Heh, I guess I’m not so scary after all.

Slowly, I stepped into the woman’s apartment. She had the appearance of a small brown sparrow, and I feared that if I moved too quickly or made any sudden movements, she would fly away with fright.

Once I was inside, she closed the door behind me, locking the latch. She lingered there, her eyes moving quickly, surveying the apartment. She was definitely afraid of something. But what?

She didn’t say a word as she walked up to her baby’s crib, rocking it back and forth, trying to quell the baby’s cries.

But still, the baby kept screaming.

“What’s wrong?” I asked, standing beside her.

She did not answer me. Instead, she looked down at her baby, sadness painting her face. The corners of her eyes began to water.

“What’s wrong?” I asked again, trying to scrutinize the child, but this was foreign territory for me. The little form was red-faced and trembling, its hands curled into fists. It looked like it was in distress, but for all I knew, it probably just had a bad case of indigestion – I mean, that was enough to make anyone grumpy.

“Nothing…” the woman whispered, shaking her head with tears rolling down her face.

Of course, I didn’t believe her for a moment.

I had always been bad at picking up on body language, but tears were a rather obvious sign.

Gently, I placed my hand on her shoulder and turned her so that she’d face me.

She looked up, her eyes already red and her body shaking with her silent sobs.

Awkwardly, I pulled her into a hug, trying my best to make it a comforting gesture. My hands ran up and down her back as I had seen people do in movies. She seemed to like it because her body grew limp against mine, so much so that if I hadn’t been supporting her, she would have crumbled to the ground.

“There. There,” I said a bit lamely. What else was I supposed to do? I was used to dealing with computers, and they didn’t need emotional support.

She sobbed for a little while, her tiny body feeling fragile pinned against mine. I feared that if I squeezed her just a little harder, she would snap like a twig.

“There. There.” I started to caress her hair, finding that I enjoyed the feeling of the silky strands running through my fingers.

Despite the circumstances, this was actually pretty nice.

Eventually, she pulled away, roughly wiping away her tears as if they embarrassed her.

“You should leave,” she said abruptly. “You shouldn’t be here. I shouldn’t have let you in.”

I frowned. Had I done something wrong?

“But… you need help.”

“No. I don’t,” she insisted.

“But your baby. Look, if you need a ride to the hospital, I have a car. I just can’t bear the thought of her crying all night long. She’s going to tucker herself out, poor thing.”

The woman looked at me for a while, her lips pressing together into a thin line. I had a sense that even though she had invited me into her home, she still didn’t quite trust me.

“What harm is it going to do if you tell me?” I added.

This seemed to work because her shoulders sagged and her harsh demeanor melted away. “She’s hungry…” she whispered so softly that I barely heard her.

“Oh, is that it?” I smiled. “That’s not so bad!”

The woman frowned.

I cocked my head in confusion. I didn’t get it. The baby was hungry. This seemed like an easy problem to fix. Feed the baby and everything would be okay. Right?

Silence filled the room, making the air thick and hard to breathe.

“Um…” I had no idea what to say at this point.

“I don’t have any food…” She tugged on a loose thread on her shirt. “And no money…” The thread snapped under her forceful touch. “I can no longer breastfeed.” She started to pace. “And now my baby is starving to death.” Tears sprung anew, trailing down her cheeks and onto her wrinkled blouse. “All my life, I’ve wanted to be a mother. I’ve dreamed of it. Pictured myself starting a happy little family, but I’ve failed. My baby is going to die because of me.”

Her sudden prattle of words took me by surprise. I blinked at her like I had just been stunned by a volley of rubber bullets.

Slowly, I parsed her words, making sense of them.

My eyes widened. “I’ll go buy some food!” I said quickly. I wasn’t about to let a baby starve to death when I had money in my pocket. I’d be the worst kind of monster.

Before she could stop me, I was already out the door.

“Wait! Come back!” she called out, but I ignored her, dashing down the stairwell.

* * *

When I reached the 24/7 pharmacy on the corner, I realized, like an idiot, that I had no idea what babies ate. Standing in the infant aisle, I was presented with so many choices that I had no idea where to start.

“Um…” I picked up a random can.

Similac: Complete nutrition for your baby’s first year.

That sounded promising. But how old was my neighbor’s baby?

Again, I had no idea.

I guess I would just need to buy one of each. It wasn’t like this stuff expired, right?

With a basket full of baby products, I walked up to the register. The girl behind the counter looked at me like I had three heads.

“Did you find everything you needed tonight…?” she asked her mandatory check-out question.

“I hope so.” I chuckled nervously. Dear God, I hope so. That poor baby was starving, and I had taken it upon myself to get it some food. I couldn’t fail. “Um… just to be sure… this is baby food… right?”

“Yes…?” The woman scrunched up her brows in confusion. “A lot of baby food.”

“Oh? Is it?” I rubbed the back of my neck. “Okay… see there’s this baby, about this big…” I held out my hands and started to list every detail I knew about the child.

The cashier listened, a blank stare on her face.

In the end, I left the pharmacy with some Similac and a bottle of milk.

Milk. Of course. How could I be so stupid?

Everyone knows babies drink milk.