Silly
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T |
hree weeks into her new job, Isabel was finally getting the hang of her new routine. But it didn’t make it any less exhausting than that first week. Before she figured out what the safest time was for her to leave the university once she was done so she’d be on time to pick up the kids, she’d been close to calling Manny or Max, who worked closest to their school, to pick them up because she thought she might not make it. Luckily, both times she had. It’d been close, but she’d made it. It took a few days, but she had it down now—not just what was the latest she could leave but what route to take that took the least amount of time.
It was still tiresome, but at least it was less stressful. Not that Romero would be a jerk about it, but she still didn’t want him to think she couldn’t handle this. When she started this, she thought it’d be a breeze. It was just four hours of her day. She remembered thinking “How hard can it be? Plenty of women work full-time and still deal with their household chores and families.” But she hadn’t taken into account the commute time to and from work, the extra hour she now needed in the morning to get ready while helping the kids get ready as well, and making their breakfast and lunches. Then there was the getting home and preparing them something to hold them over until she could get a real meal together for them.
Having to squeeze in all the usual things she could do so easily before she had to work was so much more exhausting. Like the stuff she typically knocked out in one day on her errand day. Now she had to run errands several times a week because there was no way she could squeeze them all in during the few hours she had once she was out of work and still have dinner ready in time. It felt like far more than four hours of her day were being sucked up by this job.
The family dinner time at the table every night was her thing, not Romero’s. So she knew he wouldn’t have a problem if dinner wasn’t ready when he got home. In fact, he often told her, even before she’d gone back to work, to let him know if she wanted him to just pick something up for dinner on his way home. After Romero’s grandma had died, Manny and Max had done their best to raise him, but he’d told her about the many pizzas and buckets of chicken or even frozen chicken wings they’d thrown in the oven for dinner. Having dinner at the table every night with her family was something Isabel remembered so fondly from when she was growing up. It was her family’s bonding time, and she’d been a stickler for wanting to instill the tradition in her own kids.
It’d been easy to get them used to it, and the kids seemed to enjoy it as much as she had when she was growing up. Only now it was getting harder to have it all as perfect as she liked it to be with the rolls and salad and even dessert ready just in time.
To top it off, with the holidays looming, she had added errands to run. Buying all the Christmas stuff for the kids was something she’d normally done when Amanda was in school and she could drop off Romeo with her mom or sisters for a few hours. With both of them in school now, this year should’ve been easier. Instead, her working during their time in school was making everything feel overwhelming.
It was shameful to think not only had her mom done the same thing with four kids but she’d done it all while working full-time for years and years. Now here Isabel was working part-time for just a few weeks, and already it was beginning to feel like too much.
But there was no way she was admitting this may’ve been a mistake. She knew it had everything to do with her need for everything to be as meticulous as ever despite her having less time to do it. Her only consolation was that Romero would be all for her quitting. Still, it was humiliating to think she couldn’t hang in there for at least a few months. What kind of example would she be setting for her kids if she quit this quickly?
Another consolation was that the job itself was gratifying. Elliot was more than pleasant to work with, and it was nice for a change to be able to engage in adult conversation for the better part of her days. She remembered there was a time in her life when both kids were very little and she lived for the playdates with Valerie and the other girls so she could get some adult conversation instead of just baby talk when she was home alone with the kids all day. It wasn’t so bad anymore now that they were a little older, but it was still nice to discuss things that even some of the adults in her life didn’t get. So being in a university setting was the ideal job for her, and discussing these things with Elliot was incredibly refreshing.
She was even beginning to get over the initial awkwardness of being alone in the classroom with him whenever he dismissed his class early. He gave her the option to leave early as well and would still give her credit for her full four hours. But it usually worked out if she stuck around because they would work on lectures together. He’d let her take the floor a few times already during his lectures and said whenever she felt up to it she could have at it and do the entire thing on her own.
She still wasn’t feeling that confident. Elliot was one of those professors she remembered from her early days in college. He had a gift. He was so confident when he spoke, and he just had that it factor when it came to speaking to his students. Some of his lectures were absolutely mesmerizing and thought-provoking. How packed each one of his classes was, was proof of how captivating he could be. Isabel knew from experience only the professors as charismatic as Elliot were the ones whose classes stayed as full as his did throughout the entire semester. She didn’t know it for a fact, but she was fairly certain his classes were probably the first to get filled, and there was very likely a long waiting list to get in.
The thought of giving a full lecture as he sat and listened to her was actually a bit daunting, even though the few times he’d given her the floor he’d called her a natural. She knew he was just being kind. While she did feel confident and did notice she had everyone’s full attention the little time she got up to speak, she knew she wasn’t nearly as good as he was.
Today was one of those days he’d finished up early and he’d excused his students, leaving them alone to go over lectures, she imagined. They’d remained in the empty lecture hall long after the students had been dismissed, discussing what he’d spoken of today.
Though she’d never tell Romero because without a doubt he’d be beyond annoyed by it, this was by far what she considered the biggest perk of her job. When she first told Romero she’d decided to get her master’s in political science, he’d teased her that she’d done so to spite his uncles. They’d made no secret of their abhorrence of anything political. As far as they were concerned, all politicians were crooks and liars.
Isabel had no interest in running for office. But just like her late father who’d dabbed in politics a bit, she too had always had an interest in political science. And since politics was considered a touchy subject unless she was discussing it privately with one of her siblings or her mom—who were about the only people she knew who were even interested in discussing politics at all—she didn’t get to discuss it often. Being able to do so in length with someone who spoke as eloquently as Elliot, was probably her favorite part of the job.
“I actually agree with you that health care reform as is, is a bit flawed, but for business owners like my husband and me, and even his uncles who’ve always been self-employed as well, some kind of healthcare reform was needed and should’ve come a long time ago,” Isabel said as Elliot listened intently. “Fortunately, both my husband’s and his uncles’ businesses are doing very well, so health insurance is not an issue, but there are too many self-employed citizens out there who aren’t as fortunate, and most of those people would be uninsured if it weren’t for the laws that were recently passed.”
“You mentioned that before about your husband being self-employed.” He eyed her curiously. “Security firm, right?”
“Yes.” She nodded. “And he stays real busy.”
“I take it you two met in college. Was he a business major?”
“No, actually, he didn’t attend college.”
Isabel was long over the idea that her sister had once tried to put in her head that only someone with a college degree could be successful—in her sister’s mind anyway. One of the reasons she knew her sister didn’t voice her opinion much about that anymore was because Romero and his uncles were living proof that her theory couldn’t be further from the truth. While his uncles’ business was very different from Romero’s, even in a weak economy, both businesses were thriving. And she was extremely proud of Romero. He was a self-made man, and even now, the business continued to expand.
“Really?” Elliot seemed genuinely intrigued by this. “Oh wow. So he just started his business all on his own?”
“Yep,” she said proudly. “I mean it wasn’t that simple.”
“Of course, of course,” Elliot agreed quickly. “No business ever is.”
“He had to get certified in numerous things, pass a lot of state and county tests, and build a solid clientele, etc. He still takes exams whenever any of those certifications need to be renewed since the laws change all the time. He’s also a private investigator. The business has expanded extensively since he first started it. Not to brag or anything”—she smiled as he stared at her—“but when I think of how far he’s come, it really is quite impressive that he started what’s become such a big firm all on his own.”
“It does sound impressive,” Elliot agreed again, smiling with her, “and interesting. I imagine there’s never a dull moment.”
“No.” She laughed softly. “He comes home with wild stories all the time.”
“I’ll bet.” Elliot sat even further back in his seat. “So I’m curious. How did you two meet?”
“Mutual friends,” she said, trying not to feel weird about the turn the conversation had taken.
So far most of their conversations had been strictly politics and work-related with a few inquiries about her kids and family. But she supposed this was normal and he was just curious. She had to admit after getting to know him over the past few weeks, even if their conversations had been purely professional, she’d been very impressed with him in more ways than one. Clearly having a PhD in political science and with all the lectures he’d given made him very well-read and well-spoken. Those qualities in a man alone were attractive enough regardless of his looks, but Elliot was all those things and good-looking. She, too, had been curious about why any woman would divorce him.
This was another reason why she was certain there was never an empty seat in lecture hall on the days he lectured. On top of captivating his audience with his well-expressed views, he was also very easy on the eyes. With all he had to offer, there was no doubt’ he was a favorite professor. Isabel had seen it in the admiring eyes of all his female students. So the question of why any woman would divorce such a catch was a curious one, though Isabel didn’t dare ask something so personal.
He smiled, bringing the tip of his reading glasses to his lips. “I thought maybe you two met by way of his job: something interesting like he fell in love with the beautiful woman he was supposed to be investigating.”
Feeling her face flush instantly, she shook her head too quickly. “No, nothing like that,” she said, swallowing hard.
“I’m sorry if that was inappropriate.” He sat up. “I didn’t mean to embarrass you.”
Calling attention to the fact that she was probably beet red now wasn’t helping. “No, don’t worry. I blush really easily,” she said, laughing nervously. “It’s a curse and one of the first things my husband said he’d noticed about me. He’s, uh,” she added, bringing her hand to her face and touching her warm cheek, “still highly entertained by it, actually.”
He stared at her for a moment without saying anything then smiled. “I can see why.”
Their eyes met for a moment too long, and without thinking, she began blurting things out: how her former roommate was dating Romero’s friend at the time and then about meeting him at Alex’s brother’s wedding shower. She even told him how at first she’d been afraid they might be too different. “But I guess it’s true what they say about opposites attracting, because here we are years later, happily married with two kids.”
The moment she said that last part she felt utterly ridiculous. For some stupid reason, she’d felt it necessary to throw that in, but he already knew this! Her face began to warm again as the mortification set in. Did he possibly pick up on the fact that, for an instant there, she thought he needed to be reminded?
Each day there were dozens and dozens of young, pretty, and very likely single girls who sat in awe of their brilliant and very attractive professor. He had to know this—had to know that while it went against school policy to date his students, he still could have his pick of any single girls on campus. Why in the world would he need to be reminded that his assistant was happily married? Just because of his beautiful comment?
Jesus, she was an idiot.
“And they’re probably right,” he said, still staring at her in that way he always had, but somehow it felt different now. “It’s probably why my ex-wife and I couldn’t work things out. We were too much alike. Yet my stubborn heart keeps getting drawn to women like her, women I can talk to for hours on end and never get bored.” He smiled, and again the moment went on a bit too long, but mercifully, he continued before she had to think of a response to that—she had nothing. “My ex-wife is also a professor at a university, only she teaches Women Studies.” He laughed softly now. “You can imagine the discussions she and I had. While some of those discussions could often get heated, it’s what I miss most. Any woman can offer physical pleasure. To me, it’s always been about how a woman can pleasure my mind.”
For the first time since they’d been sitting there talking, there was too long of a moment when neither said anything. Suddenly speechless, Isabel took the moment to check her watch. “Shoot!” she said, standing up quickly. “I gotta go.”
The kids would be out of school in exactly ten minutes, and it normally took her twenty to get there. There was no way she’d make it on time.
After explaining quickly to Elliot she’d completely lost track of time, she darted out of there with her phone already at her ear. “Manny,” she said as soon as he answered. “Is there any way you can pick up the kids from school for me? I completely lost track of time, and I’ll likely be at least ten minutes late. I’m never late. I don’t want them freaking out.”
“Sure thing,” he said quickly and agreed to meet her back home with them.
Relief washed over her, but at the same time something else did too—guilt. Guilt that her heart was still beating at the accelerated rate. And it wasn’t just because she was late.
Most of the drive home she tried in vain to squelch the unreasonable unease and shame of what Elliot’s words had done to her but mostly that she’d gotten so wrapped up in them that she’d momentarily forgotten all about her meticulous schedule.
So she’d slipped. She wouldn’t be the first mom to ever do so. Valerie had been called one time while she was grocery shopping to pick up her kids. Of course, it was an early dismissal on an odd day, and she’d completely forgotten but still. The Morenos still laughed about the time Eric and Sofie had stopped by one of the restaurants in separate cars with the kids. When they’d left, each thought the other had their oldest, who’d run off with the cousins out of sight. Sofie had been home a whole hour when Alex dropped off her daughter, asking if she’d forgotten something. Isabel had never done anything remotely close to that.
There was more to Isabel’s guilty conscience, and she knew it. But another part of her argued that it was silly to feel guilty. Just like when in her haste she’d blurted out her silly reminder that she was happily married, she felt her face flush once again just thinking about it. Elliot hadn’t even called her beautiful. The comment was more his suggesting what he’d imagined Romero had been thinking when they met. That was different, and even if he had called her beautiful, what was the big deal? How long had it been since any man aside from her husband had complimented her that she had to get all frazzled and paranoid about it? She may as well have pointed at her wedding ring and mouthed the words, “I’m very married.”
By the time she got home, she’d actually begun to giggle. Gawd, she was ridiculous. Shaking the guilt off because she’d decided there was no reason for it at all, she almost couldn’t wait to tell Valerie about this now. Her best friend would probably giggle just as whole-heartedly as she’d done once it really sunk in.
Manny walked out her front door when she drove up the driveway, and she smiled big. When she got out, he met her halfway up the walkway, and she greeted him with a hearty hug. “Thank you so much.” She shook her head. “I can’t believe I did that. You know what a stickler I am about punctuality.”
“Yeah, I do.” Manny smiled. “So what happened?
“Oh.” She waved her hand at him. “I just got caught up talking with the professor, and the time just flew.”
They started back up the walk to her porch just as Romeo blew through the front door. “Mom!” He smiled big, holding up a small toy still wrapped in plastic. “Look!”
Isabel bent down and scooped him up in her arms, hugging him tightly and making him laugh when she kissed his warm little cheeks.
“What is it?” she asked as she put him down.
“It’s a Ninja Turtle,” he said, stuffing a few fries in his mouth. “It came in the kid’s meal from McDonald’s.”
Isabel glanced back at Manny, lifting a scolding brow. “They were hungry!” he said, holding open his arms.
“I got the apple slices with mine,” Amanda said from behind the screen door, “but Uncle Manny let Romeo get the fries.”
“Did you just rat me out, kid?” Manny asked.
Amanda giggled and took off running when Manny pretended to start off after her. Isabel let Manny off the hook with a grateful smile. Everyone knew how she felt about her kids eating too much fast food. They were only allowed to have it sparingly. This was Friday, and he had gotten her out of a jam, so she’d let Manny slide.
“Thanks again, Manny. You have no idea how grateful I am that you work so close to the kids’ school.”
“Any time,” Manny said, pulling his keys out of his pocket.
“You’re welcome to hang out if you want. Fridays Romero usually gets home earlier than normal,” she said as she walked up the porch stairs. “He should be home in an hour or so.”
“Nah, I gotta get back to the bar,” he said, already walking to his car then turning back. “But I will be by tomorrow. I got something for the kids.”
“What is it?” Romeo asked, his eyes full of excitement.
Manny winked at him. “You’ll have to wait until then.”
Isabel shook her head. Manny and Max did this every year. This was probably one of the many gifts they’d bought the kids for Christmas, but like kids, they couldn’t wait until Christmas, so they brought things over for weeks before the actual holiday.
By the time Romero got home that evening, Isabel was well over the guilt she’d begun to feel about Elliot. She’d since spoken to Valerie, and as expected, they both got a good laugh about her blurting out that she was happily married just because of his beautiful comment.
“Good Lord, Isabel”—Valerie had laughed—“please tell me you’re not gonna show up Monday morning wearing your wedding photo around your neck.”
Even Romero hadn’t commented much on her having to call Manny to pick up the kids when Amanda told him about it. Though Isabel had every intention of telling him, her daughter, as usual, just beat her to it.
“Daddy, we got McDonald’s for lunch,” she chimed the moment he walked into the living room.
Romero had turned to Isabel with a surprised smirk. “Really? Mom let you guys have fast food?”
“No, Uncle Manny bought us some after he picked up us up from school.”
Before he could ask why Manny had picked them up, Romeo had run up to him with his Ninja Turtle. “And look what I got!”
Romero knelt down and examined the toy with a smile. “That’s pretty cool.” He’d glanced back up at Isabel, seemingly unfazed. “Manny picked them up?”
“Yeah, I was running late and didn’t wanna risk not making it in time. So I called him and asked if he could.”
Romeo took advantage of his dad’s kneeling down to jump on him, and the wrestling match ensued. Romero and the kids rolled around the front room, and Isabel went back to finishing up dinner. Romero didn’t ask why she’d been running late nor did he bring it up all afternoon.
That evening both her sisters stopped by to chat for a little while, and both had agreed with her when she told them about her conversation with Elliot. So it was official. She’d obviously been buried for the last several years if her reaction to a simple compliment from a man was to blurt out that she was happily married with kids. She’d been silly to think even for a moment to make more out of it. Though she’d been secretly glad Romero hadn’t asked more about the incident because, despite the girls agreeing her reaction had been silly and uncalled for, Romero knew her too well. He always said he could read every one of her expressions, and she’d been worried he might read something in her eyes when she told him.
Silly or not she’d hung out after Elliot’s lecture so that they could work. While she did admit to her sisters and Valerie that instead of working they’d spent the whole time talking—which she didn’t think there was anything wrong with since technically they’d been discussing his lecture, so it was still work-related—she did leave out the part about the conversation getting a little personal.
Most notably, she didn’t mention to any of them, not her sister or even Valerie, about his other comment. It was less obvious than an all-out compliment, yet it felt far more inappropriate. It wasn’t just that he’d admitted his heart was stubbornly drawn to women like his ex-wife—a professor whom he could talk to for hours without ever getting bored. It was the way he’d looked at her when he’d said it.
She reasoned that she could be wrong—it could be just an innocent comment—yet her gut said otherwise. Isabel knew she’d done nothing wrong today. But the fact remained Elliot chose to mention this tidbit about his preference in women after Isabel had been sitting there for nearly an hour—pleasuring his mind.