Ethan had an odd grin on his face as he lifted the long stick and shoved a Twinkie on the end of it. "You sat there, wingman. It's all on you." He shoved the snack cake into the fire and it sizzled into a roasted marshmallow. A snort brought my eyes to the other side of the blue and purple flames. Prancer, the fountain horse, was holding a paintbrush between his teeth. It fell into the flames as the horse opened his mouth and laughed. Ella, you're number thirteen, it whinnied.

"Ella."

"Ella."

My eyes popped open, obliterating the foggy dream. Mom was staring down at me with a worried expression. She lifted her hand to touch my forehead.

"What are you doing, Mom?"

"Checking to see if you have a fever. You overslept and I was worried you might be sick."

I sat up and looked at the clock. "Shit, I'm so late. It was my turn to open. Patty is going to be snarling at me the rest of the day." I climbed out of bed and scooted around my mom as I searched for my clothes.

It was obvious I was in a mad hurry, but that little detail didn't affect my mom. "You were talking in your sleep," she said, as I knelt down next to my bed to look for my second shoe.

"Was I? Guess I shouldn't have had that extra slice of pizza last night."

"It was something about Prancer and Twinkies."

I sat on the bed to pull on my shorts. "I'm pretty sure that when you talk in your sleep you're not expected to produce nuggets of wisdom, or coherent thoughts, for that matter."

I got up and brushed past her, but before I was out the door to the bathroom, she spoke again. "You were talking to Ethan."

I stopped cold in the doorway. I turned back to her, and even though I expected her eyes to be glassy, I was still not ready for it. My throat tightened.

"I dream about him all the time, Mom. Don't you?"

She lowered her eyes and nodded. "I just hadn't heard you talking to him in so long and you said his name and . . ."

I took the two steps between us and hugged her. "I know, Mom. I'm sorry about that."

I lowered my arms and she wiped her eyes and drew in a long, sniffly breath. "No, I'm being silly and sentimental. You should get going so Patty isn't upset. I'll be by the store later to buy things for the trip. And I'll fill the refrigerator for you."

"You don't have to, Mom. I'll be fine. I work at the store, remember?"

"Ella, I'm not going to leave you without food." She waved her fingers toward the door. "Now get going."

* * *

It was early, possibly too early for Fynn, which would explain why the fountain was empty. Or maybe he decided to pack up and leave town for good. I had to push that depressing thought from my head or I'd spend the rest of the day in a grim mood. He wouldn't have just left town without a word. Would he?

I parked my bike. The shop was already open. Which meant Patty had to unlock the door this morning. Which meant I was going to hear a lecture. And with the empty fountain across the park and Fynn's kiss still fresh on my lips, I was in no mood to be scolded.

I readied myself for it as I walked inside. Patty was at the counter. She didn't look up from her account books. In fact, she didn't even acknowledge me at all. There was a silent, coldness in the air. I was wishing for that lecture.

"I'm so sorry about this morning, Patty. I overslept."

"Uh huh." She didn't look up from her books, but from the movement of her pen, she wasn't actually doing any work.

I debated whether or not to continue my apology, but since my mood was already working against me, I decided to give it a rest. I walked into the backroom to get my work apron.

As I walked back out to the front tying the back of the apron, my gaze, naturally dropped to the floor. I stopped just a hair's breadth away from smacking into Patty. She had a look on her face that went beyond a scowl. It was a harsh glare I'd never seen before.

"I really am sorry about being late."

"You knew I liked him." Her abrupt tone was unfamiliar. Even when Patty was mad about something, she never spoke sharply.

"I'm confused. Are we still talking about me not opening the store on time?"

"You knew I liked him, but you spent the whole day in the fountain, shaking your boobs and flirting like a slut, just like you did in high school."

Her hurtful words were so unexpected, they sent me back a few steps as if someone had just pummeled me with a blast of hot air. I was rendered speechless. There just wasn't any way to respond to an unexpected verbal assault from someone you considered a close friend.

"And then the kiss," she continued. "Everyone saw it but then we all know how you are." With that final barrage of bullets, Patty turned sharply on her heels and walked away.

I caught my breath and followed her.

"That first day, I gave you a chance to go out and talk to him. I handed you the water bottle, and you refused it." I reached the counter as she circled around behind it, putting a solid barrier between us. But it wasn't enough to stop the flow of anger coming from her direction.

"Wasn't that generous of you. You knew darn well that I couldn't walk out there and talk to him."

I held out my hands. "And that's my fault? Take the damn pills the doctor gave you, Patty. Maybe then you can join the world again."

She pointed at me. "Don't you dare bring up my issues. This is on you, you and your unquenchable appetite for boys. I thought you grew up after high school, but I can see I was wrong."

"Patty, you built this wall around your world, and you're the only one who can break it open. That's up to you and only you."

"Well, it must be nice to have no inhibitions at all, where you can just stand in the middle of the town square and kiss a complete stranger. People are already talking."

"Let them talk. And he's not a stranger, at least not to me." I blinked back tears and stared at her for a long time. I'd intended for my voice to come out brisk and angry, but the words that came out were weak and shaky. "We all dealt with our grief in different ways. I won't bring up your issues, if you don't bring up mine. I lost someone too, Patty. Everyone in town lost someone, one way or another, but I'm the only person in town who has to withstand secret glances and withering stares from people who are thinking 'why did you survive when my child didn't'. Try living with that sharp edge of the tragedy for just one day, Patty. I know you've thought the same thing. Why Sheila and not Ella. Everyone thinks it. Me most of all."

Patty's tears were rolling nearly as fast as mine.

The clang of the cowbell startled us from the intense moment.

"Morning Star—" Fynn stopped short when he saw my face. "Ella, is everything all right?"

Patty dashed out from behind the counter and stomped to the backroom.

The expression of concern on Fynn's face only made the tears fall faster. "Ella?"

I took hold of his hand and led him out of the store and around the corner. I fell against him and he wrapped his arms around me. "Sometimes, Fynn, I just wish the world would stop spinning enough for me to step off."

He didn't ask any questions. He just held me until the tears stopped.