Keira spent most of the next day in a whirlwind of activity that did nothing to distract her from her tangled thoughts. Dmitri said he loved me. She wanted to believe it. She wanted to believe it so much, she practically vibrated from that need. If she were any other woman—if he were any other man—she would believe with no qualms.
But she wasn’t any other woman. She was only herself.
Dmitri wasn’t any other man. He was manipulative and ambitious and surprisingly tender, all wrapped up in a complicated package.
So instead of feeling the bliss of the newly in love, she kept deconstructing every moment they’d ever spent together, trying to see it from different angles. Dmitri was so damn smart, so damn calculating, and it wasn’t like he’d suddenly stopped being those things now that he claimed to care about her.
More than anything, she wanted to call someone to talk it out. Charlie was quickly becoming one of her best friends, but the woman didn’t exactly have much in the way of relationship experience—aside from Aiden—and her loathing of Dmitri would color any advice. Keira’s sister Carrigan wasn’t much better, but…
No. She had to figure this one out herself.
As Mark had said when she’d ordered him out of the house—she wasn’t an O’Malley anymore. She had made that choice.
She took an extra-long shower, wishing she could wash away her confusion as easily. Stupid of her to be so focused on it when they had all hell breaking loose in a few short hours, but she couldn’t stop.
She shut off the water and closed her eyes, letting the cool air chill her. You can do this. Shelve the feelings talk until after you figure out whether you’re all going to die.
“Keira?”
“Just thinking.” Obsessing. She turned to find Dmitri leaning against the corner where the shower met the rest of the bathroom, well out of the way of any potential water. He wore his usual slacks and button-down, so he must have come up from the office. Now was the time to put on the brave face and pretend she wasn’t hopelessly in over her head, but she just couldn’t do it.
“I want a drink.” Keira held up her hand. “I’m not going to have one, but I’m overwhelmed and freaked out, and part of me is so damn sure that if I just drown my sorrows a bit, it will make everything better.” She could almost taste the vodka on her tongue if she concentrated.
He crossed to her, and that was when she noticed that he was barefoot. She’d never paid much attention to his feet before, but the big toe on his left foot was a bit crooked. That slight imperfection somehow made him more attractive, if that was at all possible. Dmitri pulled her into his arms, and hugged her tightly to him. “It will be okay.”
“I’m all wet.” She didn’t struggle, though. Instead, she buried her face in his chest and let him comfort her. This feels so real.
“I’ll survive.” He let his chin rest on the top of her head. “Is tonight bothering you? Or what happened last night?”
“I’m just worried across the board.” It was the truth, though not the complete truth.
He gave her a squeeze and released her. “After tonight, the reception will be over. We’ll have made our public announcement and we can get back to us.”
She tried to dredge up a smile. “Okay.” There was no point in saying that the reception was the least of her worries. He knew. It was still easier to focus on the guests that were about to descend on their household than the fact that Alethea and Mae could strike at any time.
Dmitri, damn him, saw right through her. He took her hand and drew her out of the shower. She let him dry her off with one of his ridiculously luxurious towels because it felt good to have him taking care of her. But when he rose to face her, she couldn’t keep it buttoned up any longer. “I don’t know what’s real.”
He nodded as if she’d confirmed something he’d suspected. “You think I told you that I love you to keep you in line.”
“It sounds extra evil when you say it like that.” She hugged the towel to her chest as if she wasn’t shivering and naked in front of him.
“For God’s sake.” He disappeared into the closet and came back with the same robe she’d co-opted that first week. He dropped it over her shoulders and watched her until she slipped her arms into it and tied it at the waist. It helped the shivers, if not her state of mind. Dmitri crossed his arms over his chest. “Explain why I would lie to you when we were finally coexisting comfortably.”
He didn’t have to make it sound so crazy. It wasn’t. She lifted her chin. “You like me nice and compliant, which is a whole lot more likely if I’m all goofy over being in love with you.”
“While you have a point, that’s not a low I would ever hit.”
She wanted to believe that, and she didn’t trust him because she so desperately wanted to believe it. That didn’t make sense, even in her own head.
Keira rubbed her eyes. “I’m scared.” It felt like the words were ripped from her, but once she started, she couldn’t stop. “It feels too good to be true, and that scares the shit out of me. I know you’re not some Prince Charming type, and I’m sure as hell not a princess, but it doesn’t seem possible that we could end up in love after everything. There has to be some plot, some manipulation, something going on. That’s our world. It’s not the one where people get happily ever afters.”
He cupped her face and stroked his thumbs along her cheekbones. “What if it was?”
Her mouth went dry and her heart tried to beat its way out of her chest. “It will blow up in our faces,” she whispered.
“Mozhet byt’.” He shrugged. “And maybe Alethea will manage to outmaneuver us and we won’t survive the day, the week, the month. You can’t live in fear of the bad. You have to grasp the good with both hands and fight for it.” He paused. “Fight for me.”
“Is that some kind of code for a game you want me to play to win your affection?”
He rolled his eyes. “Moya koroleva, you already possess my affection. I merely want you not to allow fear to get the best of you. Stand by my side. Fight with me. When we are sure of our victory, we can do whatever it takes to make you feel better about our current situation.”
He was handling her, but he was also being completely transparent about it, so she couldn’t be too pissed. Keira sighed. “I should have chosen a better time to freak out about it, huh?”
“I highly doubt you chose it at all.” He kissed her, quick and light, a reassuring touch. “Love was unexpected for me, as well. There’s nothing wrong with reacting honestly.”
He didn’t quite stress the word honestly, but she felt it all the same. Keira took a breath, and then another. “I should get dressed.”
“Do you need help?”
“No, I’m fine.” She would have said it even if she wasn’t. He was already tweaked out about her back—he didn’t need to know the bruises hurt like a motherfucker and she had a hard time twisting in some directions. It would just start another argument, and seeing as how Keira couldn’t skip this party even if she wanted to, it was all a moot point.
He gave her a long look, and finally nodded. “Pavel will stick close to you.” He kissed her again and released her. “We don’t have much time.”
A quick glance at the clock had her cursing. An hour shouldn’t be the end of the world, but when it came to getting glammed up, Keira needed all the time she could get. At least if she was focusing on her lipstick, she wouldn’t be focused on the fact that, in sixty minutes, she’d be face-to-face with her family and Dmitri’s allies.
She wasn’t sure which of them she dreaded seeing more.
* * *
Dmitri took a precious ten minutes to go over the plan with Pavel and Alexei one last time. He had no logical reason to think the attack would come tonight, but his instincts said it would. Alethea was too smart to miss the opportunity to cut him off at the knees publically. His allies and enemies knowing that he was vulnerable would do just as much damage as anything she could physically do.
They were as ready as they could be.
His men had barely closed the door when it opened again. Aiden O’Malley strode into Dmitri’s office as if he owned it, but for once he was blessedly alone. He stopped too close, his green eyes furious. “Where is she?”
“Not locked in the tower, since I don’t actually have a tower in this place.”
His jaw tightened. “That shit is not funny, Romanov.”
“On the contrary, if I didn’t find your insistence on the idea of Keira as a damsel in distress amusing, it would be infuriating.” For once, he found no joy in Aiden’s aggravation. They didn’t have time for that song and dance—not tonight. He needed Aiden O’Malley at the top of his game, and he wouldn’t be if he was so distracted by his little sister. “She chose, Aiden. Respect it, or lose her.”
“You mean you’ll take her.”
Family blurred the lines beyond recognition. Dmitri understood that, even as he wanted to shake some sense into the man. “No,” he said gently. “What I mean is that Keira herself will draw the line in the sand. She’s not the same baby sister you seem to be clinging to—she hasn’t been for some time.”
Aiden stared at him for several long moments and finally growled. “This conversation might be put on hold until we can take care of the Eldridges, but it’s not over.”
Dmitri couldn’t make the man see reason, but for Keira’s sake, he was willing to try. A little. He and Keira had found the beginnings of a balance, but they were by no means out of the woods. She might love Dmitri, but she didn’t trust him completely. That was something that could be addressed with time—actions spoke louder than words and the like. Having her family continue to insist that she didn’t know what she wanted would wear on her, and it might possibly send her back to the bottle.
He couldn’t risk it.
Dmitri lowered his voice so the O’Malley had to lean in to hear him. “Make no mistake, Aiden, I don’t want a war with you. That was never the goal.”
“Easy to say that now.”
“I am not finished.” He strove to keep control and not throttle this fool. “I will not take Romanov to war against O’Malley and the others in Boston, but if you harm Keira with this insistence that her choices are invalid, I will carve out your fucking heart and force you to eat it.”
Aiden blinked, then blinked again. Understanding dawned across his face, and the change might have been amusing under other circumstances. “You love her.”
Dmitri didn’t dignify that by addressing it. “I will do what it takes to ensure she’s safe and happy—and that includes removing you permanently from her life if it becomes necessary. You had her on the road to drinking herself to death and living in misery, and you never once pulled your head out of your ass to realize how close you were to losing her. I will not make the same mistake.”
Aiden rocked back on his heels. “I’ll take that into consideration.”
He let the subject of Keira go. If her brother was willing to listen to reason long enough to put it on the back burner, Dmitri could do no less. As long as Aiden didn’t fuck things up for him tonight, the rest would fall where it may. “Finding Alethea would have been more effective if we had worked together.”
“You’re right.” Aiden scrubbed a hand over his face. “We should have been able to find her before now.”
“She’s being careful and not leaving a trail.” Dmitri hesitated. Although he always played his cards close to his chest, there was one factor of the upcoming scenario that Aiden needed to know about. “John Finch contacted me.”
“You’re joking.”
“Hardly.” Dmitri leaned against his desk and crossed his arms over his chest. “He’s been trying to get enough evidence to bring me down for years. I’m aware of it. He knows I’m aware of it. It’s a game we play, because they’ll never find anything incriminating, but he’s too proud to admit that.”
“What’s that have to do with anything?”
He held on to his patience through sheer force of will. If Alethea attacked, having Aiden and the rest of the O’Malleys on his side would be invaluable. “Someone has been interfering with the cameras they have set up. It’s happened several times over the last couple days, all for approximately five to ten minutes. It’s not my doing, which means someone else wants access to this house without the eye of the government on them.”
“Why the fuck would he tell you that…” He stilled. “Does he honestly want us to believe this is for Charlie? He already made his priorities painfully clear when it came to her versus his job.”
Dmitri crossed his arms over his chest. “Have you seen him since the events at the Eldridge warehouse?”
“No. He’s called Charlie a couple times, but she’s not ready to see or talk to him.”
That lined up with what Charlie had told Keira—and the desperation he’d seen lurking in John Finch’s eyes. “You know that saying that you don’t know what you have until you lose it? Finch is old. His career has an expiration date on it, though it’s not for years yet. He might have been disappointed with his so-called disgraced daughter, but she was still his daughter. And now it comes out that she was never a dirty cop and she removes herself from his life in one fell swoop?” He shrugged one shoulder. “He wasn’t able to protect her—not from the dirty cops who got her kicked off the force and not from Mae Eldridge. He couldn’t even ensure that Mae stayed locked up until her trial. He’s a smart man. He knows Mae will want to finish what she started, and he knows that the Eldridges would see this reception as too tempting to ignore. All their enemies in one place? Even if Alethea could resist, Mae won’t be able to.”
Aiden’s expression might as well have been stone, not a single one of his thoughts flickering through his eyes. “This is all just theory.”
“It’s theory grounded in fact.”
Aiden finally dropped into the chair. “If I were Alethea Eldridge, I’d attack tonight. Maybe not something direct, but I’d do it to prove you aren’t strong enough to protect your guests, or your people.”
“That would be my play as well.” He sank into the chair next to Aiden. No power plays. No trying to avoid the fact that they were equals. From the way the man’s green eyes widened ever so slightly, Aiden recognized the symbolism. Dmitri leaned forward. “I’m reasonably confident I can repel whatever she throws at me, but we need to stop fucking around. I don’t want Boston.”
Aiden’s expression gave nothing away. “I don’t want New York.”
“Then now’s the time to decide—are we going to cling to our tangled past and bring up the bullshit moves we’ve made against each other every time we interact?” He sat back. “Or are we going to put it all aside and focus on the future? You’ve seen what can be accomplished when the three power players in Boston stopped fighting and became true allies. Be my ally in truth, Aiden. Give me your word that you’ll stop the plots against me, and I’ll return the favor.”
The moment stretched out between them. Romanov hadn’t gone into this conversation intending to shelve his history with the O’Malleys, but the more he spoke with Aiden, the clearer it became that he could never make Keira choose. As long as they fought, she would be torn between them. She loved her family. She’d never stop loving her family. He’d never ask that of her.
The only option left was the one he’d laid before Aiden.
The O’Malley stared at him a long time. “I don’t trust you.”
“You don’t have to. Trust that I’m willing to put Keira before any blows to my pride and reputation that you’ve delivered.”
“I’ll consider it.”
While he wanted an immediate agreement, Dmitri knew Aiden well enough to know it wasn’t in the realm of possibility. In the other man’s place, he’d do the same. He permitted himself a smile. “That’s all I ask.”
Aiden finally nodded. “Walk me through the plan.”