CHAPTER FIFTEEN
After a while, they made love again.
This time the urgency was less intense, even though the pleasures she felt were just as powerful as the first time. There was less of a hurry for either of them this time. They both seemed content to explore each other, to find out more about one another.
But the ecstasy was undiminished.
Eva felt as if she'd entered a new world. She'd never known pleasure like that could exist.
They lay in each others arms, and Eva was sure hours must have passed. Occasionally she drifted briefly off to sleep, her arms wrapped around Riaz, his around her. For his part, he seemed intent on keeping awake, his alertness keen and sharp.
She was sure Riaz didn't fall asleep in the hours after their love-making. Instead he seemed filled with energy, eager to make the most of every moment.
She could sense how much this had meant to him. His eyes were bright and he couldn't stop looking at her, as if he wanted to drain dry every moment they had together.
Was he already thinking about what would happen next? She couldn't help wondering about where all this would lead.
Eva tried not to think that this had all been some awful mistake. That she'd simply given in to Riaz's obvious attraction, his amazing sensuality, his power and persuasive authority.
What was going to happen after this? She pushed the answer to that question firmly away as she lay next to him.
She guessed it was the middle of the afternoon. She lay in Riaz's arms, her mind drifting luxuriously and lazily. All her muscles were soft as she snuggled against his warm body. She'd never felt such contentment.
Riaz hadn't left her for a moment since they'd come to the tent. Since they'd shared that incredible experience together.
Hours of ecstasy. Sensations she could hardly imagine. No man had ever made her feel the way Riaz had made her feel.
He'd been insatiable. He was a skilled lover, someone who knew just how to make a woman feel indescribable pleasure. He'd made her feel as if she was the complete center of his world, the entire focus of his being.
How was that possible? They'd only known each other a short time. But, even though their time together had been brief, there had been an intensity about their encounter which had thrown her totally off balance.
Eva thought about how close they'd actually come to each other. The ultimate closeness.
There had been a primal ferocity about some of his love-making. Every idle fantasy, every ounce of curiosity about him that she'd entertained during her moments alone, had proven to be completely true.
Riaz was every inch a sheikh, a man capable of claiming a woman in a primitive way. A man capable of making a woman feel like the most special person in the world.
Eva smiled as she played with that thought.
Riaz had made her feel like that. Her. Eva Braddon, who, until now, had considered herself beyond things like that.
Untouchable. Keeping men at a distance.
But, not any longer, it seemed. Riaz had broken down her defenses. Every last one of them.
It had been an incredible few hours and she felt utterly spent, drained of every last ounce of energy. But, at the same time, she felt more wonderful than she'd ever felt.
So why did that trouble her so much? Unease tugged at her. Had she forgotten how to simply enjoy herself, take whatever life offered up to her, without thinking too much about the consequences?
And what were the consequences of this going to be?
She wasn't completely sure. Right now, all that mattered was resting in Riaz's arms, running over in her mind the memories of what had happened during the last few hours. She still felt the remnants of those pleasures in every one of her nerves, in every one of her muscles.
If someone had told her that all of this would happen when she came to the desert days before, she would have called them crazy.
But it had happened. She was here, in the sheikh's arms, feeling the strength of his embrace, the heat of his body, inhaling his raw masculine scent. She felt delirious, as if every rational thought had left her mind.
Riaz had that effect on her. He'd had that effect on Eva even in the first moments of their encounter back at the fort. She hadn't wanted to admit it to herself, but when she'd seen him for the first time, she'd felt something shift inside her, an instant attraction. No man had ever affected Eva the way Riaz had done. Certainly, never so quickly.
Was this what people talked about when they described instant attraction?
Something fated? Something destined?
Eva felt a brief surge of unease at that thought. She'd always prided herself on her sense of self-control in every part of her life. Eva had always striven hard to master every aspect of her life. And that had included relationships.
Especially relationships.
But now this had happened.
Somehow, Riaz had overwhelmed all that with the sheer power of his presence.
What had he really done to her, apart from making love to her in the most astonishing way imaginable?
Had he sought to master Eva in some fundamental way?
And succeeded?
Out here, in this wild place, she was sure that anything could happen. Even that. All the rules she'd followed during her life had been swept away in one glorious and bewildering encounter with the most amazing man she'd ever met.
All her thinking had made her feel more awake, more alert to him and the passing of time. She wondered if the camp was still empty. Maybe the men would be returning soon.
She sat up and moved to the end of the low bed. Even with her back to him, Eva was aware Riaz was watching her as she dressed. He obviously enjoyed that simple act of taking in the sight of her putting on her clothes. Almost as much, it seemed, as he'd enjoyed seeing them being taken off a few hours before.
"Going somewhere?" he asked.
Eva turned to him. He was lying back, completely naked. Momentarily she was shocked by the casual way he lounged there, his amazing physique on full display.
He seemed to notice the slight change in her expression, because she saw a satisfied smile curl at the corner of his mouth.
Dragging her sense back into one piece, she smiled at him. "Thought I'd get some fresh air."
He slid forward on the bed and started kissing her at the back her neck, his hand caressing her shoulder. "Wouldn't you prefer to stay here?" he asked.
Eva felt sensation being triggered, sensed something familiar awakening within her. But she drew in a deep breath and stood.
When she turned and looked down at him, she saw a hint of disappointment in his eyes.
"I'm going outside."
She went into the main part of the tent and pushed her feet into her boots. He appeared from the alcove, dressed again in a white robe, but still barefoot.
The change in his appearance was startling for a moment. He had regained the same visible sense of pride she'd become so familiar these past few days. He carried himself erect, a slightly defiant turn in his bearing.
"I take it you're coming with me," she observed.
"Of course," he replied. He seemed puzzled by her need to get out of the tent. But, right now, she felt the warm air as particularly stifling. Even when she sucked in a deep breath, her lungs felt tight.
Had those thoughts back there, on the bed, made her feel this claustrophobia? Because that was what she was feeling, right now. Confined.
She needed to get out into the open. Needed to see the clear blue sky. Needed to try and make sense of what had just happened. What was going to happen.
Eva strode to the tent opening and stepped outside. She heard him following her.
She took a few steps and halted, gazing up at the sky. The sun was past its peak and heading toward the western horizon. She guessed there was at least a few hours until sundown. She dragged in a breath, filling her lungs. At least there was oxygen out here, she told herself.
Riaz came and stood at her side. She didn't look at him, and he didn't say anything to her, as if sensing the tension she was feeling. Because she was feeling tense, wasn't she? All those thoughts had merely dragged up some serious doubts from somewhere deep within her.
"Is everything okay?" he asked.
Eva avoided looking at him. She didn't want him to see the expression on her face. Not right now. Not until she'd had a chance to think this over.
Eva wrapped her arms around herself and walked a few paces. There were still no men around. Riaz had obviously given clear instructions that the camp remain empty for much of the afternoon.
Had he planned all of this? Had she merely fallen for some kind of elaborate seduction?
She heard Riaz come up alongside her. She was sure he was being affected by her silence, by her reluctance to respond to him. She thought about the contrast between that and how she'd felt a short time ago.
Unease twisted in her middle, and she knew these feelings weren't going to go away. Not until she'd said something to Riaz. Not until she'd found out just what were his intentions.
Eva turned to him. "What are we going to do?" she asked bluntly.
His brows furrowed. He hesitated before responding, clearly taken aback by the abruptness of her question.
"About what?" he asked.
It was Eva's turn to frown. "You know what I mean, Riaz." She glanced toward the tent. "I'm talking about back there."
Riaz nodded. He reached out and took her elbow turning her to face him. "What do you want me to say?"
Eva squinted at him. "I don't want you to say anything you don't mean," she stated firmly.
Riaz's eyes narrowed, understanding creeping into his gaze. "I think I made my feelings quite clear, in there," he head gesturing toward the tent.
"Feelings?" she snapped. "Who's talking about feelings?"
Riaz peered at Eva. "Isn't that what all this is about? How I feel about you?"
Eva snorted. "You don't know anything about me, Riaz," she blurted out. She knew that wasn't quite true, even as she said the words. Of course, he'd stripped away some of her defenses. He'd seen a side of her no man had ever witnessed.
"I admit I don't know all the details about your life," Riaz replied. "But I know one thing." He gazed into her eyes. "You are the most amazing woman I've ever met. In every possible way."
Eva felt her mouth open, and for a few moments she didn't know how to respond to those words. Did he really mean that?
Surely he was teasing her again. She searched his eyes for some hint of insincerity, that he wasn't telling her the truth. But she only saw the opposite.
Complete sincerity.
She turned away, but he moved so that he was still facing her. "I do not say that lightly, Eva. I know this must seem completely inexplicable to you." He ran a hand through his dark hair and frowned. "I've been struggling to come to terms with how you affect me ever since we met."
"But, this can't be, Riaz," she declared. "You know that what you're saying doesn't make sense. We've only known each other a brief time."
Riaz drew in a deep breath and nodded. "I know. The only way I can explain this is by thinking of it as some kind of fate. A kind of destiny we share."
Eva stared at him. "Destiny? How can that be?"
"How else can you explain the attraction we feel for one another? How else can you explain what happened back there?"
Words came to Eva, words she was sure would shock him, perhaps offend him. But she held them back.
Of course what had happened between them could be explained as mere lust, mere infatuation. Something that would pass as quickly as it had appeared.
But even as she thought that, she knew it wasn't true. She knew there was something else between them, something that had brought them together. Something which was binding them close.
Could he be right?
Destiny?
Fate?
As it had done on the bed, that thought made her feel a sudden panic.
Eva was aware he was watching her, waiting for her reply. But what was she supposed to say?
Eva shook her head. "I don't know what to think, Riaz, What I can say?"
Riaz took her arms, holding them gently. His gaze was intent, filled with purpose. "Say what is in your heart, Eva. What you said to me back there."
That took her by surprise. Of course she'd whispered words to him during their love-making. Words she'd meant in the moment.
But, out here, in the broad light of day, those words seemed as if they'd been uttered in a dream. And like the words of a dream they had no basis in reality. They couldn't be true, could they?
And what about what he'd murmured to Eva. She thought about the way he'd called her "habibti".
His beloved.
She was well aware of the significance of that word. In his own culture it was the word used to indicate commitment, a declaration of true affection.
Panic welled up inside her again, uncontrollable and insistent this time.
"You talk about saying what's in my heart, Riaz. What about yours?"
Riaz's brows furrowed. "But you already know that, Eva," he stated, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
Eva peered at him. "But, that's the thing, Riaz. I don't. And even if I did, how can I believe you?" She groaned and ran her gaze around the camp. "This is your world. Not mine. I'm just an intruder here."
Riaz shook his head. "You're not intruding, Eva. Far from it." He squeezed her arm gently. "I've seen how you've been watching everything that goes on here." He leaned closer, his gaze penetrating and resolute. "I've seen how you look at me."
Eva froze, gazing into his eyes, unable to shift her head. "I'm a journalist, Riaz. Have you forgotten that?"
Riaz shook his head and grinned. "The way you look at me has nothing to do with being a mere observer, Eva. I know that." He peered at her, his expression intense. "And I believe you know that, too."
Eva gazed at him, unsure how to respond for a few moments. How could he say that? Was he more perceptive than she'd given him credit for? Or was it that her own judgment had been so clouded by being in such close proximity to him?
"I think you're seeing things that aren't there, Riaz," she announced defensively.
He didn't react with outrage or indignation to her claim. Instead, he merely shook his head and she could the absolute conviction on his features.
There would be no shaking his opinion. She could see that. He'd made his mind up about her, and nothing she could say would change what he believed.
"In any case, I can't stay here much longer," she said moving away from him, forcing him to release his soft grip on her arms.
When she looked at him she saw a sudden change in his expression. She had gotten through to him with that last statement. She could see that.
"What are you talking about?" he asked sharply.
Eva glanced up at the sun, still high in the sky. "I think if I head off now, I should be able to make it to where I left my car."
Riaz's features twisted in disbelief. "Leave?"
Eva nodded. "I figure as long as I head south-west, I should reach the road before sundown. From there it'll be easy to get to the village."
"You are joking, aren't you," he stated.
He moved toward her, but she dug her heels into the sand and stared at him defiantly. "I'm not joking. I've covered distances like that before."
"But, it isn't safe," he snapped.
Eva tilted her head. "I can look after myself, Riaz. Have you forgotten that already?"
Riaz frowned. "You weren't doing much a job of that when I rescued you."
Eva glared at him. "What do you want me to say? That I'm eternally in your gratitude?"
"No. But you must agree this is a foolish thing to do," Riaz replied shaking his head.
Indignation flared in Eva and she advanced toward him. "I'm no fool, Riaz." Her breathing was quick now as she felt her temper sharpen. "Except maybe when it come to falling for a man who thinks all of this is some kind of perfect life. When its really just an escape from the real world."
As she said the words, she immediately regretted uttering them. She saw the visible shock on his features. He gazed at her disbelievingly. She saw him measuring his response, trying to find the words to respond to her criticism of his chosen life.
"Do you mean that, Eva?" he asked, his voice incredulous.
The sense of regret hardened in her. She felt it like a lump in her chest. "That all of this is some kind of illusion?" Eva stared at him defiantly. "Yes. I do."
Riaz shook his head. "That's not what I was talking about. I know you've yet to be convinced of this way of life."
Eva felt puzzled by that response. Why wasn't he offended as she'd expected him to be. Instead, he seemed determined to clarify something else about what she'd said.
"I'm referring to the other thing you just said," Riaz continued.
He moved closer to her and raised one brow. He examined her closely and then spoke: "I'm talking about what you just admitted."
"What?"
The hint of a smile creased the corner of his mouth. There was that look of victory, she told herself. He continued: "You just admitted that you've fallen for me, as you so quaintly put it," he said.
His smile broadened and she leaned her head away from him.
He was right. She had said that. How had that slipped out? Did she even mean it? Sure, she'd debated with herself back there in the tent. But, she wasn't seriously admitting that there could ever be anything between them both, was she?
Even as that thought hovered in her mind, even as she weighed up her response, she knew the answer to that question. And the answer merely triggered another wave of panic. This time the panic was mingled with a sudden impulse. One that she knew was going to be impossible to resist.
"Am I right?" Riaz said, pressing for an answer.
Eva drew in a deep breath, feeling her jaw tighten, sensing the pressure building inside her.
She took a few steps away from Riaz, but he came to her, wrapping his fingers around her arm, stopping her from getting away from him.
And that was what she wanted right now, wasn't it? To get away from him. To get as far away from this place as she could.
Wasn't that what she wanted?
Certainty mingled with doubt, and she felt a terrible sensation sweep over her. This wasn't how it was supposed to be, she told herself. He'd done everything in his power to win her over, to show her just how much she meant to him. And now all she could do was think how she could get away from him.
Did he deserve that?
"Please, Riaz," she pleaded softly. "This isn't easy for me."
"Then stay, habibti," he murmured. She felt him begin to draw her nearer to him, but she straightened, stiffening her body, making it clear to him she didn't want that. Because she knew that if she gave in to her treacherous thoughts, she might never leave this place. And then what?
Eva shook her head sharply. "No. I'm going."
She pulled herself free of his grasp.
Riaz sighed heavily and looked downward, deliberating for a few long moments. Then he gazed urgently into her eyes. "If you are determined to go, at least allow me to accompany you."
She could see the hurt in his eyes, the sudden paleness of his features. Regret tugged again at her like an insistent force. "I can't, Riaz. I need to do this on my own," she replied shaking her head.
Eva wanted to go to him, touch his cheek, try to make him understand, but she knew that if she did that everything would unravel. She'd never make it out of here.
Eva glanced across toward where she saw a few horses inside the makeshift roped-off area. "Can I take one of those horses?" she asked.
Riaz glanced across at the animals and nodded. He looked crestfallen. "If that is what you want. I'll prepare one for you."
"Thank you, Riaz," she said quietly.
And then she started back toward the tent. The place where everything had changed.