Peggy stood at the entrance to the room she shared with Sage, squinting into the darkness to find her best friend asleep, buried under a pile of wedding venue brochures. After what she’d done with Elliott, there was no way she could lie down and sleep, but there would be no Golden Girls marathon tonight. Her emotions were a pile of shredded cheese, every erogenous zone on her body singing with satisfaction, which she really didn’t want to acknowledge.
Moving as quietly as possible, Peggy slipped into the room and snagged her laptop, along with the manila folder resting on top, then ducked back out into the hallway. No sooner had she set up camp in a cross-legged position than Belmont came pacing closer from the opposite end, carrying a green-labeled soda, presumably from the vending machine. Ginger ale?
He tucked it into his jacket pocket before she could confirm, leaning against the wall across from her and watching her with all-knowing blue eyes. Maybe it was the current tangle of her senses or her lack of sleep since arriving in Cincinnati, but a thought flitted through her mind as she regarded her brother, who appeared and disappeared at will.
He’s a ghost.
As soon as the brainwave occurred, she hated it. Wished it had never passed through her mind. But it stuck anyway.
As a teenager, she could remember studying for history exams, lying on her bed with an open textbook…and searching the old grainy black-and-white wartime photographs for Belmont’s face. It made no sense then and it still didn’t. He was standing right there, solid as humanly possible. Maybe it was the way he didn’t like to be touched very often, or the way he spoke so differently and with such gravity, that made her wonder if someday, when he wasn’t looking, she would lay a hand on his back…and it would pass right through him. And she would trade knowing looks with her other siblings, as if they’d suspected all along.
Belmont’s spirit was more substantial than time.
“What are you doing out here?” Peggy asked, staring down at the floral-patterned carpet. “Standing guard over Sage?”
She could sense his abashed expression without glancing up, so his dark rumble surprised her. “Not only Sage.”
“But I wasn’t even here,” she pushed past rubbery lips.
“You’re here now.” He paused. “Or are you?”
Her laughter was short and humorless. “I was wondering the same thing about you.”
Peggy finally looked up at her brother and immediately wanted to take back her words. They’d caused the blue of his eyes to go almost black, but she didn’t think making light of what she’d said would help, either. Who was her brother really? If she hadn’t wondered the same thing thousands of times, she would accuse herself of using the mystery of Belmont to distract her from Elliott.
Elliott.
Hearing his name echo in her head was enough to make her fists clench. Goddamn him for what he’d done outside. Ruining her chance to escape. To move on without any more struggling. I need your hands and eyes. I missed them most of all.
Well the struggle might have just gotten twice as real, but so had her determination to move on. Because whatever she’d felt for Elliott the man? She was declaring it dead. At one time there’d been more than sexual dependency and her need for approval between them, not that Elliott would admit it. But he’d slowly killed the good. She’d be damned before trying to revive it, when he didn’t want it back.
I’m over you, Elliott Brooks.
Belmont sat down across from her, although he had a far more difficult time arranging his bulk into a comfortable position. Flicking a glance at Peggy, he removed the ginger ale from his pocket and set it aside carefully.
“Bel,” Peggy said on a sigh. “I shouldn’t be telling you this, but I don’t like to see you worried. Especially when I can save you from it.”
He glanced toward the hotel room door to Peggy’s left. “Hmm.”
Peggy chewed her lip a moment. “Sage just has her period, okay? So if maybe she’s acting a little different…that’s all it is. Despite what you see in tampon commercials, it doesn’t exactly make you want to rappel down the side of a mountain.”
For the space of ten breaths, his features were carved in granite. “You must think I’m foolish for not realizing that. Sage, as well.”
“No.” Peggy reached toward her brother, laying a hand on the carpet. “No one could ever think that about you. Not in a million years.”
He didn’t believe her. She could see it in the bunching of his shoulders, the way he looked down at the ginger ale, as if willing it to disappear. However, she could tell by Belmont’s relative calm that he still wasn’t aware that Sage planned to leave. Part of her was desperate to tell her brother, because he would fight like hell to change Sage’s mind. He wouldn’t rest until he reached her. But Sage’s departure wasn’t Peggy’s plan to reveal. “Are we going to lose you on this trip, too, Peggy?”
“What?” Her heart lurched. Not just at the left field quality of the question, but the reminder that Rita and Aaron were gone, their seats in the Suburban empty. “No. Why would you ask me that?”
No answer. “I don’t know how to be alone with Sage anymore. If it were to come to that.” He rubbed his thumb along the crease of his chin, then let the hand drop. “I can manage it sometimes, but others…” He avoided her eyes. “The thoughts I have about her are disrespectful.”
It hadn’t been easy for her introverted brother to make that admission out loud, and Peggy quietly cursed, wishing Aaron were there to pull everything into perspective with a wry one-liner. “You don’t have it in you to be disrespectful, Bel. What you’re feeling is healthy.” She smiled. “There’s a damn good chance she’s having those same thoughts about you.”
Horror took ownership of his expression. “No. Not Sage.” They sat in silence for a few long moments, before Belmont spoke again. “Being here is bad for you, Peggy, I can see it. I want to pack you both up and go.”
“That sounds like you want to stuff us inside your suitcase.” Love clawed at her throat. Love and dread, because he could very well be right. Little parts of her had been chipped away since arriving, only she didn’t know which ones. Or if they would fit back into place if she found them. “Don’t worry, Bel. We’ll go soon enough.”
She flattened her palms on the manila folder, before flipping it open to reveal names, phone numbers, and e-mail addresses of Elliott’s past players who were now in the NFL. Elliott’s secretary—obviously shocked by her boss’s agreement—had been very helpful that afternoon in providing contacts. And as Peggy had expected, the generosity of the alumni committee had shone bright as always, showing no hesitation in directing the funds toward the Tate family, instead of the cheerleading program.
“There’s just something I want to see done before we go,” Peggy said.
“Can I help?” He gestured to the laptop. “I’ve got one of those in my room. I’m still warming up to the Internet, but—”
“But you’ve been using it to find your father,” Peggy finished, praying he wouldn’t shut down on her. “How is it…going?”
He kept his eyes glued on her computer. “Fine. I think I’m close.”
She should have been happier, knowing his goal was within reach, but there was a selfish part of her that didn’t want some unknown person to have any part of Belmont. He was theirs. “Will you let me know when you find something?”
“Of course.” Still, he didn’t look at her, nodding once again at the laptop. “Why don’t you tell me what I can do to help?”
“You mean get us out of Cincinnati faster?”
The corner of his mouth tugged. “That was somewhere between the lines.”
Peggy breathed out a hum of relief that they were back to making eye contact, even if she could still see his secrets lurking. “I met this guy today—a football player—and there was just something good about him.” Holding the laptop and folder, she walked on her knees across the hallway, plonking down beside her brother. “He needs help.”
Belmont laid a hand on the crown of her head, banishing the remaining chill with which she’d walked back into the hotel. “This is you, Peggy,” he said. “This is what the right man will see.”
He stood to a height that towered over Peggy, retrieved his own computer from his room, and they worked in silence until the sun came up.