold and weak without their strength, but I need to stand on my own two feet for what I’m about to say. “Koa, I realized something tonight. Something important.”

“What is it?”

“I realized that I want you.” I take a deep breath. “All of you.”

His breath catches in his throat. “Summer—”

I place my hand on his chest and shake my head. “No talking.” I take a step forward and rock up onto my toes until my lips are inches from his. I stare into his eyes, brilliant and blue like the sea. “I want to show you how much you mean to me.”

Koa’s eyes never leave my face as my hand slides down his chest to his waist. My fingers find his leather belt, scratched and worn from years of rough use, and tug, gently loosening the silver buckle. My other hand joins my first to unfasten the top of Koa’s jeans, gripping the button and twisting it free from its loop.

I pause for a moment when it’s free, raking my eyes over the few inches of black fabric it reveals underneath, before slowly taking the zipper and dragging it down. I yank his jeans down, gliding them down his muscly thighs and knees. He kicks them off as I straighten, sending them skittering cross the dusty floor.

My hands stop at the hem of his shirt, hesitating in their next task. I’ve seen Koa shirtless a dozen times over the last two months, but I’ve never undressed him myself. I’ve never raised his shirt over his head and dropped it to the floor like I’m about to do now.

I glance up and meet his sea-blue eyes. They’re burning with the same passion and need I feel coursing through my veins that I’m done pushing away.

I take two fistfuls of shirt and pull, the soft cotton bunching in my curled fingers. He holds his arms up as I slip the fabric up his chest, cresting his shoulders, and above his head. I hold the wadded cloth for a moment, pinching the warm fibers between my fingers, before letting it fall in a heap on the dusty floor.

“You’re incredible,” I breathe, my gaze roaming up his sinewed biceps to his hard, tanned pecks. My eyes dip to his flat stomach before gliding lower, following his perfect v-taper to the bulge that strains against his boxer-briefs. I slide my fingers underneath his waistband. Just a tiny tug will send them over his narrow hips, freeing his hardness and giving us both what we crave.

“Wait.” His hand closes over mine, stopping my fingers’ downward progress. I bite my lip and try to pull away, ashamed at how brazen I’d been. Had I missed the signals? Is this not what he wants, too?

He draws his other hand over my cheek and tilts my face up toward his, his calloused palm cooling my burning cheeks. His eyes are full of warmth and love as they gaze into mine, telling me he wants this too. Wants this more than anything.

“I want to to see you first,” he murmurs, his deep voice setting fire to my trembling body. Goosebumps erupt across my flushed skin as I realize what he means—what we’re really about to do. He’s going to lay me bare just as I did him.

I sigh as his hand grazes the side of my face, caressing the line of my neck and the hollow of my throat, before tracing my collarbone. A shudder of excitement flares through me as his fingertips trace the curve of my breast, gliding over the thin fabric of my sundress with loving care.

I moan as his thumb grazes my nipple, already pebbling under his tantalizing touch. I catch my breath as I watch fire lick at the corners of his eyes. He closes them for a moment and takes a deep breath.

“Not yet,” he mutters, meeting my hungry gaze. “Not until I see you.”

He grabs the hem of my dress, bunching the chiffon in his fist. His other hand leaves my chest to help, and soon my dress is gliding up my thighs, the soft fabric sending a ripple of pleasure as it caresses my skin, before hitching over my waist to my chest. I lift my arms as Koa guides it over my head. The cool night air hits my newly exposed skin all at once, sending a wave of pinpricks dancing across my smooth flesh.

The serene melody of Sinatra floats through the air, drawing out the soft hum of the crickets and bullfrogs singing to the night sky outside. But I barely register any of it. I forget about the dusty workshop and the smell of sawdust and the close night air licking at my skin as I stand in front of Koa. Because he is everything to me just then, and I know I’m everything to him.

He rakes his eyes over my body, enjoying every detail, every curve, with unbridled pleasure. “You’re beautiful, Summer. You know that?”

I turn away as my cheeks flush.

“No…” He drops my dress to the dirty floor and steps forward. “You’re more than that. You’re exquisite. You’re everything I’ve ever dreamed of.”

I catch my breath. “Koa?”

“Yes?”

I swallow and look up. “Show me.”

We stumble together in a rush of passion, lust, and desire. Koa wraps his arms around me and pulls me close before bringing his lips crashing down onto mine. I return his fierce kisses with a need of my own, a need that I’ve ignored for too long.

I breathe him in, letting his heady male scent drift over me, my thoughts flying to the ocean as I fill my nostrils with pine, sweat, and salt. I press my body closer to his as I explore his mouth with my hungry tongue, his sweaty skin hot under my touch. Whether it’s from working through the night or what’s happening between us, I don’t know. But I do know that I’m burning just as hot. That I’m on fire to finally have what I’ve sought.

A whimper escapes my lips as Koa pulls away. I’m not ready to let him go, to be alone again so soon after tasting what I crave, but it’s only for a second. He bends down, snakes an arm under my knees, and lifts me off my feet and into his arms. He moves around the boat, carrying me across the room to the back staircase…

The staircase that leads to his apartment.

He holds me close as he takes the steps two at a time, keeping me tight to his chest and safe from harm. He reaches the top landing and turns right, passing a spacious kitchen and living room before heading down the hall. I get a glimpse of a bathroom and an office before he kicks open the last door. It springs back on its hinges to reveal a master bedroom, complete with a leather couch and king size bed.

Koa heads for the bed.

He puts me down gently and strides to the nightstand. He opens the drawer, paws through it, then slams it shut with a curse.

“What?” I ask, sitting up to rest on my elbows.

He clears his throat and rubs a hand through the waves of his inky hair. “I’m out of condoms.”

“Oh.”

He looks away. “I don’t entertain a lot of women.”

I pull myself onto my knees and shuffle toward him. He looks around as I glide my hands around his neck and pull him close. “Koa? That’s the sexiest thing you could’ve said.”

He frowns. “But this means…”

I shake my head. “I don’t want some man-whore. I want you.” I bring my lips to his for a long kiss before pulling away. “And it doesn’t matter, because I’m on the pill.”

His frustration evaporates. “You are?”

I nod, a playful smile growing on my lips.

He sweeps me into his arms and onto my back with a growl. “Come here, you…” He leans down and nips at my neck, sending an electric shock of desire coursing through me. “I’ve got a few things to show you.”

I gasp as he drags his fingertips up my stomach to my chest before reaching around for my bra clasp. My lacy bra springs free and falls to the side, revealing my creamy breasts to Koa’s waiting eyes.

“Beautiful,” he murmurs before turning his attention south. He dips his fingers under my panties and tugs, sending them scooting over my hips and down my thighs to my knees. The soft sound of rain begins to drum against the metal roof above us, adding its soft melody to my pounding heartbeats as Koa glides the dark purple fabric down my calves and over my ankles.

“Koa,” I whisper, meeting his heady gaze, “I want you inside me.”

He leans down and kisses me hard as he presses my outer thighs against the mattress. He slides into me slowly, letting my tightness adjust to his thick girth. He groans as he pushes in deep, filling me with every inch of his length. He closes his eyes and starts to move inside me, slowly at first, but then gaining speed as his need swells within him.

He opens his eyes and gazes down at me, longing and pure joy intertwined with his lust. He ducks his head and takes my soft breast in his mouth, flicking my nipple with every deep thrust of his hips.

I wrap my legs around him as slick heat washes over me and pools deep in my belly.

“Baby,” he moans, pulsing faster. I match his hard thrusts with needy ones of my own, sending us both to the edge of pure ecstasy.

I cry out as the white-hot heat swirls in my belly and bursts through my limbs, exciting every inch of me as Koa’s tip grazes over my sensitive center. I buck against him, letting the tidal wave of euphoria render me numb.

Koa gasps, reaching his limit. My walls convulse around him as he shudders and releases inside me, filling my core with his warmth. He drives into me once, then twice, before collapsing onto the bed next to me.

“Summer…” he breathes, reaching out for me. I scoot into his side, wrapping his arm around my shoulders and pulling him close. The heady tang of sex fills my lungs as I snuggle in deeper to his chest, slowly arching my butt against his groin.

“Don’t go doing that,” he groans into my ear, nuzzling his cheek into the back of my neck, “or you’ll get another round.”

I giggle and wiggle in deeper. “Maybe I want that.”

He slides his arm under my head and presses me to his chest. “So do I, but I need sleep first. You kept me awake, remember?”

“I thought you always worked into the night?”

His laughs sends my fine hair billowing out onto the soft pillow. “I’ll work hard into the night—”

“Koa!”

“—but not until I get my sleep, woman.”

“Alright,” I grumble, shifting in his arms. “But you’re getting off easy.”

He grunts. “Another pun?”

I jab him in the ribs, earning another grunt. “Good night, Koa.”

He kisses my ear softly, exciting all the spots I’m trying to cool down. “Night, Summer. Sweet dreams.”

His breathing slows and smooths out a few minutes later, signaling that he’s succumbed to the night. I lie there for a while longer, thinking of what this means, what we mean now that we’ve crossed this invisible line, until the soft patter of rain lulls me to sleep.

It’s a deep sleep, so sweet and satisfying that I hope never to wake up. But that’s not true. Because when I do wake, I’ll find myself in a another dream…

Lovingly held in my lover’s strong arms amidst a sea of soft bedsheets, ready and waiting for round two.