It should have been a good day. It was a Saturday, which meant Gage only had to work half the day and then he’d be off until Monday morning. If that wasn’t enough reason to smile, it was also a beautiful day outside—lots of sun, a nice breeze, and no humidity. The kind of perfect day that only happened a few times each summer.

Still, it wasn’t enough to make Gage happy.

Lying awake all night thinking about Newton meant that he’d barely had any sleep, and just getting through his half-shift today without finding a corner to curl up in for a nap was going to be a struggle.

Between the lack of sleep and the near-obsessive checking his phone to make sure he hadn’t accidentally missed a call from Newton, it was shaping up to be the longest half-day ever.

He’d spent way too long looking out the front window down Main Street. He couldn’t really see Newton’s studio from the gym, but just knowing Newton was down there, wondering if maybe he was looking out his own window and thinking about that kiss was enough to keep Gage’s feet glued to the floor.

If Newton was thinking about it, though, he was doing a good job of keeping it to himself. Gage hadn’t heard a peep out of him since he’d dropped Newton off the night before. And even though Gage really wanted to give him whatever time or space he needed, the fact that Gage still hadn’t talked about it with anyone was starting to make him feel like his head might explode.

Granted, it had only been less than twelve hours since their kiss, but still… having all of those emotions pent up inside made it feel like a long time.

He still didn’t want to talk about it with anyone but Newton, though. At least not at first. So hopefully Calvin wouldn’t stop in today for anything, because the temptation to spill his guts might just be too much to bear in Gage’s sleep-deprived state.

Gage’s phone chirped with an incoming text and he fumbled with his phone, nearly dropping it as he hurried to see who had messaged him.

It wasn’t Newton, though.

Just Calvin, seemingly reading Gage’s mind in that weird-but-sometimes-wonderful way of his.

Hey! Omg last night was fun! So glad you guys came by… but I think I’m gonna stay away from the wine for a few days. Wanna grab some lunch when you get off work?

Gage sighed.

He would have normally been more than happy to get lunch with Calvin on a normal Saturday. It would have been a perfect excuse to throw together a makeshift picnic and head to the park.

But that wasn’t going to be in the cards today.

Gage was too tired. Too moody. Too close to either yelling or crying in frustration, neither of which he wanted to do at all—let alone in front of Calvin.

Frowning, he tapped out a quick reply.

Sorry buddy. Can’t today. Thanks for last night, though. We’ll have to do it again sometime.

He re-read the message before sending it, making sure it sounded normal—not too sleepy, not too mopey, not too angsty.

Whatever.

It would have to be good enough for now. He had left out the important parts at least.

Because the truth was that he didn’t know if there would be a next time for the four of them to get together. He didn’t know if Newton would even want to speak to him again. Dinner and drinks and fun with friends seemed like a little too much to hope for at that particular moment.

His phone pinged again as he was putting it away, and again Gage got his hopes up as he hurried to check his messages.

Still not Newton, though.

Are you standing me up for lunch because you have other plans, perhaps? Plans with a certain cute photographer???

Gage grimaced. If only he had plans with a certain cute photographer. That would have made the day a lot brighter. It would have made the sleepless night totally worth it.

It would have given Gage a reason to look forward to getting off work besides just the opportunity to take a nap.

But no.

No plans.

He put his phone away without replying to Calvin’s text. He didn’t even know how to answer.

The cute photographer had shut him out, and Gage wasn’t sure if he’d be able to fix whatever had gone wrong the night before. He was definitely going to try, though.

The only question was whether or not Newton would be open to talking about it sometime.

For the moment, it wasn’t looking very likely.

Gage stepped outside, feeling much more exhausted than he had any right to be at one in the afternoon on a Saturday. But as he walked across the parking lot of the gym to get to his Jeep, he felt like he was literally dragging his feet.

It wasn’t just the lack of sleep, though.

The day was officially half over, and he still hadn’t heard from Newton.

Why, though?

Why the sudden cold shoulder?

Okay, so maybe the kiss had been a mistake. Gage couldn’t bring himself to believe that, but maybe Newton did. And if that was the case, Gage would respect his feelings.

He just wanted to know what was going on.

Sliding into the driver’s seat, Gage closed his eyes for a moment and just sat there, letting the afternoon sun wash over him. He needed some rest, that was for sure.

But as he started the engine and pulled out of the parking lot, he realized that sleep wasn’t going to be an option as long as he had this unresolved issue with Newton weighing on his mind.

Or, more accurately, he probably would be able to sleep, but he’d probably be dreaming of Newton. And then Newton would probably be on his mind again from the minute he woke up.

Was he really prepared to torture himself like that?

He considered his options as he slowly drove down Main Street, past the bookstore, past the two coffee shops, past the salon and the rest of the cute little shops that were bustling with activity on that beautiful Saturday afternoon.

Up ahead was Newton’s studio, and even though Gage had tried to keep from looking, he still craned his neck to see if he could catch a glimpse of the man who had been on his mind non-stop not just for the past several hours, but for the past week.

He couldn’t see any sign of the photographer, though. In fact, the whole front of the studio seemed dark inside those large floor-to-ceiling windows.

Gage should have kept going. He should have just passed the place by and let whatever was going on with Newton play out eventually on Newton’s time.

He should have gone home, taken a shower, taken a nap, and then made a more rational decision later in the day if he still hadn’t heard from Newton by then.

But he wasn’t feeling rational. He wasn’t sure if he could wait that long.

He sure as hell didn’t want to torture himself needlessly if he didn’t have to.

So instead of following through with all the things he should do, he pulled off the street and slowly drove around the back of Newton’s building and parked in front of that back staircase—the same spot he’d been parked in the last time he’d seen Newton.

Looking up at the apartment, there were still no signs of life. There was only one small window on this side of the building, and the curtains were pulled tightly shut.

Was Newton okay?

Had something happened, and that was why he hadn’t called?

Was he up there hurt, waiting for someone to come help him?

Gage didn’t want to even consider those things, but with no other information to go on, his mind jumped to all the worst conclusions as he sat alone down in the parking lot of Newton’s building.

There was no way he was just going to go home now. Fuck that. Even if he didn’t get to actually talk to Newton, even if he didn’t get the answers he was looking for, he wasn’t going anywhere until he at least made sure the man was okay.

His conscience wouldn’t allow him to ever sleep again if he drove off and found out later that Newton really had needed his help.

With that in mind, he didn’t hesitate when he pulled out his phone this time. He dialed the number to Newton’s studio first, but wasn’t at all surprised when there was no answer.

Even on the days when Newton had locked himself up in that little room in the back where he developed pictures, he had still left lights on in the front of the building. Even on those days, the sign on the door had indicated the place was at least open.

Today there were no lights on, though. The sign on the door still read Closed.

After letting the phone ring for at least a dozen times, Gage hung up and scrolled through to Newton’s personal number.

The number he’d been simultaneously avoiding yet hoping to see all afternoon.

He only paused for a minute with his thumb above the call button before he pressed it.

Newton might need me. That’s all that matters right now. Fuck waiting. Fuck pride.

He dialed the number, put the phone to his ear, held his breath, and waited as it began to ring.

And waited.

And waited.

Each ring that went unanswered made the knot that had formed in the pit of Gage’s stomach get tighter, the feeling of concern and helplessness grow heavier and more consuming.

When the call finally went to Newton’s voicemail, Gage hung up without leaving a message.

What the fuck was he supposed to do now?

Should he call the police?

Should he call Calvin?

Break the door down?

Gage took a deep breath. Whatever he ended up doing, he needed to get himself together and calm down a little first.

There was probably some reasonable explanation for why Newton hadn’t opened his studio yet today. There was probably an equally good reason for why he hadn’t called or sent a text, as well as for why he wasn’t answering the phone now.

It was probably all just some sort of coincidence. A strange, scary, unnerving coincidence.

There was no doubt a great explanation for all of it but fuck if Gage could figure out what it might be.

One thing was certain, though. He couldn’t stand not knowing.

His mind made up, he was out of the Jeep and walking toward the stairs before he fully realized what he was doing. It was like his body was on autopilot as it carried him up that narrow metal staircase to Newton’s door.

He knocked, already preparing himself to break the fucker down if Newton didn’t answer. He’d gladly pay for a new door if that’s what it took.

But one way or another, he wasn’t leaving this spot until he made sure Newton was okay.

Please, please be okay.