Holding Sebastian tight within the circle of his arms, Logan's heart and mind were racing. He'd spent so many years never putting his feelings into words, and now he was floundering, inarticulate in the face of everything he could suddenly say and how few words he had to say it in. The words hadn't seemed important when there was no way he would ever get to say any of them out loud – and he hardly dared to think them within the privacy of his own head – and now they were overwhelmed by the reality of Sebastian's body pressed close against him. Close enough to breathe in each other's air, the new shape of Sebastian's body was as obvious as a smack in the face, a reminder that there was more between them than Logan's desperate and unformed emotions.

Sebastian leaned back, looking up into Logan's eyes, and Logan braced himself for more explanations he still didn't know how to make.

Instead, Sebastian kissed him, his mouth hot and demanding, his hand firm against the back of Logan's neck as he pulled him down. Logan's hands squeezed tight against the back of Sebastian's shirt, one sliding up and into Sebastian's hair, cupped gently around the curve of his skull. Sebastian groaned faintly against Logan's mouth, pushing up towards him as though they weren't tangled awkwardly around each other, Logan still kneeling on the floor, Sebastian still sitting on Logan's shitty couch, edging closer towards toppling over with every inch he moved into Logan's space.

"You're going to fall," Logan murmured softly between kisses, his arms tight around Sebastian's body.

"Am I?" Sebastian laughed, a lightness in his voice that Logan didn't think he'd heard in months. "Then you'd better get up here with me." He tugged on Logan's shirt as he dove in for another searing kiss, leaning back until it was Logan's turn to start overbalancing, his knees now barely on the floor as he tried to get as close to Sebastian as humanly possible.

"I–" he started and stuttered to a halt, words failing him yet again. The pounding of his blood in his ears felt like the physical expression of those feelings, demanding to be released only to be dammed up at the last moment by his uncooperative tongue.

"I missed you," Sebastian whispered, his head dropping to Logan's shoulder, and that was it, Logan was undone.

"I've been here," he said, urgency deepening his voice to a rumble as he pressed quick, demanding kisses along the line of Sebastian's neck. "Always."

"Have you?" There was almost a sob in Sebastian's voice, or was that his breath hitching as Logan's teeth scraped over the throb of his pulse?

"Forever," Logan said recklessly. He held Sebastian closer, calming his trembling hands. "Can't you feel it?"

Sebastian groaned, his lips against the sensitive skin where Logan's neck joined his shoulder, the sound tingling through his body. "Why don't you come up here and give it to me?"

"On the couch?" Logan murmured, kissing up along Sebastian's neck and behind his ear. Sebastian smelled like home and warmth and sex. Not the intense, overriding smell of a heat, but something more familiar, something that made Logan want to grab Sebastian up and never let him go.

"I just want you," Sebastian said, his shoulders shrugging fractionally where he was held tight against Logan's chest. "Just me, not the hormones, you know? And I've been wanting a long time. Now seems more important than where."

"Oh yeah?" Logan rose slowly to his feet, hands sliding down Sebastian's back to slip under his ass and scoop him right off the couch. Sebastian yelped, wrapping his legs around Logan's waist, his fingers digging into Logan's shoulders. "I've been waiting a long time too," he growled, a smile playing across his lips. "I can wait a moment more to do this right."

"Do this right?" Sebastian said. His eyebrow was raised but his snark was losing out to the shake in his voice and the roll of his hips where his hot dick pressed against Logan through their pants.

"It seems to me," Logan drawled, stepping away from the couch and towards his bedroom door, cradling Sebastian in his arms, "That you haven't been taking care of yourself."

"So I should let you handle it?" Sebastian gasped as he rolled his hips forward again.

"Glad we agree," Logan replied. He grinned into Sebastian's neck, the skin there soft against his lips.

Sebastian shivered and pressed closer. "Take care of this," he murmured, voice catching as he thrust once more against Logan.

The reality of Sebastian finally being demanding, finally asking Logan for all the things that Logan wanted to give him was almost too much. Logan swayed his way towards the bed, dizzy with joy. His mind raced overtime towards all the possibilities of tonight and stopped short as he lowered Sebastian onto the bed and watched the love of his life stretch out before him, looking up at him with dark and hungry eyes.

"What are you waiting for?" Sebastian said, pushing himself up on his elbow to strip his sweater off over his head and stare Logan down.

Not that Logan was looking at his face. He'd been watching the slow changes in Sebastian's body for what seemed like eternity, keeping track of the change in his hips and the curve of his stomach, but those had all been muffled by the clothes under which Sebastian had been trying to conceal himself, only visible to his careful eye and the work of his imagination.

Now it was all laid out in front of him: the gentle curve of Sebastian's growing belly on his slim body, the new angles of his hips, the smoothness of his newly-bared skin, and of course, the erection pressing painfully against the fly of his jeans.

Sebastian reached down to unzip his pants, looking up at Logan with a challenging stare in his eye. "Admiring your handiwork?"

"Admiring you," Logan corrected him, still drinking in the view before him as though he'd found an oasis in the desert. He shucked off his shirt as Sebastian slipped his pants off his hips, crawling onto the bed to cover Sebastian's body with his own.

"I'm going to need more than admiration here," Sebastian said, spreading his thighs around Logan's hips and pushing up against him.

"Anything you want," Logan promised. "Anything you need." Sebastian's hands trailed over his chest, the scrape of his nails sending shockwaves down Logan's spine. He bent to capture Sebastian's lips with his own, devouring and hungry, trying to put his desire to give Sebastian anything in the world into that one fervent kiss.

Whether or not the message was received, Sebastian was flushed and panting as they broke the kiss. His chest heaved as Logan kissed his way down his neck, his blush stretching down towards his hard, pink nipples. Under Logan's lips, Sebastian's skin was hot and smooth, the faintest hint of salt on Logan's tongue as he flicked it over the smooth planes of Sebastian's chest and the firm nubs of his nipples, reveling in the noises coming out of Sebastian's mouth.

He moved down further, one hand feeling out the supple curves of Sebastian's belly, the width of his shoulders pushing Sebastian's thighs further and further apart.

"Haven't you gotten enough of it already?" Sebastian said, voice shaky, as Logan kissed his stomach, long and lingering.

Logan lifted his head just a fraction, his chin still resting just above Sebastian's navel. "Never." Sebastian laughed faintly. "You're beautiful."

"I'm frustrated," Sebastian corrected him, curling his leg over Logan's back, his jeans still tangled around one ankle.

"I'll look after you," Logan promised, dipping his head again to flick his tongue in and out of Sebastian's navel, kissing along the changed curve of his hip to where Sebastian's dick rose from the dark mass of his pubes, flushed and wet. Sebastian's thighs began to tremble as though he could feel the heat of Logan's gaze on him, a bead of moisture forming at the head of his cock.

Logan kissed Sebastian's inner thighs long and slow, mouthed at his balls, and finally – when Sebastian began to swear brokenly above him – slid Sebastian's cock into his mouth. He sucked slow and deep, feeling out the weight of it in his mouth as he ran his hands eagerly over the changed curves of Sebastian's hips, spreading Sebastian's thighs and pushing them up over his shoulders. There was a faint fuzziness to his memories of Sebastian's body from before, the lingering effects of pheromone drugging and hormones, and Logan wanted these new memories to be crystal clear, a perfect image to hold forever in his mind.

It wasn't only the lines of Sebastian's body that had changed. The scent of him as Logan inhaled, the tang of him on Logan's tongue were all faintly different, not only perfumed with sex and lust and want but something that made Logan want to beat his chest and announce to the whole world that Sebastian was his, luxuriating in the knowledge that his possession was stamped on Sebastian's skin just as solidly as the child growing in Sebastian's belly.

Saliva filled his mouth and Logan swallowed around Sebastian's cock, letting Sebastian thrust deeper inside him, the head of his cock bumping against the back of Logan's throat. He inhaled again, his own arousal clouding his brain and making his hips jerk against the bed. Sebastian was almost screaming now, his cries of encouragement melting into one long, continuous noise as Logan curled his tongue around Sebastian's shaft. His thighs were shaking again, squeezing tight around Logan's ears and jerking apart just as quickly, and Logan shut his eyes to capture the moment as Sebastian came with a cry, his hips moving frantically as he pulsed hot down Logan's throat.

Logan pulled off tortuously slowly, letting his lips trail over the hot flesh of Sebastian's dick, his tongue flicking out to capture every drop of liquid that still ran down the shaft. Sebastian's hands were fisted tight in the blankets, his cries of pleasure resolving into gasps as Logan tortured his sensitive cock.

"Please," he said finally, voice breaking. "It's too much. Please."

Logan kissed the head of Sebastian's cock long and luxuriantly before replying, drinking in the noises Sebastian made. "Feel good?" he murmured at last, his lips just barely touching the stiff length.

"Oh god," Sebastian moaned. "Yes! But it's too much–" He stopped with a gasp and started again. "I can't–"

"Okay." Logan dipped his head again, kissing Sebastian's thighs. There were red marks where Sebastian had shoved against his hands moments earlier and Logan let himself lavish his care on those. He wanted to give Sebastian everything, all at once, to make up for months of frustration in a single instant. Sebastian groaned at his touch, but didn't stop him and Logan slid lower, pushing Sebastian's thighs as far open as they could go, which was further than he'd thought. A thrill ran through him at the thought and he nipped at Sebastian's thigh, delighting in the toothmark he left there.

Sebastian twitched in pleasure-pain again as Logan flicked his tongue over Sebastian's balls, but he stilled as Logan let himself trail even further down. Now he was lapping at Sebastian's hole, Sebastian's legs tense under Logan's hands as he let himself open up under the pressure, his breathing changing to a high whine that seemed to shake the both of them.

Everything in Logan was telling him to push forward, that being inside Sebastian was all that he'd wanted for so long, but he held himself back, letting Sebastian get used to the push of his tongue, the curl of it as it flicked over the trembling rim. This was his chance to give Sebastian the care that the urgencies of heat had denied them both and he was going to make the most of it, letting it take as long as it took.

Whimpering, Sebastian pressed back against Logan's mouth, letting Logan's tongue probe deeper, thrust harder into the tight recesses of his body. Every second seemed to open him up further, the rock of their bodies thumping the headboard against the wall in a pounding counterpoint to the thud of blood in Logan's veins.

"More," Sebastian groaned, his hips rolling under Logan's hands. "Just fuck me." Logan thrust his tongue harder, but Sebastian continued to beg, his ass flexing and shifting as he tried harder and harder to get the friction he needed.

He was wet with spit and sweat when Logan slid a finger inside him, stretching with ease as Logan pushed himself up onto his knees and opened his pants, his dick pushing its way vigorously from his zipper. He shoved his pants down no further than he needed to, made desperate by the feel of Sebastian spread out under his hands and the noises issuing from Sebastian's throat, and lined himself up to fuck Sebastian to within an inch of his life.

The rim of Sebastian's hole caught for a second on the blunt head of Logan's dick, but with a sharp gasp they were past that and Logan was sliding in easily, feeling Sebastian tight around him, their bodies thrumming in unison with energy and desire. Here, it was easy to give Sebastian what he wanted, what he needed. He said it all aloud, from the whine in the back of his throat to the way he rocked his hips down onto Logan's cock, filling himself up until his ass was nestled tight against Logan's groin and the two of them were moving together, faster and faster.

This was what Logan had needed too, everything he'd been denying himself and more. He held Sebastian's hips as he thrust, sweat beading on his forehead as he tried to keep up with Sebastian's insatiable rhythm. Sebastian was hard again too, his dick bobbing between them, smearing wetness across their stomachs and making Sebastian groan yet again. It was too much and not enough all at once and Logan could have stayed there in that moment forever, except that his orgasm was creeping up on him, pushing him to thrust harder, his hips rolling furiously, his breath staccato in his chest.

He felt Sebastian spurt wetly across them both as he came, his hips jittering to a stop thrust deep inside his love's body. Logan groaned as he pulled out, overwhelmed by emotion and effort in nearly equal measures.

Sebastian grinned up at him.

"How you feeling?" Logan rasped, admiring the mess that Sebastian had made over himself and the red, swollen cherry of his lips.

"Very good," Sebastian groaned, lying back against the pillows with a look of pure satisfaction written all over his flushed face.

It was all Logan had ever wanted and he was sure that he looked unforgivably smug as he arranged himself by Sebastian's side, curling protectively around the other man and relaxing into total sexual satisfaction. He felt better than he'd ever felt before. That didn't mean he knew what to say now, but he cared a lot less, leaning back against his pillows and letting the endorphins trickle through him like a shower of sparks.

Finally, his whole body melting into pure relaxation, Logan thought he knew what he needed to say. It was so simple, he should have been saying it all along, he thought. Though whether Sebastian would have been able to hear it was a different story. He looked down into Sebastian's peaceful face, letting himself dream again.

"I'm going to look after you," Logan whispered, but Sebastian was already asleep, one arm curled loosely around Logan's arm as though he thought Logan might run off while he dreamed. It wasn't likely, but Logan couldn't blame Sebastian from wondering when Logan could barely manage to speak his feelings aloud.