Everything was packed, and he'd resupplied with Shadow Rock's generosity. Johnny looked around the small room he'd shared with Eden. Not a sign of them remained behind, only their scent.

It felt weird, staring at the empty room. Everything had changed between him and Eden in the space of a single night, and yet there was no visible evidence of it. Only a thickening feeling in his throat, a pressure behind his ribs.

Eden was getting to him.

Getting? Asked a sarcastic part of him he tended to think of as his inner asshole. It liked to throw truth bombs in his face.

Fine. Gotten. Johnny rubbed his chest. You are so fucked, Johnny-boy.

Because it was clear she didn't feel the same way.

What the hell had he been thinking? That they could ever have something between them? That there was any sort of future between them after they'd gotten their hands on this cure?

He was half tempted to ask Arik what was in that fucking kaga, because he'd forgotten for a second who he was.

How many times did he have to reach out, only to have the brutal truth thrown in his face?

Years of living on Cane's leash had taught him not to yearn for anything for himself, or else Cane would destroy it. The one time he'd given into his aching loneliness, he'd brought hell down upon Eden, and torn her life apart.

And then he'd finally managed to break Cane's hold on him for just long enough to put a bullet in the bastard's head.

In the months following Cane's death, he'd had this static sort of buzzing in his head, as he tried to put himself back together. For the first time in his life, there'd been no consequences for his actions. No reason not to make his own way, and do what he damned well wanted.

He'd searched for his mother, but by then it was too late. There was no sign of her, and nothing but ashes where their homestead had been. The Colton's kept to themselves, and nobody he spoke to in the nearby towns even knew who he was talking about.

He'd found a town. Bitter River. He'd walked in out of the darkness to find the residents celebrating a local marriage. People. Laughter. Dancing. A welcome he hadn't expected to find. He'd stayed one night. Turned it into two. Then a week. Started thinking maybe he could find a place to settle, when one of the local widows rested a hand on his shoulder one night and smiled at him as she offered him a drink.

And then he realized the truth when he woke from a drugged stupor to find himself in a cage. He didn't belong anywhere. Bitter River had sold him out to fucking slavers to keep them off their own backs.

He should know better than to want more from Eden.

All he'd end up doing was get his fingers burned again.

Or worse.

I don't know what you want from me, but if it's anything more than what happened here last night, then I don't think I can give it to you...

Yeah. Bullet to the chest right there. At least she was fucking upfront about it, but he didn't understand why he couldn't simply bury the faint nudge of hope inside him.

Brisk footsteps echoed along the stone floors outside. He'd recognize that determined stride anywhere, and his chest hitched as he girded himself. It had been an hour since he'd seen Eden and he'd managed to pull himself back together, but the second he heard her coming, the warg within started scraping its claws along the inside of his skin.

Johnny hauled his pack over his shoulders, settling it into position. Grabbing Eden's pack off the floor, he’d started toward the door when she burst through the flimsy curtain, her curls tangled in a ponytail and her face flushed with color.

"I can't let you do this," she blurted, pushing a hand against his chest.

He captured her hand against his chest, a little shocked she was touching him after what she'd said earlier. "Do what?"

"I've been speaking to Arik and Lincoln about the Confederacy." Eden looked up, her dark lashes framing the intense green of her eyes. "You can't come with me to Cortez City."

What the actual fuck?

"Like hell I can't." Fear flooded through him. "Jesus, Eden. You're not walking in there alone. You need someone to watch your back. Someone to make sure—"

"Arik and Lincoln are coming with me," she said bluntly. "Arik's been inside Cortez before, he can get me inside again. He said he knows a man who might be able to help me access what's left of the Radisson-Meyers Syndicate laboratories. That's where the cure is."

What?

He knew he'd pushed her earlier, but to do this....

"No," he said sharply. "I'm not going to allow you to walk into a place like that without protection."

"I'll have protection."

"Two strange wargs who may or may not be allies?"

"Not the first time I've trusted a stranger who may or may not be an ally." She tipped her chin up stubbornly.

Johnny's eyes narrowed, his voice coming out thick and heated. "I wasn't a stranger. Our lives have been intertwined for years. Why? Is this about last night?"

This morning?

"No. It's got nothing to do with last night." She looked away, two spots of color blooming in her cheeks. "It's not safe for a warg to enter the city."

That took him aback. Not safe? Was she actually worried about him? What did that mean?

Was there a chance she felt more for him than she claimed?

"Pretty sure you're planning on entering with two of them at your sides."

And I'm calling bullshit on this having nothing to do with what happened between us.

"Arik knows the city," she replied, her voice firming. "He knows what he's walking into."

"And I don't?"

She wrapped her arms around her middle. "You've helped me more than you could possibly know. You don't owe me anything anymore. Consider your debt repaid—"

"Like fuck," Johnny snapped. She wasn't just going to pat him on the shoulder and send him on his way like a good little boy. "You don't want me there because of what happened between us? Fine. I'll keep my hands to myself. I won't push you, angel. I know you've got a lot on your mind, and you're not ready to deal with us—"

"There is no us."

He breathed out. Slowly. She was under a lot of pressure. They hadn't even come close to broaching the elephant in the room. And this was the worst possible time to deny her statement. Still.... Maybe it was finally time to fight for the one damned thing he wanted in this world? "There's something between us, Eden, whether you admit it or not, but I understand this isn't the time. I'll shelve that discussion, but you need to know it's going to be revisited. One day."

She tipped her chin up stubbornly.

"As for me accompanying you? That isn't your decision to make."

"I—"

"You can't control everything, damn it. Stripping me of the ability to make this choice? That's bullshit." He stabbed a finger in the air toward her. "And you wouldn't like it if I did it to you. Pretty sure you'd be branding it under 'male territorial bullshit' or something. Give me one damned good reason to even consider this."

"I don't want to see you get hurt! If you're captured the Confederacy will put a shock collar on you, and lock you away in one of their facilities—they call them training facilities. That's where they mold their wargs into good little soldiers, and don't pretend you don't know exactly what I'm talking about. I heard everything you said that night to CJ. They'll hurt you, and it will be my fault. I should never have asked you to come."

It all gushed forth from her lips like blood from an arterial wound, and for a second he had no idea what to do. My fault.... They'd been skirting around the Bartholomew Cane issue for days as though it didn't exist, but he'd managed to glean enough from her to realize it affected her to this day.

She blamed herself for what happened to her brother.

She worried for the people she might not be able to save from the plague.

And now she was looking at him as though she didn't want to add him to the list of people she hadn't been able to save.

"Well, you didn't exactly ask me to come. I seem to recall blackmail and a shitty attempt at seduction," he joked, the words completely bypassing his brain and leaping from his mouth before he could catch them.

The second they hovered in the air, he had this sensation, like the ground dropped out from beneath his feet. Uh-oh.

Eden reared back, her eyes shocked and wide, and Johnny saw utter devastation flash through her eyes, as if he'd just confirmed every fear she had. He had no fucking idea what to do, how to help, how to....

Touch her, you idiot.

Johnny grabbed her by the shoulders, squeezing gently. "Eden." His voice roughened. "Breathe."

"I am breathing." She dug the heels of her palms into her eyes as if to hide from whatever she'd seen when he'd said it.

Tremors wracked her. Not massive, Eden-shattering tremors, but a shiver that shook through her from head to toe, as if her lungs were pulsing, trying to suck in air, but she was too afraid to let herself, just in case a sob escaped.

"I didn't mean it like that," he murmured, easing her into his arms. Every inch of her was tight and restrained, and she wrapped her arms around herself as if she didn't want to wrap them around him.

Because you're an utter dick....

"It just came out. I wasn't thinking." The creeping lassitude of his omega half began to assert itself, but for the first time in years it wasn't helping him.

Or her.

"You know what this life is like, angel. I could have died a hundred times in the past. I've come damned close to it at times. If something happens to me, it's because I put my own feet on this path. You're not responsible for me."

Not yet, anyway.

Maybe never.

But her fear softened the argument they'd had earlier because she wouldn't be so bloody upset if she didn't give a damn, would she?

That cursed nugget of hope stirred in his chest.

Johnny stroked her hair. It was the thing he adored most. And as he stroked, he felt her begin to soften in his arms, her face pressed firmly into his chest.

More than anything that had happened between them last night, this felt like they both took a dangerous step forward into... whatever the hell was building between them.

"Want to tell me what's bothering you? What flashed through your mind when I said that?"

"Is it so inconceivable I might actually not want to see you end up in a Confederacy prison?" A little bit of snap came back into her voice.

That's the spirit.

Eden McClain with her eyes blazing and her hands on her hips was a force to be reckoned with.

He didn't like it when the determination in her eyes was replaced with something sad.

"You're worried about me," he repeated, just to make sure he'd gotten the facts right. "You don't want me to come because you're worried the Confederacy will get their hands on me?"

"They break wargs. Arik's been there. He said they shock them, again and again. Use drugs to confuse them. Beat them down. Torture."

"Yeah," his voice thickened. "I know what they do. You want to know the truth? It scares the fuck out of me. Because I've been there. I've broken before. I know... I know what could happen." His gaze focused on her face, thumbs tracing the array of freckles that splayed lightly across her cheeks, as he gave her a little piece of the Cane puzzle. "You know what scares me more? The idea of you walking into that trap without me. Of not being able to protect you. Not knowing what's happening to you. Maybe never seeing you again.... I can't do that."

Eden looked up, misery written across her face. "I spent nearly ten years wearing guilt over Adam on my shoulders. I don't want.... If anything happened to you, and it was my fault.... You're right. I blackmailed you into coming."

"Trust me, darlin'." He stroked his fingers down the back of her neck. "You couldn't have forced me if you'd tried. I came because I couldn't stay away—"

"Because I insisted."

"Because I couldn't let you cross the Great Divide by yourself, no matter how much I tried to talk myself into it. You're not the only one who knows what guilt feels like. I owed it to you to try and make amends." He felt a shiver run through her as he turned his hand, so his thumb rasped against the soft skin just behind her ear. "I'm a fully grown adult, Eden. I made a choice to escort you and whatever happens, that's on me. Stop trying to take on the weight of the world. I get it. I know why you're doing it. I—"

"You don't get it. Adam had a silver bullet in his pocket. He kept it with him all the time, just in case...."

Johnny's fingertips stilled on her skin, hearing the distress in her voice. "Did he use it?"

"What?" She looked up. "No."

"Maybe your brother wasn't carrying it 'just in case.' Maybe it was something he could put his hand around, as a reminder, when times were grim and the warg was threatening to push its way out of his skin. Maybe it helped him breathe a little easier, knowing it was there. And Bart Cane turned Adam into a warg before he even sent me to fetch you that night. All he wanted from you was leverage to force Adam to lure Luc Wade into the same trap. You never had anything to do with what happened to your brother, Eden. It was a done deal by that stage. Say it."

"I...."

"Never had anything to do with Adam being forcibly turned into a warg."

"I never... had anything to do with Adam being turned," she mumbled.

It would have to do.

"And if something bad happens to me, it's not your fault."

She looked up mutinously.

Johnny pressed a finger to her lips. "It won't be your fault. Say it."

"It won't be my fault—"

He kissed her, stealing the words from her lips. No tongue this time, just a gentle exploration. Eden's hand softened on his chest, her lips tilting to his, and a soft moan coming from her—

"No." Eden broke away, resting her forehead against his chest.

"Sorry. I just broke one of your rules, but you broke one first. You touched me."

"You are not distracting me like this."

He couldn't help smiling, just a little. Oh, angel. This morning he'd wondered if there'd been anything more between them than sex on her behalf. Her confession seemed to unknot some of the tension within him.

It's not just me.

"I don't need to distract you. The decision's made. I'm coming with you."

Eden breathed out a shaky laugh. "Three alpha wargs in a high-pressure situation? I just know this is going to go well."

"Depends on who's in charge."

"Me," she said, drawing away from him. "I'm in charge. And if anyone argues they can go home."

"Got it."

"And the rules stay the same," she blurted. "No kissing. No... Nothing else."

He stared at her for a long time. She'd kissed him back. He could afford to give her a little bit of space. "Your rules. Which mean, if you ever want to break them, I'm down for that. Your choice."

Eden swallowed. "Okay."

She turned to leave, but he grabbed her waist before she could take a step.

"All I want in return is to know one thing.... When you agreed to have hate sex with me, was that really how you felt?"

Eden bit her lip. Hesitated. Finally gave in. "I don't hate you."

"Not even a little bit?" He leaned closer.

She shook her head. Whispered, "Not at all. I was angry with you. Or not at you. Just angry. I don't know. And you've been pushing my buttons for days. I don't know what's going on in my head. With you."

Yeah, I get it.

Seemed to be the sum total of his feelings at the moment too.

"Good." He tilted her chin up. "It was angry, messy, exploding volcanoes of emotion sex, but it wasn't hate sex. And your buttons need to be pushed every now and then."

Eden gripped both of his wrists, her eyes lifting to his. "That's why you were shitty this morning, isn't it?"

"I wasn't shitty."

She arched a brow.

His breath exploded out of him. "Fine. I was a little pissed. Best night of my life, and you practically slapped me on the ass and said, thanks for the good times, but no thanks."

"Did you want me to say something else?" she asked slowly and lifted her gaze to his.

Johnny stopped breathing. It was one thing to be pissed with the way she'd used his body to scratch an itch, another to actually be the one to put his heart on the line.

But he was tired of playing the lone wolf.

"Yes," he said simply.

Her mouth parted, her eyes widening.

"Later, Eden," he murmured. "You and I have a lot to discuss, but I think we need to get our heads in the game. We're going to cross into confederacy territory today and go get your plague cure. You and I. Whatever it takes, Eden."

Eden looked like she was trying to read between the lines, but she finally nodded. "Whatever it takes."