Chapter 12

Lily

The touch of Alex’s hands and mouth on me sent electricity through my body. He kissed like a pro, or at least I imagined he was a pro. This is what a fraternity president did. He took girls to his bedroom and had his way with them. I wanted the full college experience. Or any experience in general. Alex didn’t have to know I was a virgin. You didn’t get high marks in high school and skip freshman classes in college by going out and dating all the time. If Alex knew, then he probably would escort me out of his house again and break our deal. He had enough tools from our study session to get decent grades in the class.

But I wanted this. Oh boy did I want this. Definitely more than he did.

Grandma always wanted me to experience life, reminding me about my parents and how life was too short to work all the time. I listened to her advice, but I never applied it. Now was the time to do so.

Losing my virginity to the hottest guy at school was the perfect opportunity. Sure, he didn’t love me, but right now, that didn’t matter. Experimenting with Alex would be the start of a new Lily. Going into this without any expectations would work in both of our favors. We were both attracted to each other, wasn’t that all we needed for this sort of thing to happen? It might break the awkward tension between us too.

I placed my hand on his and moved his hand further up my skirt. His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed.

My entire body tensed up until his fingers brushed over the front of my panties. I sucked in a breath as he smoothed his fingers over the hem. I wasn’t sure what to expect. Was he going to dive right in and this would be over quickly? I wasn’t sure if I should tell him up front that I was a virgin. Would that stop him? Guys seemed to be weird about that. But I wasn’t going to stop being a virgin until I had sex, so I decided to keep it to myself.

His hand moved out from under my skirt and tugged it off. For a moment I thought he was a mind-reader. Could he somehow tell I was inexperienced?

My lips parted as his hands moved to my waist. He dragged them up my sides, tugging my shirt with them. My shirt scrunched above my chest, exposing my breasts to him. He trailed a finger over my bra, and my breathing quickened again.

“You’re so beautiful, Lily,” he said. His eyes were dark and lidded as if he were about to fall asleep. But when his eyes met mine, his blue irises were almost black. He was as turned on as me. That thought caused an eruption of tingles to course through my middle.

I cupped his cheek in my hand and gently pulled him down to kiss me again.

His mouth and hand moved in sync, massaging multiple parts of my body. His kisses were urgent, enough that I could barely keep up. My mind whirred as his hands massaged my breasts. No one other than me had touched my chest before, and it was mind-numbing. I moaned into his mouth, the sound completely involuntary. My eyes shot open, and heat moved through me.

Alex didn’t seem phased. I supposed it was a good thing that this felt good and I expressed it. If it didn’t feel good then why would we be doing it at all?

“Sit up,” he said.

I grabbed onto his arm, and he slowly pulled me up. Sitting down, we were face to face.

He burrowed his face into my neck, and I leaned my head back, feeling the warmth of his kiss on the sensitive skin. His hand reached around and unclasped my bra. Before I knew it, my breasts were exposed. I had to quell the urge to cover up. Whenever I changed in my dorm room, I always maneuvered a way to change without even Amber seeing me. Now, I was in a brightly-lit room while the hottest guy I’d ever kissed cupped my breast in his hand. His thumb rolled over the peak, and that little moan gave me away again.

“That feels so good,” I said breathlessly.

“You want to know what else feels good?” he asked, and then he showed me.

His mouth replaced his hand. His tongue swirled over the peak, and my legs drew in closer to my body. His free hand moved across my belly and down to my panties again.

I wrapped my arm around his waist, holding onto him as my body numbed under his touch. He moved down, lower, until he reached the now-damp part of my body.

I could barely hold myself upright. As if Alex sensed that, he tugged a pillow over to me and gently laid me down. My legs opened for him, and he swirled the tip of his finger around the most sensitive part of my body.

“Oh my god,” I breathed.

Alex chuckled and knelt beside me. The air clung to the wet parts of my body, making them even more sensitive.

He pulled my panties down, and I moved my legs to help him. The need to cover up went out of my mind completely as Alex quickly shoved off his pants. Our clothes landed on the floor with a gentle whump.

The bulge in Alex’s boxers was unmistakable. I knew that if I tried to do anything about him, he’d have to know that I was a virgin. Instead, I brought him back down to me to kiss me. Grounding myself in the idea of what we were about to do, helped ease my nerves.

We kissed for some time. Alex took his sweet time exploring my body while I couldn’t help but trace the lines of his toned muscles. His body was amazing and even more so up close.

It wasn’t until I heard a crinkling sound that I snapped out of our little make out bubble.

I glanced down at the condom wrapper. Where had that come from?

He looked into my eyes, his eyebrows slightly raised in question. He was waiting for me to make the decision. We’d already gone this far, and I wanted to lose my virginity to him. There were so many firsts between us, why not go all the way? I hadn’t even thought of a condom, which was totally irresponsible of me. I was glad he came prepared.

I nodded slightly, and he grinned.

He stood up from the bed and pulled down his boxers. He sprung free, and I tried not to stare at it too long. God, I was such an amateur.

He rolled the condom on and came back to the bed.

I pulled my shirt off, completely exposing my body to him. I laid down again, and he crawled over me, propping his hands above me. He reached down and slowly guided himself to my opening.

I couldn’t help the tension in my body. I tried to keep calm but this was a momentous occasion in my life. I knew it was going to hurt, but how badly? Would I bleed? I read that girls bleed sometimes. I didn’t even think of that! Would he think I tricked him?

“Relax,” he said, finding my mouth again. His tongue darted inside, massaging my own. With him kissing me like that, it was enough to distract me.

He gently pushed himself inside of me.

I lightly gasped as I stretched to fit him inside of me. The pressure wasn’t anything I could describe, but once he was in, I didn’t know what the big fuss was about. That was, until he started to move.

“You’re so wet for me,” he said, his eyes closing.

Was I turning him on? The idea of that made me relax under him. I reached up and pulled his mouth to mine.

His kisses crashed against mine as we made love.

The strange feeling turned on a dime to something amazing. He was slow and gentle but hit me in the right spot. Before I knew it, my body became as sensitive as my lower parts, and as his movements quickened, the pleasure increased until I couldn’t bear it anymore.

My entire body exploded with pleasure, and I cried out.

Alex kept going for several more moments before his body tensed as well.

I grabbed onto him for dear life as he slowed down ever so slightly.

I came out of me so quickly that I jumped a little. I quickly sat up and looked at the sheets.

Phew. No blood.

He grabbed my arm. “Don’t go,” he said. His chest heaved with effort.

I laid down next to him. “I’m not going anywhere.”

He smiled and pulled me closer to him. He kissed my shoulder and pulled the blankets over us. Even though I was no longer exposed, the feeling of his skin on mine left an imprint on my body.

Feeling as if I’d just run a marathon, I allowed myself to drift in the comfort of his arms. I couldn’t believe I’d just had sex with Alex. Or at all!

A sharp knocking on the door woke me from my delirium. My eyes shot open as Alex sat up. His face twisted with anger.

“What?” he growled.

The door flung open, and Bret stood in the doorway. His eyes darted between Alex and me. My stomach knotted up as a cocky grin formed on his lips.

“Way to go, prez,” he said, clapping his hands. “I see you just needed the right freshman to get you back in the game.”

“Get out of here,” Alex said.

My entire body felt as if someone lit me on fire.

Bret backed out of the room, and the second the door closed, I jumped out of bed and found my clothes, throwing them on. I couldn’t believe I was so stupid to think that Alex might have liked me. This was just a game to all these frat guys.

“Where are you going?” Alex asked.

“I’m leaving.”

“Why?”

“This was a mistake.”

He tried to touch me, but I jumped away from him.

Even though I was fully clothed, I felt naked and exposed next to him.

“Because Bret came in here? Don’t do this.”

I shook my head and ran out the door with Alex calling after me.

I tried to keep my tears at bay as I ran down the stairs. I raced through the crowd and found Amber. “We need to go.”

She looked at me. “What’s wrong?”

I glanced at the stairs where Alex was searching for me.

I dragged Amber to the front door.

“Lily, wait!” Alex shouted over the music. “I’m sorry.”

His apologies fell flat against the rest of the sounds of the party as I made my quick exit.

I barely made it across the street toward campus before I broke down in Amber’s arms.