Chapter One
Reena’s feet barely lifted off the floor as she made her way to the far booth in Pat’s Pub. Her feet hurt. Her legs hurt. Her arms hurt. Sinking into the seat, she leaned her head back and closed her eyes with a relieved sigh.
God. Even her damn eyelashes hurt.
“Wow. For someone who recently returned from a two-week vacation, you’re looking pretty trashed.”
Reena forced one eye open and saw Caitlyn Wallace slide into the other side of the booth. Stretching her lips into a semblance of a smile, Reena hummed. “Hmm…long day.”
“Busy next door?” Caitlyn asked, glancing at the archway Reena had shuffled through.
“Next door” referred to Sunday’s Side, the restaurant half of Caitlyn’s family business. The place Reena had worked since she was old enough to have a job. A little before that, if you counted the hours she’d hung out while Caitlyn babysat her when Reena had first come to live with her great-aunt Beth in Baltimore.
“Yeah, and we were down a waitress after Felicity took a tumble and rolled her ankle.”
Not that Reena’s tired state was due to being on her feet carrying trays stacked with food, drinks or dirty dishes for hours on end. But she wasn’t about to explain her exhaustion stemmed from seven nights of little sleep. The bliss of slumber had proven elusive since her returned from the lodge.
“So. How was the trip?” Caitlyn leaned forward, eagerness lighting up her pretty face. “Meet any hunky guys?”
Spine snapping straight, eyes popping wide, Reena stared at her friend and tripped over her own tongue. “W-why do you ask that?”
Caitlyn cocked an eyebrow.
Dammit. She’d given herself away.
She wanted to bang her head on the seat behind her or the table in front, but knew the action would be futile. Knocking herself senseless wouldn’t deter her friend. Caitlyn would only sit there and wait until she spilled the beans. She’d been doing that since Reena was eight with a high level of success. Why change things now?
With a sigh, Reena flopped back against the seat. “Fine. I met a guy.”
“Do tell,” Caitlyn purred. “I want all the juicy details.”
“Nothing to tell.” There might have been, but…
Well, Reena wasn’t sure why she’d stopped Rush. Or why he hadn’t kicked her out of his bed when she’d called a halt to their encounter.
“No juicy details,” she muttered with self-disgust.
Caitlyn eyed her with curiosity. “Does this guy have a name?”
“Rush.”
“What?” Caitlyn blinked, a baffled expression creasing her brow.
Reena smiled. She’d had a similar reaction when Rush had introduced himself. At first she’d thought it was a nickname, but he’d promptly produced his driver’s license as proof. “His name is Rush Whelan.”
“Unusual name.”
“Apparently he was born in half an hour, well before his expected arrival date so his mother called him Rush because he was obviously in one.” She shrugged.
It seemed stupid to name a kid that way, but as the days had gone on and she’d gotten to know Rush better, the name fit. Everything about him was a rush. From the way he looked to the way he moved to the way he made her feel. Then again, he’d taken his time in other ways…
“Did you at least kiss him?” Caitlyn asked. “Please tell me you at least got some tongue action.”
Reena laughed. “Yes. There was tongue.”
Her friend frowned. “But you didn’t do more.” It wasn’t a question.
She shook her head and once again gave herself a mental kick in the ass.
The orgasm he’d given her before she’d freaked out counted as more, but she wasn’t going to mention that mind-blowing event because then she’d have to explain her behavior, and she really didn’t want to. Not even to the woman who knew every other detail of her nonexistent sex life.
God. Why had she stopped him?
Caitlyn scrutinized her for a few moments before her frown turned to understanding. “And now you’re regretting not taking things further.”
“Yes,” she sighed. She’d regretted it the second they put their clothes back on, and hadn’t known how to get them back to the place where they would take them off again.
She’d been so stupid, letting her fear stop her from giving herself to Rush. A fool. There hadn’t been any man in her twenty-five years who’d inspired such powerful desire. She’d messed around some but never gotten around to going all the way, and now she feared her best chance had passed her by.
“I…” She swallowed with difficulty as words jammed in her throat.
Caitlyn reached for her hand. “It’s okay. It wasn’t the right time or the right guy.”
Reena could only agree on one of those points. “It was the right guy,” she whispered.
“Oh, Reena.”
Caitlyn slipped out of her side of the booth and squished in next to Reena, wrapping her up in a warm hug, one that brought back memories of childhood and how this woman had become such an important part of her life. The big sister and confidant she’d never had prior to arriving in Baltimore.
“Any chance you’ll see him again?” she asked.
A sound that could have been a laugh burst from Reena’s throat as she broke her friend’s embrace in spite of the overwhelming appeal of staying cocooned in Caitlyn’s comforting hug. “Not unless I take another vacation.”
“What’s stopping you?”
“I… It…”
What was stopping her? It wasn’t as though she had a job where she was really needed. Finding someone to cover her shifts wouldn’t be difficult. More often than not, she was at Sunday’s taking orders and delivering food because she couldn’t stand to be inside her empty house. Alone. She was pretty sure the Collinses put up with her because they didn’t seem to be able to say no to strays.
In the years since she’d met them, the Collins family had treated her like one of their own, welcomed her into their fold with open arms. Except she always felt as though she circled the group rather than mingling among the big, boisterous clan.
“Sabreena. Don’t take this the wrong way.”
Uh-oh, the use of her full name meant Caitlyn was going to get in her face about her aimless life again.
“You’re treading water. Something needs to change. I thought your trip might shake things up.”
“It was a holiday, a chance to visit a part of the country I’ve always wanted to see, not a journey to find myself or change my life.” Her words rang hollow though. Something had changed.
Inside, where she’d been happy—content—before her trip, she suddenly itched, twitched and twisted, as though she had to move. Except she didn’t know where she was meant to go.
“Why can’t you see what the rest of us do?” Caitlyn asked.
“What? What do you see?” She needed someone to tell her.
Since the death of her aunt, Reena had felt like she was floating through life, as though someone had cut the line on her anchor and she was adrift at sea, bobbing around while all the other boats whizzed past on the way to where they were going.
Not that there was anything wrong with having no destination in mind. She was sure plenty of people lived that way. Why did she need somewhere to go? She had money, a house, a job she enjoyed, and friends who were like family. Except…
“Do something with your stories.”
Reena jerked away, her mouth dropping open. “They’re not mine.”
“They are. You wrote them together. You illustrated them. Get them published.”
She shook her head. “I can’t. They’re not…” She couldn’t imagine letting go of those stories. They were the closest link she had to the woman who’d taken her in, treated her as her own, when no one else wanted her.
“Beth would want you to.”
Would she? Reena didn’t know. Could never take that step without being sure her Aunt would want that—and now it was too late. Still shaking her head, she stammered, “I-I can’t.”
“Then find something else to do with your talent. Write more stories. Draw the pictures to match.”
Reena shook her head so fast her teeth clacked together, her lungs seized and tears welled in her eyes, stung the back of her nose. The stories and drawings had always been something her and Aunt Beth did together. It was something only the two of them shared. They were never meant for anyone else, and she couldn’t imagine doing a story without her aunt.
“Stop.” Caitlyn gripped both her hands firmly. “Sabreena. Breathe.”
Pulling in a sharp breath, Reena tried to calm her racing heart, think beyond the irrational panic Caitlyn’s words made her feel. “Why are you pushing this now?”
Not that her friend hadn’t tried to talk her into getting the children’s stories published before. Although she’d never taken Caitlyn’s words seriously.
Caitlyn’s gaze softened, her mouth curving up in a small smile. “Because you’re talented. You should share your work. And I miss the vibrant girl you used to be, the woman who was starting to emerge before Beth got sick and died. She wouldn’t want you to hide away—”
“I’m not,” she protested.
“You are. And it has to stop.” Caitlyn squeezed her hands. “It reminds me of that scared little girl I met all those years ago.”
Oh. Oh god. Had she closed herself off again? Pulled back into her shell like the frightened eight-year-old she’d once been? “I’m sorry,” she whispered through a constricted throat.
“Don’t apologize. I understand. Completely. But like I did back then, I’m not going to let you hide yourself away. Beth would haunt me if I did but that’s not why I’m doing this. I miss my friend, Sabreena. She’s been slowly disappearing for the last few years and I want her back.”
Reena drew in a deep breath. Let it out slowly. Sucked in another. “Okay. I didn’t realize…” Nodding, she gave Caitlyn’s hands a reassuring squeeze and attempted a smile. “You’re right. I’ll fix it.”
“You don’t have to do it alone. I’ll be here if you need anything. Remember that.”
“I know.” Reena’s mouth curled into a genuine smile this time. “Thank you.”
“So. First up in the Reena-starts-living-again plan.” Caitlyn let go of Reena’s hands and rubbed her own together. “Contact the guy.”
“What? No. I can’t.”
“Why the hell not?”
“I don’t have his number.”
“Oh.” Caitlyn blew out a frustrated breath. A second later she sat up with a grin. “What was his name again? I’ll find out not only his phone number but his boot size.”
Reena laughed. “I know his boot size and I know where he works. I can call him there.”
“Great, do it now.” Her friend’s brow creased. “Does he work Sundays?” Caitlyn waved the question away with her hand “Doesn’t matter. Call. Leave a message if he’s not there.”
Should she tell Caitlyn she’d punched the number the lodge into her phone so many times this past week without hitting call that she knew it by heart? No. Best to keep that bit of info to herself.
And as much as she wanted to call Rush, she couldn’t. After their last night together, when she’d done something most men would call her a cock tease for, she doubted he’d want to talk to her. He’d probably been glad to see the back of her last week.
“Make the call.” Caitlyn crossed her arms, a determined glint in her eyes. “I’m sitting right here until you do.”
Spikes of fear stabbed at her belly while flutters of delight swept their way from head to toe at the thought of hearing his voice.
The emotions warred inside her for long moments. Delight won. With a trembling hand, Reena pulled her phone out of her bag and dialed the number for the lodge.