The Naughty One: A Doctor’s Christmas Romance (Season of Desire Book 2) by Michelle Love (16)

She looked at me for a second before a smile moved over her lips. “Troy!”

Her heart monitor sped up and I put my finger to my lips. “Stay calm, baby. I snuck in here to see you.”

“I’ve been asking for you since I first woke up. They told me only family could come in. I can’t believe you did this. Weren’t you afraid you’d get caught?” She tried to pick up her hand, but was too weak to do it. “I can barely move. They said I’ll have to start therapy in a few days.”

“I’ve missed you,” I said as I ran my hand over her cheek. “I love you, Blyss. Can you ever forgive me?”

She looked at me with blank eyes. “For what?”

“You do know what happened to you, right?”

“Was I in an auto accident? The doctors won’t tell me any more than that I was brought here in bad shape. They had to do surgery to fix me up, and they’ll tell me more when I’m ready to hear it.” Her eyes roamed over my face. “How was it you weren’t hurt too? I had to have been riding with you.”

“You weren’t in an accident. But I don’t want to get into that right now. If the doctors think it’s better to wait, then I’m not about to go against their suggestion.” A sigh escaped as I looked at her. “You have no idea how good it is to see you awake.”

“How long have I been asleep?” she asked as she looked passed me. One of the nurses came in and was looking at all her lines and wires. “Hello, I’m Blyss Danner.”

The male nurse smiled at her. “I know. I’ve been taking care of you for a little over a week. It’s good to see you awake. How do you feel on a scale of one to ten?”

“Um, some things hurt on me. My stomach feels sore, my back is aching, and my throat is sore and dry. Anything we can do about all that?” For a woman in that much pain, she was in good spirits. I was more than a bit surprised.

“I’ll give you a dose of morphine.” The nurse left to get the drug, and I suddenly recalled the fact the Blyss had been addicted to a lot of things when she was born.

“Try not to take too many painkillers, baby. You do remember your problem when you were a baby, right?” I ran my hand over her arm and couldn’t help but notice the red whelps that were still on the back of it. My heart stuttered as I tried to hold back my anger at the man who did that to her.

“Do you think I should tell him not to give me anything? It didn’t occur to me that they don’t know my history. I’m glad you snuck in here. I really could use you here, Troy. I’m so weak, and I’m bored to pieces. Could you bring me some books or something?”

“I’ll bring you an e-reader in the morning, and you can order all the books you want. I’ll set up an account on it. Maybe if you tell your doctors you need me, they’ll decide to allow me in. But it won’t be for long periods of time. Five minutes in the morning and five in the evening.”

“That’s it?” She looked sad, and I hated to see that look on her face.

“It’s okay. It won’t last long. And when you get out of here, I’m taking you home to Napa Valley. My family is dying to meet you and my mother has told me she will be taking care of you until you’re healthy again.”

“How does your family know about me?”

“There’s a ton to tell you, baby.”

The nurse came back with the morphine, and I decided to use my fake position to get some information. “I came across this young lady’s file earlier today. That’s why I’m here tonight. I heard she was taken off the meds and would be waking up. You guys are aware of her history, right?”

“We have no prior history. What do you have that we don’t?”

“Um, just a thing her boyfriend gave us. Miss Danner here was born addicted to a lot of different drugs and alcohol. I think staying away from all opioids would be the best thing for her. Don’t you?” I looked at Blyss. “You should most likely tell this nurse about your problems when you were born. That way you won’t end up with bigger problems than you already have.”

“I should tell you my little tale, I guess. Then you can decide what pain medication is best for me.” Blyss closed her eyes and looked as if she was worn out.

“I’ll go get a pad of paper. Be right back.” The nurse left us alone, and I felt I had a small window of time to ask her to marry me.

“Blyss, are you tired, baby?”

“Very. My head hurts. I could really use that pain medicine. It feels as if I have cuts all over the back of my body.” She looked at me with wide eyes. “Troy, I remember now. I was going to one of those rooms. You were going to punish me.” Her jaw hung open. “Troy, did you do this to me?”

“God no!” I shouted just as the nurse walked back in.

“Is everything okay in here?” he said as he looked at me.

Blyss looked right at the man. “Everything is fine. I want to be left alone. Can you make him leave, please?”

“Blyss, I didn’t do …”

The nurse looked at me, then pointed at the door. “Don’t make me call the cops.”

I stumbled backward as Blyss closed her eyes. “I have to remember it all. Until then, I don’t want you anywhere near me, Troy.”

“I can tell you …”

“Get out,” the nurse said. “I have no idea how I missed recognizing you, but I have now. Out or I’ll kick your ass myself.”

“Tell her the truth. You know the truth. Tell her it wasn’t me. Please!”

The other two nurses showed up, and I knew I was about to go to jail if I didn’t leave. My heart was aching that she’d think I’d hurt her that way. As I left, I could hear her saying, “He warned me there was a beast inside him. I should’ve listened.”

Blyss

It made perfect sense after Troy nearly ran away. He’d turned into that savage he’d said he could become and he’d hurt me. Hurt me so badly, I’d been in a coma for over a week! My heart rate was up, and the nurses heard it on the machine. “It’s okay. Calm down, sweetie,” one of the female nurses said as she patted me on the shoulder.

“He hurt me. He promised he’d never hurt me and he did this to me!” I was in shock that Troy would actually do such a horrible thing. Then it occurred to me that he shouldn’t be walking the streets. “How come he isn’t in jail?”

“I’m telling her,” the other male nurse said as he crossed his arms.

“The doctors said not to,” the other male nurse cautioned him.

“Well, I don’t care. It’s a crime to let her think the man who loves her would do such a terrible thing.” He put his hands on his hips and looked at me. “Another man did this to you. And he is in jail. I don’t know the entire truth, as the media has told so many versions of the story it’s hard to tell which story is true. All I know is that your man did not do this to you. He had no part in it at all. You were locked away from him for a little while, is what was said. Another man got to you, and he’s the animal who did this to you.”

He was telling me things that had bursts of memory shooting through my aching brain. “He was wearing a mask! It wasn’t Troy! It was another man who said he’d bid on me. I guess he was jealous of Troy. He said things like Troy had ruined me and that he was weak or something like that.” I was happy I finally remembered it all. “Oh, God! Can you get Troy back here for me? Please, I don’t want him thinking I think he hurt me. Please.”

All three of the nurses shook their heads, then the lady said, “We don’t have his cell number. In the morning, we can get it from admission. He’s been taking care of the hospital bills, so they should have it.”

“I hate this,” I said as I closed my eyes. “He’s been the one who tried to stop me from doing all this BDSM stuff.”

“Hold on,” one of the men said. “The guy who won you, your Dom, tried to stop you from doing what?”

“All of it. I had to beg him to do the things to me that I had signed up for. He kept telling me I was fragile because I had a problematic childhood. I don’t know how I could have ever accuse him of doing such a thing. And about that. What the hell all happened to me? I feel like a truck ran over me.”

“We’ve already told her too much. Do you see what’s happening to her heart rate?” the lady said.

I felt odd, my head was pounding, and I wanted only one thing. To let Troy know I didn’t think anything bad about him. “I need him, you guys. I need him more than I need anything else. Please help me talk the doctors into letting him stay with me. I’ll get better much faster. It’s a fact that I will. Please.” I was begging and pleading for a thing that I shouldn’t have had to.

When did being in the hospital have a person losing their right to be with the person they loved?

Something was coming over me. My body felt warm, then I felt tired. “A bit of morphine shouldn’t do anything to her. She needs it anyway,” I heard one of the men say.

“Her blood pressure was rising anyway. We can’t let her get that upset anymore,” the other man said.

I knew I had to calm down and get better. But as the darkness was taking me over, I saw it all in my head. The man who took advantage of me while I was tied up. The hardness at my back. Had he?

“Was I …” I could barely speak; the medicine was pulling me under. “Raped. Was … I …”

A hand ran over my forehead. “No, you weren’t raped, Blyss. Go to sleep. It’s time to rest now.”

My mind was settled. Troy was still the only man to have touched me that way. I was still pure for him. I don’t know why that mattered so much to me, but it did. Troy and I could have that storybook life he talked about. He would always be the only man I’d ever given everything to. We could have a pristine life filled with more and more firsts.

It was then I had my first thought about having his baby. I wanted us to have our first child together. He and I would give his parents their first grandchild. Troy and I would have a baby. I hoped he’d say we could. I began to hum a lullaby as I drifted off to sleep. I could be a mom. With him to help me, I could learn to be a mother, a thing mine must’ve never learned how to be.

Everything would be fine. He wanted to marry me. He’d said so. He and I would get married, have babies, and live happily ever after. My life could be far different from what it started out being. I wasn’t going to be alone anymore. I had Troy and we’d have a family.

The sound of a siren had me stirring, then it faded away. I could hear the voices though. My nurses’ voices sounded sad as they talked in hushed tones. I could hardly make out anything they said. Until the name ‘Troy Masterson’ was said, and then I heard another word, ‘critical.’

What the hell had happened?

* * *

Troy

My head was fuzzy as I left the hospital. As hard as I was trying to think about what I could do about Blyss, I couldn’t come up with anything. I had to hope the nurses would decide to tell her the truth, even if the doctors had said not to tell her a thing about why she was in the ICU ward of the hospital.

As I got to my Jeep, I was about to get in the car when I heard the sound of metal crunching, tires squealing, and people screaming. It was coming from down the street that ran in front of the hospital. I just started running toward the commotion. What I found were three cars piled up, and one wrapped around a light pole. Several people stood outside of the cars, but it was obvious that people were trapped in the car that had turned into a horseshoe.

Making my way to the more distressed car, I found a little girl in the back seat. A man was driving and his head was resting on the steering wheel. A woman was in the passenger seat, and she was laid back, a line of blood was running from her forehead, and her eyes were closed.

The little, dark-haired girl opened her eyes and they locked with mine. “You’re okay. I’m going to get you out.”

Even though she looked thoroughly confused, she nodded, which was a good sign she didn’t have any head trauma. Turning back to find something to break out the window with, I didn’t see anything, then my hand moved to my belt buckle.

I looked back at the little girl. “Take off your seatbelt and move as far away as you can from the window. Turn your head and cover your face. I’m going to break the window and get you out of there, okay, pumpkin?”

She nodded again and did as I’d told her to do. I gave another glance to the people in the front seat and found they were still knocked out. I tossed the blanket I had on the ground. Pulling my belt off, I wrapped it around my hand so the brass buckle was covering my knuckles and the leather protected the rest of my hand.

One punch did nothing but jar my entire body. The next made small cracks that radiated from the center. One more, and I had the window smashed. I pulled the safety glass out easily after that, and in no time, I had the kid in my arms.

Her body was shaking as she clung to me and put her head on my shoulder. “Are my mommy and daddy going to be okay, mister?”

The sounds of sirens moved in and around us as the first ambulance arrived. I ran my hand over the child’s little head. “I’m sure they’ll be just fine. The doctors take really good care of the people who go to the hospital, and I’ll stay with you until they wake up, okay?”

“Promise?”

“I promise you I will keep you right with me until one of your family members comes for you. What’s your name, precious?”

She pulled her head up to look at me. Her dark green eyes drooped with sadness. “Veronica. My name’s Veronica Snyder and I’m seven.”

“My name is Troy Masterson. Nice to meet you, Veronica.” I leaned down to pick up the soft, pink blanket I’d originally bought for Blyss. The little girl needed it a lot more than she did. Wrapping it around her, I gently pushed her to lie her head back on my shoulder. “You rest. I’ve got you, pumpkin.”

The paramedics who showed up first just happened to be the same guys who picked up Blyss that night at the club. We instantly recognized each other as they came to the car. “Hey, Masterson, who do you have there?”

“I have Veronica Snyder. Her parents are in the car.” I patted her back and felt her nuzzling my neck. “I’ll be taking care of her until we figure out how they are.”

He nodded, and I stepped back to get out of their way as a fire truck came up to help get the others out of the bent car. It took no time to get everyone out, and then they were heading to the hospital. I took the girl and got into the ambulance that took her mother back to where I’d just left.

While one of the men looked after her mother, the other took over, giving Veronica an exam, checking her vitals, and giving me a thumbs up. “She’s good to go.”

The paramedics hooked her mom up to an IV, and in just a few minutes, her eyes opened. Relief washed over her as she found her daughter safe in my arms. “Veronica, are you okay?”

The little girl lifted her head and looked at her mother. “Yes, mommy.” Then she began to cry. “Mommy, you’re bleeding!”

Her mother reached out and touched her daughter’s outstretched hand. “Mommy will be fine. Who has you, honey?”

“Hi, my name’s Troy Masterson. My fiancé is in the ICU ward at the hospital we’re heading to. I’ll be more than happy to keep your daughter safe with me in the waiting room at the emergency room while you’re seen, Mrs. Snyder.”

She blinked a few times, looking confused. “How do you know my name?”

“Your daughter told me.”

A weak smile curved her pale lips. “Oh. Thank you, Mr. Masterson. I’d be thankful for your help with her while things get taken care of. I don’t feel that badly. My head hurts a little, but I think I’ll be fine.”

Veronica smiled and wiped her eyes. “Good, Mommy.”

The woman’s body began to tremble and her eyes went wide. Then she began to convulse. The little girl screamed, and I pulled her head back to my shoulder so she didn’t have to see what was happening to her mother.

“She’s going into shock,” one of the paramedics said as we pulled up to a stop at the emergency room.

“Shh. It’s going to be okay, Veronica. They’ll help her. We’re at the hospital now.” Her mother was taken out of the ambulance as the poor girl cried hysterically. I got out of the ambulance and followed them inside.

“Mommy!” The paramedic gave me a look that said screaming children inside the emergency area that was about to be overrun with the accident victims was a terrible idea. I nodded in silent understanding and took her around to the outside waiting area. I had to calm her down before we went inside. Taking a seat on the bench, I rocked her and shushed her until she was quiet. She’d fallen asleep, and I couldn’t have been happier.

Going inside, I went to the nurse at the check-in area, told her who I was, and said that I had the Snyder’s daughter. I told her I’d be waiting right there with her and to please keep me updated on their status. She assured me she would, and I took a seat at the far end of the waiting area as I knew it was about to get packed in there.

Holding that little girl had me feeling the oddest thing in the world. Normal! She felt at home in my arms. It had me thinking about Blyss and how I’d love nothing more than to start a family as soon as she was able to. I knew she would have healing to do before that happened, but I couldn’t wait to see if she would be up for it.

As I was lost in thought and Veronica was lost in dreamland, asleep on my shoulder, I leaned my chin against her little head. One of the nurses came to me. “Mr. Snyder is in surgery for two broken legs. One of them is very bad and amputation is being considered. Mrs. Snyder has bleeding on the brain. She’ll be taken into surgery as soon as the neurosurgeon arrives, which should be very soon. She’s already prepped. I’m afraid neither of them has been conscious enough to tell us if there is anyone to take care of their daughter. I can have social services pick her up.”

“No way in hell,” I whispered as sternly as I could. “I talked to her mother. She knows I have her daughter. You can ask the paramedics that brought her in if you have to. They overheard us talking. I’ll stay here at the hospital as long as I need to. Don’t worry about me and don’t call social services to come get this little girl, or they’ll have a fight on their hands. Got me?”

“I got you, Mr. Masterson.” She turned to walk away, then turned back around. “You know, a lot of nasty things have been said about you since Blyss Danner was brought in last week. You have a supporter in me now. No one better say a bad word about you when I’m around. You let me know if you need anything. I’ve got your back.”

“Good to know.” I nodded at her. “And thank you. There’s a lot to the story that no one’s been told. I love Blyss more than anything. I’d never hurt her. No matter what anyone thinks.”

She left me with a smile as she went back to dealing with the throngs of people who were converging on the emergency room that night. And she left me feeling a bit better about things. One by one, I could get people to see me as the man I was, not the one the media had made me out to be.

That room began to fill up to more than capacity, and I went to tell the nurse where I’d be taking Veronica. “Hey, since her parents are up in surgery, I’m going to a waiting room up there. I’ll check in with the nurses’ station up there, okay?”

She was so busy all she could do was nod, and I took off. I had to pass the ICU ward as I made my way to the bank of elevators that would take me upstairs. Hesitating for a moment, I found one of the nurses walking out. She stopped and looked at me. “You’ve acquired a little girl, Mr. Masterson. And word has spread like wildfire through this hospital about you.”

“All good, I hope.”

“All good. Great, as a matter of fact. Blyss is asleep right now. Morphine was administered, so she won’t be woken up. But I want to let you know we told her the truth and she also recalled the actual events that brought her to us. When she wakes up, I’ll tell her I let you know that. She was upset when she realized you didn’t hurt her.”

I was more than relieved. “Do you have any idea who I can talk to about seeing her on the up and up?”

“In the morning, about nine, the chaplain might be able to bring you in with him. He’s done that on occasion. Stop by the chapel to talk to him before nine.”

Finally, I’d caught a break. Seems my good deed was giving me some great karma. “I’ll do that. Thank you. Thank you so much!”

With a new light on the situation, I took the little girl up to a much quieter waiting room and relaxed. I’d get to see Blyss in the light of day, I prayed.

Blyss

When my eyes opened, I found Troy sitting next to a man in a pale blue suit. There was a little dark-haired girl on Troy’s lap and she was playing with his cell phone. He sat her on the chair and came to me. “Hey, pretty lady.” He brushed my hair back and kissed my cheek. “I love you.”

He took my hand and I gave a squeeze. “I love you too. I’m sorry …” His lips touched mine, stopping me from saying anything else.

“Don’t be sorry. It’s all understandable. I’m just glad you know now that I wasn’t the one who hurt you. And the man who did that is in jail. He’ll never see the outside world again; I promise you that.”

“When I was falling asleep, I overheard something about you and something about being critical. What was that all about?”

“There was an auto accident just down the street from here as I was about to leave. I helped out with it, and some of the people who were brought in were in bad shape. That’s what that was all about.”

“That makes sense. And who do you have with you?” I looked around him at the other two people and found the little girl smiling at me.

“Hi, I’m Veronica. Mr. Troy is watching me while my mommy and daddy get better.” She gave me a wave.

All I could manage was a nod. “Nice to meet you, Veronica. I’m Blyss.”

“Oh, I know that. Mr. Troy told me all about you and how he loves you so much.”

Heat filled my cheeks as I blushed. “He did?”

“Um, hmm.” She went back to playing with his cell as the other man got up and came to the other side of the bed. “He broke the window of my dad’s car and rescued me. He’s taking care of me while Mom and Dad get better.”

“I’m Reverend Sloan. I’ve come to visit you every day since you were brought here. I can see you’re doing much better than you were, and I heard you’ll be starting therapy to get those body parts moving again. A week in bed can take a month to get over.”

“That long?” I was feeling more than depressed about the amount of time he was talking about.

“Oh, you’ll be moving on your own in a couple of days,” he added. “But you’ll feel the weakness in your body for about a month.”

“Oh, that’s better.” I looked at Troy, who couldn’t stop smiling at me. “Why do you look like the cat who ate the canary?”

“I’m just so happy to be here with you. That’s all.” He kissed my forehead. “I feel like it’s been forever since I’ve seen you. Last night wasn’t enough.” He looked at the reverend. “Being that you’ve been around this hospital a lot, do you know when they’ll move her to a room where I can see her all the time?”

“After she can move on her own.”

I heard several men talking in the hallway, then they came into my room. Suddenly, it was filled up, and the three doctors who came in looked at Troy and the other two people. One of them said, “Mr. Masterson, you can go in to see the Snyder’s now. We’ve put them together. Mrs. Masterson told us she has her mother coming to take care of their daughter. You’ll be relieved of babysitting duty.”

Troy looked anything but happy about that. “Aw, I loved spending time with her.” He went to pick the girl up, and she handed him his phone, wrapped her arms around his neck, then gave him a kiss on the cheek, which I found absolutely adorable.

“I love spending time with you too, Mr. Troy. But can you take me to see my parents now?”

He nodded, then gave me a smile. “I’ll be back as soon as they let me, baby.”

With a quick glance at the doctors, I asked, “Can you please allow him to be here more? It would decrease my recovery time; I can promise you that.”

“We’ll talk about it, Miss Danner. For now, the rules stay in place. He can come in with the chaplain, but that’s it for now.”

“One more kiss, then, please.”

Troy came to me, leaning over and kissing my cheek. He whispered, “Talk them into it. I’ll be around the hospital anyway. I’ll check back around lunch to see what they’ve decided.”

My heart lurched as he walked away, and my heart monitor caught the action. The way it sped up had my doctors looking at each other, noticing the effect he had on me. Troy did too and smiled at them before he walked all the way out. “She loves me, guys. Think real hard about allowing me to spend more time with her. It could be critical to her recovery, after all.”

Pursing my lips, I sent him an air kiss before he turned to leave me. With a sigh, I started in on the doctors, “I want him here with me.”

“You have to understand,” one of them said. “This hospital has rules.”

“Move me, then. Get me out of ICU.” I was determined to find a way for him to be with me. “You have no idea how much I miss him already.”

“Maybe you have an unhealthy attachment to the man,” one of the doctors told me.

It pissed me off. “Look, I know none of you know a thing about me. I’ve never had a family. No one has ever loved me until Troy.”

One of them laid a hand on my shoulder. “Miss Danner, you met that man when you signed yourself up to be sold for the summer months. We are requiring you to see a psychiatrist before you’re released from the ICU. Your confession to never being loved just goes to prove how much you need intervention.”

“Intervention?” I was reeling from the way the men thought they could take me over. “I will gladly talk to anyone you want me to. But I want Troy too.”

“It would be best for you two to have a bit of distance for a while.” the doctor, who was pulling my hospital gown away from one side of me, said.

“I don’t want any distance between us. Ow!” He’d pulled the back of the gown and it pulled at my skin. “That hurts!”

He looked at the man who had the clipboard. “Tell the nurses to change the bandages this morning. Some have slipped off.”

“By the way, I remembered what happened to me. I thought you might want to know that.” I was rolled to one side as they examined my wounds.

“Okay, so you know about that. How do you feel about it?” one of them asked.

“How anyone would feel, I guess. Violated and hurt. But I’ll recover. It was me who put myself in that situation after all. I have no one to blame but myself for what happened to me.”

One of the men made a huffing sound, then said, “Your Dom was in charge. I know how this stuff works, and you’re taking the blame for no reason. I don’t care what you think. He was in charge.”

“I can be a force to be reckoned with,” I retaliated as I felt tugging at my back. “Ow! What are you guys doing back there?”

“Pulling off the bandages so they can be treated again and new ones can be put on,” one of them answered me. “Toby, put down for her to be given a sponge bath before re-bandaging. I don’t like the redness of some of those wounds. And up the antibiotics.”

Another one of them added, “Schedule a CAT scan of her liver.”

“Am I in that bad of shape, guys?” I whined.

“You’re getting better. But you’re in pretty bad shape, yes.” I was rolled over and saw the doctor who’d spoken looking at me with a concerned expression. “When you’re released, where do you plan on going?”

“To Napa Valley with Troy. He and his mother are going to take care of me until I’m better.”

The three of them gave each other looks I didn’t like, then one of them said, “You don’t have anywhere else to go?”

“No, I don’t. I let my apartment go before I left Stanford. I gave my crappy car away. I’m supposed to get whatever sum of money Troy bid for me at the end of the contract between us, which is at the end of summer. But even with that, I’d have to set up a place to live and things like that. Believe me, no matter what you think about Troy, I am much better off with him.”

“Damn,” the clipboard carrying doctor cursed. “You really got yourself into a bind, didn’t you?”

“I suppose I did. I had no idea I’d be getting myself so injured that I’d need help. But it happened and I’ll deal with it.” I was getting tired and the pain of them removing my bandages was getting to me. “Can I have something for the pain you guys are giving me?”

“Can you give us an idea of what your pain level is, from one to ten?”

“Seven. A solid seven. I think some Ibuprofen will suffice.”

“We’ll make that decision,” one of them said. I heard him whispering to the others.

Another one said, “Put her down for some oral Ibuprofen.”

I sighed as I realized just how much control they had over me. I was at their mercy, it seemed. So when they rolled me back over, done with the examination, I let them have it. “Okay, I’m not one to be victimized. The man who did this will not affect me for long. Worse things have happened to me in my life. Things I had no part in. I had a part in what happened to me. Believe or don’t believe it, I don’t care. I want Troy. I know he’s paying the hospital bill. I’m sure if you want me to be watched over full time, he can pay for that extra care to be done in a private room. I want him, end of discussion, or I’ll seek to be moved and complain about no one listening to me.”

With sad nods, they all left me. I suppose they thought me a lost cause, but they didn’t know Troy and they didn’t know me. I wasn’t about to make any rash decisions about the man. I just wanted him around. I trusted him more than I had ever trusted anyone. And I knew I had to take responsibility for what had happened to me.

I could blame Troy. It seemed everyone else was. But what good would that do? The truth was, I’d begged for what I got. He was my Dom, and he felt he needed to give me what I’d asked for so repeatedly. How could I ever blame him for what another man did to me?

The answer was, I couldn’t. It was my fault and I’d accepted that. It also meant I needed to take my time with Troy. Not jump into things. I was too quick to go with my impulses and that had left me in a bad situation—one where I had to depend on others just to survive. I wasn’t about to keep making rash decisions.

I hoped like hell Troy would understand that and not force anything on me, like making a commitment to living with him. I wasn’t ready for that. Anyone could see that.

Troy

After reuniting Veronica with her parents and her grandmother, I felt good about leaving her happy and smiling. But when I walked out of their hospital room, I was in for some pretty rude remarks from one of Blyss’ doctors. “Come with me, Masterson.” It was Doctor Toby. That’s all I knew him by, as I’d heard the other doctors call him that. “You and I need to talk, man to man.”

“Or should you say, Dom to Dom?” I asked him as I stepped up to walk beside, rather than behind, him. He exhibited many alpha traits and his authoritative manner was a dead giveaway.

“Just come on,” he muttered as we went to a private area. He closed the door behind us and it seemed we were in a dressing room. Different colored scrubs lined the shelves, giving me the impression people went in there to change.

“I’m sure I know what this is about. You think I’m a terrible Dom for Blyss.”

He spun around and caught me by the collar of my shirt. “You’re the worst mother fucking Dom I’ve ever met. Now you shut the fuck up and listen to me. That young woman is a physical mess because of your lack of proper care.”

My tone was even. “Let me go before I fuck your world up, Toby.”

He held on for only a moment before the fire in my eyes told him to do as I’d said. “I don’t want this to get out of hand. I just want you to fucking disappear. I’ve never seen a Sub who had been done so wrong. And she was completely innocent, Masterson. When you got her, she was as innocent as they come. You had an obligation to take care of her, and you failed her so miserably that she’ll wear the marks of your mistake for the rest of her life. Leave her here and go away. I’ll make sure she gets put into a rehabilitation facility.”

Narrowing my eyes at the man who thought he knew better than I did about what Blyss needed, I proceeded to set him straight. “I’m not leaving her. I’m taking full responsibility for what happened to her. But you need to understand that BDSM is behind us both. I’m going to marry that woman and nothing bad will ever happen to her again. Hell, I didn’t want to take her to the club at all. She wanted it.”

“Since when do Subs tell their Doms what to do?” He walked away from me and threw his hands up in the air. “She runs you, Masterson. Everyone saw it that night at the show.”

“I agree. She did run me. But things are going to be different from here on out. Like I said, and like you ignored, BDSM is behind us.”

“How do you think that’s going to help her? I mean, yes, she doesn’t have the attitude to be a Sub, but how is being with you going to help her? She needs help. The poor thing is all alone in this world.”

“She’s not alone. She has me. And we’ll make our own family. I love her. I know it’s hard for you to understand, but it’s not your call. If she doesn’t want me, then that’s between her and I. You doctors can mind your business. I didn’t hurt her. Not intentionally. And you better believe I’ve learned from letting her guilt me.”

He glared at me. “And how the hell did she guilt you into sending her into a private room all alone, might I ask?”

“Not that it’s any of your business, but since you’re all up in mine, she begged me to punish her.”

“Okay, but why send her alone?”

“I wanted to give her some time being restricted to see if she’d cool off. I had no intention of going through with the punishment I’d told her I was going to administer. I was about to talk to Grant and the other owners about my plan, but that maniac got to her first. Had I known anyone was watching her like that, I’d never have left her alone. I would’ve had the trainer stay with her until I got there.”

It was amazing to me how fuming mad the man was as his face turned red. “If you stay, she’ll just become more attached to you. You’re like an addiction to her. We all can see it. Why can’t you? You don’t rule her. She rules you the same way a person does any drug they’re addicted to. They keep that drug around so they can have it when they want it. That’s what you are to her.”

“I am not. And you don’t know shit about her. I want to see her. I want to be with her. She needs me more now than ever.”

“She has highly trained and qualified nurses and doctors to care for her. Tell me, what you can add to that?” He looked down his nose at me, pissing me off.

“She doesn’t love you people. She loves me. Now, let this be a warning to you. I will see her. I will take her with me when she’s released. And you will mind your business and treat her the same way you’d treat any other patient. You’re being overprotective because of your dominating status. I need you to see that and take a step back from the woman who is technically still my Sub.”

He looked down, contemplating my words. I could tell. He knew he was wrong for stepping on my toes about Blyss. Had we been inside the club, his interjection into our business wouldn’t have been tolerated.

“She’ll be here for a week or more. During that time, I expect you to seek some counseling. I’m ordering her to have the same. If you want to be the best thing for her, you’ll need to work on yourself. You can’t let guilt run you. She wants things she can’t handle. It’s your job to make her understand what you do is what’s best for her. Would you allow a child who wants to play with knives do it, just because they desperately want to?”

“You’re right. I know you are. I know what I have to do with her. I did allow things to interfere with how I normally run a Sub. Blyss is special. I really have never seen her as a Sub. And I’m not about to look at her as one now. I am, however, going to look at her as someone who needs my love and protection. I will make her understand her limitations.” I put my hand on his shoulder. “You and I are brothers, in a way. We know what it’s like to hold people’s lives in the palms of our hands. And we’ve used that knowledge to help women test their limits. Blyss’ limits are far less than the women we’ve dealt with. I know that. I know that better than anyone in the entire world.”

“I hope so. For her sake.”

“If you think what happened to her under my watch is bad, you have no idea what could’ve happened to her if someone else would’ve won her. I will take care of her. That is a promise.”

“I guess we’re done here, then,” he said despondently. I could tell he wasn’t a hundred percent behind Blyss and me being together, but it really wasn’t up to him. It was up to her.

As he walked away, I grabbed him by the arm. “Dom to Dom, I’m asking you to grant me more visitation with my Sub, Toby.”

He looked at me for a long moment before he nodded. “Give me half an hour to arrange it, then you can go see her. I’ll give you one-hour visits, three times a day. No more than that. She has a lot of other things to do besides see you.”

“Thank you.”

I watched him leave, then fell with my back against the wall. He wasn’t wrong for calling me out. I had to give him that. He was a good man and most likely a great Dom. I was the Dom who had fallen to the wayside. I had changes to make. Many changes. But Blyss wouldn’t be something I dropped from my life. Never her.

After waiting for a half hour, I showed up at the ICU, ready to see my lady. The nurse gave me a nod as I went in. “Sign in, Mr. Masterson. I’ll let you know when your hour is up.”

Fingering the box in my pocket, I went into Blyss’ room to see her sleeping, which made me a little upset. I had a plan, and her being asleep wouldn’t see it happening.

She stirred, though, as I took a seat in a chair I pulled up next to her. “Troy?”

I got up and leaned over her, kissing her cheek, happy she was awake. “It’s me. I got permission to see you three times a day for an hour each time. Isn’t that nice?”

“It is.” She moved her hand slowly. “Look what I can do after only an hour of the rehab nurse moving my arms for me.” She took my hand as she looked at what she’d accomplished.

My heart was pounding. I felt so guilty suddenly. It was my fault she had to work so hard to do such a simple thing. Leaning my head against her chest, I whispered, “Baby, I’m so damn sorry. If I could take this on for you, I would do in a heartbeat.”

I felt her hand move over my shoulder, then into my hair. She breathed in. “Umm …I dreamed about the way you smell. It’s nice having you here. Let’s not talk about what happened and who’s to blame. Let’s just move on already.”

Blinking back tears, I sniffled, then raised my head. “I think that’s a great idea. We have to start moving forward. Into our future.”

“About that,” she said as she frowned. “I want you to know that I love you. I love you more than I knew I could. That said, I’ve made a decision.”

I was beginning to feel extremely nervous. “About?”

“About you and me. If you still want me to go home with you, I will. I’ll accept your help. I do need it, after all. But I don’t want to make any real commitments until I’m fully recovered. I think that’s best.”

Shoving my hand into my pocket, I clutched the box with the engagement ring inside. My proposal would get an answer at that moment that I wasn’t prepared to hear. “If you feel that way, then I’ll respect that.”

She sighed, obviously expecting a fight from me. “Good. I do love you. I want you to know that. But I need to be sure about me. Thank you for understanding that, Troy.”

“Yeah, I get it.” I kind of didn’t get it, but she was so weak I wasn’t about to get into it with her. As she got stronger, I’d see how things would play out. Maybe I’d get her to agree to marry me before too long. I hoped so.

“Thank you.” She smiled at me and I took a seat next to her, taking her hand and holding it.

“Your doctors are pretty protective over you. I want you to know that one named Troy is a man I want you to watch out for. He’s a Dom who’s a member of The Dungeon of Decorum.”

“Really?” Her eyes went wide. “Imagine that. And what did he say to you?”

“It doesn’t matter. He’s the one who gave me permission to see you. But just watch out. You may not be aware of just how persuasive dominating men with power can be. If he wanted to get into your head, he most likely could. You should know, not many of my fellow Doms are happy with me right now. Not with what happened to you. You might get a lot of negative feedback on your old Dom, my love.”

“I won’t listen to them. They don’t know you like I do.”

“No, they don’t. And they don’t know you like I do, either.” I kissed her hand, then held it to my chest. “Just know that I’ll be taking excellent care of you and everything will be fine.”

She nodded, then yawned. “I’m sleepy. It won’t hurt your feelings if I fall asleep, will it?”

“Not one bit. I’m overjoyed just to get to sit here with you and hold your hand. If you wake up and I’m not here, don’t worry. That just means my hour was up. I’ll be back to spend another one with you in no time.”

A smile curled her lips as her eyes closed. “Good. I love you, Troy.”

“And I love you, Blyss. You sleep now.”

I’d never been more content with just being with anyone in my life. Things would work out for us. They had to.

Blyss

I managed to stupefy my doctors and made a remarkable recovery in less time than any of them thought I would. In a matter of a week, I was released, and Troy was taking me back to his family’s home in Napa Valley. The wind blew through my hair, as he’d left the windows down on his Jeep. We held hands and basked in the warm glow of the sun as we made the long trek from Portland.

After a week of counseling, I felt like I really needed to get some more before I made any big decisions. While I thought I’d only need to stay about a week with Troy and his family, he wasn’t too keen on the idea. He never argued with me. He’d just leave things with a, ‘we’ll see.’ He’d really taken to looking after me. I had to admit, he was great at it. But I couldn’t become too spoiled with his undivided attention. One day, I’d have to do things on my own. My therapist warned me about becoming too dependent on anyone. And I had my old problems to consider.

I was lucky that I’d gotten through the pain meds at the hospital without developing an addiction to them. But I may have developed one for Troy. It was something I’d deal with sooner rather than later. I did need him at that time, after all.

The Napa Valley sign came into view and I began to get jittery. “What if they don’t like me, Troy? What if your mother thinks I’m not good enough for you?”

“They’ll love you just like I do. You don’t have to worry a bit. And you are good enough for me. I know you didn’t know me before, but I wasn’t so easy to get along with. You’ve tamed me, baby.” He chuckled, then took my hand and kissed it.

“Tamed,” I mumbled. Maybe I had tamed him. He was adamant that we’d never do any type of BDSM stuff ever again. And I wasn’t to even ask. ‘You’re to put that shit out of your head,’ were his exact words.

The vineyard could be seen just after we fell off the last hill. “There it is. Succulent Winery. What do you think?”

“It’s gorgeous. Wow! And you have no want to stay here? Odd, don’t you think?”

“Well, this life is a little too peaceful for me. Or it was.” He kissed my hand once more. “With you, I might find this is the place for us.”

‘Us’ was a word he said a lot. Even though I kept telling him I wasn’t sure about a future together, he insisted on using that term.

I had been a ‘me’ and only ‘me’ for a long time. But I hadn’t been the ‘me’ I was now—the girl who had some real shit going on in her life for once. I was no longer the idle person who read about other’s trials and tribulations. I had my own to consider, ponder, and generally worry about. Where would I live? What kind of car would I buy? How would the upcoming school year be?

I thought about a lot of things. But living a life of luxury in Napa Valley wasn’t one of them. Yet, Troy was always there in the background of every thought I had, as if he had nothing better to do than hang out with me. It was stupid, and that was one of the reasons I thought of him like an addiction. If you were a drug addict, you made decisions based on when you’d need to get a fix and how far that drug was away from you at all times. That’s exactly how I thought about Troy.

It wasn’t healthy.

When we pulled into the very long and winding road that led up to the monstrous house, I was close to passing out. “And here we are.”

The front door opened and out ran a tall, lithe, woman with dark hair and deep brown eyes. “You must be Blyss.” I was wrapped in her arms upon my exit from the Jeep. The woman smelled like sugar cookies and her arms were warm and welcoming. I’d never felt more welcomed in my life. She stopped hugging me to hold me at arm’s length and look me over. “You are lovely. I can see why my Troy loves you so much. He talks about you all the time.” She put her arm around me, leading me toward the front door. “You can call me Gloria. I’m so happy you’re here. You and I are going to be great friends.”

“It’s nice to finally meet you, Gloria. Your son has told me all about you and his family. You all sound wonderful. And it’s so nice of you to take care of me in my time of need. I have to admit, I’m more than a bit embarrassed about it.”

“Nonsense,” she said as she opened the door. “We’re all just human, after all.”

I was taken aback by the grandeur of the entrance hall. The ceiling was sky high and I could see the stairwell of three floors above us. “This is a gorgeous house, Gloria.”

“And this is only the entrance, Blyss.” She gave my shoulders a squeeze as she looked over her’s to see where Troy was. He was a good ways behind us, as he’d grabbed our bags. “Tell me, dear, do you want your own room, or do you want to stay with Troy in his? I want you to make the decision. Not him. I’ll not be allowing him to rule over you like some kind of a Dom. Not in my home!”

Her honesty was a bit overwhelming. “With him. If that’s okay with you. He’s not overly dominating with me. You don’t have to worry about that.”

“Okay, then.” She led me through a grand room filled with leather and antiques, then we went up a staircase and off to one side. “This is the children’s wing. Our other sons no longer liver here and my husband went on a fishing trip to Mexico. He’ll be back next week. You two will have this wing to yourselves. Are you okay with that?”

I was more than okay with it. It had been too long since Troy and I had been intimate. One can’t get busy with nurses and doctors coming in and out of your room. “I’m okay with it.”

She pushed open one of the large, ornate, wooden doors, and there was a living room. “This is Troy’s suite. Go inside, settle yourself in, then have Troy bring you down to the kitchen. I have a bottle of our best wine breathing. We’ll have a little cheese with it and get to know one another. Doesn’t that sound nice?”

“It sounds fantastic. Thank you, Gloria. We’ll be right down.”

Troy made it in, dropped the bags on the floor, then hugged his mother. “Missed you, Mom.”

She and he rocked as they hugged. “And I missed you. I’m over the moon that you’ll be staying with us for a while.” She stopped the hug and looked at me over her shoulder. “You do know that it’s been my dream to have my sons marry and move back here with us? Has my son told you that?”

“He has. And I think it’s a lovely dream.” I took a seat on the long chenille sofa and put my feet underneath me.

“We’ll be down soon, Mom.” He kissed the top of her head, then sent her out of the room, closing the door behind her and looking at me. “Don’t let any of this overwhelm you, Blyss. It’s just a home.”

“A giant home,” I added as I fanned myself. “One that will require me to build up unused muscles just to get up those stairs.”

His smile made me smile as he came to sit next to me. “I have to admit that I love seeing you here in my room. I could get used to this.”

“You have your Navy thing, and I have school,” I reminded him.

“I know. But this could be home. One day.” He tapped my chest. “If you play your cards right. I’m just saying.”

“Home, huh?” I looked around and sighed. “There are much worse places to call home, aren’t there? One could get used to this.” I took his face between my hands and rubbed noses with his as we’d started doing at the hospital. “How you spoil me!”

“I prefer to think of it as taking care of you, not spoiling. You’re far from spoiled. That said …” He pulled something out of his pocket and placed it in my hand. “That’s for you.”

He’d put an envelope in my hand, and I looked at him quizzically. “And this is?”

“Open it and find out.”

I did as he’d said and found the check from the club. Shock zipped through me as I saw the dollar amount. Nearly a million dollars!

“NO!”

He nodded. “Yes. That’s your money. The money I paid for you. The club didn’t even take their cut. You got it all. Plus, you’ll be getting five hundred thousand dollars a year from The Dungeon of Decorum for the injuries you incurred while on their property. Is that an amount you approve of? If not, I can renegotiate the settlement.”

“Are you kidding me?” I shook my head in disbelief. “Troy, I’m a rich woman!”

“You certainly are.” He pulled me to him and kissed me with a hard kiss. “And I love you.”

I settled back and gazed at him. “And that’s the cherry on top, isn’t it? Your love? I feel like I’ve died and gone to heaven. I’m wealthy, loved, and right now I’m staying in paradise.”

He got up and picked me up, taking me to the next room. “This is our room, Blyss. That’s our bed. This never has to end.”

“Marriage, huh?” I looked around the room, then at him. “Let’s don’t talk like that yet. Let’s let all this settle in my head for a bit.”

He sighed as he rested his forehead against mine. “As you wish, my love.”

Putting me down on his bed, he pushed me back very gently, even though my wounds had healed. I looked up at him and found so much in his eyes. I knew he loved me. There was no doubt. I loved him too, but my life was changing at a rapid pace. Adding marriage was just too much.

“I do love you, Troy. I really do. Please don’t ever think I don’t.” I ran my hands through his thick hair.

He licked his lips, then kissed me. It was soft, sexy, and inviting. My lips parted, accepting him. Our tongues glided and touched, sending energy from one end of my body to the other. It felt as if things were going right back to the way they were meant to be. And that’s when I got a chill that told me to watch out. That was the first time I’d gotten that feeling. The kind of feeling you get when you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop.

I had a gorgeous man who loved me desperately. I had more money than most. I had it all. Now, who’d try to end me?

Troy pulled his mouth from mine, as I’d clutched the collar of his shirt. “You okay, baby?”

I couldn’t seem to let him go. “I suddenly got really afraid that this great time might not last.”

“We’ll have troubles now and again, Blyss. Nothing goes smoothly forever. And if it did, what would be the fun in that?” He pried my hands off him and pushed them to the sides of my head. Then he kissed me again. “Don’t be afraid what might happen. Just love me here in this time and space.”

My apprehension eased, but I felt it linger in the back of my mind. A new thing to fuck with me, it seemed. Would life ever just get easy for me?

Troy

The week flew by and I could see Blyss was getting antsy about leaving. “I should go find an apartment near the campus, Troy.”

“What about doing online classes from here, like we talked about?” I asked her as she swung on the porch swing on the back patio. I’d found out that she could easily do the classes and I could take an extended leave of absence from my naval obligations. I just felt like she was jumping the gun, wanting to hop back into her old life. “Don’t you like it here?”

“Are you kidding me? Who wouldn’t love it here? I mean, your mom and dad are spectacular. Like no one I’ve ever met. You’re so lucky to have them. You really have to make more visits to your home, Troy. Your mom told me you hardly ever visit. This is the longest you’ve been here since you have been in Navy.”

“And I’m not trying to leave now. You are, though. Why is that, exactly? Because I think you’re trying to run away from your feelings, Blyss. Am I, right?”

“By going to school, I’m running away from my feelings? I don’t see how you even came up with that.”

“So tell me what’s wrong with staying here and taking some more time for ourselves. Tell me why you feel the need to rush off after only a week here? Do you really hate it? Just tell me if you do.”

“I don’t hate it.” She cast her eyes down and got off the swing. “It’s just all a bit too comfortable. That’s all.”

“Excuse me for making your life easy, Blyss!” I rolled my eyes and went to take her by the arms. “Look at me.”

She pulled her eyes up to meet mine and I found defiance in them. “I love you. But I want to know I can do things on my own, too.”

“I think you’ve already proven that, Blyss. You’ve lived your life alone up until you met me. I think if you’re addicted to anything, the way you say you are to me, it’s being a loner.”

Her shoulders slumped and she sighed. “Maybe you’re right.” Then she looked back at me. “But I need to know that for myself. I need to be away from you. If I miss you so badly that it hurts, then it’s you I’m addicted to.”

“You will miss me that way. And I’ll miss you that way. That’s what people in love do. They miss the fuck out of each other. You’re not stupid. Stop acting like you are. And stop trying to run away from what we have. This is a real life, Blyss Danner. Deal with it!”

“It’s not that easy, Troy. You don’t understand. I know things won’t always be good. I just know it.” She jerked her shoulders, and I let her go.

I could walk away from her. I could let her go. But what would it accomplish?

“You know your therapist told you that she needed to see you more, but you haven’t gone to this new one but once. Why is that?”

She turned away, unable to look at me. “It’s because she thinks you and I are great for one another. Okay? She’s one of your high school best friend’s mothers, for Christ sakes! She’s never going to tell me that I need you too much.”

“Maybe because she’s smart. I have to admit, you do need to finish college, if for nothing else than to learn more about your own mental hang-ups.”

Her hands flew into the air as her face turned red. “You don’t know anything! Nothing at all! I have issues.”

“Yeah, I know.”

She stopped then. Her brow furrowed and she walked away from me. She went inside, and I took her place on the swing to think about things. Things like why I was trying so fucking hard to get her to stay with me.

I’d miss her, but she’d miss me too. She’d come back. I knew she would. I shook my head. That was a lie. I didn’t think she’d ever come back if she left. I knew she’d go back to being a loner. It was safe that way. She would never admit it, but she wanted that safe little life back.

How could I blame her?

If it hadn’t been for my fuck up, she’d never have been nearly killed and she might not think that way. She was going to move in with me. She’d said so that very night. I just needed to give her the beastly man I could be for a week, then we’d put that whole thing behind us and be a couple.

But I’d fucked up. In the last inning, I’d lost the ball. And I’d lost her.

That spirit of adventure she’d found was gone. Poof!

Back to the quiet life, with no emotions or people who could love or hurt her. That’s where she felt the safest. And that was no one’s fault but my own.

That’s why I didn’t want to let her move into an apartment near campus. I’d lose her forever. I knew it with every fiber of my being. She would go back to the place she felt safe. It was no longer in my arms, the way it had been before I’d sent her down that hallway at the BDSM club that took her away from me entirely.

Going back into the house, I went up to our bedroom to find her and talk to her rationally. “Blyss, look, baby, I’m sorry.” I shut up as I looked around and didn’t see her in the room. She wasn’t anywhere in the suite.

I went to find mom and dad, but neither of them had seen her either. Going from room to room, we all looked for her. She had to have just been sitting alone in one of them, wanting to get away for a and have that safety of being alone.

But door after door, she was nowhere to be found, and we were at a loss. Finally, I took my cell out and called hers. It rang and rang, but she sent it to voicemail. She did that over and over, even when I called her from my parents’ cells and the house phone. She was dodging me. But where the hell could she be? I ran back up to our room and went to the closet. Her things were gone. Every bit of it was gone!

Running downstairs, I grabbed my mother. “She’s gone, Mom! How the hell is she gone? The garage!”

We all three ran to the garage to see if she’d taken any of the cars. They were all there. She couldn’t have left. Could she?

“What about a taxi, Troy?” Mom asked. “I guess she could’ve called one from town. Would she go to Stanford?”

I nodded. “That’s the only place she’d go. What the hell should I do, Mom?”

“I’d say go after her.” She guided me to sit down as I started to sway from the feeling of uneasiness and dread.

Dad moved to the other side of me, holding me up. “Son, you should give her a little time. Did you two have a disagreement of some kind?”

As my ass hit the sofa, my head dropped into my hands. “Yes, we did. She wanted to go find an apartment near campus, and I argued with her about it. I didn’t tell her that I wouldn’t take her, but I didn’t tell her I would. I wanted her to stay here, with me. I wanted her to take classes online and I’d take a leave of absence, and we’d just stay right here.”

“Well, she wanted to go, son. You can’t keep someone in a place they don’t want to be.” Dad patted my shoulder. “No wonder she left.”

Mom sighed as she took a seat next to me. “You should’ve told us about that, honey. We would’ve told you that keeping a person from doing what they want doesn’t work out. You have to let them spread their wings. I want you guys here, too. But I don’t mean for you never to go do what you want or feel you need to.”

I nodded, only partially understanding them. They had no idea what Blyss was about. Not really. She wanted her old life back, and she would never come back to me. “I’m going to go upstairs for a while. If she calls either of you back, please tell her that I love her. I love her more than she can understand. But I’ll leave her alone if I made her feel safer alone than with me.”

“I’m sure that’s not the case,” my father said as I headed out of the room.

I didn’t bother talking to him about it. He had no idea about her. He had no idea how her mind worked. I did. I knew it all too well.

When I got to my room, I laid on the bed, taking her pillow. I breathed in what reminded me of her. “Blyss, damn you. You’re taking my fucking heart with you. You don’t even realize that, do you?”

My cell rang and I hurried to answer it, not looking to see who it was. “I’m looking for Troy Masterson. Have I found him?”

“Yes, and this is?”

“My name is Juan Sandoval. I’m Maria Sandoval’s father. Do you remember my daughter’s name?”

I’d messed around with her a few years back. She was in the Navy too, and we had been in the same place at the same time for about a week. That’s about all I could recall about her. I figured something might have happened to her if her father was calling me. “Yes, sir. I remember your daughter.”

“Well, that’s good to hear. You see, she was killed in action last year. She left a daughter. Tatum turned five last month. She only wanted one thing for her birthday, Mr. Masterson.”

“I’m so sorry to hear about Maria.” I closed my eyes as I recalled her long, dark hair and chocolate eyes. She was a real beauty. “And what was it her daughter wanted?”

“First, I’d like to ask you this.”

“Yes, sir. Anything.”

“Did you love my daughter?”

I had no idea why he’d ask me such a personal thing. She and I had messed around, but no words of love had ever been exchanged. “How much did she tell you about me, if I may ask?”

“She told us a lot about you. She told us that you were a nice man. She told us you were an honorable man.”

I felt like he was leaving out something. “She was a wonderful woman, an excellent soldier, and I was proud to call her a friend, sir. She will be missed. But I have a feeling you’re leaving something out.”

“Oh, did I not mention that she also told us that you are Tatum’s father? And the only thing your daughter wanted for her fifth birthday was to meet her father.”

What the fuck!

Blyss

Tears filled my eyes the entire way to town. The cabbie was nice enough not to ask me any questions and that was appreciated. I had no idea why I’d left Troy’s home. I just had to leave. I’d found myself alone long enough to pack up my things and call a cab. But halfway down the drive, I’d wanted to get out and go back. Only I hadn’t allowed myself to do that.

Troy had called me from every number he could, but I’d sent them all to voicemail and erased all his messages without listening to them. I thought a nice, clean break would be the easiest way to go. But as I sat in a hotel room in Napa Valley, trying to decide how I wanted to get down to Stanford, I couldn’t figure out exactly why I’d left. Troy wasn’t mean to me, he didn’t cheat or lie, and I loved him. So why did I leave him?

I decided to call the therapist I’d seen once since I’d gone home with Troy. She told me she’d come right over to talk to me. Even as I waited for her to arrive, I battled myself about that. Maybe I just wouldn’t let her in when she got here. Maybe I’d leave so she couldn’t find me. All I could think about was being alone and how that felt normal to me. Nothing I’d been doing felt normal, except loving Troy. That felt completely natural. But even that took time to feel that way.

A knock at the hotel room door had me questioning whether to answer it or not. But my body wasn’t letting my head rule it. I got up without thinking and answered the door. “Hi, Sharon. Thanks for coming.” I stepped back and let her in.

She surprised me after I closed the door. I was suddenly wrapped in her arms as we swayed back and forth. “Blyss, you poor girl.” She let me go, then took my hand, pulling me over to the sofa. “I expected to see you at least once more this last week. Our initial session wasn’t deep enough to do you any good work. And now you’ve left Troy. Did he do something to you that you felt compelled to do this?”

“He, um, well, he kind of did do something. I don’t know that it warranted leaving, but I just had this flight response.” I laid back on the sofa and tried to relax, so I could get as much out as I possibly could. I had decisions to make and I felt like I had little time to make them.

“Okay, tell me what he did.” She sat in the chair across from me and crossed her legs, taking a pen and pad of paper out of her bag.

“I want to get a place in Stanford and go to school on campus. He wants me to take online classes and stay at his parents’ place.”

“Did you ask him to come with you to Stanford.” She posed a good question.

I had to ponder it. Had I ever asked him to come with me?

“No.”

“Do you not want him to be with you?”

“I do want him with me. I think.”

“You think? Well, that’s interesting. Don’t you think so?”

“I love Troy. I’ve never loved anyone in my entire life. But I’m out of my element. I just want to get back to how life was. This was a little vacation for me. The plan to take on a role for a few months, then I’d get back to my normal life. Alone.”

“Alone? Hmm.” I looked over and saw her writing things, then she looked at me. “Being alone in this world isn’t only bad for your psyche, but it’s dangerous too. We’re not solitary beings. We’re meant to live in packs, just like cavemen did at the beginning of time. Our minds and bodies are hardwired for making our own little packs or families.”

“But being alone is …” I searched for the word to use to explain how it made me feel when I was alone. “Safe. It’s safe. I can blend in and become nearly invisible. When I’m with Troy, I stand out. He demands attention wherever he goes. He’s just that kind of man.”

“And you don’t like attention?” She sat there with her pen poised as she waited for my answer.

“I have never liked it. And once I had it, it got my ass beaten. So, no, I don’t like attention.”

“That was an unfortunate thing that happened to you, Blyss. But it was a thing that could’ve been avoided. You took risks.”

“I agree. Life with Troy is a risk too. I don’t want to be hurt anymore.” I turned to lie on my side and drew my knees up, wrapping my arms around them.

Sharon looked me dead in the eyes. “How do you think Troy will hurt you?”

Words spilled from my mouth without giving my brain time to think. “He could stop loving me. That would hurt more than anything I’ve ever gone through.”

“Love can be scary, even to individuals who’ve experienced it before with their parents. And you haven’t had that type of love, either. But you know what they say about facing what scares you, right?” she said with care and concern.

I nodded. She was right. I knew I was running from fear, and that’s never a good thing. But I was far from ready to make any real commitments to Troy. But I didn’t want to leave him.

“I should give him a call. I should tell him that I want to go to school on campus. I get more out of it that way. But I should give him the choice to come with me or not. I didn’t mean to hurt him, and I know I have.” I looked at my therapist with tears in my eyes. “What if he doesn’t want me anymore? What if he thinks I’m too messed up?”

“He’s well aware of what all you’ve been through and he loves you, despite it all. I think you can trust in the love he has for you and it being long-lasting, Blyss. But even if something happens and that love is lost, it doesn’t mean it’s the end of the world. People go on after a love they thought would last forever ends. It happens. People get over it. But it leaves you with the experience, and that’s a good thing. It makes us more well-rounded.”

She was making sense. “You’re right. So, I should give him a call, tell him what I really want to do, and see if he wants to come with me, right?”

“I don’t know why you’re asking me that question. Aren’t you an adult?” She smiled and winked at me as she got up. “I’m going to leave you with that thought. If you do go to Stanford, give me a call. I can refer you to a colleague of mine who practices there. That way I can share what you and I have worked on, helping you to get past that initial consultation stage.”

I hopped up and walked her to the door. She surprised me with another hug, and I hugged her back. “Thank you, Sharon. You’re pretty great. I hope I can be as helpful as you are one day.”

“You’ll be a fine psychologist, Blyss. It’s always good to seek help when you need it, even if you have tons of education about such things. When looking at others, it’s much easier to pinpoint their needs. It’s harder to do that for ourselves.”

“I can see that. I’ll be in touch.”

Closing the door behind her, I leaned back on it. Did I really want to go to college on campus, or was that just a way to escape back into solitude?

There were decisions to make. So many of them. And I was trying to rush things. I needed to take a step back and evaluate everything. I needed to take my time and calm the hell down. I had just been through a very traumatic event, after all. Now was not the time to make big decisions. Troy was right about that. He was trying to protect me and help me get better, both physically and mentally. And for his help and concern, I ran off.

What a bitch move!

Taking my cell out of my pocket, I made the call to him. I had to fix my mess, and I prayed Troy was still willing to help a fool like me.

Troy

“What do you mean, I’m some girl’s father and she wants to see me? I can’t be her father. Maria and I messed around.” I stopped myself as I thought about the fact that this was her father I was talking to. “We dated for only a week. How could I be her kid’s father?”

Mr. Sandoval’s tone was stern, “I shouldn’t have to explain the facts of life to you. You should be well aware of how things work in that department.”

“I know how that all works. I just don’t know why she wouldn’t have told me about being pregnant. Do you know why she would keep the kid a secret, sir?”

“She didn’t want to burden you, is what she told us. Her mother and I have taken care of Tatum this last year, after her mother’s death. She’s always lived with us. This little girl is more than just special to us, Mr. Masterson. She is all we have left of our daughter. I don’t want to give her up. I won’t give her up. But she wants to know you, her father, and I don’t want to deny her that.”

“Sir, with all due respect, isn’t she better off not knowing me? If you want to keep her, won’t that interfere with her and I making any kind of a real bond? And where is it that you live anyway?”

“Santa Ana is where we live. And I’ve thought the very same things you have. We’ve talked to her a lot about how she’d have to go for a night or two because of the distance. We know you reside at the base in San Diego. Maria has kept tabs on you. Your family owns a winery in Napa Valley too. With Maria’s death, we’ve lost track of you, have there been any major changes in your life since then?”

“Such as?” I felt he was getting at something. The man spoke on the evasive side, it seemed.

“Maria told us that you were a man who dated many women. In my culture, we call that a mujeriego—a womanizer. And that’s not the kind of man I want in Tatum’s life. I’d rather tell her that her father was also killed in action if that’s the case. So, is that the case, Mr. Masterson?”

Was I still that kind of man? I knew I had been, right up until I fell for Blyss. But if Blyss was truly gone, would I go back to that lifestyle?

Weighing my true feelings, I knew I was committed to Blyss. I had tons of hope she’d come back soon. I knew she’d miss me. “No, I’m no longer that man, sir.”

“That’s good to hear. I have one more thing I’d like to know. You see, if you are a single man, I see no reason to bring this little girl into that kind of life. I want her to have a couple she can come to know as her family too. If you’re an unmarried man, I won’t take this any further.”

“Unmarried?” I asked as I shook my head. Who did this guy think he was? “Look, Mr. Sandoval, if this kid is mine, you damn well better know that I could take her if I wanted to, no matter what the circumstances are. I have more money than most to get the best lawyers. Maria never gave me the slightest clue that I had a kid. That’s got to be illegal.”

“We’ll leave the country with her, and you’ll never find us. I have connections that could help us do just that. We’re aware of your great wealth, Mr. Masterson. We’ve always been prepared to hide her if that became necessary. Like I said before, we love her, and we’ll do anything for her. That includes giving her the father she’s asking for, but only if you are a man I feel can love her the way only a father can. If you haven’t even gotten married yet, and you’re already in your thirties, then I know you aren’t the right kind of man to be in her life. Don’t think you can push me around. You cannot!”

The wheels in my head were turning. I had a daughter!

Did I want one? Was I ready to be there for a child? Did I have a choice?

If the kid was mine, I owed it to her to give her the life she could have as my child. How could I deny my own blood what was truly hers? How could I live with myself, knowing there was a little girl who wanted her daddy and that’s all she asked for on her birthday, no less, but I had refused her?

The answer was plain and simple. I couldn’t. “I’m married, Mr. Sandoval. My wife and I have been together for less than a year. We live in Napa Valley now, at my family home. I’d love nothing more than for you and your wife to bring Tatum here. But first, I want a DNA test done to be sure. I see no reason for me or this child to begin a relationship until it’s certain that I am her father.”

“That’s already been done. Maria took a sample of your …how do I say this tactfully? Hell, I’m just going to say it …semen. She got some of it from a condom she had a friend of hers use when she was with you when Tatum was two. I’m sure you were never told about that little incident.”

“Damn!” I was shocked at the measures Maria had taken—everything but telling me I might be the father of her kid. “You know, she could’ve told me, right? I would’ve done the right thing.”

“We were all afraid of how that would turn out. You had a bad reputation. None of us wanted you to play daddy only when you wanted to. Maria didn’t want to have to ask you about every little thing she did with her daughter, something she’d need to do if you were aware of the child.”

“So, just to avoid me, she went to extreme measures to make sure I was the father, then still left me out of her life? Not cool!”

“You would never understand. I don’t expect you to. Tatum was all we cared about. We did what was best for her, not you. I have the documentation that proves she is your daughter. You can take it to your lawyers if you so desire. That’s up to you. Now, would you like to set up a date for our arrival? How long will we be staying?”

“I’ll talk to my family about that and be back in touch with you.” A second call came in and I saw it was Blyss. My heart dropped a beat. I was so relieved. “I’ll save your number and call you soon, Mr. Sandoval. Goodbye.” I ended the call without him saying another word. “Blyss! Thank God you called, baby. Where are you?”

“I’m just in town at a hotel. I jumped the gun. Fear had me running. I called Sharon, and she came to talk to me. Things just need to slow down. Everything feels rushed. I need time.”

Time was suddenly a thing I didn’t have. “Are you saying you want time apart?”

“No, I just need time to think about things. Make good decisions. I’m not sure if I want to go to Stanford for the classes or to get back to my old life. I don’t want to make the wrong decision.”

“The fact you don’t want time apart is music to my ears, baby. I’ll come get you. Where are you?”

“In a hotel. You understand about me needing time, right?”

“Sure, I do.” But I needed something from her.

Would she give me what I needed—a wife?

Blyss

As I waited for Troy to come get me, I thought about my life and how empty it had been. Then I’d found Troy and it had felt different. Love was a little on the heavy side. It grounded me, it seemed. There wasn’t just me to think about any longer. Troy had to be put into things too. I had to consider what he needed and wanted out of a relationship too. It wasn’t all about me. He’d left the marriage thing off the table since I’d been in the hospital. I was thankful for that. Living together was one thing. A legal marriage was a whole new ballgame.

A knock came to the door, and when I opened it, Troy scooped me up and took me straight to the bed. “Baby, you scared the shit out of me!”

He laid down with me, kissing me with a hard kiss that spoke to me more than anything else he could say. He had been afraid, and I hated that I had made him feel that way. I wrapped my arms around him, kissing him back, hoping he could feel the love I had for him. We rolled around the bed, only allowing our mouths to part when an item of clothing had to be pulled off.

By the time I ended up on my back, we were naked and gazing into each other’s eyes. I pushed his thick, dark hair back. “I love you, Troy. I’m sorry.”

The pad of his thumb ran over my lower lip. “I forgave you before you even called me. I love you, Blyss. Don’t ever run off again. We can talk through anything. You’ll see.”

With a sigh, he kissed me again, then moved his body between my legs, spreading me open for him. We groaned delightfully as he entered me. I raked my nails across his back as electricity moved through me. “Troy, my God, what you do to me.”

“What you do to me, Blyss, is beyond imagination.” He made a long stroke up, then went in deep.

Our bodies never could deny the chemistry we shared. The way I felt when he had me in his arms should’ve been enough for me to believe our love was true. Every time we made love, I wondered why I ever worried about him loving me forever. It was obvious he loved me very much. And I knew I loved him. I just needed some time for it all to settle into my mind that our love could last.

Kissing a trail along my neck, he bit it, making me moan, then he moved down until he had my breast in his mouth, sucking, nipping, and licking until it was swollen and hard. He kissed his way down to the other and did the same things to it. He had me on fire as I arched up to meet his cock. I ran my hands over his muscular back and my feet up the backs of his legs, relishing his amazing body.

I was slipping into the darkness of the world he and I went to when our bodies came together, a place where only he and I lived, a place I wanted to go to all the time. I had to admit that if there was anything I was addicted to, it was making love to him. Every little touch drew out unimaginable responses from me, be it a moan, a groan, or a shot of pure electric heat. Something occurred with each touch and movement.

Kissing his shoulder as he devoured my breast, I made my way up to his ear. “I am yours, master.”

He bit my nipple, then pulled up to look at me. His eyes were dark with desire. “You are mine. You will always be mine. And you will always do as I say. That means you will never run away from me again. No matter what.”

“I will never run away again.” I moaned as he swirled his cock and plunged in deeper. “Why would I leave this?”

“Why, indeed?” He moved down my body, pulling his cock out of me and making me smile as he smiled at me, then trailed his tongue down my body until he was at my clit.

His intimate kiss had me closing my eyes. I gripped the sheets as he ran his hot tongue through my folds. The way I wanted him should be illegal. The way I wanted him to covet me was probably bad, but I couldn’t find it in myself to care. His teeth grazed my clit, sending pure pleasure sweeping through my body from my head to my toes, which were curling from the sensation. Swirling his tongue around my clit, he ignited an orgasm that had my body shaking.

Flipping me over on my hands and knees, he shoved his fat cock back into me as he slapped my ass. “Yes, baby, cum all over me!”

He took me hard and fast, making my orgasm go on and on and going even deeper. I was a bundle of ecstasy, crying out my need for him as he took me.

When his cock filled me with his juices, I came harder. His jerking cock made my walls shiver with desire. We fell in a heap, our breathing loud and ragged. His lips pressed against the back of my neck. “Fuck, I love you, baby.”

He turned me over and kissed me. I loved the way we tasted together in his mouth. When we were together, I loved everything. Every movement and kiss. I loved it all. I could see needing a solid week of us together in bed, doing nothing else.

When he eased his mouth away from mine, I said, “We should stay right here this entire week. Order room service and never go out or get dressed. Make love, sleep, bathe together, and do nothing else.”

“Hmm. That does sound nice. I could make you a deal. If I do that for you, will you do something for me?” He leaned up on his elbow and rested his hand on his palm as he stroked my stomach.

“If you do that for me,” I ran the back of my hand over his five-o’clock-shadowed cheek. “I will do anything you want from me.”

He took my hand and kissed it. “Good.” He rolled away from me for a second, then came back with a little black box. When he opened the lid, a giant diamond sparkled at me. “Marry me, Blyss Danner.”

My heart stopped as I looked at that rock, but my brain was still going. I looked him in his blue-green eyes. “Not yet, Troy.”

A frown filled his face. “I had an idea you’d say that.”

“Then why’d you ask? I just told you I wanted things to slow down. That’s not slowing down.” I was a bit aggravated that he had spoiled the mood for me.

I cut my eyes to the side and huffed, then he took me by the chin to make me look at him. “I need you to marry me, Blyss. I’ve got a problem only that will fix.”

“How dramatic, Troy.” I wasn’t about to fall for any drama.

“I have a daughter.”

I went numb instantly. “I was gone for like five minutes, Troy. How the fuck did you get a daughter in that short amount of time?”

“A phone call came from the father of a woman I messed around with about six years ago. She was in the Navy. She died a year ago, and the little girl had her fifth birthday recently. The only thing she wanted was to meet her daddy. So, Juan Sandoval, her grandfather, gave me a call. But being a part of her life has some stipulations. I can no longer be a womanizer.”

“Which you aren’t.”

He kissed the tip of my nose. “Which I’m not anymore, thanks to you. But he also wanted …wait, wanted isn’t strong enough. He demanded that I be married or he wouldn’t allow her to know me. He wants me to be stable in every possible way.”

“Well, if you are her real father, you can just get a lawyer to handle that. You don’t have to do what he says.” I wasn’t about to get roped into a marriage just because some man had control issues.

“He said he’d take her and hide out in another country. They already have plans all set up to do that if I ever tried to take her away from them.”

“You’ll need to have a DNA test done before you go jumping through hoops, Troy.” I wasn’t going to let him force me into something I wasn’t ready for.

“She had one done. It seems that Maria Sandoval kept tabs on me and even sent in one of her friends to have sex with me, then took the filled condom to get a test done. It came back positive that I am the girl’s father. Mr. Sandoval has the documents to prove that.”

I was out of things to say, except for one thing. “Is being a father something you want, Troy? I mean, the girl is with her grandparents. I’m sure she’s in a loving home. You don’t have to do this if it’s not something you want.”

“I want to see her. I want to be there for her.” He ran the back of his hand over my cheek as his eyes went misty. “Knowing you gave me the reason to make this decision very quickly. I don’t want to leave my blood out of my life. I might not have known about her before, but now that I do, I want her in my life permanently. And that means I need you to marry me. I already told her grandfather that I had been married for a little less than a year. Please don’t let me down, baby.”

My heart was aching. He was doing the right thing by the little girl and that was admirable. But would I marry him so he could have her in his life?

“I don’t know if I want to cement things with a real marriage, Troy.” A thought emerged, then came out of my mouth, “But we can have a fake one. I’m sure your parents will go along with it.”

“A fake marriage?” he asked as he looked a little excited about it. “I’ll take it!”

He slid that ring on my finger and kissed me. that the kiss turned passionate quickly and had us doing what we’d already done all over again. I supposed a fake marriage should have a fake honeymoon in a nice hotel too.

I didn’t have time to wonder if I’d made the right decision. Things were moving fast again, but how could I ask him to slow down getting to know his kid?

Troy

Telling my parents about having a daughter I was never told about proved harder than I expected. It was my mother who was worried it could all be a scam, meant to bilk us out of millions. She put her foot down hard and heavy. Lawyers would get to the bottom of things before the girl and her grandparents came to our home.

My father wasn’t a fan of the fake marriage Blyss and I were hoping to pull off. I found myself explaining to him, “Dad, it’s temporary. Once everyone sees that I’m not an unstable man who will be bad for Tatum, we can come clean. And I do plan on marrying Blyss someday anyway.”

“But down the road,” Blyss added. “Way down the road, like years from now.”

I turned to scowl at her. “We got it, Blyss. It’ll be a while. Damn! You don’t have to rub it in.”

“Sorry.” She moved on to mess with the computer. She was trying to find a California marriage license to forge our names on and a date from nine months ago. Just in case the Sandoval’s wanted proof of our marriage.

I had already bought us a nice set of wedding bands that we were wearing. But there was the little thing about people in town knowing we were married.

That’s where Dad wasn’t on board with us. I had the bright idea of making up a little article to tell the citizens of our town that I’d married while in San Diego and we were just now announcing the marriage. Just in case the Sandoval’s went around asking questions.

I was trying to cover all the bases, but Dad thought that was going too far. “Troy, it’s bad enough that we’re lying for you. Don’t bring the townspeople into this scam you’ve cooked up.”

“He’s right, Troy,” Mom chimed in. “Let’s leave it within the family. If they ask, then you’ll just tell them that you lived in Stanford and married there but never put the announcement in the papers.”

“Or you could just stop this nonsense altogether.” Dad wagged his finger at me as he frowned. “I don’t like lying. I never have.”

My cell dinged and I saw Mr. Sandoval had sent me what I had requested—the first picture I’d ever see of my daughter. Unlike my mother, I had accepted that she was mine. And when I opened up the text, I found her staring right at me. “Oh, my God. Mom, look at her!”

My mother, Blyss, and Dad all moved in behind me to look at the little five-year-old who had blue-green hazel eyes under a crop of thick, dark lashes. Blyss put her hand on my shoulder. “She looks like you, baby.”

“Oh, my!” Mom’s hand went to her heart. “Oh, my goodness. She’s my granddaughter!”

Dad patted me on the shoulder. “She’s a little doll, son. I think she’s already stolen my heart.”

With that one picture, all the lawyer bullshit went out the window. She was mine and we all knew it. Then Blyss walked out of the room. Confused, as I saw her head hanging low, I got up to follow her. “Blyss?”

Mom grabbed my arm. “She wanted to have your children, Troy. I can tell. Be easy with her, son.”

With a nod, I headed out of the room and found Blyss had only made it to the nearest bathroom, where she was bawling like a baby. I knocked on the door. “Baby, let me in.”

She sniffled, “I’m okay. I just had to pee.”

“You’re crying. I hear you. Let me in.”

The door unlocked and I went inside to see her red-rimmed eyes. “I’m sorry. I am. I’m glad you have a kid. I am. I just …” She bit her lip as she tried not to burst into a sob.

I ran my arms around her. “You just wanted my first child to be with you. I know.”

Her arms wrapped around me as we rocked back and forth. “I wanted all of your children to be with me. Only me, Troy. Is that selfish of me? Is that too much to ask for?”

“It’s neither thing. Of course you wanted that. You wouldn’t be normal not to want that. But she’s here, she’s mine, and I want you to love her just as much as I do. Her mother is dead, Blyss. She’ll need you too.”

Her body was shaking as she tried to get her emotions under control. “She will need a mother. But I have no idea how to be one. No idea at all!” She lost her battle with the tears and fell apart.

With everything that had been on my mind, I hadn’t thought about how Blyss would take the whole thing. I was foolish to think that it wouldn’t affect her negatively. She had a jealous streak a mile wide, after all.

“I’m sorry. I am.” I hugged her tighter. “If this was turned around, and it was you who had a long-lost kid, I don’t know how I’d take it. But I think I’d learn to love anyone who was part of you.”

“The plans I had for us are just all screwed up now. If we ever have a baby, it won’t be as special as I wanted it to be. And I know that sounds selfish, but I wanted to be the one to give you a baby.” She wailed some more and I hugged her still.

“Our baby will be special. Hell, Blyss, every baby will be special. Don’t let this get to you. I want this to be a happy thing for both of us. You and I get to practice being parents on a kid who’s already past all the nasty baby stuff. No diapers to change, no midnight feedings, none of that bad stuff.”

She sniffed and looked up at me. “That is a good point. She’ll be easier to take care of. But will she like me? Or will she want you all to herself? And would I be a terrible person not to want her to have you all to herself?”

“She’s not going to get between us, Blyss. Don’t worry. Now, let’s wash your face. You’ve got it all red and blotchy from crying.” I turned on the faucet and pulled a washcloth out from the linen closet.

Picking her up, I sat her down on the vanity and washed away her tears. She took me by the wrist and smiled. “You’ll be a wonderful dad. And I’ll do my best to be worthy of your daughter.”

Kissing her on top of the head, I said, “I know you will. I never doubted you for a second. This is going to be fine, Blyss. You’ll see.”

As I finished cleaning her up, I thought about how different my life was about to be. I had tons to plan. I wanted my daughter with me, not going back and forth between her grandparents and me. I had some figuring out to do, and I’d need Blyss to agree to one very important thing.

But would she do it?

“Troy, when are you going to let them come?” She took the cloth from me and held it over her swollen eyes.

“This weekend. I need to ask you to do one more thing for me, Blyss. It’s about your school.”

She pulled the cloth away. “You want me to take the online classes and you want us to stay here, don’t you?”

“Yes.” I ran my hands up and down her arms.

“For how long?” I could see she was reading me. She knew what I was going to say before it even came out of my mouth. My eyes told her what I wanted and she shook her head. “I can’t promise you forever, Troy. Not yet.”

“When?”

Her chest was heaving as she began to breathe harder. “I don’t know. I can’t answer that. You want me to make decisions I just can’t yet. And what about your Naval career?” She searched my eyes for the answer.

But I didn’t have one. “I don’t know about that. I don’t have to re-enlist. I can put that behind me. I do have a family to live for now. I never had anything before. I think knowing I’d leave behind people who love me and count on me would be a bad thing as far as missions go.”

She nodded. “If you went on a mission, I don’t know what I’d do. Freak out until you got back—that’s a given. But this is the government we’re talking about here. They don’t just let you out. Not right away.”

“I’ll have to give them the time I said I would. Another year. I could be sent on missions during that time. But I’d make sure to stay out of danger’s path. Knowing I’d have you and Tatum to come home to would make me stay as safe as I possibly could.”

“And after you get out, what would you do with yourself?” she asked as she eyed me. “Because I’m not about to give up my career. I’m not going to sit around this house like some old retired person. Staying here isn’t exactly a reality, Troy.”

“You can make a practice in Napa Valley.” I turned around to open the door, and she followed me out. “And I could work in the family business. I have a daughter to teach about it all now.”

“Yes, you do, don’t you?” She sighed. “You have lots to do with her.” She was starting to sound jealous and that was worrisome.

Would Blyss be jealous of my daughter? And how the hell would I fix it if she was?

Blyss

The day came when we were to meet Troy’s daughter face to face. I’d never seen the man so nervous. And I couldn’t recall a time I’d been that nervous either. I held his hand as we stood side by side, waiting outside the front door with his parents.

“I’m so excited!” his mother gushed. “It’s like Christmas when I was a kid. Only this time, it’s not some toy I’m getting. It’s a little granddaughter!” She clapped her hands and jumped up and down with excitement.

The car came into view and a lump lodged in my throat. It was time to see how I’d be able to handle everything. I’d battled myself over feeling worried, angry, and jealous over the kid. I reminded myself constantly that I never wanted anyone to experience not being wanted. Not ever!

I wasn’t about to treat some innocent child like I didn’t want her around, no matter what I had to do to make that happen. My guts were twisting and I took a deep breath to help ease that uncomfortable feeling.

The car stopped and Troy tugged me along with him to go meet them. “She’s probably going to be shy. That’s how I was when I met new people,” I told him. “Don’t let that get to you.”

“I won’t. Thanks for being here with me.” He kissed my cheek and gave my hand a squeeze. “I appreciate it more than you can understand.”

“I know you do. I’m glad I can do this for you.”

The passenger door opened and Mrs. Sandoval got out. Troy smiled at her. “Hello, you must be Mrs. Sandoval. I’m Troy.”

She looked at him with no emotion on her face. “I can see that. It’s nice to meet you. This must be your wife, Blyss.”

I extended my hand, and we shook them. Then she turned around to get the little girl out of the backseat as her husband came around to meet us. We exchanged hellos as my eyes stayed trained on the back door that Troy’s firstborn would soon get out of.

She was smaller than I thought she’d be. She was timid. I had a feeling she’d be that. I had a little gift for her and eased it behind my back to Troy. He took it and said, “Well, hello, Miss Tatum.” Holding out the little teddy bear with a pretty pink ribbon around one ear, he handed it to her. “This little fella wanted to hang out with you. Is that okay?”

She took the bear and cuddled it. “It’s cute. Thank you.” She looked down at the ground, then back up at Troy. “You got my eyes.”

He smiled and let my hand go so he could squat in front of her. “And you have mine.” He held out his arms. “Wanna come with me?” She nodded and moved into his arms. He hugged her as he picked her up and tears blurred my vision. They looked so much alike, and I could tell they would be inseparable. I thought I’d feel jealous, but I felt happy. I was even happier when he looked at me and a tear ran down his cheek. “Welcome to your new home, Tatum. I’m so happy to have you here.”

I followed right behind him as we all went inside. Troy’s parents were introducing themselves to Tatum’s grandparents as they followed behind us. I noticed his mother wiping tears out of her eyes and wiped mine too. I’d never seen anything so beautiful. And I knew, without a doubt, that little girl had just gained an entire family who would love her dearly. It was the greeting I’d always wanted but never got when I was moved from place to place.

Once we were inside, I took a seat on the far end of the sofa, leaving Troy to start bonding with his daughter. He sat down with her on his lap and looked at me. “What are you doing? Get over here.”

“You two should …”

His eyebrows raised. “Blyss, it’s not us two. We’re a family. Now, come here.”

Getting up, I looked at the little girl who looked at me. Her dark hair was pulled into two pigtails that spiraled down to her shoulders. “You have very pretty hair, Tatum.”

“So do you.” She smiled shyly, then buried her face in Troy’s chest. “Is she your wife?”

“She is,” he lied to her. It sent a chill through me that he had to do that.

“I think she’s pretty,” she said, then giggled.

“Me too.” He took my hand and pulled me to sit next to him. “Tatum, I want you to take this any way you want to. Fast, slow, however you want. I’m your daddy and this is your mommy, okay? But you can call us whatever you want to. My name is Troy and her name is Blyss.”

I felt horrible. I was as close to puking as one can get without it erupting all over the place. I wasn’t her mommy, and I felt it was wrong to tell her such a thing. He and I hadn’t talked about him telling her that. I was feeling angry at him, but then that little girl raised her head and smiled at me.

I gulped back the bile that had risen in my throat as she reached out and ran her little fist over my cheek. “I miss my mommy. You don’t look like her. But I want you to be my mommy now. Okay?”

I couldn’t stop the tears from flowing. They oozed right on out of my eyes. I took her hand and held it to my cheek. “Baby girl, nothing would make me happier than to be your mommy.”

Her smile brought something to my heart it had never felt before. That heavy feeling went a few pounds heavier as love for her was added into it.

Troy chuckled. “Fast it is, then.” He took her by the chin. “I’m glad you’re here, Tatum. I have so much to show you.”

She gulped and said, “Daddy, I have to pee.”

Everyone laughed, and Troy got up to take her to the bathroom. I stayed put, but he held out his hand. “Come on, Mommy. Daddy has no clue how to help a little girl do her business.”

Out we went, leaving the others to talk amongst themselves while our new little family went to take care of business. I was overwhelmed with emotions. There were so many of them, it seemed quite possible I could pass out from experiencing so many at one time.

Tatum’s shyness was evaporating at lightning speed. “I knew ‘bout you for a long time, Daddy. But Papa said you just found out ‘bout me. He said you were happy when he told you ‘bout me. Were you?” She stared into his eyes and I had to laugh.

“I was very happy to hear about you.” He kissed the tip of her nose and she giggled.

The sound was amazing. I loved it. I loved all of it. And I loved Troy for making me a part of it all. The man had filled up my vacant world without even trying to.

As I helped Tatum undo her little rhinestone belt and helped her with the zipper, she chatted away. “How did you and my daddy meet?”

I was stumped. I hadn’t thought about how that story would go at all. Then Troy’s voice came through the door. “We met at a night club and Daddy fell in love instantly.”

“Oh!” she squealed as she tried to climb up on the toilet.

“Shall I help you, Tatum?”

“Yes, please. I don’t want to fall in. I did one time and it was yucky and wet on my bobo.”

I helped her up and nodded. “That does sound bad.”

“So, did you love my daddy, insantly, impatnly…” she was having trouble with that word.

So I helped her out. “Instantly?”

“Yes! Did you? Cause my Daddy is handsome. I bet you did.”

“I did fall in love with him instantly.” Troy laughed and I pounded on the door. “What’s so funny out there?”

“Oh, nothing.”

I finished up Tatum’s potty time and we washed our hands, then went back out where Troy scooped her up and kissed her cheek. She put her little hands on his cheeks and kissed the tip of his nose. “I think I love you insanitily too.”

We laughed at how hard she tried to say the word right but couldn’t manage it. “Tatum, I’ve loved you from the moment I knew about you. And I think it’s time to show your grandparents their new home. We’re all a big family now. You can see them all the time too.”

Happiness radiated off her pretty little face as we went into the main living area. His mother got up. “Are we ready to take the Sandoval’s out to their new home?”

“We are,” Troy said, then we all walked through the house to get to the back door.

There was a lavish guest house on the other side of the backyard. Three bedrooms and four baths, along with three living areas, an office, and a bonus room that was all windows and filled with plants. Troy’s mom called it a green room.

The outside matched the main home beautifully, with dark woods and brown stones. A three-car garage was attached to the guest house too. The third bay was opened to reveal the golf cart that was in it. Troy’s father pointed out, “That’s for your use, Juan. Feel free to use it to go all over the winery. Make this place your home. We want you to feel absolutely comfortable here.”

Mrs. Sandoval was fanning herself. “This is just so beautiful! My goodness. Our old car will look even older in these surroundings.”

Mr. Sandoval was quick to add, “Never mind that, Lucy. I’ll get us a new one as soon as I can afford it.” He looked at Troy’s father with pride. “I retired a few years ago. Our budget is pretty strict, but I won’t bring the beauty of this place down with our car. I’ll keep the garage closed.”

Troy’s parents looked at one another, then his father winked. “Oh, I think we can set you up with something. We have fifteen cars. We can afford to let you two have a couple of them.”

Mrs. Sandoval put her hand to her chest, and I hurried to her side, putting my arm around her. “Please don’t let this overwhelm you, Mrs. Sandoval. We’re all family now. And family takes care of each other. These wonderful people taught me that. You’ll never find better people in the whole world than the Mastersons.”

Troy opened the front door and in we went. “Oh, my goodness!” Tatum shouted. “You’re giving this to Momo and Papa, Daddy?”

“This will be their home for as long as they want. They took such good care of you that I wanted to do something for them.” He kissed her cheek, something he just couldn’t seem to stop doing.

“This is too much!” Mrs. Sandoval said as she looked around the gorgeous home.

“Nonsense. We have a maid who cleans this home three times a week. And you can use our cook’s apprentice whenever you want. A groundskeeper takes care of the outdoors. You have no need to worry about a thing,” Troy’s mom said as she went to her and took her by the hand. “Come on. I want to show you the master suite. It has this great Jacuzzi tub.” Off they went as his father took Mr. Sandoval to show him some interesting man things.

“Do I have a bedroom here?” Tatum asked.

We’d made her one right next to ours, in hopes we’d get to settle her into a routine of living in the main house. Troy looked at me with a bit of worry in his expression.

I stepped in. “Well, there are three bedrooms here, and when Daddy and I are out of town, then you can sleep here. But we have your room all ready for you. It’s right next to ours. We’d like you to sleep there, Tatum. Daddy wants to read you bedtime stories. Wouldn’t that be nice?”

“It would,” she said hesitantly. “But what if I get scared?”

“We put a little monitor right next to your bed. All you have to do is call out for us and we’ll wake up and rush to you.” I patted her on the back. “How does that sound?”

“It sounds like I want to go see my new bedroom. Can we do that now?” The smile she wore made my heart leap.

“Can we, Daddy?” I asked him.

“Sure.” He called out to everyone else, “My little princess wants to see her new bedroom, so we’re taking her to see it. We’ll meet you guys in the dining room at dinner.”

Tatum’s grandmother came out of the hallway. “You sure you want to stay over there, honey? You can stay with us, you know. We don’t want to rush you.”

“I want to go see my bedroom. I think I want to stay in it.” Tatum kissed her father’s cheek. “I love them already, Momo.”

Her grandmother nodded, and I saw a tear. “You go with your daddy and mommy, baby. Me and Popo are right here when you want to see us. We’re really glad that you love them already.”

“Me too!” Tatum shouted.

Off we went to show her the bedroom we’d put a lot of thought into. It was all going smoothly, something that had never happened when I went to a new place. I was happy the little girl, who’d lost her mother, wasn’t having similar experiences to mine. And I’d try hard to make sure she never did.

Troy

Our first night with Tatum was at hand and I was so worried she’d want to go sleep at her grandparents’ house that it made my stomach hurt. Blyss was drying Tatum’s hair after she’d given her a bubble bath. I heard them laughing and singing. It melted my heart in ways I didn’t know possible.

We’d bought a bunch of children’s books that I looked at as I sat on the edge of her bed. It looked like Cinderella’s coach that took her to the ball. Tatum had fallen in love with the room. That was a no-brainer, Blyss had said. I was happy things had gone so smoothly, but I had to be honest--bedtime was something I’d heard horror stories about when little kids were involved.

When the two finally emerged from Tatum’s private bathroom, I had to smile. She was all decked out in a pretty, little, pink nighty and some satin slippers that matched. Her dark curls hung to the middle of her back and I’d never seen a prettier little girl in my whole life.

I had to get up, pick her up, and hug her. “Oh my goodness. Daddy’s little girl looks so pretty. I could just eat you up, princess!”

Her giggle was already ruling me. I’d do anything to hear it.

“Should I leave you to it then, Daddy?” Blyss asked as she headed toward the door.

She was bound and determined to let me have alone time with Tatum. It’s not that I was afraid of that. I wasn’t. Not one bit. But I want Blyss and Tatum to form a bond too. I wanted my little family to have a tight bond, all three of us.

“Please stay,” Tatum cried out. “Please, Mommy! You can snuggle me while Daddy reads. Okay?”

Blyss was helpless to let the little girl down. “Okay, I’ll cuddle you.”

I put Tatum under the blanket as Blyss climbed up and snuggled up to her. Tatum was in hog heaven. She was eating up all the attention we were giving her, and I was glad she was.

One book was read, then another, and then one more before she was out. But so was Blyss. I turned out the light and laid down on the other side of my daughter. Right there, in that little bed, was the start of my family. I knew it, and all I needed to do was make Blyss my real wife.

I took Blyss’ left hand, looking at the wedding ring on her finger. It matched the one on my hand. How I wished she would stop worrying about making a real commitment. She and I were more married than most couples who were actually married. We thought about one another all the time, and now that a child had been added, it was naturally falling into place.

I looked back and forth from my daughter to the woman I loved. There was no one I loved more than the other, already. It was crazy. I’d just met Tatum, and she had taken a prime spot in my heart that’s reserved just for one’s children. It felt awesome. But I wanted more. I was greedy. I wanted Blyss to carry my name, and as soon as she was ready, I wanted her to carry my child.

But I’d have to focus my attention on one thing at a time. The marriage was first. It had to be. I didn’t like lying to my child about it, nor her grandparents. Somehow or another, I had to get Blyss to accept a real proposal. The real question was how I’d get that goal accomplished.

When I tapped Blyss on the shoulder, her eyes popped open. “Did I fall asleep,” she whispered.

“You did. I’m excellent at telling bedtime stories, it seems. I think we should go get into our bed. What do you think?”

She ran her hand over Tatum’s head, then kissed her cheek. “I think she’ll be fine. And there’s the monitor. Let’s go to bed.”

We got off the bed as if we might set off a charge of dynamite and watched Tatum’s reaction to every move we made. She never stirred a bit. We were successful on our first night. That was a major accomplishment!