Justus

Kaci’s heart raced as the phone rang. She stared out her window while she waited for Ed Taylor to answer, but I could see how nervous she was in her tight grip on the fast food bag. I could hear it in the rush of her pulse.

On sudden impulse, I pulled onto the side of the road and punched the button for the hazard lights.

She turned to me with a question in her arched brows.

“He doesn’t have to know we’re driving,” I said. Then I leaned across the center console and kissed her.

“Hello?” a man’s voice said from her phone, and Kaci pulled away from me with a startled expression.

I stifled a laugh.

“Yes. Hello? Mr. Taylor? This is Kaci Dillon.”

“Hello, Kaci. Faythe told me to expect your call, but I have to say, I’m not sure what it is I can do for you. I assume this is about Justus Alexander?”

“About his trial, yes.” She looked nervous, but that wasn’t evident in her voice.

“I was under the impression that his attempt to flee the country just days before the trial meant he wasn’t going to show up.”

Kaci flinched. “He didn’t flee. We…eloped.”

“You…?” Taylor sputtered in shock. Clearly Faythe hadn’t passed that bit of news along.

“Yes. We’re married. But we’re still very much in the country and of course we’re coming to his trial. Justus is less of a flight risk now than he’s ever been,” Kaci said. And she probably had no idea how right she was.

I didn’t want to leave, if she wasn’t coming with me.

That didn’t mean I wouldn’t have to leave. But I no longer wanted to.

“So, what is it I can do for you…Mrs. Alexander.”

Kaci’s face went as blank as an unmarred whiteboard, and I have to admit, it took me a second to realize what he was saying, as well. I hadn’t heard her called that yet. I hadn’t heard anyone called that since my parents had died, five years before. And we certainly hadn’t discussed whether or not she’d be changing her name.

I wasn’t even sure she was going to keep the ring.

Her mouth worked silently for a second, as she struggled to refocus her thoughts. I took her free hand, and she gave me a small, tense smile.

“Kaci?” Tayler said over the line.

“Yeah. Sorry. That’s new. Anyway, Justus heard that you’re planning to vote to convict him, but I told him that couldn’t be true, because you haven’t heard the evidence against him yet. You haven’t even met him yet. So, you couldn’t possibly have made up your mind already. Right?”

I gave her a smile, impressed. She’d backed him into a pretty good corner, from which he really only had one option—claim to be willing to listen to the evidence.

Silence met her question. I held my breath, waiting for Taylor’s response.

And finally, “Of course I haven’t made up my mind yet. The trial hasn’t even started. But I have to be honest with you, Kaci,” Taylor said. “If his testimony corroborates what I’ve heard—if he really killed a stray at the Jackson Zoo, where humans could have stumbled upon evidence of our existence—I can’t in good conscience vote to acquit.”

“And if there were extenuating circumstances?”

“Kaci, honey—”

She made a gagging face over the unwelcome diminutive.

“I think that murder with a risk for exposure is where we have to draw a hard line. Especially if we’re going to be acknowledging this new Pride full of strays. They have to know from the very beginning where we stand on the issues that affect us all. And where they’re expected to stand on those issues.”

“Okay.” Kaci nodded. “I’m just a little confused by that, because I killed four people, but I was never brought up on charges at all, even though what I did made it onto the national news in Canada. That’s a pretty big risk of exposure.”

“That’s an entirely different case,” Taylor insisted. “You were a traumatized child. You had no idea what you were doing, or what was happening to you.”

“That’s my point. There were extenuating circumstances. Circumstances very similar to what Justus was going through when he was infected against his will—targeted for infection specifically to discredit his brother’s authority—then unleashed in the midst of an unchaperoned, unassisted transitional period upon people who’d hurt him. I mean…” She paused, hazel eyes narrowed, and it was a shame that Taylor was missing the entire visual half of her performance. Because she was magnificent. “…it’s almost like you’re saying that what I did was okay because I’m a girl, but despite undeniably similar circumstances, what Justus did was not okay, because he’s a guy. That’s textbook gender bias. So, I’m pretty sure that can’t be what you’re actually saying. Right, Mr. Taylor?”

Holy shit, she was amazing.

I wanted to grab her phone and hang it up, then kiss her all over, right there on the highway. I’d bailed friends and girlfriends out of trouble—and out of jail—several times, but no one had ever gone to bat for me like that, other than Titus.

During the silence that followed, I pictured Ed Taylor, whom I’d never met, pulling his hair out by the roots. It must suck to be fully grown—and an Alpha, at that—and realize you’ve been verbally hemmed in by an eighteen-year-old.

“Of course that’s not what I’m saying. And I believe I’ve already answered your question, Kaci. The other members of the tribunal and I will reserve judgement until after we’ve heard the evidence. But I would advise you not to get your hopes up, dear. I understand that you see similarities between your circumstances and Mr. Alexander’s, but it’s entirely likely that other people won’t see those similarities.”

“I’m sure you’re right. People tend to see what they want to see,” Kaci said. “And my advice to you, Mr. Taylor, is not to underestimate either me or Justus. We may be young, and we may not have been born into your world, but we are strong, and we are determined. And we have nothing left to lose.”

Kaci hung up the phone and dropped it into the center console, then she leaned back in her chair, one hand over her eyes. She breathed deeply through her mouth, and the rise and fall of her chest was the sexiest, most mesmerizing thing I’d ever seen. Other than the mouth she’d just used to put a fucking Alpha in his place.

“I think I just threatened a council member.” She dropped her hand and looked up at me, hazel eyes swimming in some heady combination of fear and excitement. “Why the hell did I just threaten a council member?”

“Because you’re amazing. Because you’re badass. Because you are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, and you’re even sexier when you talk.”

She sat up, laughing, and I needed to touch her so badly. “I’m pretty sure you could lose your man-card for saying something like that.”

“I don’t need my man-card. All I need is you.” I tugged some slack into my seatbelt, then leaned over the console to kiss her again.

“Why do you keep doing this?” she murmured as I kissed my way down her neck, trying to ignore the way the console dug into my side. “I can’t think when you do this.”

“That’s part of why I do it. Change of plans.” I shifted the car back into drive and flicked on my left blinker, then accelerated into traffic. “We’re stopping for the night.”

“But we’ve only been on the road for a couple of hours.”

“I don’t care. They don’t know where we’re headed, and with any luck, you’ve convinced them I’m no longer a flight risk. We can afford to take time out for a nice dinner and a good night’s sleep.” Especially considering that this was basically our honeymoon.

“Okay, but can we afford to pay for those?”

I nodded. “I have a little cash left.”

We drove another forty minutes, until I found an exit advertising a decent hotel, then I pulled off the highway just over the Utah state line.

The hotel was nothing special, and neither was our room. But Kaci sang while she showered and though I kept my distance, like a gentleman, I couldn’t help picturing her in there, dripping wet and slick with soap. I’d seen her naked at least half a dozen times, post-shift, and while I understood that nudity after a shift was not considered sexual, I remembered wondering, idly, why none of the enforcers seemed to want anything to do with her. Especially the ones near our age.

I mean, the council had been willing to start a war to get Robyn back, because women were so rare in the shifter world, and Kaci was gorgeous. I couldn’t be the only one who’d ever noticed—”

“Your turn.”

I looked up to see her standing in front of me, wrapped in a towel, her long, chestnut colored-hair dripping over one shoulder. Her face was bare, her skin fresh with the fragrance of whatever soap she used, and I wanted to touch her so badly. I wanted to taste her.

I wanted to feel her hands—

“Um…” She glanced pointedly at the bulge in my pants.

“Yeah. Sorry. Just ignore that.” On my way into the bathroom, I stopped to kiss a drop of water from her bare shoulder. When she didn’t object, I ran one hand down her arm and over her hip.

She made this sexy, needy sound deep in her throat, and I groaned. Then I escaped into the shower before I said something I’d regret.

By the time I emerged with wet hair and fresh breath, Kaci had applied makeup she didn’t need and put on clean clothes. “I didn’t pack anything fancier than a t-shirt, so I hope this dinner isn’t too nice.”

“Screw the dinner.” My voice held a gravelly note—an obvious arousal that had never been quiet so obvious before I was infected. “We could order room service, and you wouldn’t have to wear anything.”

“Ha, ha. I’m dressed. We’re going out.”

“As you wish. Our options in SmallTown, Utah include a local steakhouse, a sandwich shop, and an ‘upscale casual dining’ place that offers cliffside views. None of them are rated higher than four out of five stars, or more expensive than two out of four dollar signs on my review app. So, please select from the best mediocrity has to offer. And keep in mind that if you come spend forever on an island with me, I will cook for you every night.”

“You cook?” She looked so impressed I hated to admit that I was joking.

“Okay, I will take a cooking class, then I will cook for you every night.”

“I don’t cook either.” She unplugged her phone from the power bank on the hotel desk and slid it into her pocket. “We might actually starve, alone on an island together.”

“You do realize this won’t be an uncharted island, right? Not a deserted island. Just an island with no local shifter government in place to tell us we can’t live there. There will be restaurants on the island. And if you still have that ring on your finger, we’ll be able to afford to eat there every night. Or buy all the restaurants and make them deliver to us.”

She laughed as we headed for the door. “This started out as a very romantic offer to cook for me every night of my life, but now it sounds like you’d be willing buy out every restaurant on this hypothetical island to avoid doing just that.”

“Not to avoid, to give you options. And this island isn’t hypothetical. It’s just as yet unselected.” I closed the door behind us and checked to make sure it was locked—not that we had much to steal at the moment—then I put my arm around her waist as we headed for the elevator. And she let me. “You know, I’m not opposed to letting you choose the island. In fact, I would go just about anywhere you want to go, if you would just get on a plane with me.”

“Why?” Kaci poked the call button, then turned to me and slid her arms around my neck. She looked up at me with eyes that seemed more green than brown in the weird hotel lighting, and pressed her entire body against mine. “Why would you want to go anywhere with me?”

“Because I like you.” Because she was beautiful, and strong, and willing to threaten an Alpha on my behalf.

“You like me now. But you might not like me next week.”

“Of course I will.”

“You don’t know that. No matter what you think, you hardly know me.”

“That is not true. In the past twenty-four hours, you’ve blackmailed me, kissed me, pushed me away, married me, stolen two cars with me, taken off your pants and then fallen asleep next to me, and threatened an Alpha for me. And I’ve loved every second of it. What on earth could you do to make me not like you, after all of that?”

“That’s the easy part, Justus.” She kissed me, then tugged me into the empty elevator, when the door opened.

“How the hell is any of that easy?”

“It’s exciting. It’s something new every other minute. It’s danger, and adrenaline, and close calls. The hard part is what comes after.”

“Okay, I’ll bite. What comes after this?”

“Nothing.”

“Huh?” I pushed the button for the lobby level.

“Forever on an island? Lying on the beach and eating seafood? What you’re actually describing is a lifetime full of nothing. That might be great for a month, or maybe even a year. But eventually, you’ll get bored with the tide, and the fish, and the deck chairs. And with me.”

The elevator opened in the lobby, and I followed her out to the car, so I could watch her walk in front of me. “Yeah, I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of that,” I called after her, as I watched her hips move. “But I assume you have an alternative suggestion?”

“Why would you assume that?”

I unlocked the car with the fob, then rushed forward to pull her door open before she could get to it. “Because it’s rude to tear down someone’s fantasy without providing an alternative fantasy.”

“Then you admit the island is a fantasy?” Kaci sank into the passenger’s seat and looked up at me.

I made a mental note to stop underestimating her verbal prowess. That girl could back a lawyer into a corner using nothing but his own words, against him. “I admit nothing.”

“That’s a solid trial strategy,” she said as I slid behind the wheel. “But maybe not a very solid cornerstone for a marriage.”

“So, this is a marriage now?”

“This is…insane,” she finally finished, with a quiet smile. “You’re insane.”

“Now, that’s a solid trial strategy.”

She threw her head back and laughed, and I stopped the car with us still halfway out of the parking spot so I could lean across the console and taste the tender flesh beneath her jaw. “Seriously, we could just blow dinner off and feast on each other, Kaci,” I whispered against her skin. “I’m not even hungry.”

Tires squealed, and a car horn speared my thoughts. I growled at the car stuck behind us in the aisle, and she laughed again. “Well, I’m hungry.”

“Fine.” I backed the rest of the way out, then pulled out of the parking lot onto the road. “Dinner it is. But then, I intend to taste other things.”

“Sure.” Kaci grinned at me. “As long as those other things include chocolate syrup, cream filling, or whipped cream.”

I groaned at the dirty images her dessert cravings called to my mind. “Oh, I think we can definitely make that happen.”

* * *

“This isn’t exactly what I had in mind,” I said as I tipped the room service waiter.

“I’m sorry, sir?” He glanced down at the tray he’d just set on the table, searching for the problem.

“He’s talking to me.” Kaci came out of the bathroom with her hair in a ponytail and her face scrubbed clean. “But this is exactly what I had in mind. Chocolate syrup.” She pointed to the slice of cheesecake drizzled with chocolate. “Cream filling.” The stuffed raspberry tart. “And whipped cream.” On top of a huge slice of red velvet cake.

“You two really going to eat all that?” the waiter asked on his way out of the room.

“Oh, those are just for her,” I said as I closed the door in his face. Kaci was all the dessert I needed.

“This is amazing!” She rubbed her hands together as she looked over the tray full of sweets. “I’ve never had room service! Maybe we should have just stayed here.”

“You’ve never had room service?”

“Nope. Haven’t spent much time in hotels. Shifters tend to rent cabins or houses, for privacy when they travel. And I haven’t traveled much.” She scooped a finger full of whipped cream from the cake and licked it off her finger. “I don’t know what to eat first.”

“All of them.” I tucked all three sets of napkin-wrapped utensils beneath my arm, then picked up the cake and the tart. “Grab that last one and follow me.” I set both plates on the middle of the still neatly made comforter, then started unwrapping silverware.

“On the bed?” She sounded scandalized, and my new goal for the night became drawing that sound out of her again—without food.

“Yes. It’s like a hotel picnic. Unless you’re planning to make a mess. If that’s the case, I’m going to have to ask you to eat them all three…off me.” I pulled my shirt over my head and dropped it on the floor. “You know, to preserve the linens.”

She laughed as she carefully crawled onto the bed, holding the cheesecake plate in one hand. “Funny. Put your shirt back on.”

“Take yours off, I countered.”

“Not gonna happen.” But she was grinning.

“Well, I think at least one of us should be topless.” I started to sit, then noticed something missing. “Would you like a drink with those?”

“Just water, please. I don’t care if I never see vodka again.”

“That’s fair, considering your first experience. But I would like to point out, in defense of alcohol everywhere, that in slightly smaller, slower quantities, it has its advantages.” But I took two waters from the mini fridge and left all the little bottles of alcohol alone. If she wasn’t drinking, neither was I.

“Here.” I handed her an unopened water bottle, then crawled onto the bed and sat cross-legged next to her, in front of the row of desserts.

“You know, I’m perfectly willing to share.”

“Well, okay. If you insist. But you go first.” I gave her a wicked smile. “And just so you know, that’s my policy in all other areas, as well.”

Her brows rose. “Or we could go together…”

“That’s a lot easier with dessert than with other things, but sure, I’m game.” I cut off the tip of the cheesecake slice and fed it to her.

She moaned around the bite, and the sound was…pleasant. So I fed her a bite of red velvet cake, and she moaned again. Next, I tried the tart, but some of the cream filling stuck to her lip, and she licked it off, and—

“Are you aware that you are dirty when you eat dessert?”

Kaci froze. “What?” she said around a mouthful of tart.

“You make erotic sounds when you eat dessert.”

Her eyes went wide. She slapped both hands over her mouth and chewed furiously. “I do not!”

“Yes, you do. And that may be the hottest thing I’ve ever seen.”

She dropped her fork onto the cake plate and pushed it toward the end of the bed. “Well I can’t eat that now!”

“Why not?”

“Because you’ll be sitting there thinking dirty things about me while I eat.”

“Kaci, I’d be thinking dirty things about you no matter what you were doing. You’re wearing a ring I gave you and sitting on a hotel bed. Also, you’re gorgeous.”

“You’re not bad to look at, yourself.” She cut another bit of cake without meeting my gaze. Then she changed the subject, as if the admission made her uncomfortable. “Wouldn’t it be great if we could eat room service every day? Neither one of us would have to cook or clean.”

“Actually, I could probably make that happen. We could live in a hotel on our island, if you want. You could have room service for every meal, and I could feed you cake for breakfast every morning. On the balcony, or in bed…”

“You can stop trying to convince me that life is more fun when you’re rich. I can’t imagine anyone would argue with that premise. The problem isn’t the money. It’s leaving the country forever.”

“I have to leave forever. You could come back and visit Faythe and Marc, and their ever-expanding litter of kidlets.”

“Oh, stop it.” She shoved my shoulder. “You know the boys are adorable.”

“Yes. But you’re more adorable.” I leaned in and nibbled on the tip of her shoulder as I slid one hand beneath the hem of her tee. Slowly.

She took my hand and her gaze captured mine. “Stop.”

“Why? I know you want me. I can smell arousal in your scent.”

“Oh my God!” She looked scandalized. And self-conscious.

“There’s no reason to be embarrassed. I think it’s hot.”

“It’s impolite to mention romantic intel gathered from pheromone detection, Justus!”

“Well when you say it like that, it sounds much more scientific than erotic.” I shrugged. “So, what? I’m just supposed to pretend I can’t tell?”

“Yes! Justus, I’m not going to sleep with you.”

“That’s because you’re afraid to admit you like me.”

“No. I do like you. It’s because I’m afraid to be married to you.”

“Why?” I pushed the other plates back. “I swear on my life that I didn’t marry you for the money.”

“I believe you.”

“Then what am I doing wrong?”

“Nothing.” She leaned forward and kissed me, and she tasted like chocolate, and raspberry, and other sweet things that had nothing to do with room service. “You’re not doing anything wrong. But that doesn’t mean this has to end with sex.”

“Sex would not be an ending. This doesn’t have to end at all. That’s the whole point of forever.” I kissed her again, and my hand slid into her hair. Her tongue met mine, and then she put her hands on my chest. She explored me while we kissed, as if she’d never done that before, and with a sudden, heartbreaking epiphany, I realized that she hadn’t, really, because she didn’t remember touching me like this before.

And for her, that meant it hadn’t happened.

For Kaci, none of what I remembered of the night before had happened. That must have been very scary for her. Very…confusing.

“How can this be real?” she murmured as I kissed my way down her neck. She clutched at me, as if she wanted more than she was willing to let herself have, and damn, I wanted to give her whatever she wanted. “How can anything that feels this good be happening to me, after—?”

“After what?” I sat up to look at her, and her eyes filled with tears.

“Justus, they’re not wrong. What they say about me is true. I am a monster. I found that dead woman in the woods, and I was so hungry, and—”

“No. Kaci, they could not be more wrong about you. You did what you had to do to survive. They’re the monsters, holding something like that against a little girl. You…are perfect.” I leaned in to kiss her neck. “The universe owes us this,” I whispered, pushing her hair back. Sliding the collar of her shirt over her shoulder, so I could taste the point where her collarbone ended. “After everything life has put us through, we deserve this, Kaci. You deserve better than I could ever give you.”

She laid back on the pillow, and I lay next to her, propped on my elbow. Her hand found mine on the comforter, and she clung to it, staring up at me. “You’re wrong. But I really want to believe you.”

I leaned down to kiss her, and her free hand slid behind my neck. Then down my back. Her mouth opened, and she pulled me closer, lower, until I lay stretched out over her, supporting my weight on one elbow, her hand still clutching mine.

We kissed like that forever, in the closest approximation of what she clearly wanted, but would not take, and I didn’t notice until much later that we’d kicked all the desserts onto the floor.

Later, she rolled toward me on the bed, still fully clothed, and laid her hand on my chest. Her head on my shoulder. Her eyes were closed, her breathing slow and even. She was nearly asleep. Or maybe she was barely awake.

“It’s because you’ll leave,” she murmured.

“What?” I scooted closer, bunching the comforter up between us, trying to get close enough to hear sounds she was hardly even making.

“If I sleep with you, this marriage will be real. You’ll get your money and you’ll leave. And I can’t go with you.”