Chapter 40
Memories of happier times played through J.T.’s mind as he stood in front of Cynthia’s Upper East Side residence in Manhattan. Coming home after late nights at the opera or ballet. Walks to Central Park on a fall day. Private breakfasts on the terrace out back in the spring. Any happiness associated with those memories was gone after everything she’d done.
Trevor had learned Cynthia had left Dare Valley and returned to her main residence. Whether it was permanent or temporary in her mind, J.T. didn’t know. Today he planned to make it permanent.
“We’ll wait in the car,” Trev said, punching him softly in the shoulder.
“You’ll do fine,” his aunt said from her seat inside the limo. “Take as long as you need. Trevor here and I can play hearts.”
“She’s a terror with cards,” Trev said with a sigh, but he pulled out the deck from his pocket.
Even though his brother and Aunt Clara sparred nonstop, they seemed to like each other. Of course, their aunt had tested that theory when she’d insisted they stop in Paris on the way home so she could buy a few things. Thank God she was a decisive shopper. He and Trevor had feared they would be delayed a week.
The car door closed behind him. J.T. walked forward, feeling his phone as a burning presence in his pocket. When he rang the bell, the door opened almost immediately. Cynthia’s doorman stared at him in shock.
“Mr. Merriam,” he said, his tone stiff.
“Donald,” he replied. “I’m here to see Cynthia.”
“Of course, sir,” the man said, allowing him inside.
The black and white squares in the foyer and the sweeping staircase were decorated in Art Deco style. Not a speck of dust or clutter was allowed, and the silver was polished weekly. He’d hated this place, he realized. There wasn’t a single comfortable piece of furniture to sit on. Caroline, he realized, didn’t mind a little mess. They had the same idea of what home looked like, and they could make a life on that.
“Darling!”
He looked up to see Cynthia rushing down the stairs in a flurry of New York black, her normal comportment gone.
“I knew you’d come back,” she said, rushing forward and throwing her arms around him before he could blink. “Those women were horrible to say you’d disappeared on me.”
He pried her arms off him as gently as he could. “I did disappear, Cynthia. Or I’d planned to. Can we talk in your study? I have something private to discuss.”
She scanned his face. “You look terrible. Julian, you take things too hard.”
During the course of their marriage, she’d told him that often. When three people had died in a small gas explosion while repairing a Merriam pipeline, he’d been devastated. Her response had been cold and rational—they’d accepted the risk when they accepted the job, and things like that happened. He’d visited the families without her. She’d claimed she couldn’t clear her schedule. Deep down he’d known the truth: she hadn’t wanted to.
“The study,” he said, waiting for her to precede him.
Instead, she linked arms with him and started walking. “When I couldn’t reach you, I was frantic. Don’t you ever do that again.”
Inside the study, he closed the door behind him, sick at heart. Aunt Clara was right. In her own way, she still loved him. He figured it was time for them to be honest with each other. For the emotions they’d been repressing to finally come out.
“You’re speaking to me like a concerned wife,” he said, unbuttoning his jacket and sitting in the chair across from the settee she’d chosen.
She fussed with the edge of her Chanel suit. “Can’t I be concerned?”
Was she really going to beat around the bush? “Cynthia, are you really hoping this game you’re playing with me will lead to some form of a reconciliation?”
Her gaze flickered up, and he caught the stain of red flushing her cheekbones. “I’ve given this a lot of thought, darling. Perhaps all this animosity between us is the other side of a love-hate relationship? There can’t be this much emotion without it meaning something.”
Suddenly he knew the truth. “Given your parents’ relationship and how you were raised, I can see you might think that. Cynthia, there is a lot of emotion. I’ll grant you that, but this push-pull of power…this constant quest for revenge… It’s not love.”
She leaned back in the settee to better display her assets, he knew. “Perhaps it’s not, but it’s born out of love. We did love each other, Julian.”
He nodded. “Yes, but that time is past. Cynthia, it’s time for both of us to start over and find new directions apart from each other.” He’d used similar words when he’d told her he wanted a divorce.
She sat up and stared at him, her eyes hard now. “You mean my ship should go one way and yours another?”
“Yes.”
“No,” she said simply, standing up. “That’s not how it’s going to be.”
He rose as well, the familiar tension filling his body. “You’ve made my life hell for over three years now. It stops today. Let me tell you in no uncertain terms. I don’t love you anymore. I’ll never come back to you. I don’t mean to hurt you saying so, but it’s the God’s honest truth.”
Her chuckle was soft and ever so menacing. “But you have hurt me, darling, which is why I decide when it stops. Not you.”
Even though he’d expected her response, it still saddened him. “You’re wrong there.”
Fishing out his phone, he brought up the video and hit play. He held it up for her to see, but he watched her. Emotion played across her face. Shock. Fear. And then ice-cold anger, a look he knew well.
She didn’t say anything until the video ended, and neither did he. Pocketing it, he simply sat down again. She sat back down on the settee, her posture picture-perfect.
“Well, well, well, your elderly aunt and your freshly fired girlfriend have teeth,” she said in her bored voice. “I expect Trevor thought up this plan.”
“It doesn’t matter who it was,” he said. “You were indiscreet.”
She edged closer to his chair. “I was upset over you disappearing! I didn’t know what I was saying.”
“Bullshit! You knew exactly what you were saying. Cynthia, for three years, I’ve been trying to get you to call an end to this revenge quest you’re hell-bent on. This video gives me a certain leverage, and unfortunately, I don’t see any other choice than to use it.”
Her mouth parted. “You wouldn’t. One of the things I’ve always loved about you, Julian, is your sense of manners and fair play. Besides, I know your thoughts on a lot of things that wouldn’t be favorable for you—”
“But I have you on record,” he interrupted. “You can’t say the same. Once this video goes public, your reputation will be in the gutter.”
Should Trevor discover collusion at Carlyle, well, they’d pursue that too. It went beyond Cynthia, and he’d decided to stop being bullied. He’d leave it up to Connor and Flynn if they wanted to cook up some punishment for Newhouse Senior and his crony.
“No one will believe a word you say after seeing this,” he said, driving it home. “They certainly won’t want you over for dinner or hosting a charity function. And you know it.”
Her hand curled around the edge of his chair like she was a woman desperately trying to hang on in an untenable situation.
“I only want to be free of you,” he said, “so I’m here to make you a deal.”
She flounced back on the couch like an angry teenager. “Blackmail? Oh, how Borgia of you, darling. You lived in Rome way too long.”
Was it Borgia of him? Right now, he didn’t care. “I won’t publish this video if you’ll swear to leave me in peace. Forever.”
“You won’t ruin me,” she cried, pressing her fists into the settee. “It’s not in your character.”
His mouth lifted as he said, “Disappearing from everyone and everything I love wasn’t in my character either, and yet, only a few days ago, that’s what I did. Cynthia, this…horrible game has changed us both.”
“You broke my heart when you left me,” she spat.
He believed her. “And I’ve apologized. I’ve asked you to forgive me more than once. I hope in time we can forgive each other. But I promise you that I will make this video public if you so much as contact me or anyone I care about ever again.”
She made an anguished sound as he stood.
“Oh, and my brother plans to go after Carlyle and potentially your father for their involvement in your little games,” he said. “I would advise you to leave them to their own devices. They’re big boys, after all.”
He crossed to the door and turned around to face her. In that moment, sadness rolled through him. Yes, he’d once loved her and she him, but that felt like a lifetime ago. After today, he planned to never see her again, and somehow that filled him with peace, a peace he’d longed for. “Goodbye, Cynthia.”
She stood up slowly. “Julian, don’t go.”
He opened the door and walked to the foyer. Donald was there to see him out. When he was outside, he took a couple of cleansing breaths. The lights from Manhattan prevented him from seeing the stars. He thought of Dare Valley and how much he missed the endless sky.
The door to the limo opened.
Aunt Clara stuck her head out. “Is your work here done?”
He nodded, shaking off the last of the sickness in his heart. Cynthia had made her bed with the choices she’d made. That chapter was officially closed finally, and he could feel excitement gathering in his heart. He’d lived with fear for so long, he barely remembered the sensation of living without it. The time had come to savor life again, to have and enjoy everything he wanted.
Trev stepped out. “You ready to blow this joint?”
He put his arm around his brother, glad for his constant rock-solid presence.
“Yes, let’s go home.”
He had a wonderful woman and a new life to claim.