37
Ben threw me to the ground and I fell on my sore shoulder. This time the pain was so severe I wasn’t able to cry out, and it took all my strength not to pass out.
I’d landed flat on my stomach and rested my head on the floor, willing the room to stop spinning. I saw that one of the metal pieces from the shelves had come free and lay about two feet from me.
I heard Ben take a step toward me and inhaled a shuddering breath. I had to stay conscious.
“Ben,” I said, my voice sounding weak. “Think about what you’re doing.” I tried to drag myself forward, closer to the metal frame, but only moved half a foot if I was lucky.
“I’ve thought about you so much, Lena. I’m sick of thinking.”
I swallowed down the fear and focused hard on the piece of metal. “No, I mean, think about your career. Think about what you’re throwing away.”
Where was Marc? Why couldn’t I hear him anymore?
“My career? You’re the star, Lena. Haven’t you figured that out? My light will shine and then fade, but you’re the real deal. I can’t compete with that.”
“You can! Ben, you can. You’re so talented. You must see that. Once this movie comes out, you’re going to be in high demand, you’ll see. Don’t ruin this fantastic chance you have.” I dragged myself across the floor another half foot.
Ben didn’t seem to notice or care. “What chance? You ruined any chance I had the minute I locked myself in this room with you. All you had to do was admit you love me and everything would have been fine.”
“I do love you, Ben, I—”
“Liar!”
I jolted at his shout and felt, rather than saw, Ben close the distance between us. As he reached down to scoop me up I lunged for the piece of metal. At the same time, the sound of gunshots slamming into the door rang out. It was all the distraction I needed to twist painfully in Ben’s arms and bring the piece of metal down on his head. It made a sickening thud as it connected with the top of his skull and he let go of me, his eyes wide with shock. I fell to the ground and saw him do the same, but I wasn’t taking any chances. I scrambled backward to the far wall and that was how Marc, Kaden and Jay found me—shaking uncontrollably, the cold concrete against my back as I watched blood pool around Ben’s head.
Then I passed out.
*
I didn’t argue about being taken to the hospital this time. I was in and out of consciousness anyway. I was vaguely aware I had concussion and there were moments I was lucid enough to catch what was going on.
Marc’s bloodshot eyes. Ally holding my hand in the back of the ambulance. Jay’s deep voice. Jacob’s concerned whispers. I didn’t fight the lapses because I knew I was safe. I knew it was finally over.
The only words I managed to utter as my stretcher was wheeled from the ambulance were, “Ben? Dead?”
Ally gripped my hand tightly and kissed my forehead. “No. He’s going to live.”
After that, I succumbed to the pain and welcomed the oblivion.
*
The sound of deep voices was the first thing I heard, but I couldn’t open my eyelids. They were too heavy.
“There’s no question he’ll be charged with multiple offenses. He won’t come near her again.”
It felt like I was surrounded by fog and I fought hard to identify the voice. Kaden. It was Aaron.
“I know that. It doesn’t make it any better.”
Relief settled over me when I heard Marc’s hushed voice.
“Stop beating yourself up,” said Kaden.
“I almost lost her.”
“But you didn’t.”
“It’s my fault she’s in here.”
“No, Marc, it’s no one’s fault except that sick kid’s, you got that?”
“He had a history. I knew, damn it. I knew.”
“What? So the kid was a pyromaniac when he was a teenager? Sure, you knew there was a link, but Campbell made sense.”
“I fucked up. I had a piece of information that I disregarded.”
“No, you didn’t. We’ve been through this.”
I thought I heard footsteps, like someone was pacing.
“Then I should have warned her.”
“And what? Have her eyeing her co-star with fear? We all made the right call on that one, trust me . . .”
There was a long pause.
“That’s the problem. After all this, I’m not sure who to trust anymore.”
I tried to hold onto the voices but they slipped away and I disappeared somewhere else.
*
When I awoke properly, I didn’t remember my hazy dream and Ally’s worried brown eyes met mine.
“Lena. Hi.”
I managed a tired smile. “Hi. I’m in the hospital, right?”
“Right.”
“I hate hospitals.”
She reached over and rubbed my arm. “I know.”
“Am I OK?”
“Yes. The scans confirm it’s only concussion. No major damage.”
“Scans?”
“Yeah. You don’t remember?”
“Maybe.” I had a vague recollection of being pushed somewhere on the stretcher for tests but it felt like it had happened to someone else. “How long have I got to be here for?”
“Ask the doctors, but I think if everything’s OK they’ll release you the day after tomorrow.”
“Good.”
We sat in silence for a while, which was so unlike Ally I knew it must have been bad.
“Where is he?” I asked.
“Who? Marc?”
“No. Ben.”
Ally’s eye’s pooled with tears. “I don’t know. He could be dead for all I care.”
“But he’s not?”
Ally pouted. “No. He’ll be OK. You should have hit him harder.” She wiped the tears from her cheeks. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean that, I’m just so, so . . . ”
I grabbed her hand and squeezed. “I know. Me too.”
We fell quiet again, until I let out a sigh. “I can’t go home.”
“Yet,” said Ally, “but in a day or two—”
“No. I’m not going back there.”
Ally’s face fell. “Oh. Of course not. You can come to my—”
“No, it’s OK. I’ll head back to Duncan’s estate, it’s big enough and I’ll sleep downstairs. Then I need to go see my father.”
“What?” Ally’s breath came out in a whoosh.
I gave her a sad smile, then explained the letter I had received before the party.
“Oh, Lena. I’m so sorry. Everything’s just so messed-up right now.”
“Hey, I’m alive. It could be worse.”
“Don’t say that!” She appeared horrified by my dark humor.
“Where’s Marc?”
Ally frowned and looked away. “I’m not sure. He should be back soon though.”
“What?”
Ally shook her head. “Nothing.”
“Ally.”
“No, it’s really nothing.”
“Allegra Valenti.”
She focused on her lap and when she met my eyes again they were worried. “He’s been acting really strange. But I think it was from seeing you like that.”
“What do you mean?”
Ally avoided my eyes again. “When they found you, and you passed out, he . . . he didn’t take it very well.”
“I don’t imagine he did.” I couldn’t begin to understand how horrible it must have been for him to come in and find me like that.
“No, I mean, he really didn’t take it well. He lost it.”
“How do you mean?”
Ally bit her lip. “He punched a wall. It was his cry that made me come running. He sounded like . . . like an injured animal or something. For a second I thought he was going to attack Ben, but he was already out cold, and Kaden had to drag Marc from the room. I’m pretty sure he had to have stitches on his hand.”
I closed my eyes. The poor man. “He served in Afghanistan.”
“What?”
I opened my eyes. I wouldn’t breach Marc’s confidence, but I knew Ally could be trusted. “He lost men there. Nearly lost his own life, too.”
Ally’s hand went to her mouth. “Oh, Lena. You need to talk to him. I think, I think he might be going through something, but I’m not sure.”
“It’s OK, I will. Everything will be alright.”
Ally dropped her hand and her eyes darted to the doorway. “Marc.”
I followed her gaze and the immediate sense of relief was replaced with a stab of fear.
The man standing in the doorway was Marc, but it didn’t look like him. It was rare to see him so unkempt. His shirt was creased and so were his trousers, but it was the lines I saw on his face that knotted my stomach.
He met my eyes then looked away. For the first time ever, I wondered where the calm, impassive mask he wore so easily had gone.
He didn’t say anything and Ally didn’t seem to know where to look. I put my hand to my cheek, something tugging at my memory. Deep voices. An earlier discussion that I couldn’t quite remember.
He met my eyes again and in his anguished expression I saw it.
“You knew,” I accused. “You knew, and you lied to me.”