C-130 rolling down the strip,

Airborne Daddy gonna take a little trip.

Stand up, hook up, shuffle to the door,

Gonna jump right out on the count of four.

Everything would be great if I’d gotten some sleep. To make matters worse, Smitty chose the wrong spot in formation—again. This time, Stone called a left face, placing her in the back corner. Again.

I watched the asses of the male troops disappear into the distance, their cadence fading. I’d dropped back to tag along with Smitty and the three other females who’d been unable to keep pace with the giant up front, a long-legged beast from hell.

Smitty came up beside me. “Your boyfriend is going to kill us.”

“He’s not my boyfriend, and you’re right about killing us. We need to do something about him.”

“Sure. Any ideas?” Smitty gulped for air, walking. Clearly winded from the first two torturous miles.

“We each need to pick a corner of the formation. There’s nothing he can do about it then.”

“I wouldn’t count on it. He’s the devil’s minion.” And to drive Smitty’s point home, Nolan turned the formation around, heading back for us.

“Oh shit. Here they come.” When the unit returned for stragglers, it didn’t help you make any friends. Before, they’d been in the homestretch, almost done. Now, we had a lynch mob headed straight for us, and they’d keep turning around to pick us up until we either didn’t fall out anymore, or we made it back to the barracks. It wouldn’t make them any happier to have women in their ranks.

If my chute don’t open wide,

I’ll make a hole in the countryside.

If my reserve fails me, too,

Look out, ground, I’m a coming through.

Funny thing they were singing about death.

“Why don’t you negotiate a little before you fuck him tonight.”

“God, Smitt. Would you lay off?”

She lifted her chin as Nolan came up alongside us, jogging in place. “Ladies.”

“Sergeant Stone.”

“Fall in. We have training to do. For every minute of my time you waste, I’m going to cut into your downtime an hour.”

“Seems like you do that a lot already,” Smitt said as she charged forward to fall into the ranks. Her comment was way out of line, but it also seemed to be a challenge to see if he’d do anything about it. He couldn’t miss the hidden message. From the snarl on his face, he hadn’t. I opened my mouth and shut it.

Stone narrowed his eyes on her and addressed me. “Move it, trainee, before I put a boot in your ass.”

I scrambled to get into the formation, feeling his eyes on my back as I went. Somebody would pay for Smitt’s cheek, later. I could almost guarantee it would be me.

Annie Oakley joined the Ar—my to travel to foreign lands.

Uncle Sam dressed her in camo and put a weapon in her hands.

I ground my teeth. I felt several eyes on me but called the cadence back. Every step, every word. I had no choice.

Annie, Annie the Army’s got no guns,

Annie, Annie your weapon’s for killing, not for fun.

Bastard.

 

***

 

“You took a big chance out there, Smitt.” I peeled my socks off and went for my shirt. “He could have buried you for your comment. You’re lucky nobody heard you.”

“He doesn’t want to get caught any more than you do.”

“That’s a dangerous chance to take. Do you really think he likes being backed into a corner?”

“He’s the one who backed in.”

“I don’t think you should screw with him.”

Smitty snorted. “I’m not the one screwing him.”

I turned away and headed for the shower, ignoring her. I had no inclination to get into it with her again. I didn’t owe her an explanation. My butt sat on the line, not hers. No way could the Army hold her, or any of the females in the unit, accountable for my actions. But no matter how I tried to reason, they would, and I knew it. My example could make or bury this program. As far as Uncle Sam was concerned, we were lab rats.

This relationship needed to stop. It would. Today.

“I’m done with him, Smitt. After his shit today. I worked too damn hard to get here, without him tearing me down the way he did.”

She turned to me, her eyes sharp, unforgiving. “Excuse me if I don’t believe you.”

“I’m sorry, Smitt.”

“Don’t give me those puppy-dog eyes. They’re not going to work.”

Yes, they were. She tried to hide a smile.

“Okay, Davis, but you better not go back on this.”

I crossed my finger over my heart. “Stick a needle in my eye.”

“God, that’s gross.” She closed her eyes and let the shower pelt her face.

I laughed. Yeah, it was. “Whoever came up with the saying, anyway?”

Smitty shrugged. “Better than hope to die.”

“Yeah, it is.”

Smitty turned to me and smiled, frost on her lips and eyes like jagged glass. Shivers wiggled down my spine. I stepped back, needing space, air to breathe. I’d never in my life seen such hostility. Not even from an enemy, especially from a friend. Cold, calculating hate. I blinked and her expression changed. There one second—in a nano-second, gone. Smitty’s face warmed, but I’d already seen it.

“Come on, Davis. They’re going to complain to the first sergeant if we tie up these showers again.” She laughed. “I can only imagine what they’re saying about us.”

I nodded, washing up as fast as I could. A cold lump sat in the back of my throat. For the first time in five years, I didn’t trust Smitt. Something felt wrong. If I broke my promise, would she rat me out? No. What I’d seen seemed darker, and it scared the shit out of me. For a second, I swore I stared into the eyes of a killer.

 

***

 

Another full day in the classroom. I didn’t see Nolan once to thank him for the clever entertainment he’d provided for the unit at physical training that morning, nor did I see him late in the evening. He remained elusive as a shadow at high noon.

Perhaps he’d changed his mind about us and decided I wasn’t worth it. Perhaps I’d been used. The longer he remained out of sight, the more I wondered if he had.

The next morning, a different instructor ran formation. Nolan wasn’t anywhere to be seen. I kept my mouth shut, knowing I’d draw unwanted attention to myself if I asked. Inside, I went through a barrage of feelings. Anger, regret, anger, sadness, anger, rage…. Yeah, by the end of PT, I’d gone from confused to downright pissed and running on a full dose of a Hell-hath-no-fury adrenaline rush.

Then I crashed. Come chow, I had all the energy of Raggedy Ann. I stared at the scrambled eggs and soggy toast, and it took all my will not to get sick. My guts had twisted into knots, and the more I thought about Nolan, the sicker I felt. Had he told the others about what we’d done? Shared the details? All of them?

I’d been a fool. I should have listened to Smitty.

The day continued on, only getting worse, and by final formation, Nolan had morphed into a monster. I wanted to scream at him, call him every nasty name in the book. I should have known better. I did know better. Every look anyone gave me fell suspect. What were they thinking? Did they know? Once dismissed, I ran from formation for the safety of my room.

As I hit the top of the stairs and came around the corner, I screeched to a stop, leaving skid marks across the hall. My heart thumped in my throat.

Leaning against the wall, next to my door—Nolan. He’d already changed into jeans and a T-shirt. I glanced down to his hand where he held a single rose. He lifted it. I shook my head and backed up, turning to run. I took the stairs, two steps at a time, bolting from the building, across the lot and toward…. What did I run from? I slept in the room, not him. He was the one who should leave.

I started back to the barracks and up the stairs. The rose lay on the floor in front of my door, Nolan had gone.

I picked it up, made my way outside, and walked around the building in the dark, searching the shadows. Again, he couldn’t be found. Did he think I’d accept this lame apology for making a fool of me at PT? I didn’t want it, didn’t need it.

“Bastard.” I tossed the rose onto the lawn and had turned to go into the building when I heard a scream, a loud thump, and the sound of a vehicle speeding away. I scanned the area from where the disturbance came and saw what appeared to be a body on the blacktop two barracks over.

I ran for the street, and the closer I drew, the more horrified I became. As the person lying on the road came into focus, I realized I knew the victim. Smitty. She lay completely still, her leg bent toward her head, at about mid-thigh, and blood wept from contusions on her arms and head.

“Oh god.” I rushed to her side. “Smitt.”

She didn’t respond. I pressed my head against her chest. She had a heartbeat, and her lungs drew air. I almost sighed in relief then realized it meant nothing. “Smitt. You okay? Smitt, wake up.” A groan.

“Help,” I screamed. “Somebody.” The CQ came out of the building housing the arms room and rushed to my side. “Stay here. I’ll call for an ambulance.”

Within minutes, flashing red lights and a wailing alarm approached.

Smitty opened her eyes and stared into my face. “Davis,” she whispered.

“Yeah, I’m here, Smitt. You’re going to be okay.”

“Did I stop it?”

“Stop what?”

“The tank that hit me.”

“You’re not funny.”

“Tell me something I don’t know.” She drew in a staggered breath. “Sucks to be you. You’ve got a twenty-six-mile road march tomorrow.”

I shook my head. I could tell she used the jokes to get her mind off the break. The fracture had to hurt. “Hang on. They’re right here.” I watched the ambulance pull up and the medics jump out.

Smitty nodded.

“We’ll take it from here.” The medics motioned for me to get back. An MP walked up, camera in hand.

“Did you see what happened?”

“No.” I’d only heard it. I pointed at the pavement. “I did notice there are no skid marks. Whoever they are, they didn’t hit the brakes. Drunk, maybe? The street lights keep it pretty bright here. It would have been hard to miss her crossing the street.”

“You talk like you’ve done this before.”

“I’m an MP, or I used to be. I’ve seen my share of accidents.”

“Then you know I’m going to need you to hang around and give me a written statement. Did the victim see anything?”

“I’m not sure. She didn’t say.” I eyed Smitty. She hadn’t lost consciousness again, a good sign.

One of the medics walked up to us. “She didn’t get a description of the vehicle or plate number. Just said she heard an engine rev, and the next thing she knew, she flew through the air and hit the pavement hard enough she blacked out. She’s lucky to be alive.”

“Is she going to be okay?” I asked.

“Unfortunately, unless you’re family, I can’t release any information. You can call the hospital in Watertown later and see if they’ll give you any information, but it’s doubtful.”

I nodded. I knew the policy and procedure. She’d seemed coherent when I’d spoken with her. Chances were good she’d be okay. Well, if I excluded her mangled leg. I’d ask the CQ later to see if they heard anything. Sometimes, you just needed to know the right person. Charge of quarters would get the accident report and status of the injured soldier. If I could be persuasive enough, I might be able to get information.

Where the hell had Nolan gone, and when I needed a strong shoulder? I didn’t know him well, but he was the only person other than Smitty I did on this post.