For one short moment, I’d had everything I ever wanted. Emi had been mine… warm and sweet and beautiful in my arms. The memory of holding her, being inside her, and feeling her powerful climax had only left me wanting more. So much more.

But in a flash the moment was gone, like losing Anna all over again. Except this time the pain was far worse. I knew now, too late, that what I’d had with Anna had only been youthful infatuation. Seeing Emi, curled up and sleeping in my bed, had changed everything. I wanted her. All of her. Not just her body… and her delicious tempting flesh, but her thoughts and her dreams… her sweetness. Her heart.

I had watched her sleeping, aching to hold her one last time in my own bed, in my own home, where we could have the privacy… the intimacy that I finally craved. I’d never expected to want those things again. But I did. And all because of her. It had been sweet… bittersweet… to feel that desire, that hunger for closeness again.

But I’d climbed in beside her and awakened her, knowing those dreams could never be, knowing full well how everything between us would end. With truth… and anger. With loss. Because of what I’d done… because of who I was. Every beat of my heart had felt like a punishment. But I’d done what I’d had to do, to set her free of me. I’d hurt her enough, though it had never been my intention. Giving her the truth and letting her go were the only ways I had left…

To show her I loved her.

* * *

“Where are you? We need to talk. Now.”

I heard Sutton swallow on the other end of the line. I’d spent hours driving simply for the sake of something to do, thinking about all the choices that had brought us to this point. I didn’t give a shit anymore, whether Sutton wanted to cooperate. If I had to, I would end it all for him.

“I’m in the office,” he replied unsteadily. I shoved the car into a higher gear and hit the gas hard. “You did good last night. The lawyers finally found Pam’s price. She’s agreed to sign a statement that she just had too much to drink… and she retracted her accusations…”

“Fuck you, Sutton,” I shot out, hitting the freeway and speeding up even more. “You know goddamned well I had nothing to do with that.” I ground the gears and the engine whined. “I talked to her, alright. But not about silence or payoffs or fucking statements. I told the woman the truth. And I fucking apologized, for what little it was worth. I told her I would do whatever it took to make this right, not just for her, but for all the women over the years, Sutton. It took a goddamned long time to catch up with us, but it’s finally here. I’m doing this with you or without you, but I’m not hiding anymore. Not my shit, and not yours.”

I pulled into the parking garage, tires squealing, and slammed the car into park. Ignoring the elevator and taking the stairs two at a time, I held onto the phone, listening to Sutton’s breathing as he struggled to form a reply.

“Okay…,” he said, finally. “I hear you… You want to shut down the competition.” His voice was slow, careful. “You’ve wanted out for a long time… you don’t want the risks anymore…”

“I am out… I’ve been out,” I growled, irritated by his placating tone. “And it’s over. No more lies, no more cover-ups. We’re owning up to our shit. All of it. I’m issuing a fucking public apology. It’s what I promised Pam last night, and likely the reason she backed down and went along with your lawyers. Because I promised a formal acknowledgement that women like her had been used… and hurt…” I reached the floor where Sutton had his office. My breathing was hard and fast. I shoved the door open, phone still in hand, and stared into his pale face.

“It’ll ruin us,” he said, letting his hand and his phone drop to his side. “We built an empire and this is going to ruin us… It can’t happen… I won’t allow it. You’ll have a fucking war on your hands, Chase…”

I threw my own phone aside and it skittered across the wood floor and shattered against the wall. “It’s a small enough price to pay,” I replied coolly, “for the damage we’ve done.” I sighed, feeling some of the weight begin to lift from my shoulders. If I had lost Emily for good, I sure as hell wouldn’t allow it to be completely meaningless. “This is the right thing to do, and deep down,” I said. “I think you know it.

And Sutton…,” I said, staring at him hard,

“We ruined ourselves.”