Hawke
Past - Five years ago
“Man, you can’t leave now, let’s celebrate. This shit doesn’t happen every day.”
I sigh. “As much as I wanna celebrate with you, brother, I promised Josie I’d come home tonight. She’s been at me all week, and if I don’t show up tonight I’m fucked.” I grunt, tapping Quill on the back. “I’m so happy for you, man. President of the Blood Brothers MC is something you’ve wanted for so long. I’m proud of you, Quill,” I say, meaning every single word.
Quill smiles wolfishly. “Thanks, brother. And Hawke, I want you as my VP.”
My eyes widen and I stare at him, stunned. “Really?” I ask, surprised. “I mean there’s Blaze and Gunner.”
Quill narrows his eyes at me. “You’re the best fucking man I know, Hawke. I wouldn’t want anyone else beside me as my VP. We go way back.”
I nod. “That we do.”
Quill and I served in the Marines together for two tours, until he was dishonorably discharged. I continued on with my last tour, and when I returned home to New York, I went to see Quill in prison, where he was sentenced to three years for not following through on a direct order. It gutted me that I couldn’t help my brother out, but there was nothing any one of us could do. Quill broke a code and he was punished for it. His old man pulled a few strings and he only served two years of his sentence, but if it had been up to me he wouldn’t have served at all. Quill was only doing what he was born to do: stand by his brothers. He was going in to save a fellow Marine when he was asked to stand down by our Commanding Officer. Quill couldn’t obey the order. He went in even with our enemy surrounding the place, and the fucker got him out.
So, here I am now, seated at the wooden table in a room the Blood Brothers MC call church. Quill has just been voted in as president and the boys are out there celebrating a fresh start for the club. Razor, our previous Prez, died in a motorcycle accident, and although it killed us to say goodbye, a new president was needed. Quill’s leadership and determination to make this club better for the good got him voted in. I knew he was the right man for the job, and after only five years with us being part of the Blood Brothers MC, Quill has proven his loyalty to the club and I’m happy as fuck for him. Not only is he my president, but he is like family to me. He’s my brother in more ways than one.
“You sure you can’t come celebrate with us?” Quill asks as he gets up from his seat at the head of the table. Now that he is president, it will be his permanent chair. And as VP, I’ll always be seated to the left of him.
“Yeah, man. Have a drink for me,” I reply, following his move and getting up out of my chair.
I tap Quill on his back and say, “I’ll see ya tomorrow, gotta go take care of my woman.”
Quill shakes his head. “I still can’t believe you’re almost a married man. I’m happy for you, Hawke,” he states resting his hands on his hips. I know those words are hard for him to say, he doesn’t exactly like Josie a hell of a lot, but that’s loyalty there. He knows I love her and he sticks by my decision to marry her.
“Yeah, well, thanks, but you’re next. You need to end things with Jess and find a real woman. There’s nothing sweeter,” I say smirking and rubbing a hand over my scruffy jaw.
Quill’s eyebrows draw together and he laughs. “No fucking way, Hawke. I’m never getting married, let alone fall for some pussy. Ain’t gonna happen. Why would I want to end what I have right here? I’ve got my choice of any woman each night. Plus, Jess is an easy lay. And she gives good head. Why would I want to end all that for just one woman?” he asks as he heads to the door and opens it, smiling back at me.
“Brother, you just haven’t met the right girl yet. Because believe me, when you do, Jess and any other one of those whores out there,” I say pointing my finger towards the door, “won’t be enough anymore. You’ll want the real thing. I promise, brother.”
Quill sighs and shakes his head. “Not on my watch. Now, I’m going out there to get drunk. All this talk of giving myself to one woman has got me all fucked, and not in the right way,” Quill says, walking ahead of me as we exit the room.
The clubhouse is full tonight. “One Step Closer” by Linkin Park is blaring through the speakers. As soon as Jess eyes Quill, she’s all over him. I don’t know what he sees in her. I mean sure, she’s an easy fuck and quite beautiful, but why does he insist on wasting his time with her? I’ve seen the way women are drawn to him, like honey to a beehive, and with his dark looks, and blue eyes that change with his mood, women take one look at him and drop their panties. If only he’ll give one of them a chance. I know I’m being soft at heart but I can’t stand my best friend missing out on something like what I’ve found with Josie. Well, almost.... I’ve been trying to get her to the club but she won’t have it. She’s only ever been to one of our club parties and she pretty much bolted when she saw what happens here. I tried to give her the heads-up, but I guess hearing it and seeing it are two different things. Now she refuses to come down here again which is driving me apeshit, because she doesn’t like me hangin’ with my boys so often.
But how can I choose between them? The club has always come first for me. There’s no way I could have it any other way, and I thought Josie understood that. But I was wrong. She’s hassling me to leave the club, and tonight I’m going to lay all that shit out. I haven’t mentioned any of this to Quill because I know he doesn’t approve of Josie, and I don’t want to give him any other reason to dislike her. If she can’t accept the fact that the brotherhood is my family, then I can’t marry her. As much as I love her, I just can’t choose between them, and if she really loved me she would accept my club.
I give Quill one last pat on his shoulder, congratulating him before I head out for the night. Jess has her mouth on Quill’s neck as he drains his beer. I feel like an ass not celebrating with him but he gets it. He knows how Josie is and how she’s been breaking my balls all this time.
“Hey, baby,” Cassie slurs as I make my way to the exit. She’s been drinking and reeks of tequila. She sways on her feet toward me and places herself in front of the door, blocking my exit. Cassie reaches out and slides her hand down my chest. She’s tempting as fuck in her short, leather skirt, and a silver top that reveals her cleavage. Her toned and tanned body is perfect, with a tight ass which I know all too well feels good to squeeze in my big calloused hands. Her blonde hair is long, reaching her ass, and her blue eyes are hooded with desire. I smirk when I see her lick her lips as her eyes take me in. Cassie knows what I like, and as though she can read my thoughts, she trails her hand lower down my torso and sneaks her finger into the seam of my jeans, brushing it across my lower abdomen and causing me to take in a low and steady breath. She knows the effect she has on me; I’ve been fighting her off for two years, since I caved in and asked Josie to marry me. Cassie knows I’m committed to Josie, but that doesn’t stop her from trying to take what she wants.
Josie and I have been engaged for two years now, and we’re getting married in three months. I finally gave in and agreed on a date. I can still remember the first time I laid eyes on her, in her tight, short business skirt and white collared shirt. She was on a break from her job as a personal assistant, walking across the street to get some lunch. Her brown, wavy hair was draped around her heart-shaped face, and her eyes, God those dark, doe eyes gave me the once-over as she walked across the road in front of me whilst I was stopped at a light. She had smiled at me so shyly, and her innocence blew me away. I continued watching her perfect round ass as she made her way into a café, and I decided on the spot I had to meet this woman, even though I knew she was out of my league. She reeked of class and sophistication, what chance did I have? I was a biker, hell, I wasn’t even a permanent member of the club, just a prospect. I had no future planned out. My future was the Blood Brothers MC. They were all I ever wanted, or needed. I didn’t want a relationship. Cassie was more than enough for me. I had it all. Bikes, parties, and endless women I could fuck whenever I wanted. I had respect around this town, and a best friend who’d always have my back, no matter what. So why did I still want her?
I had pulled over to the side of the road and made my way into the café she’d just entered. I’d searched inside and found her talking to a male, who was taking her lunch order. My stomach had twisted in knots when I saw the stranger flirting with her. I mean, I couldn’t blame him, she was beautiful. Her head turned lazily toward me and our eyes locked. Dark brown eyes that I wanted to crawl into and never leave looked me up and down, and I remember feeling my cock straining against my zipper. She smiled and literally took my breath away. The douche at the counter handed her a number and she took a seat at a table nearby. I had walked over and sat myself down opposite her, drinking her in.
“Can I help you?” she’d asked as if she’d never noticed me. I sat back in my seat and crossed my arms over my chest, contemplating how I was gonna get her into my bed. Her hair looked like silk, and her full, pouty lips had me wondering what they would be like to taste. They were naturally pink, and I knew that once I tasted her she was gonna be the death of me. I can still remember her swift intake of breath when I reached my hand out and glided my fingers over her wrist, feeling her pulse quicken at my touch. We had lunch together that day, and I sweet-talked her into going out to dinner with me that night. She’d said she had to think about it but I hadn’t really given her much of a choice. No fucking way. I wanted her and she was going to be mine, and that’s exactly what I achieved. I made her mine that night, and now I’m going to marry her.
I’m brought back to the present when Cassie squeezes my cock through my jeans. “Sorry, babe,” I state as I grab Cassie’s wrist and pull it away from my groin. “Not happening.”
Cassie huffs and pouts her lips. “You say the same thing every night, Hawke, what’s happened to you? Are you pussy whipped?”
I tighten my hold around her wrist and push her up against the wall, our noses only inches apart. “Be careful, Cassie, be very careful which words you choose to spit at me. Because the next time, I won’t go so easy on you. Take this as a warning.” I push myself back. “See ya round,” I say, and then I’m out the door, straddling my bike and heading out onto the open road to Josie’s apartment. I’d promised her I would take her out to dinner tonight. As much as I wanna stay back and celebrate with Quill, I have a lot to make up for with my fiancée. Fuck Me! Fiancée? The word still surprises me each time I say it.
Parking my bike outside Josie’s apartment, I remove my helmet and run my hands through my long blond hair. I tie it up in a bun just the way Josie likes it and raise myself off my bike, grabbing the bunch of flowers I’d picked up on the way home from the back.
I punch in the security code to enter her apartment complex, and walk up the stairs that lead to her door, unlocking it with the key she’d given me. The lights are out inside and I can’t make out a thing. “Josie, you home, baby?” I shout, but I get no response. I flip the light switch on. I can hear moans coming from the back of the apartment. Her bedroom. The moans get louder, and I throw the flowers on her kitchen bench as I make my way toward them. My hand clutches the doorknob so tightly, I’m shocked it doesn’t rip off. Another cry of ecstasy travels to my ears, and I know that cry. I fucking hear that cry nearly every night when Josie’s screaming out my name as I bring her to orgasm. Without warning, I push open the bedroom door, slamming it against the wall. What I see before me has me raging from the inside out. Josie is on all fours, and some dipshit has his cock in her pussy, jackhammering into her as she cries out.
“What the fuck!” I storm over to them, grabbing the asshole by his shoulders and slamming him flat on the floor, causing him to scream out in pain. I grab his face between my hands and bash his head against the wooden floor, anger blinding my vison. “You fucking touched my woman, you motherfucker,” I yell as blood gushes out beneath his head.
“Stop it, you’re going to kill him!” Josie screams. She hurries off the bed and tries to pull me off him, but she’s no match for me. Her pushing and shoving does nothing to ease my hold on him. When I feel he’s had enough, I wipe my damp forehead with the back of my arm and get up from the floor. Looking down at the asshole in front of me, I see that his eyes are closed. He’s still alive, though, because I can see his chest rising with each shallow breath. I turn my head to face Josie, who has slid down the wall and is crying into her knees. She notices that the beating has stopped, and snaps her head up to meet my gaze. “Is he dead?” she whispers as tears roll down her cheeks.
I take a deep breath and rest my hands on my hips. “That’s all you gotta fucking say to me? Is he dead? Lucky for him, he’s still fucking alive.”
“Please, Hawke,” she begs. “I’m sorry, I was just doing this to get your attention,” she continues, raising herself up from the wall, naked, her body still slick from sex.
She starts to walk toward me and I push my hands out in front of me. “Don’t you fucking dare, Josie. You fucked up the moment you let another man into your bed, giving him what’s mine,” I say, sneering at her.
“Please, Hawke, I love you. I was just trying to get your attention. You don’t care about anything other than that bullshit club,” she spits with venom.
“This is on you. Don’t you dare fucking blame my club,” I say, pouncing on her and forcing her to fall back against the wall. I grab the hair at her nape and twist it around my hand. Her face tilts to mine and tears pool in her eyes. “I loved you. I was going to marry you. There’s no one that will love you the way that I did. You had to go and fuck it up, didn’t you?” I growl. I shake my head and stare down at the floor, disappointment rushing through me. I hear a moan coming out of the fucker’s mouth and I let go of Josie’s hair, making my way to the bedroom door. I turn around one last time to look at her. “Have a good life, sweetheart,” I say and slam the door behind me.