When I resurface from the memory, I’m on the floor. Beira’s holding me in her arms, her eyes filled with worry. So unlike her.

“What happened?” she asks. Of course, she doesn’t know. For them, it’s just a hand. A bloody hand where you can see the bone sticking out on one end. But the tattoo around the wrist gives it away. A bracelet of delicate hearts that mum got tattooed when she adopted me. There’s no doubt that it’s her. Even without the tattoo, the thick red marks on her skin tell of the fiery rope she was bound with.

“She’s dead,” I whisper, my words making it even more real.

“Are you sure?” Gwain asks from behind my mother. “They could have… taken the hand while she was still alive.”

“She’s dead,” I repeat. “I saw it, I felt it.”

“But why?” Gwain starts walking up and down the room. “There was no demand, no threat. Why kill a hostage without warning?”

I hate how logical he’s thinking. Why isn’t everyone crying along with me. Wait. Am I crying? I gingerly touch my cheeks. No tears.

I’m not crying over my mum’s death.

I should be a wreck, crying my eyes out, but instead, I get up and look at the arm again. I’m cold, clinical. Ice is starting to rise up in me, covering my heart. It’s necessary. I need to rise up to be the person I was born to be.

The Winter Heiress.

Cold. Emotionless. A true ruler.

I get up and one last time, I confirm what I already know. Yes, it’s my mum’s hand. She’s dead.

Next step.

“Search the man who brought this here,” I tell Ada. “Maybe he had a message for us that the guards didn’t see.”

“Princess…” she starts but one cold look from me shuts her up. She gives me a sharp salute and leaves.

“Gwain, retrace the man’s route. If he’s come from the Morrigan, maybe we can find her through him.”

I know that chance is miniscule, the Goddess of War would know better. But no matter how small the chance, we still need to find out.

“Yes, ma’am.” The old Guardian salutes me, but his expression is one of sadness. He knows things have changed. And he also knows they’ll never be as they were before.

I feel the ice harden around my heart as I turn to my Guardians. I hate what I’m about to do.

“Crispin, write down all you know about the Morrigan. Any weaknesses, any strengths you think are important. Then write down what you think isn’t important.”

It’s going to hurt. He’s not ready yet to put his past into words. He just about managed to show me. But for him to actually write about it, word by word… it’s going to break him. The cracks in his soul will widen and break and it will be my task to put him back together again. If I am still able to by then.

I am getting colder by the minute. The bond I feel with my Guardians is slowly freezing. I can’t think of them as mine. They are tools that I need to use to find the Morrigan. And then to kill her. Only once that is done can I let my heart thaw again.

By then, it might be too late for us.

“Wynter, you need to stop.”

My mother is looking at me strangely, almost as if she’s worried. She should be proud of me right now. I’m trying to be like her. It’s killing me inside but it’s necessary. She’s herself is the best example that it’s possible to shut out the world, to be cold to everyone around you.

“Arc. If it was the Morrigan who put the spell on the dragon’s mind, can you somehow follow it back? Find out more about her and why she did it?”

“I dinnae think so and it could hurt the prisoner, but…”

“Do it. I don’t care if it hurts him.”

I turn to Storm, but before I can say something, he speaks.

“Wyn, you are not yourself right now. You’ve just lost your mother, you’re grieving.” He takes a step towards me but I instinctively move away from him. I don’t want him to get too close. He sighs as he notices that I’m not going to fall into his arms as he’d probably hoped. “You just told Arc to hurt a prisoner. That’s not you. You need to take a break, you—”

“And what good will that do?” I snarl, frustrated that he can’t see the idiocy of his request. “She has my father, she is threatening us all. We need to do something now, not later. There is no time to rest. We still don’t know what she wants. There is so much to do, why can’t you see that?!” I shout the last sentence, shocking the room into silence.

I ignore them all and walk out of the room, then break into a run. I can’t be inside, I need air. I run up the stairs, ignoring the magic that could transport me up a lot quicker than my legs can. There are people following me, probably my Guardians, but I don’t wait for them.

When I reach the top of the tower, I don’t stop running and jump into the air, my wings expanding immediately. I fly, soaring on the icy wind, driving all thoughts and emotions from my mind. All I can feel is the elation of the flight, the cold wind on my cheeks, the little ice crystals forming on my skin.

I fold my wings close to my back and dive down, towards the snowy landscape before. There are some moving shapes below, snow hares maybe?

I follow them as they race over the frozen ground. Yes, it’s hares, jumping fast from one snow drift to the next. I watch them, amazed at their speed and agility. They’re so free…

Suddenly, there’s a tree in front of me and I swerve to the side, almost crashing into it. Watch where you’re flying, Wyn. I can’t believe I let myself be distracted by bunnies. But at least I managed to think of something else than death and destruction. The cold air has helped clear my head a little.

I manage to land, not very elegantly but at least I didn’t fall. This place looks familiar. That tree…

Oh no.

“Are you here for more sparklies?” Blaze’s melodious voice makes me swirl around. The unicorn is blending into the white landscape around us, its silver fur shimmering in the sun.

“Yes. I think I am.” I offer him a grim smile. “Give me the strongest stuff you’ve got.”