Chapter Eleven

 

 

I hold my breath as Tavarr approaches. He snares my gaze in his, and I instinctively look at my feet. I don’t want to anger him. Vonn used to slap me whenever I stared into his eyes, even when I was crying and pleading with him to stop hurting me. To my mortification, my lower lip starts trembling and tears burn in my eyes.

Fuck.

I swallow hard and blink rapidly, not wanting to appear weak in front of the Kleaxian who intends to claim me as soon as the king will permit.

His shadow blocks out the moonlight. He’s standing over me, and his presence is suffocating. I feel betrayed by Prince Kenan for leaving me alone with Tavarr. Maybe that’s why I’m almost crying.

I hear a clicking noise and it takes me a few seconds to realize it’s the sound of my teeth chattering because I’m shaking so hard. Wrapping my arms around my center, I continue to stare at my feet, angry at myself for cowing in submission before a Kleaxian male, only moments after I had planned to be brave and fight. But in my defense, I hadn’t anticipated having to face Tavarr again this evening.

He’s taller than Vonn, much broader in the chest too, and though I can’t be sure, I suspect he’s older. The chandelier above the dinner table had highlighted a dusting of white in his otherwise stark black locks, making him look distinguished.

If he’s indeed older than Vonn, why isn’t he already mated?

His hand comes up. I flinch and step back, but he doesn’t strike me. Instead, he gently places a finger beneath my chin and forces me to stare up into his dark purple depths.

My heart skips, and despite myself, a pang of heat resonates deep in my womanly core.

His nostrils flare, as if he senses the unwanted desire I’m trying desperately to repress. His brother tried to kill me, and I think there’s a good chance he wants to do the same. What the fuck is wrong with me?

“No tears,” he says in a deep guttural voice, surprising me. His accent is heavy, but he apparently knows a little English. He lifts his other hand up, then with his thumbs wipes away the tears that I didn’t even realize had trickled down my cheeks.

His gentleness astounds me, as does the glimmer of kindness and concern in his otherworldly gaze.

Could I be wrong about him? Could he truly be appalled by his brother’s actions, just as Prince Kenan promised?

His reddish skin is hot and my flesh tingles as he finishes wiping the moisture from my cheeks. He cups my face and steps closer, so near the heat of his body wafts onto mine like a sensual caress. I promptly flush from head to toe. It doesn’t help that he’s breathtakingly handsome, with a strong square jaw, high cheekbones, full kissable lips, and dark beautiful features.

“No more hurt,” he says, stroking my hair. A wave of endorphins rush my scalp, and I find myself leaning into his touch. My lip quivers again, because I haven’t shared a moment this intimate with anyone in a long fucking time. I hadn’t realized how starved I was for affection until now. I pray it’s not a trick.

I try to detach myself from the attraction I feel toward Tavarr and get a read on him. Is his heart clouded by anger and darkness? Does he really mean it when he says “no more hurt?”

If I plead with him to walk away and not claim me until the end of the year, will he understand what I’m saying? Or even if he does, will he refuse to wait because of the fierce mating urge he’s experiencing? I think of Prince Kenan’s description of Tavarr’s attraction to me, of how he thinks I’m the most beautiful female he’s ever seen and senses I have a kind heart. No man has paid me such a compliment before, and I flush all over again in remembrance.

“Why shaking?” His deep, rumbling brogue makes my pussy clench. I want to back away, but at the same time I long to lean into him, craving his closeness.

I decide to be honest. “I don’t want to be claimed by a Kleaxian male, especially by you, as you are the brother of Vonn and I worry you will hurt me.” I pause to clear my emotion-clogged throat. “I had planned to ask Prince Kenan to instead allow me to remain in Zandek’s household as a slave, like Joanna. Please don’t claim me. Or at the very least, please don’t petition the king to claim me earlier than the year the prince gave me.”

Confusion enters his gaze, and I suspect he’s not fluent enough in my language to understand all I’ve said. But surely, he must sense my hesitation to mate with him. Kleaxians are an intelligent race. Can he not already understand why he’s the last male in the universe I would wish to be claimed by?

The nighttime insects buzz louder and the breeze picks up, blowing my hair forward. Tavarr takes his time tucking every last errant strand of my long locks behind my ears, letting his fingertips trail over my cheeks and neck in the process. I shiver and repress a moan of pleasure. His delicious, woodsy masculine scent is like my own personal aphrodisiac, beckoning and seducing.

He leans down and his hot breath tickles my ear. His hands move to my waist, and the urge to rest my head on his chest becomes overwhelming, but I remain completely still, not daring to encourage him. I want him to release me and walk away, don’t I?

“Mate soon,” he says. “Katrina.” My name is a low, sexy growl that rumbles from his throat. He starts rubbing my back and buries his face in the side of my neck, his tense body shuddering as he takes a long inhale. One step forward, and the unmistakable bulge of his erection presses against my stomach.

I gasp and try to back away, and to my surprise, Tavarr allows me to escape his embrace. I pause in the middle of the sitting area with a hand on a chair for balance, breathing hard and not taking my eyes off him, in case he decides to once again close the space between us.

The air crackles with tension, and it’s as if there’s a cord attaching us to one another, urging me to amble forward into his arms. The pull is undeniable. But I remind myself how clouded my judgment was with Harry, because I’d been so attracted to him and seduced by his charm. I can’t let that happen again.

I need to keep my guard up, shield myself from Tavarr.

It’s so fucking difficult though, when despite all that’s happened, my heart is crying out to take a chance, to trust that maybe…just maybe…this male Kleaxian isn’t like his brother at all.

Tavarr takes a deep breath and slowly crosses the distance between us. When he reaches me, his body vibrates with more tension than before. Sweat glistens on his muscular arms and forehead, trickling down his temples. The night is humid, but thanks to the breeze I haven’t broken a sweat yet. I wonder if he really does have a fever, all because of a biological force to mate with his brother’s widow.

His eyes are dark pools of compassion. I normally wouldn’t want anyone to feel sorry for me, but if he’s being genuine in his interactions, I can’t deny that I’m not grateful for his understanding. He’s staring at me as if he knows me, as if we are long lost lovers finally reunited for a second chance at happiness. I almost snort at the thought. Maybe the painkillers the doctor gave me weeks ago are still in my system. Surely I’m not thinking clearly.

He steps closer and cups the side of my face. I instinctively lean into his touch. His palm is warm and tough, his skin leathery. Kleaxians possess coarser, thicker skin than humans, but somehow the contrast of his rough hand caressing my much softer skin lulls me into a calm trance.

My eyes flutter shut and I breath in his wondrous male scent, a tantalizing mix of forest and ocean. A smile touches my lips, because underneath the masculinity, I smell the same soap that’s dispensed in the shower in my private bathroom. It reminds me of sunscreen, which in turn makes me think of the beach and vacation and lazy summer days. Calm, happy days. No fear and no pain. No worries at all.

“Claim soon,” he whispers, his voice gravelly with an edge of desperation. His hand starts trembling and he releases me, backing away and heading for the stairs.

It’s weird, so fucking weird, because I open my mouth and almost invite him to sit with me for a while, under the star-encrusted sky. But I soon clamp my lips shut and remind myself that he’s Vonn’s brother, and no matter how delicious he smells or how much kindness gleams in his beautiful dark purple eyes, I must remain wary of his intentions.

“Goodbye, Katrina,” he says, nodding at me before turning to descend the staircase.

Once I’m alone, I sink onto the nearest chair and hug my center, trying to calm my nerves and make sense of what just happened. Every time I blink, I see Tavarr’s magnificent eyes, peering down at me with a mixture of a hunger and kindness. I see his tense, muscular form towering over me, gleaming with sweat under the light of the moons and stars.

Even though I don’t want to think of Vonn, I can’t help but compare my former mate to his brother. Tavarr’s skin is a slightly darker shade of red, he’s taller and brawnier than Vonn, and his hair is thicker and longer. Vonn’s eyes always flashed with hatred and disgust, but I’d glimpsed no negative emotions in Tavarr’s gaze. If the two were standing side-by-side, I still wouldn’t have suspected them to be kin. Tavarr looks more like Prince Kenan or Zandek than he does his own brother.

Relief wells in my heart.

I release a long exhale and stare at the moons.

At least Tavarr and Vonn don’t bear much, if any, physical resemblance to one another. I hope I won’t be reminded of Vonn when I’m looking at Tavarr. I want to forget Vonn, as much as I want to forget Harry. Both of them took from me and hurt me, battering me, one physically and the other mentally, until I no longer recognized myself in the mirror.

Until I no longer felt like myself.

Until sometimes it seemed I was watching events unfold as if they were happening to another woman, because surely those horrible things couldn’t be happening to me.

I give my head a shake to dispel the dark turn my thoughts have taken, and I stand up and inhale the fragrant night air and venture toward the rooftop garden, situated between the large solar panels. The massive red flowers that we often eat in our salads are in full bloom, planted amongst other smaller vegetables. I bend down and breathe in the pleasant floral scent of the tallest flower, marveling at its beauty in the moonlight.

Tallia is a breathtaking planet, filled with exotic species of plants and animals. It’s an absolute paradise, and I suppose if I’m to be stranded on an alien world with no hope of returning to Earth, at least it’s not a fiery hellhole, or a planet as crowded and polluted as my homeworld.

“Katrina?”

It’s Helena.

I turn around and give her a calm smile.

She’s fretted over me during these last few weeks, not quite as much as Joanna, but I still don’t want her worrying over me. I’m healed. Completely healed. I tell myself that every day, even during the moments I’m overcome with nerves and weakness, almost as often as I used to think about running and hiding. Because if I keep thinking it, maybe it will come true. Maybe there will come a day when I don’t have to fight the urge to keep my eyes down around Kleaxians, out of fear that I’ll be slapped across the face.

“Our dinner guests have gone home. Laylah says to tell you goodbye and that she hopes to see you again soon. Um, did Tavarr come up here before he left?”

“Yes. He did.” I pause and study her pensive expression. “I suppose Joanna has filled you in about his true identity?”

She gives a solemn nod. “Joanna told me all that Zell told her. I’m so sorry. I-I don’t think Tavarr means you any harm, though. If he did, Prince Kenan and Zandek would likely sense it. They interrogated him pretty well after you left the dinner table.” She smiles. “He and Zandek almost came to blows before the prince intervened. I don’t speak their language, but after witnessing that and then having Zandek summarize the conversation quickly for me, I think Tavarr genuinely feels the urge to claim you and wants to make amends for his brother’s heinous crimes.”

I draw in a deep breath and give her a direct look. “All Kleaxian males physically punish their mates, on occasion, don’t they, Helena?” When she doesn’t answer right away, I continue, “I can’t be sure, but I think a few weeks ago I heard Zandek punishing you. Are-are you okay?”

She walks closer, until I can peer straight into her pretty blue eyes. She has that love-struck look about her, that calm dreamy spark in her gaze that seems to come from her affection for her mate.

“It is true that Kleaxian males punish their mates on occasion, Katrina. Probably all of them, though I can’t say for sure. But what I do know is that when Zandek punishes me, it’s because I’ve broken a rule and he sees it as his duty to correct me for my infractions. In Kleaxian culture, if a male doesn’t punish his female when she errs, it means the male cares nothing for his female. That is how Zandek has explained it to me. I know I probably sound brainwashed to you, and at first I was terrified of my mate, especially that first time he punished me when I tried to run away the day after he claimed me, but I’m no longer afraid of him. The few times he has punished me were not so bad, and I promise you I am fine. I know this might sound crazy, but I’m happy and I’m very much in love with Zandek. Yes, he spanks me when I’m naughty, like if I break a specific rule, show him disrespect, or tell a lie, but it’s just that—a spanking. He, um, used a belt on me once, but only once. The time I ran away. He doesn’t beat me with his fists or slap me around, and because of Prince Kenan’s royal decree that prohibits harsh punishments for human females, it’s not likely that other human women are receiving more than spankings now. Am-am I making sense?”

“What kind of rules does Zandek expect you to follow?” I suppose, knowing firsthand how badly a Kleaxian could hurt his female mate, a spanking isn’t the worst thing in the world. Vonn punched, kicked, and whipped me, but he never spanked me. But then he wasn’t punishing me for a specific infraction as Zandek has punished Helena. He kept hurting me for the same imagined crime over and over again, thinking I deserved nothing but pain and misery for my association with Harry.

“Well,” she says, biting her lip as her face flushes, “I am not allowed to, um, touch myself without permission. I’m not to attempt fashioning undergarments of any kind. I’m not allowed to leave the house without asking, and in most cases I must be in Zandek’s company and wearing the leash, though there have been a few times Joanna and one of the servants have accompanied me on quick trips to visit a neighbor while taking a path behind the houses, out of sight from the market and the main road.” She looks up and taps her chin, thinking. “I shouldn’t talk back to Zandek, that’s for sure. Also, on the nights he wants me to sleep in the cage, I am not allowed to pout over it.

“Listen, I am sorry that Prince Kenan can no longer legally select a mate for you, but I know he is interested in your welfare. He’s frustrated Tavarr doesn’t want to wait a year to claim you—well, frustrated that Tavarr can’t wait is more like it, if I’m understanding his biological urge to claim you correctly. If the prince thought Tavarr meant you the same harm as Vonn, he would travel to Kleax-Lul tomorrow and personally challenge Tavarr’s petition to the king. That’s what Zandek has told me.” She approaches and puts an arm around me. “Come on, let’s go drink some more wine and listen to some music with Joanna. Everything will work out. I promise.”

“I’m warning you, my life has a history of not working out.”

She chuckles and leads me downstairs to the parlor, and I soon lose myself in the seductive rhythm of an ancient Kleaxian composition and two strong glasses of wine.

There’s a very good chance that by this time tomorrow, I will already belong to Tavarr.

Since escape doesn’t appear to be an option anymore, I’m determined to enjoy my last few hours of freedom.