CHAPTER 10
A week ago
Bloody hell. Is this night over yet?
Drying my hands, I exit the toilet and step back out into the hall. Jamie, Ivy’s coworker, is a real corker. Nice girl, funny, kind-hearted.
And nosy at times.
When Ivy extended Jamie’s invitation to her housewarming party, I couldn’t say no. And not just because I’m a fool who will go anywhere Ivy asks me to.
But fuck, man. Did he have to be here too? Of course he did. He’s their co-worker, as well.
The hall is packed with lingering people. Some turn to smile at me as I pass. I try my best to smile back despite my wickedly dark mood. I’m being an arsehole, I know, but it can’t be helped.
Other jackasses coming onto my girl tends to put me in a twisted frame of mind.
Especially one that let her slip through his fingers. Her fucking ex Robert is everywhere. Can’t escape him.
It doesn’t matter that Ivy isn’t ready to admit what’s between us. I can’t help but see her as mine. Always will.
I find my little pain in the arse in the packed living room on the corner of the sectional couch, head thrown back in laughter.
Bugger me. With that long strawberry blond hair and those aqua eyes—and that pin up girl body—she takes the breath from me.
Every. God. Damn. Time.
Robert, the ever-present, fawning idiot at her side, is on the loveseat across from her, his face lit up with his own smile. He’s eating up her temporary focus on him.
Fucking arsehole.
Internally fuming, I rush back over, pleased to see Ivy saved my spot. I drop into it like I own the goddamn place. Then, for the millionth time in this friendship, I do what no best friend should be allowed to do. I blur the boundaries.
Easing my arm around Ivy’s shoulder, I tug her into my side. My tipsy doll giggles when she realizes it’s me. “There you are, Noah!”
My heart trips in my chest at the way she smiles up at me. It isn’t lost on me that she hasn’t pulled away. As a matter of fact, she snuggles closer, head tilted back on my shoulder, eyes sparkling up at me.
Telling me everything she herself can’t admit.
My cock hardens instantly. How many times have I denied myself those lips? Too many to count. To the point where my willpower is in shreds. Five years of being in love with this woman have taken their toll.
Most people wonder why I haven’t confessed. Why I haven’t told her.
But Ivy isn’t ready for that. She feels what I feel, I’ve seen too much evidence to doubt it, so I decided I would let her ease into it. Take her time.
Take her time. Right. It’s been five-bloody-years.
The countdown is ticking. She doesn’t know it yet, but soon I’m going to lose control. Soon, I’m throwing all caution to the wind and making this woman mine.
I cup her pretty little jaw and caress her. “How you feeling, love?”
She giggles again and snuggles closer. “I shouldn’t have drank all that champagne.”
Robert is watching us with that dark expression; same expression he always wears when I come around. When he sees how Ivy’s with me. That’s right, tosser. She’ll never be yours again because she’s already mine.
It still amazes me that I feel this way for her. When Leslie died, my ring on her finger, it felt like my world ended. Like I’d never be okay again.
Definitely didn’t think I could love again.
Then I moved to the states, met Ivy, and one look at her blew up my insides.
Seriously. She fucking blew me up. Too bad she was in a relationship with Robert at that time.
Should’ve made a move on her anyway. Now here I am, half-a-decade later, stuck in the fucking friendzone.
Not for much longer.
I run my thumb down her jaw, struck stupid by how soft her skin is. “No more drinking for you, love. Or we both know I’ll be carrying you out of here.”
Another giggle. Fuck me, my cock loves that sound. “Wouldn’t be the first time, BFF,” she says playfully.
Fucking hate when she calls me that. “You’re right. And I’ll always be there to carry you every single time.” Because I’m in love with you. I’m so fucking in love with you it’s like a sickness in me. I don’t even recognize who I am anymore.
Robert calls Ivy’s name.
I feel the ugliness of the scowl on my face.
Ivy turns to him, but she makes no move to leave my arms or ease off me. “Sorry. What were we talking about before?”
He doesn’t seem too pleased that she already forgot their conversation.
I barely check a smile in time.
Jamie appears next to me, all five-feet-six-inches of bubbly, cheerful personality, and sits on the couch next to me. Her hazel eyes take in my position with Ivy.
Taking advantage of Ivy’s distraction, she leans in to mumble to me, “You two really need to just admit reality and fuck each other’s brains out. Violently. I volunteer to sacrifice the bed in my guest bedroom for you two to break.”
Her brash, honest comment rips a laugh out of me.
Ivy immediately turns, eyes curious, and just like that, Robert is once again forgotten. Ready to take the hint now, Nancy boy?
“What’s so funny?” Ivy asks, all wide-eyed innocence.
“Nothing.” Jamie flips her light blond hair over her shoulder and leans in playfully. “Just discussing this one chick that Noah’s absolutely cray cray for.”
Fucking Jamie and her games.
Ivy’s eyes flash although she tries to hide it. It’s the same look she gets whenever Anne comes around.
And Jesus, it gets me every damn time.
Why do I still sleep around with other women knowing I’m in love with Ivy? Because it’s the only way to deal with her string of lovers without losing my mind and gutting the bastards. That’s why.
“Oh?” Ivy strives for nonchalant but she’s too sloshed to pull it off. “That wouldn’t happen to be Anne, would it?”
“Yeah. Her. That’s the one!” Jamie cries sarcastically, at the same time as I say, “She’s just a friend.”
Ivy’s eyes bounce between us.
I glare at Jamie.
Jamie smiles innocently.
“You . . . you have feelings for Anne?” My doll whispers softly.
“Absolutely not!” Several people turn to stare in my direction at my outburst, but I couldn’t give two shites about that. “Not like that anyway. She’s just a friend. I swear, love.”
She blinks those exotic, mind-fucking eyes at me. “Then who are you guys talking about?”
“No one. Jamie doesn’t know what she’s going on about.”
Jaime laughs and waves me away, talking to Ivy as if this is just typical girl-talk. “Okay, so I was lying when I said it’s Anne. This one right...” she points at me “...here swore me to secrecy. But get this, girl. Look at him.”
Ivy’s eyes cut toward me then back to Jamie.
“So you see that right there? Irresistible, right?”
My eyes lock on Ivy’s face, waiting for her response.
Cheeks pink, she mumbles, “Yeah,” but keeps her stare focused on her friend.
Jamie giggles. “Right. So this chick? She’s completely in denial. Doesn’t want to admit that she’s dying to ride this bronco until he breaks.”
Normally, I’m a hardass about anyone making Ivy uncomfortable. I step in immediately and put a stop to it. But right now, my eyes are glued to Ivy, studying every one of her micro-expressions.
She bites her lip shyly and looks away in the direction of the kitchen. “Uh huh.”
Jamie throws her hands in the air. “And I mean, come on! What living, breathing woman wouldn’t want to suck this man dry of baby juice?”
Ivy and I choke.
“Um, I need another drink.” Ivy stands.
I grab her hand before she can walk away. “Love, you’re pretty sloshed—”
She tugs her hand away. “We’ve been through this before, Noah. You’re not my dad.”
Bollocks. No. I’m not. I’m just the idiot obsessed with and out-of-control protective of you. Scowling, I clench my fists and let her leave. Thankfully, Robert disappeared at some point, because if I saw him get up and follow her, I wouldn’t be able to give Ivy the space she needs.
Still, I watch the entrance to the kitchen like a hawk, waiting for her to come back.
“Amazing.” Jamie sighs and drinks her beer. “She doesn’t even realize I’m talking about her. Can you imagine?”
I don’t move my stare, but I do shake my head. “Took it a little far, didn’t you?”
“Oh shut it. You love seeing her jealous over you.”
Damn her. I do.
When Ivy finally steps out of the kitchen, another champagne flute in hand, I see Robert step out with her. That beastly possessiveness that still confuses me floods my veins. I tense on the couch, fighting the urge to stomp toward Ivy and rip her away from that fool.
Bloody unreasonable.
“Then again, she isn’t the only one with a jealousy issue.” Smirking, Jamie raises her beer to her lips again.
“Bugger off,” I warn under my breath, hands fisting tighter.
Much to my relief, Ivy comes right back to her spot next to me. She won’t meet my eyes, but that doesn’t matter. I wrap my arm around her waist again and bring her close.
She’s talking to Robert, ignoring me. Won’t turn to me.
Whatever. She isn’t pulling away either.
And I’m holding her flush against my body.
Jamie heads over and gets us extra drinks. All around us, the crowd mingles, and I don’t miss the way people keep staring at Ivy and me. They’re always staring at us like that. Wherever we go.
Everyone can sense our chemistry. Everyone. That’s how I know that Ivy’s time for denial is running out. I’m at a breaking point and I think she is, too. Everyone can pick up on the crazy tension between us.
My doll drinks another two glasses of champagne before I put a stop to that. I know she hates it when I take control and “act like her father”, but she’s done.
An hour later, as everyone is barely starting to trickle out, Ivy’s fast asleep, head on my lap.
I play with her hair, leaning back on the couch, my other arm draped along the back. Once everyone heads out, I’ll carry Ivy to the car and take her home.
Jamie thanks another group of people before seeing them out the door. Closing it, she walks up to us, shaking her head at the sight of Ivy’s head on my lap. “You guys are ridiculous. When are you going to stop this useless denial thing?”
Exhaling slowly, I continue playing with Ivy’s hair, loving the feel of it. “I’m not the one in denial, Jamie. She is.”
Shrugging, Jamie turns away. “And at what point will you do something about?”
“Soon.” I shift off the couch and lean over to pick up Ivy. “Real soon.”