CHAPTER NINETEEN

Undertaker sat in his office as Blood and Sandman strode in. He’d asked Mooch to send them up as soon as they arrived. He nodded toward the chairs in front of the desk. “Have a seat.”

Their big bodies sank into the leather.

“What’s up, Prez?” Sandman asked, his hand digging into a bowl of peanuts kept on the desk.

Undertaker’s serious gaze moved between them. “I need some help with something. First, I want you both to know this isn’t club business. This is personal. You don’t have to help me out on this one, and I won’t hold it against you if you want to pass, but I’d appreciate your help.”

That had Blood frowning. “Personal how? You got trouble?”

“I’m goin’ after someone who hurt my girl. It’s payback that’s long overdue.”

Blood frowned. “She okay?”

“Yeah. This happened several years ago. Goin’ after the man who murdered her husband; he shot him down in cold blood outside their home.”

“Fuck,” Blood hissed out.

“Shit.” Sandman leaned forward. “That’s rough man. Hate that it happened to her.”

“Was she there? She see it happen?” Blood asked.

Undertaker shook his head. “But this guy fucked up her happily-ever-after. She had the house, the husband, and a baby on the way. This motherfucker took it all away in one swoop. She buried a husband, lost the baby, and had to sell the home she loved because of the bad memories.”

“Jesus Christ.” Blood ran a hand over his jaw.

“She’s been just existing for the last few years, pouring every waking minute into work and trying to survive the guilt she feels.”

“Guilt? For what?” Sandman asked.

“She blames herself. Shooter was the ex-husband of a woman she was trying to help. They caught him, but he walked on all charges. I intend to see that wrong, righted. So, you boys in?”

“Hell yeah, I’m in.” Sandman’s brows shot up almost as if he were offended his President even had to ask that question.

“Fuck yeah. You know where we can find the murdering sack of shit?” Blood asked.

“Had Bug do a little digging. He tracked him to Detroit.”

Blood nodded. “Let’s go.”

“Oh, we’re goin’, Blood. Sure as God’s vengeance, we’re goin’.”

Sandman leaned forward. “What are we waitin’ for? When do we leave?”

“First thing in the morning. We’ll meet up here.”

They both stood. Undertaker stared up at them. “I appreciate this, boys. More than you know.”

Blood pounded a fist to his palm. “I’m lookin’ forward to getting’ my hands on this one.”

They left, and Undertaker leaned back in his chair and stared into space, brushing the fingers of one hand absently through his beard.

He wasn’t sure how AJ would take it if she knew what he planned to do. Didn’t matter, he had no intention of her finding out, at least not until it was done. It would be enough to let her know, somewhere down the line, that this asshole had finally gotten what he deserved.

There was a soft tapping on the door.

“Come in,” he hollered.

The door opened a foot, and Holly stuck her head in. “Are you busy? I can come back.”

“No, now’s fine. Come on in.”

Holly moved to one of the chairs facing the desk and sat.

“You okay?” Undertaker asked.

“I’m fine.” She rubbed her palms on her denim-covered thighs and his eyes followed the movement. He leaned forward, elbows on the desk, giving her his full attention.

“What’s up?”

“I just… the other day at the barbeque, seeing you with Dr. Carter? Well, you obviously like her.”

“I do.”

“When you’re with her it’s like you don’t even know I’m there.”

“Holly, that’s not true.”

“It’s not that it’s a bad thing. No, actually it’s a good thing. It’s good that I got to see it with my own eyes, because for a long time you tried to tell me, and I didn’t want to listen. I didn’t want to believe you.”

“Believe what?”

“The truth about us. I get it.”

He watched her closely.

“You’ve never looked at me that way. You never could. I’m just tired, okay. I’m tired of spending every day worrying that I might lose you. I mean, I already have. I never had you in the first place.”

He searched her eyes. “I’m sorry, Holly.”

She nodded. “Me, too. But it’s okay, because now I know what I have to do. I have to let you go.”

He nodded, studying how she was handling this.

She glanced around his office. “Everybody warned me that you weren’t into me and that you never would be.” She huffed out a small laugh. “Even you. And in my heart I kind of knew that, but when we were together it just felt real. I wanted it to be real.”

“I know.”

“It’s time for us to be honest with each other and with ourselves.”

“I was always honest with you, Holly. I never wanted to hurt you. You know that?”

She nodded. “I know, and”—she shrugged—“I guess I kind of fell in love with you a little. I know you do care about me in your own way; you’re just not in love with me. I mean how could you be?”

“I care about you, Holly. I want you to be happy. And when you’re ready there’s going to be some guy who falls head over heels for you.”

She smiled. “Maybe.”

“No maybe about it, darlin’.”

“Cat and I went looking at apartments.”

“Did you?” He nodded. “That’s great. Find any you like?”

She shrugged. “There were a couple that were okay. I haven’t decided yet.”

“When you decide, I want you to know you’ll be protected. I’ll see to it.”

She nodded. “I know. Can I… can I still come by here? I mean, now and then?”

“Absolutely.”

She stood. “Okay, well, thank you. I mean it, thank you for everything you’ve done for me.”

“You’re welcome.” He stood and came around the desk. “Come here.”

She moved into his arms and hugged him.

He squeezed her arms. “Everything’s going to be fine, Holly. You’ll see.”