Varick
Ever since I'd died, time had become a wheel; no matter how much passed, I always ended up in the same place. I recalled the gift of life, the fragility of it. The plans, the ambition, the possibilities. Now, I had an eternity to achieve anything I ever desired, yet somehow the allure was gone. Why did a human spend their life rising to the top in their career? Or fall in love, create a family, build a home with their own two hands?
Achievement. To say they'd actually done something with the time they'd been given. But if you're given forever, what did it matter? No one would remember me, because I had no expiration date to be remembered beyond. That was, so long as a Helsing didn't decide to end me. Or I didn't rip my own head off out of the sheer exhaustion of merely existing.
As I stood watching the girls sleep, or, should I say, watching her sleep, I thought on these things. And I thought about my reason for still being here. Why did I remain? What was holding me back from ending it all? I'd lived longer than any man ever should.
Initially, I'd spent many years enjoying the freedom immortality had given me. I'd achieved everything one could achieve under such circumstances. And then the Helsings brought me here and still I remained. Still clung to life like a leech on skin. Something had kept me here.
I couldn't simply go on living as I had been, owned by the Helsings, doing their bidding. I was starting to feel something watching the games. Rage. Revulsion. Even regret. And I wasn't sure I could see this one through.
As the time arrived that I had to wake the girls, I decided I wanted things to change. Because, dammit, there had to be more to immortality than this shit.
As the girls roused and made their way to breakfast, some of them began discussing tactics for the day ahead. Selena was weaving amongst them with a bowl of porridge clamped between two hands. I tried to split my attention between the other contestants, but somehow my eye was always drawn back to her. The dark, waterfall curls that flowed over her shoulders, the cool determination in her inky eyes, the curve of her lower lip. I jolted as I realised I was appreciating her beauty, not just her enticing scent. That was a first for me since I was turned. And perhaps due to my recent drink. Sometimes, after a decent fill, human emotions were dragged up to the surface for a while, putting me back in touch with humanity for a few fleeting hours. Maybe that was why she was still of interest to me.
I let myself bask in the feeling, picturing that small, crooked smile she gave her friends, replacing the glowers she saved for me. Her contempt for me wasn't surprising. None of the girls ever enjoyed my company, but most ignored me once they accepted I wasn't a threat. Selena, however, turned her attention to me occasionally. Like she wanted to provoke me, to take out her frustration.
If she knew a better fed V like me was actually ten times stronger than those she faced daily, perhaps she'd show me more respect. But, in a way, I liked our back and forth conversations. She jabbed at me, and not in the way the Helsings did. Selena was trying to suss me out. For what purpose, I had no idea. But it felt good to be seen by her. Even if all she saw was a monster.
When the girls had finished eating, I gathered them together in a semi-circle. Several pairs of bright, round eyes gazed at me. The contestants were always attentive after the second round. Hoping anything I said could offer them a lifeline.
Fifteen left.
How many would reach the next checkpoint? Would Selena make it through this one?
An uncomfortable, prickling feeling ran through my gut as I projected today's map onto the wall.
“Today, you will be heading here.” I pointed to a red dot on the map further north and inland.
“But that's only a few miles,” Angelina said, her pale eyebrows lifting in hope. I noted with a flare of anger, that she was once again wearing Selena's dress. Why Selena let her get away with it, I had no idea.
“Yes,” I confirmed. “But you won't be done once you reach that spot.” I remained vague, as was ordered of me, but the fear that flashed across the girls' faces was disturbing.
“What's there?” Selena demanded, catching my eye.
More than anything I wanted to tell her, so she could be prepared. But if the Helsings found out I gave any of the girls an advantage, I'd be executed without hesitation.
I grabbed a handful of the small backpacks on the floor, passing them out.
Kite yanked hers open then her head snapped up. “This is it?” She held out the single energy bar they'd been gifted today. “How long does this round last?”
“You have six hours.” At my words, a commotion broke out. I raised my voice louder as I continued and they quickly fell silent once more. “Having less time is a disadvantage, as you may have already figured out. In this round, it can be a death sentence.”
“What does that mean?” Cassandra asked, glancing at Selena beside her.
Determinedly, I kept my gaze on her as I answered. “You will find out soon enough.”
I grabbed fresh stakes from a rack on the wall. I passed them out one at a time and when I reached Selena, I held onto hers for half a second more. “Use everything in your packs today,” I said directly to her, but loud enough that everyone could hear.
She gave a small nod, eyeing me curiously as I moved away.
When the girls were armed, I led them out of the cave into the cove. The Helsings had constructed a wooden lift there hundreds of years ago, scaling the sheer cliff wall. Endless fun for me, as I got the job of hoisting the cable that caused the lift to rise. Ushering them all onto the rectangular platform, I dragged across the wooden gate and moved to the pulley system.
I yanked down on the steel cable and the lift rose up the side of the cliff with a jerk. I continued to pull, hand after hand, dragging the cable down as they raised toward the cliff edge high above.
As it reached the top, I waited whilst the girls filed out, a niggling feeling in my stomach distracting me. I didn't have any time to dwell on it as the castle horn blared across the island, and round three of the game began.