MATT REALISED HE must have slept for a few minutes because when he opened his eyes, Joanna was on her feet, her swimsuit restored, bending over him.
She had evidently been shaking him, and when his eyes opened, she murmured softly, ‘Someone’s calling you. You’d better get dressed.’
Matt was inclined to say he didn’t much care, but it was obvious Joanna didn’t want the embarrassment of one of his staff finding him in the nude.
‘Who is it?’ he asked, pushing himself up into a sitting position and reaching for his shorts. ‘Henry?’
‘No, I think it’s Teresa,’ replied Joanna in a low voice. ‘She’s probably wondering where you’ve gone.’
He pulled on his shorts and picked up his discarded polo shirt, which Joanna must have collected from further down the beach. The fabric clung to his still damp body, and Joanna thought it was as sexy in its way as his bare skin.
Her tongue circling her upper lip, she said nervously, ‘Are you all right?’
‘I guess so. Are you?’
It was a simple question, but Joanna didn’t have an answer. Yes, she was okay; yes, she’d loved making love with him; but God knew where they went from here.
‘I think so,’ she said finally, reaching for her wrap and draping it about her shoulders. ‘I suppose I should be getting back to the cottage.’
Matt shrugged, but his face had tightened, and she couldn’t help feeling anxious. Was he already regretting what they’d done? Whatever she was feeling, it wasn’t regret, she acknowledged honestly. But she had never felt more apprehensive in her life.
Before Matt could say anything more, however, Teresa appeared on the jetty. Her dark face was concerned, but when she saw Joanna and Matt together, her lips parted in a wide smile.
‘Oh, there you are, Mrs Novak,’ she exclaimed with evident relief. ‘We were so worried about you, weren’t we, Mr Matt? My granddaughter didn’t know where you’d gone.’
‘I’m sorry—’ began Joanna, but before she could continue, Matt intervened.
‘Mrs Novak decided to take a swim,’ he said, making no mention of his part in bringing her back to shore. ‘Perhaps you’d apologise to Callie. I’m sure my—Joanna—regrets not informing you what she was planning to do.’
Matt wasn’t looking at her and she smiled at the housekeeper instead. ‘That’s right,’ she said. ‘It was a little foolish.’ It was easier to admit her mistake. ‘But it was such a lovely morning and I haven’t had a swim since I arrived.’
Teresa frowned. ‘You could always use the pool,’ she said, looking at Matt, but he didn’t say anything. ‘Oh, well,’ she continued, purposely cheerful. ‘No harm done.’
Her eyes lingered for a moment on Joanna’s belly, and Joanna assured herself that Teresa couldn’t possibly know what had been going on. She was sure her hair was mussed and there was probably sand coating her thighs. But hopefully the housekeeper would assume she’d been sitting on the beach after her swim and not indulging in hot, sweaty sex.
Now, Teresa glanced back towards the villa, and said, ‘Anyway, I’d better get back to my kitchen. With visitors coming this afternoon—’ She pulled a wry face. ‘There’s still quite a lot to do.’
Offering another polite smile, she hurried away, and Joanna bent to pick up her towel. Shaking it free of sand, she said curiously, ‘Visitors? I didn’t know you were expecting company.’
Matt shrugged. ‘I doubt if you’ll be pleased to hear who it is.’
Joanna waited for him to go on, but he didn’t. She thought she could guess the identity of his visitors after what he’d just said, but it was hard not to feel excluded from his life.
Gathering her belongings, she avoided his eyes as she said, ‘Well, give your parents my best, won’t you? Particularly your father. Tell him he’s welcome to come to the cottage any time.’
‘Okay.’ Matt blew out a breath. ‘I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.’
‘Will you have time for me, now that you’ve got visitors?’ Joanna asked, aware that she sounded resentful. ‘I doubt if your mother will want to see me again.’
Matt heaved a sigh. ‘My mother coming here has nothing to do with us. What happened, happened, Jo. You know it and I know it. You wanted me, and you’re pretty good at getting your own way.’
Joanna felt sick. ‘Well, at least I know where I stand,’ she said stiffly, bundling the towel about her. ‘I know I don’t look very appealing at the moment, but I could do without you making me feel like a desperate housewife!’
That hadn’t been his intention, and now Matt felt guilty. ‘It wasn’t a criticism,’ he muttered gruffly. ‘But for pity’s sake, Jo, you need to decide what it is you want from me.’
With an effort, Joanna managed to stem the tears that burned behind her eyes. ‘Go and get ready for your guests. I’m sure they’ll be better company than I am.’
‘I doubt it.’ Matt’s tone was gentler now. ‘My mother thought the trip would give my father something to think about besides his health.’
‘Oh—’ Joanna pressed a hand to her throat. ‘But they do know I’m staying here?’
‘They know,’ agreed Matt, picking up her wrap and removing the towel to drape the silk shawl over her shoulders. He was tempted to bend his head and kiss the soft curve of her nape, but he restrained himself. His eyes darkened with some concern. ‘You are okay? I mean with what just happened. I didn’t hurt you?’
‘No, you didn’t hurt me,’ she replied, although the ache in her heart told a different tale, but she couldn’t let him see how she really felt.
Matt heaved a breath and glanced back towards the villa. He wasn’t proud of what he’d done, particularly after he’d promised himself this wouldn’t happen again. Yet here he was, having just enjoyed the most delightful sex of his life and he was looking for reasons to blame her for his weakness.
Dammit, why did Joanna have to be so sexy? Even in her present condition, he’d never wanted any other woman. Was that why his attraction to her was so addictive? Because his feelings towards her couldn’t be replaced? He had the feeling he wouldn’t like the answer. It had always been that way with her.
‘So,’ he said, trying to defuse the situation. ‘So long as you’re okay, I’d better be getting back.’ He glanced down at his legs, which, like hers, were coated with sand. ‘I need a shower and I’m sure you do, too.’ He paused. ‘If Henry’s home, I’ll get him to drive you back to the cottage. It will save you walking so far in this heat.’
‘I’d prefer to walk,’ declared Joanna at once, even though her legs still felt like jelly. Her lips twisted. ‘Give your mother my regards, won’t you? I’m sure she’ll appreciate the irony.’
‘Jo!’
But she didn’t stop, and Matt decided it wouldn’t be wise to go after her. He needed time—hell, they both needed time—to come to terms with what came next.
* * *
When she got back to the cottage, the first thing Joanna did was run herself a bath.
Her legs were covered in sand, yes, and she didn’t like the gritty feeling on her skin. But despite what she’d told Matt, her back was aching, and she felt a warm bath might ease the stiffness in her bones.
Callie knocked on the door as Joanna was drying herself. ‘Would you like an iced tea, Mrs Novak?’ she asked, with a certain amount of diffidence. She was evidently feeling guilty for causing such a panic over Joanna’s disappearance.
Joanna sighed, wrapping the huge bath towel around her and opening the door. ‘That sounds good,’ she said, earning a relieved smile from the young woman waiting outside. ‘Sorry if I worried you earlier. I’ll be out in about ten minutes.’
Deciding it was too warm, even for shorts, Joanna slipped a loose cotton caftan over her head. The ankle-length dress, patterned in shades of green and apricot, was cool and comfortable. She’d bought it at a boutique on one of her trips to town. Typical tourist wear.
She’d washed her hair, too, and she left it loose about her shoulders. She didn’t expect to see anyone, other than the two women who worked at the cottage. She was sure Matt would have his hands full if his parents were coming to stay.
It was a day for relaxing, she decided, as though most days didn’t fall into that category anyway. Maybe it would be a good day to check up on what was happening in the rest of the world.
With that purpose in mind, she carried the worn leather case containing her father’s old laptop out onto the veranda, where Callie had left her a tray of iced tea and a dish of newly baked muffins. She was going to be horribly fat when this was over, she thought ruefully, taking one of the muffins and biting into the rich fruity filling. She doubted David would appreciate his new partner looking like a blimp.
Thinking of David reminded her that after the baby was born, she’d be going back to London. It was no longer an appealing prospect, but after today she was only fooling herself if she thought that Matt was going to change his mind about her. She could feel the baby moving energetically inside her. A particularly sharp kick, just below her ribcage, had her wincing at the unexpected blow. Was Matt’s son exacting the revenge his father was denied?
Finishing her muffin, Joanna drank some of the iced tea and then set her glass aside. Pulling the laptop towards her, she unzipped the case and pulled out the old computer. She didn’t know why she bothered putting it in its case really. It was hardly in pristine condition.
The last time she’d used it, she’d scanned some of her father’s old emails. She’d hoped she might find something about the accident and what his reaction had been. But Angus had evidently kept his business correspondence in an encrypted folder, and she didn’t have the password, or there was nothing about the case to find.
The only anomaly, which she’d just read the evening before, was an email from a betting website. It was a demand for money, informing her father that he was several hundred pounds in the red. Obviously, whoever had sent the email didn’t know Angus had died, and, knowing what her father had always thought about gambling, she ignored it. She had intended to mention it to Matt the next time she saw him. But after this morning’s episode, that might be some distance in the future.
She pulled the computer out of its case, as usual, but this time a worn scrap of paper fell to the floor. Bending to pick it up, she saw it was a letter. And judging by its shabby appearance, it was probably older than the computer itself.
Frowning, she unfolded the page, wondering how long it had been there. It must have been lodged in one of the compartments, and because there were so many tears in the paper it was written on, it hadn’t dropped out straight away. Back in London, she used the computer at the gallery to do her work, and it was only since she’d been here that it had been of any use.
The letter she’d rescued was dated June 1980, and Joanna whistled through her teeth. Goodness—that was almost forty years ago. Why on earth would her father keep a letter that long? Surely it must have been written while he was still at university?
Was the letter from her mother? It started Darling Angus and that was a very intimate form of address. Turning the page, Joanna looked for her mother’s signature. But instead it read Much love, Adrienne.
Adrienne!
The address was Girton College, Cambridge. Girton! Her mother had attended one of the London universities. Had her father been involved with this woman before he and Glenys had got together? Had her mother known about this other woman in her father’s life?
Joanna frowned, turning back to the front of the letter and reading the address again. Whoever had written it had been a student at Girton College. Her father had been at Trinity College, Cambridge, but that was all she knew.
She felt a little guilty, reading a letter that had so obviously been addressed to her father. But, as with the emails, it couldn’t hurt him now. Besides, she was only human. And she was curious.
Reading on, she frowned in concentration.
Darling Angus,
It isn’t easy for me to write this letter, my dear, but I’m afraid I can’t see you again. We’ve had some wonderful times together, and I’m going to miss you, terribly. But you must have realised, as I did, that it couldn’t go on for ever, I’m going back to the States to marry Oliver—
Joanna broke off, her jaw dropping. Oliver! Was this letter from Adrienne Novak? she wondered incredulously. Although of course, Adrienne’s surname hadn’t been Novak in those days.
She read on.
It will make all the difference to my family. He’s promised to help Daddy financially, and you know I could never live on a shoestring, my dear. I’m returning to New York at the end of the week. But before I left I wanted to wish you every happiness for the future. I’m sure you and Glenys—
Joanna’s jaw dropped. She couldn’t help it. It was one thing to speculate if her father had had an affair and quite another to have it confirmed.
—will get married as you originally intended. I don’t think either of us took our relationship seriously. I know I didn’t. We’re two different people, Angus. It’s been fun while it lasted, but like all good things it must sadly come to an end.
Much love...
Joanna was stunned. The tone of the letter really irritated her. She wondered if her father and mother had been engaged at the time. If they had, this was such a betrayal. She doubted her mother knew anything about it, and it certainly showed Angus’s outrage at his wife’s departure for the hypocrisy it had been.
She wondered why her father had kept the letter for so many years. Had he had some intention of using it for his own ends? Why else would he have kept it, unless he’d had some ulterior motive for doing so? Which undoubtedly cast a shadow over other things he’d done.
Was that why Adrienne had always hated her? Had she been afraid that Angus might tell Oliver about their affair? It must have been a bitter irony that her son should have fallen in love with Angus’s daughter. No wonder she’d tried her best to keep them apart.
Did it also explain why her father had been so willing to merge his company with NovCo? And why, initially, he hadn’t opposed her marriage to Matt? The accident had brought things to a head, of course, and he’d involved her in it. But could the accusations Angus had made against Matt and his father now be seen in a different light?