CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
MILO
I took a seat in the dining room and grimaced as the smell of food wafted into my nostrils. I had been able to shower without Max’s help—though he did try to walk in on me a few times just to be sure I hadn’t passed out. I put my foot down when he tried helping me apply makeup because, he said, my eyeliner needed to be darker and my perfume wasn’t strong enough.
It had been three hours since I’d woken up, and I still wasn’t feeling better, especially if my reaction to the smell of food was any indication.
Gross.
“Eat,” Max said from behind me. “Eat so you don’t puke your little lady guts out later this afternoon.”
“I can’t believe I used to think you were hot,” I grumbled.
“Still hot.” Max took a seat. “Still your best friend.” He held up a croissant. “Now eat.”
I took a bite.
“Chew.”
I chewed twice.
“And swallow.”
With a gulp, I chased the croissant down with a cup of coffee and slowly took another bite.
“So, we’re going to kill Jayne.”
Coffee spewed out of my mouth onto the plate in front of me. “I’m sorry, what?”
“Nothing. I just love keeping you on your toes. Hey.” He touched my cross necklace. “This is nice . . . Think if we tie a bit of garlic around it and stuff it down her wedding dress she’ll melt?”
I had opened my mouth to respond when Max suddenly stood and held out his hand. “Reid, meet my best friend and lover.”
I rolled my eyes and held out my hand. “Milo.”
“Nice to meet you, Milo.” The guy’s grin screamed movie star as he held my hand in his, then kissed my knuckles.
“Never gets old.” Max sighed.
“Huh?” I shook the fog from my head. The guy was gorgeous.
“He’s like that Twilight vampire guy, the one with sparkles. I swear he says hello and women’s clothes, they fall right off. Amazing, really.”
“He’s lying.” Reid winked.
I heard a thud and turned around. “Grandma! Grandma, are you okay?”
“It’s his eyes,” Max said from behind me. “Magic powers.”
“Ma’am.” Reid rushed to Grandma’s side. “Are you okay?”
“Heaven.” Tears pooled in her eyes as she reached up and caressed his face. “I’ve died, haven’t I? I just . . . I never fathomed it would feel so real.” Her hands moved down his chest, and dipped into his pants. Holy crap! Someone needed to get Grams away from the young man before she took advantage of him in a bad-touch way.
“That’s enough,” Max grumbled, pulling a laughing Reid away. “Sit and behave before you give her a stroke.”
Shrugging, Reid took a seat next to me and Max. I helped Grandma to her feet and set her down toward the opposite end of the table so she couldn’t attack Max’s brother.
“Where is everyone?” I looked around at the empty seats. Weddings were always stressful; people rarely had time to eat, so my mom had decided to do a wedding brunch instead of just putting out snacks.
“Oh.” Max reached for his mimosa. “Jason should be right down and Colton had to go pick up Jenna.”
“J-Jenna.” Paper bag, I needed a paper bag. It couldn’t be the same Jenna. Could it? No. I was being silly. Ridiculous, really. I clenched the glass so hard my hand shook.
“One more squeeze and I think you may shatter it,” Max said, his voice laced with approval. “Come on, give it a go, I wanna see if you could actually do it.”
“Max.” I released the glass and placed my hands demurely in my lap. “This Jenna, is she an old friend?” Guys talked, right? So Max, being a guy, would know.
“Not sure.” Max reached for a Danish. “I think Colton said something about her living around here. Yoga instructor. Very flexible. Hell, I dated one of those once . . .” He sighed with a dreamy, faraway look. “Couldn’t move for days.” I thought he was going to stop talking but he didn’t take the hint when I pinched his thigh. “It was amazing the way her body was able to—”
“Max,” I snapped through clenched teeth. “Not now!”
“What?” He shrugged and leaned over to whisper, “It’s just a date because you made up a white lie about having a boyfriend. On second thought, to say what you did was lying would be like saying Grandma isn’t imagining what Reid looks like naked.” He shuddered and took a sip of water. “Your white lie grew into an elephant the size of Canis Majoris.”
Panic welled in my chest. What if he fell in love with her?
“That’s a star, by the way,” Max whispered.
“I know what Canis Majoris is,” I seethed.
“Well, you flunked astronomy, so—”
“Let’s not focus on that right now!” I tried to keep my voice even. Laughter bubbled out from the hall, and then Colton appeared.
With my worst nightmare.
Hah, spelled it right in my head!
Take that, Jenna “Ugly Face” Urtin!
Yes, her last name was Urtin.
How was I the girl who got passed over? At least my last name made sense!
Why couldn’t she be fat? And ugly? And tall. Not short. Guys liked short. No, I wanted her to be a candidate for the freaking WNBA. Instead, perfect height, perfect pretty brown hair, perfect braces-free smile. Damn her! I slammed my fist onto the table, gaining the attention of every person in the room.
“Milo!” Jenna exclaimed, her face erupting with joy.
“Jenna!” I said in an equally excited voice as I clenched the fork in my hand, ready to wield it as a weapon if need be. “So nice to see you!” I clenched the fork harder.
Max reached under the table and pried it from my death grip as Jenna walked around the chairs. Awkwardly I stood without my weapon, and pulled her in for a hug.
Oh, great. She smelled good too.
“You look amazing,” she gushed. “And, oh, my gosh, is this your fiancé?”
It was on the tip of my tongue to say it all. To blurt the lie out and just be finished with the whole masquerade.
And then I met Colton’s challenging glare.
So I put on my big boy pants and went ovaries to the wall. “Sure is! Max, meet my dear old friend Jenna.”
I was counting on Max being on my side.
Instead his eyes widened, his smile turned deadly, and he pulled her in for a long hug—the type that screams, I’d like to get to know you better. “Beautiful, great to meet you. Any friend of Milo’s is a friend of mine.”
“Yay,” I said weakly.
I was in hell.