* * *

I yelled out to the boys to get her pie shit outta the oven before following her into our room. She headed for the closet and pulled out a suitcase before throwing clothes on the bed willy-nilly. When she decides to move she fucking moves. “Mouth, when I said pack your bags it was a figure of speech. We’re not leaving right this very second.” Bloodthirsty fuck.

“What, why not?” Her face was like a storm cloud when she looked back at me before going back to her packing. It’s a wonder she’d survived this long without me there to protect her, knowing her penchant for just jumping into shit without thinking.

“I’m not taking you anywhere near that fuck until I have everything in place. Plus I have to clean up your latest mess before we go anywhere.”

“What’s to get in place? We go there, I take him out-we’re back home in time for coffee and cake.” This murdering little…

“Mouth, we do this my way or I go alone.” Damn, if looks could kill I’d be a goner.

“That’s my mark, mob boy don’t make me have to hurt you.” I ran my hand over my face because she was dead serious. “Just let me get some things together and we’ll go.”

“How long are these things of yours gonna take Don Franzese?” Who the fuck! Whatever. I can only deal with one of her issues at a time.

“You waited this long, what’s a few more days gonna hurt?” Did that sound cold? Damn, now I gotta walk on eggshells around her crazy ass.

“Hey, you’re the one harping on about retiring. See, this is why I work alone.” She flounced around the room mumbling some shit under her breath. Probably another one of her Italian insults.

“Tough. Calm your ass down and get over here.”

“No. Tell me how you found him. Has he been there all this time?” Hardheaded fuck.

“I don’t know if he went there right after…” I broke off what I was about to say, and looked at her eyes. She was still with me. I wasn’t about to mention her mother or what had happened to her for fear that my baby would go the fuck back in her head again. Forget eggshells, dealing with this shit was like walking a minefield.

“But uh, he’s been there for a few years at least. From what I’ve gathered so far he still does some work for the families, but he hasn’t been on your dad’s turf in years. They’ve kept him well insulated.” And with good reason, the guy is a one-man killing machine. I’m glad I’m the one who found him because I have a feeling he’s not going to be as easy as her other marks had been. This way I can run him to ground and let her have at him, but only after I’ve incapacitated him.

I kept my eyes on her ready to catch her if this shit fucked with her head. So far she seemed to be handling it okay. Then again with Mouth, who knows what the fuck okay is? She seemed deep in thought as she messed with the clothes on our bed. I held my breath and waited for her to say something. I was ready to go end the fuck myself and be done with it, but I’m afraid she’d gut me.

“What’s his cover?” That’s my girl; at least she’s asking all the right questions.

“He’s a farmer from out west, bought some land after losing his wife.” I gave her the bare bones of the story for now still not sure how far I should go so soon after her meltdown.

She seemed to be taking it all in stride, but I still watched her like a hawk waiting for her to break. There was a lump in my gut that I think was going to be there for a long fucking time. It will be a while before I get that shit out of my head. She on the other hand was acting like that shit never happened. Crazy fuck!

Instead she moved around the room like she was thinking really hard, which isn’t necessarily a good thing either. I just realized she makes me twitchy as fuck. Her energy is like this live thing that lives under my skin; like she was so deep in me I could feel her shit. With Mouth that means I’m constantly taking a ride on the crazy train.

“And you’re one hundred percent sure that it’s him? You checked the info with dad and uncle Al?” What the fuck? I need those two to do my job now? I just gave her a look, which she ignored.

“Where exactly is he?” She said that shit way too smooth and my antenna went up.

“Oh no you don’t. You give me your word right now that you won’t try going after this hump on your own.” She moved closer to the door.

“I gotta go check on something.”

“My ass, get back here.” I made a grab for her but she evaded me with a laugh. Music to my fucking ears! I nabbed her around her middle just as she opened the door to make a run for it.

I wouldn’t put it past her to try an end run around me and go to her dad and uncle. And I was just as sure those two old fucks would give her what she wanted. I’m trying to get her out and they’re finding ways to keep her in.

I hugged her to me until her laughter subsided, just enjoying being close, taking her scent into my lungs. Fuck knows she’d be back to her shit soon enough. Pain in the ass! She rubbed her head against my chest like a kitten. It always fucks with my head that someone so strong could become so soft in my arms. She let me hold her for a few minutes before she got antsy.

I was learning the signs little by little. I would need to in order to break down all her barriers. I didn’t fool myself for one damn second that it will be easy to tame her murdering ass. Planting my kid in her was the best move I’d ever made. At least I knew for the next few months I could keep her ass under control. Then again…

“Now you wanna tell me how you did the congressman?” She hummed under her breath as I pulled her back into the bedroom. I could hear the drone of the guys’ voices coming from the kitchen, no doubt comparing notes as to whose fault it was that she got out on their watch. I could almost feel sorry for them, but fuck that. They’re supposed to be the best, they should know better than to be outsmarted by this one. I closed the door and followed her back across the room.

“What are you talking about now, Tony Ducks?” She picked up something off the bed and folded it while ignoring the question. Yeah, because she’s so damn domestic! This fucking pain in the ass is gonna send me to an early grave. Sometimes I think her father and uncle are running game on me. They sent her ass in to make me stupid so they could move in for the kill. There’s no other explanation.

Getting out of the game my ass. It’s obvious what they were up to. Make me stupid or shoot myself in the fucking head dealing with her shit so they could take over my territory.

“Mouth, swear to fuck…”

“Would you give it a rest? Besides, you have no proof that that was my hit.” She sniffed and rolled her eyes at me.

“Yeah! Because there’s a lotta nuts running around the city with bow and arrows, offing motherfuckers. Where’d you hide that shit anyway?” Somehow I never see her little weapon of choice lying around.

“Why, what do you need with my toy?” Toy my ass. I would break the shit but it had some kinda sentimental value to her or some fuck and I didn’t trust her crazy ass not to have another meltdown.

“Arianna…”

“Look Frank Nitti, I have pies in the oven…”

I tackled her ass and took her down to the mattress. Of course I was careful not to hurt my kid when I pinned her under me. “If this is the only way I can keep your ass in line then prepare to be stuffed with dick twenty-four seven.”

I bit her lip when she opened that mouth of hers to throw some insult or the other at my damn head. The whole time this was going on, in the back of my mind was the memory of her crying out for her mother. I could still hear the fear in her voice and it made my gut cramp.

Will I always have that shit in my head? It was hard to know since she was like two different people. The girl who had all that shit in her head and didn’t even know it, and the murdering fuck running around offing our enemies in alleys while she had pies in the oven. Whichever one she is, she’s mine.

I felt her slight body beneath mine and was once again reminded of how delicate she was, such a tiny little thing to carry such a heavy weight on her shoulders. I’m terrified of anything happening to her, of not being able to protect her. How can I get into her head and fix what lives there? I can’t. I can’t erase the memory that she has to live with for the rest of her life and it’s fucking with me. I can hunt down this asshole and let her have his fucking head, but then what?

My heart clutched in my chest and my arms tightened around her protectively. I felt the love like a rush of heat centre in my heart and make its way to my dick. This love shit is scarier than anything I’ve ever faced. Not even my worse enemy had made me this fucking weak. The shit makes you feel like you can move mountains one minute, and put holes in your guts the next.

I looked down at her face. Did she know? Did she have any idea how much I felt for her? Better yet, can she really handle what I have in me for her? I’m not even sure I can. Maybe if I’d had time to prepare, but the shit just sneaked up on me and now with the kid I’m doubly fucked.

Please let me keep them safe. I gave my kid a passing thought but right now I had to take care of his mother. She’s so fucking young. I forget that sometimes with that mouth of hers. And she’s hurt. I’ve been so focused on her meltdown that I hadn’t really had time to process what this all meant. And with things moving so fast there wasn’t any time to deal with the shit. But once we return from Wisconsin I’m going to make sure she gets some kind of help.

Only I can’t imagine what the fuck that would be since she can’t very well go to a head shrinker and lay that shit out. I’ll just have to find a way to make her talk it out with me and put it behind her once and for all. If that doesn’t work, I’ll let her asshole relatives kidnap some fuck and hold him hostage while he works on her shit. I’m pretty sure they’d off his ass afterwards though, and to be honest, I don’t want some other man getting into my woman’s head no matter how many degrees he has on his wall.

Now looking down at her, her eyes clear and the barest hint of a devilish smile on her face, it was hard to believe that only a few hours ago she was broken. She hides that shit well I’ll give her that. If I hadn’t been there, hadn’t seen it with my own two eyes I would be hard pressed to believe that shit even took place. It’s like she’d locked it away or some fuck.

That’s what she does, she’s been doing it for fucking ever and those two assholes never had a clue. Whatever; it’s up to me now and I’m going to make sure she gets the care she needs. I kissed her forehead as the love threatened to choke me and sealed the promise I’d just made to myself.

“I love you, Mouth.” She’ll probably have my balls for being a sap. Instead her eyes got dreamy soft and she lifted her mouth for my kiss. Fucking chameleon. “I love you too mob boy, and you’re still not getting my toy.” I grinned down at her feeling happy. I’ve been feeling that shit a lot lately. When I wasn’t worrying about what the hell she was getting up to.

A year ago that shit would’ve been dangerous. Happiness can cause a man to let his guard down. A man in my position can’t afford that shit. But with her there was no help for it. She snuck in under my guard when I least expected it and took me over completely. I wonder if she knows it’s her greatest hit. She’d taken down one bad motherfucker if I do say so myself.

“Okay, you can keep your toy but behave yourself okay baby. I told you, I got this.” I knew from the way she buttoned her lips that she wasn’t gonna listen for shit. That’s her way of not making me any promises she didn’t intend to keep, because she doesn’t want to lie to me outright.

“But we’re still going to Chicago right.” There was anticipation mixed with fear in her voice. This guy was her boogieman. I’ma fuck his shit up before I hand him over to her.

“Yes, and then that’s it, you’re out.” She might not lie with her lips but that innocent look she gave me was pure deception.

My hope is that after we dispense of the man who killed her mother, this shit would be out of her system and we could settle down to wedded bliss. Which means I have to hurry up and take care of my shit or else this one would be leaving bodies all over the place like road kill. I have to remember to tell the others not to discuss shit in front of her in the future. Shit, that means I’ll have to talk to her dad and uncle. Something I’d promised myself never to do again in this life. Fuck!