“Tashechka.”
The hand on my arm is persistent, and I’m confused when I wake to find it’s Nonna shaking me. I sit upright in bed, noting from the darkness outside that it’s not yet dawn.
“What’s wrong?” I ask.
“Nikolai has asked for you.”
“He’s here?” I rub the sleep from my eyes and move the blanket aside.
Nonna doesn’t answer, but she guides me to the closet and instructs me to dress.
“Where is he?”
“He’s waiting for you, but you must hurry.”
I don’t understand what’s happening, but I dress in the clothes Nonna hands me and when I’m finished, she leads me down the stairs and nods to the guard.
“She’s ready.”
He opens the front door and gestures me outside, but I hesitate. I’m supposed to leave today. Gianni will be waiting for me, and I won’t be able to meet him because I don’t know where we’re going.
“Where is Nikolai?” I repeat.
The guard looks at Nonna, and she shrugs as if to give permission. When I look back, he’s moved closer. I try to step away from him, but he reaches out and grabs my arm.
“Nonna?” I look at her for reassurance, but there isn’t one to be found.
“It’s time for you to go,” she says. “Don’t make it harder on yourself. Nikolai wants you gone.”
“No.” I throw an elbow and the guard grunts, but his grip tightens. The door is open, and if I can just get past it, I’ll be okay. I can run and hide until daylight when Gianni comes to save me.
It’s the only hope I can grasp onto, and it’s snatched away before it has a chance to grow roots. The guard knocks me onto the floor and pins me down with his knee, forcing my wrists together behind my back. He gestures to Nonna, and she produces some rope and tape that he uses to secure me before propping me upright.
“Why are you doing this, Nonna?”
This woman has taken care of me. She has provided my meals and made my bed and showed her concern when I wasn’t eating. I can’t make sense of it.
“It’s not me,” she says. “It’s Nikolai. I only do what he tells me. He does not want you anymore. If you accept this, it will be easier. Don’t fight.”
I don’t want to believe her, but how can I not? Nikolai has gone and left me to my fate. The fate he warned me would inevitably end in tragedy. And I know before the guard even places the tape over my mouth that this is it. They are taking me to my death.
Gravel crunches beneath the tires as the car moves away from the house. Around us, there is nothing but wilderness. Even if I did manage to get out, I doubt I could outrun the guard in my current state. But I know I can’t give up. I can’t give up hope until I’ve exhausted every option. I wiggle my arms back and forth to loosen the rope, but it makes too much noise.
“Stop,” the guard orders. “Or I will make it worse.”
I meet his eyes in the rearview mirror. He is little more than a soldier, and his rank within the Vory is insignificant. Yet this is the man who Nikolai sent to bring me to my death.
Perhaps this is why he opted not to say goodbye. There is no goodbye when it’s forever. He knew I would be gone when he returned, and he would be free to marry Ana and fulfill his duties as a loyal Vor. It’s the only solution for him because he just couldn’t let me go, thinking that I might have a life on my own without him.
A sob rips from my chest, and I continue to thrash against my restraints regardless of the guard’s threats. If I must die, then I will go out fighting.
“I told you to stop,” the guard bellows.
He pulls over, and I slide to the other side of the car, curling my knees into my chest. I’m prepared to kick him with as much force as I can manage when he wrenches the door open and comes at me. My legs heave toward him, clashing into solid flesh. It’s a blind effort, since my hair is a mess, and I can’t see past it. My ears, however, are still intact.
An explosive sound vibrates through my skull, and something wet sprays across my skin. I jerk backward, but there’s nowhere to go, and now the weight on my legs is too heavy to move.
“Tanaka.”
A hushed voice breaks through the chaos, and I shake my head, trying desperately to see through the tangle of hair.
“Gianni?”
The door opens behind me and strong arms drag me out. I’m still not sure if it’s the enemy or my savior until the knife cuts through the restraints on my wrists, freeing me.
I scrub the hair out of my face and sniffle when I see his face.
Gianni.
He came for me. He came like he said he would. And I am not going to die today.
“Quick.” He grabs me by the arm and leads me through the brush to a waiting Jeep.
Before I can even thank him, he hoists me inside and takes his place in the driver’s seat, firing up the ignition. The ride is a bumpy one, and it’s left up to me to remove the tape from my face, which is also partially tangled in my hair. It hurts, but compared to what could have happened, it’s nothing.
“How many other guards are at the house?” Gianni asks as he speeds down the dirt road and onto the highway.
“That was it. Just him.”
He nods.
“Is he dead?”
Gianni glances at me and then back to the road. “Yes.”
I take a moment to process that. “How did you know?”
“I came early,” he says. “I’ve been camping out all night, watching the house. The panic in your voice yesterday concerned me, so I didn’t think there was much time left.”
“There wasn’t.” I swallow and look out the window. “They were going to kill me. Nikolai sent me to die.”
Gianni looks at me incredulously. “Tell me you didn’t fall for him, Tanaka.”
“Of course not.”
It isn’t believable. Gianni shakes his head but makes a point not to argue about it. There are more important things to discuss, like my future.
“Where are we going?”
“That depends on you,” he answers. “Your options are limited, Tanaka.”
“I know.”
“Does that mean you’re ready?”
Reality settles over me, and it’s heavy. What he’s asking will change everything. It means letting go of my old life. Letting go of the memories of Nikolai, and any love that lives in my heart.
I close my eyes and lean back against the seat. The words don’t come easily, but they do come. “I’m ready.”