Chapter Eleven
Rae sat in the hot tub on the deck of the love nest she’d shared with Nate for almost a week now. Of course, they hadn’t shared love here so much as they’d enjoyed an incredible physical hunger for each other. Still, the place had become a home of sorts. She’d eaten meals with him, even lain in bed to watch a movie on the television. She’d slept in the warmth of his body. Kept her toothbrush next to his in the bathroom. Her hair dryer next to his shaving kit. All that was pretty intimate in a different way from having sex. It said they’d lived together. Maybe only for days, but he’d been part of her life.
She needn’t get maudlin about it. The arrangement had been temporary, and it would end soon. They’d court attention from other people at the party the next night. He hadn’t liked the idea, and honestly, she’d probably enjoy herself more hanging around with him. This wasn’t about fun. It was business. They only had one more day after that, so they were finished, anyway. She’d return to her work, and he’d do whatever he wanted to do with the rest of his life. She had more material for her column. She could thank him for that.
The moonlight caught the pearl Nate had given her. She’d set it on the edge of the hot tub rather than dunk it in chemical-laden water. The little orb seemed to glow on its own. She ran a fingertip over it. The necklace had probably cost him quite a bit. Why had he bought it? Sure, he had the money, but why would he get her something so personal? She’d wear it forever, and eventually she’d stop thinking of him when she put it on. That would take months, though. Maybe years.
She shouldn’t get sentimental about that, either.
On to the next and final phase of this trip. She and Nate would have to convince the world they weren’t a couple. They were just fuck buddies who’d taken a vacation together. Her identity as Désirée Knight demanded she remain single. Besides, she had no intention of getting involved with a man. Maybe they’d gotten too close. She couldn’t allow the article to focus too much on their relationship and too little on Eros’ Retreat. They had to remain at arm’s length emotionally, despite the great sex. He’d agreed. He’d said he wanted to help her. Fine, he could do it, and they’d part as friends.
“Here you are.” Nate was standing at the doorway wearing nothing but his pajama bottoms. With his hair rumpled and his sexy feet bare.
“Couldn’t sleep,” she said.
“That’s getting to be a habit.”
“I had things on my mind.” Last time, he’d given her sleepy sex. This time, thinking of him had kept her up. Not a good sign. Things had to end between them soon, anyway. They might as well start putting some distance between them now.
“Let me join you.”
“You don’t have to,” she said. “You can go back to sleep.”
“I didn’t say I was doing it for you.” He stripped out of his pajama bottoms and climbed into the tub. For a few seconds, she got a glimpse of his body before he lowered himself into the water. His cock wasn’t erect.
“Ahhh,” he said as he stretched his arms along the rim of the tub and settled down so only his neck and head appeared above the surface of the water. “We haven’t done this nearly enough.”
“That’s why I decided to tonight.”
“Is that the necklace I gave you?”
“Didn’t want to get it in the water. Chemicals.” She didn’t attempt to explain why she’d brought it out here at all when it could have stayed safe in its velvet box. Admitting she didn’t want to be parted from it wouldn’t do either of them any good.
Maudlin again. She seriously had to stop.
Neither of them spoke for a while. Finally, Nate stretched his arms over his head. “It’s been good, hasn’t it?”
“You know it has,” she answered.
“So, if our grand finale is tomorrow night, we might as well enjoy ourselves now.” He finally did put his arm around her and tug her against his side. “I don’t suppose you brought a condom with you.”
She nudged him in the ribs. “I wasn’t expecting you.”
“Pity.”
“Wait a minute.” She twisted out of his embrace and floated toward the other side of the tub where a table sat nearby. On it was a small box, and when she opened it, she found a collection of the telltale square packets. She held one up. “This place thinks of everything.”
He held out his arms. “Come back here.”
She did and ended up sitting across his lap. He immediately kissed her. Slow and sweet. No urgency, just a tender exploration. Still holding the condom, she ran her arms around his neck and kissed him back. She put all of herself into it, telling him in a way better than words that she didn’t want any man but him. What happened tomorrow night was for show. Reality lay here with the two of them.
After a bit, his hands went exploring. Cupping her breasts and toying with the nipples in the way that most excited her. Soon she returned to the world of sleepy sex with all her concentration on the water lapping around her and the way he made her feel. She was floating on currents of pleasure, and she arched her back to enjoy the total luxury.
“You act as though I’m the greatest lover in the world,” he said.
“Maybe you are.”
“You do know how to stoke a man’s ego.”
And she knew how to stoke something else. She reached down to find his cock. It had already stiffened. As she stroked it, it swelled against her palm.
He shifted to give her better access. “Oh yeah, just like that.”
If he thought she flattered him, she knew he did her. She pumped him, savoring the feel of his skin over the hardness beneath. The head was a special treat. Her very own toy, and she’d suck on it now if it weren’t under water. She did rub it with her thumb, and he rewarded her with a soft groan.
Nate was not one to receive and not give, so he slid his fingers between her thighs in search of her clitoris. When he found it, she gasped. Even after all their sex the strength of her response to him took her by surprise. Now she laid her head against his shoulder as they fondled each other. Not the hot and heavy sex they usually enjoyed, but oh so satisfying.
As usual, he’d bring her to the boiling point. It took a little longer this way, but that was just fine. The inevitable craving overtook her—the utter need to have his hardness inside her. So, she tore the packet open and rolled the condom over his erection.
Taking that as his cue, he lifted her so she could part her legs and then lowered her toward him. At the last moment, she grasped his shaft so she could guide him to her pussy. Then she slid down to face him as her body accepted his inside her.
For a moment, they gazed into each other’s eyes. Though not full, the moon gave her enough light to read his expression. Wonder at the perfection of their coupling. Wonder she shared.
“Nate,” she whispered.
“Shh. Don’t talk.” He kissed her, teasing her lips apart with his own. Again, she encircled him with her arms, holding him as close as she could possibly get him. But then, you didn’t get any closer than they were at that very moment. United in the most human of connections.
When he began to move, the familiar sensations rushed through her. She was soaring toward the sun, its heat warming her from the inside. Buoyed by the water, she easily raised herself up and then down again so she could slide along his length. On the next down stroke, she squeezed him with her muscles to see if he’d feel it.
“Whoa,” he said. “What’s that for?”
“To see if you like it.”
“Maybe too much. You’ll make me come.”
“Good.” Seriously, she was close herself, and the pressure teased her clit every time she did it. So she continued as he thrust harder and faster.
Oh, yes. This wouldn’t take long at all—for either of them. She closed her eyes to concentrate on her response. Just a little more and she’d reach the tipping point. Supersensitive now, her clit responded to every jostle. Every time he moved, she got closer and closer. Maybe this thrust. Or the next. Or…oh God…yes!
The climax burst over her like shattered moonlight. She cried out as all the air seemed to leave her lungs. Her muscles gripped him rhythmically, and in a second, he was coming with her. He also shouted as he gave her the last hard thrusts. They held on to each other through the storm and then settled into the soft lapping of the water. Her head on his shoulder, his face resting against hers.
Tomorrow their whole world would change. But even if all hell broke loose then, she had these moments with this man. They’d have to do.
…
Eros’ Retreat sure knew how to throw a party. Everything was set up for self-serve in the Barn, so the guests could help themselves without waitstaff, whose presence might put a damper on explicit goings on. After all, this was the resort’s “special place” where people could express themselves freely.
Tables around the room held drinks of all kinds and glassware galore. The usual—wine, beer, and assorted liquors and mixers. The resort had also supplied pitchers of its signature cocktail, Lemon Sin. Ice packed around the pitchers kept the drinks cold. A huge buffet table held food to keep the libido humming. Caviar, oysters on the half shell, cheeses, and cured hams. Plus little finger sandwiches and crudités for more delicate palates.
Rae sipped her cocktail as she made the rounds of the gathering. Circulate, circulate, circulate. She’d dressed for the part of sexy single lady in a low-cut dress of a silky sapphire material. It showed a bit of cleavage and a lot of leg, which she’d accentuated with heels high enough to make her hips swing when she walked. The seductive Latin music piped in on speakers set around the entire area made her feel as if she were dancing as she walked.
All in all, exactly what she’d hoped for, from the resort, the party, and herself. She was a single woman, definitely sexy, having fun without a man possessing her.
The rest of the crowd was having fun as well. The Baths was full of people laughing and drinking. One area nearby had become a dance floor where people gyrated in time with the music. One long-limbed woman had managed to twist herself into a pretzel so she could kiss one dance partner while rubbing her pelvis against another.
“Are you going to be writing about us?” a man’s voice said.
She turned to find a guy not more than a foot behind her. Now in front of her. He was just short enough to be staring at her boobs, which he did without trying to hide the fact.
“I’m writing about the resort. No one’s identity will be revealed.”
“We’re a pretty interesting group,” he said. His gaze still didn’t meet her face.
“I’ll say.”
“Where’s your date?” the man asked. “I thought you two were attached at the hip.”
Exactly the impression she’d hoped to avoid. “We’re not exactly a couple. More like friends with benefits.”
“If you ever have an opening in your lineup…” The man reached into his back pocket and produced a business card. “Let me know.”
“I will…” She glanced at the name. “Stu. Nice to meet you, but I have to mingle.”
“Sure thing.”
With no place else to put the card, she tucked it into the bodice of her dress. A good Désirée move.
She’d gotten a few more consents for interviews, including Cassandra and her husband. She could conduct them tomorrow. One more day here—one more day with Nate—and the whole adventure would end. It had been great while it lasted. Maybe they’d hook up again at some later point when it had become clear they weren’t in a relationship. Maybe not, too.
Where was he? She’d told him not to stay by her side but to circulate, as she was doing. If he’d done that, surely they would have bumped into each other by now. He wasn’t in the Baths nor on the dance floor. He might be in the Forum. It was pretty crowded in there.
He hadn’t taken her direction to stay distant from her and engage other people at all well. He seemed to want to be at her side constantly—something she couldn’t allow. She wasn’t going to do a bump and grind with some guy on the dance floor, but neither could she allow Nate to seem to own her. Nate had taken all that as rejection, which it probably was in a way. Could he have truly flirted with someone and gone into one of the Dungeons or Theaters with her? Would he really do that?
She didn’t do jealousy. She’d seen enough of it with her mother’s men. One in particular had interpreted the slightest smile at another man as flirting. He’d even get furious if her mother was only the recipient of interest and hadn’t done a damned thing to bring it on. Rages followed with shouting and beatings. Rae would cut off her own fingers before she’d allow herself to act like that.
Still, the idea Nate might find another woman attractive made a sour mess in her stomach. But he hadn’t shown any inclination to stray so far. Most likely even anger wouldn’t make him do it now. But where was he?
She found him, finally. Or rather a roar led her to him. She followed it and discovered a bunch of men and one woman had huddled around a television in a corner of the Forum. Watching a basketball game, of all things. She could not believe her eyes. Television in the middle of a sex party? A basketball game? How perverted could you get?
Something happened in the game, and the group shouted again. Nate and another man jumped up and high-fived each other. Delightful.
“Nate?” she said.
He glanced around and noticed her. “Oh, hi, Rae. One of the guys got the resort to set up a TV so we could watch the game.”
Rae, huh? She put her hands on her hips. “Was it that important?”
One of the men gave her a look as if he didn’t understand the question. “It’s the playoffs.”
Wasn’t it always the playoffs for something? She had a job to do here, and he was supposed to be helping. “Could I talk to you for a minute, Nate?”
“Uh, sure.” His expression said he knew he was in trouble, and he wasn’t too happy about the fact.
She guided him to an almost quiet place away from most of the action, took his elbow, and turned him to face her. “Why did you call me Rae in front of all those people?”
“I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.” He didn’t look as if he felt sorry. Instead he had the same look on his face he’d given her when she’d told him not to act as if they were attached to each other. Angry again. And more than a little as if he disapproved of what she’d asked him to do. To hell with that.
“I asked you to circulate among the guests,” she said.
“I did, and I met a bunch of Warriors fans.”
“So you decided to leave the party.”
He gestured with both hands toward the crowd around the television. “They are the party.”
She just stared at him.
“Besides, I got the secrets to good barbecue. One of the guys wins his neighborhood competition every year.”
“Cooking classes.” She threw her arms into the air. “Is that the image we’re trying to convey?”
“I’m getting pretty tired of our image, to tell you the truth,” he said. “And I think it sucks that you want me to pretend a sexual interest in someone else.”
“Oh, no. Don’t you dare develop morals on me now.”
“Just because I’m tired of acting as your plaything?”
Her eyes rolled of their own volition. How purely…well…sanctimonious. There wasn’t any other word for it. “I only asked you to be social.”
“That’s not true,” he said. “You told me to flirt with other people, and I don’t feel like doing that.”
“It’s just for one evening,” she said. “You said you wanted to help me.”
He blew out a breath. “I did.”
“I have to be Désirée Knight for this party, and I need for you to play along.”
“What if someone comes on to me?”
She looked him straight in the eye. “Do whatever feels natural.”
“Being with you feels natural.”
“Then do something else.” Why did the man have to be so stubborn? And why did he have to harp on being with her? He wasn’t going to be with her for much longer, as he very well knew. “Please, can’t you be good for one more evening?”
“Ah, shit.” He stared around as if someone might come to his rescue. After a little while, no one did, and his shoulders went back down to where they belonged. “I guess I’d better go…circulate.”
…
Rae had told Nate to do what came naturally, and right now another drink seemed the most natural thing in the world. The resort had invented a special cocktail for the occasion and had left pitchers of the stuff sitting on tables around the room. Nate found one and helped himself to another round. The thing was sweet. Not at all what he’d usually drink. But it was plentiful and free.
What a mess this whole adventure had turned out to be. Hook-Up Man, Friend with Benefits, all the euphemisms for fucking someone with no real relationship. It had sounded cute at the time, especially given how nonexistent his sex life had been before coming here with Rae. As the old song said, “Keep on using me until you use me up.” Now, with his libido under control, he could engage his big brain, and his gray matter was telling him the whole thing stank.
His most recent cocktail…third? Fourth?…went down too easy, and before he realized what he’d done, he’d finished it. He might as well face the fact he was going to get a buzz on. Fine. Then he’d go back to the room and sleep it off. When he woke up, maybe some sanity might have returned to the world. But first, he’d need at least one more whatchamacallit. Lady slipper or lemon dynamite or whatever. So he refilled his glass again.
Near the dancers, he spotted trouble in the person of Cassandra, wife of Rod. She gave him another of her come-hither smiles. Maybe this time he’d take her up on the offer. That’s what Rae had told him to do, whether he wanted or not. He poured a fresh drink into a new glass and, one in each hand, approached her.
“Looking for this?” he asked as he handed her a drink.
“Not exactly, but I’ll take it.” She sipped her drink in a seductive move she must have practiced in front of a mirror. She let her lips linger on the rim, creating a perfect impression of the lower one in the dark pink color of her lipstick. Then she said “mmm” and closed her eyes in apparent bliss.
When she opened them again, she gave him a look full of promise. “Thanks for the cocktail.”
She raised her glass, and he clinked his against it. As she did, she took a step closer to him. Out of the corner of his eye, he scanned the crowd for Rae. If she didn’t witness any of this flirting, there was no point to it. Pretending to get closer to other women was supposed to help her, and so he’d promised to do it, even if he’d rather be watching the game. No luck. He didn’t find her.
Just then, a shout erupted from the very group of people Rae had asked him to abandon for this fruitless exercise. Probably the Warriors had scored. Damn it, this was the playoffs, and he was missing it.
“I was interested in what you said in the Darkest Desires session,” Cassandra said.
He snapped his attention back to her. “I beg your pardon?”
“Wanting to know someone deeply during sex isn’t really dark, is it?”
“Oh, that.” He sipped his drink. Or rather finished it. “That depends on who you’re knowing.”
“For you that would be Désirée Knight, no?” she said.
“Désirée Knight, yes.”
“She doesn’t seem that dark to me,” she said.
“You haven’t seen her in action,” he said. “But enough about me. Are you having fun?”
“Now that you’ve joined me” She rested her palm on his chest. “Do you ever go in for a threesome?”
Damn. Good thing he’d finished his cocktail or he would have choked on it. “Do you mean me and two women?”
“That would be fun, but I was thinking of you and Rod and me.”
“Your husband doesn’t mind another man in your bedroom?”
“He’s very understanding. See. There he is.” She waved toward Rod, who stood in a clutch of people not far away. Rod waved back and smiled at Nate.
“Rod knows how to keep me happy, and I know how to reward him.” She took his hand and tugged. “Let’s dance.”
“Sure.” That would catch Rae’s attention for sure. He wasn’t much for dancing, but he could put his arms around a woman and move his hips.
Turned out that was pretty much all he had to do. After he set his empty glass on a table, Cassandra took over, wrapping herself around him as if she were drowning and he were a buoy. They moved together a while, and his cock took notice, stiffening a bit but not enough to cause a serious problem.
“How long are you staying at Eros’ Retreat?” she asked.
“Leaving day after tomorrow.”
“Désirée has asked to interview me for the magazine,” she said as she gazed up at him out of eyes the color of a cloudless sky.
“Has she?” Rae hadn’t shared that with him. Obviously, he wasn’t supposed to help her with anything meaningful.
“Is there anything I should say?”
“Be yourself. You’ll do fine.” Cassandra would make great copy for Rae. If only Rae would notice he was dancing hips-to-hips with Cassandra, Rae might come over and break it up.
Cassandra brought her glass to his lips so he could drink and then took a sip for herself. “These are so good. I’ve probably had too many.”
“I know I have.”
“A stud like you wouldn’t let a little alcohol slow him down.”
He had to laugh at that, although it came out more like a snort. “How do you know I’m a stud?”
“Désirée Knight wouldn’t have anything less.”
Just then, Rae’s voice came to him over the din. A shriek of laughter. He turned and found her at the Baths. One of the men had grasped her around the waist and now pulled her into the water.
He stopped dancing, so Cassandra turned to follow his gaze. “Looks like she’s having fun.”
“Yeah.”
“We’ll have our own fun, won’t we?”
He gently eased Cassandra away from him. “Would you excuse me?”
Her smile crumpled. “Really?”
“Really,” he said. “I’m sorry. I have to go.”
She put her free hands on her hip and huffed. Great. Two women disappointed in him. He couldn’t worry about that now. He had to get to Rae and…and do what? Never mind. He’d figure out when he got there.
He had to slither his way between moving bodies to make progress. And okay, he might have shoved a little, too. Her continuing laughter kept coming to him, even though he couldn’t see her clearly because of the crowds around him.
She was doing something with a bunch of people in the Baths. No one wore clothing in there, which meant she could be sitting on some man’s naked lap. Still, he was not going to get angry. She wasn’t Mallory. They weren’t married. They didn’t own each other.
Don’t own…don’t own…don’t own. He repeated it like a mantra as he approached. But his gut churned, anyway. They’d promised to be exclusive with each other. You didn’t break that kind of vow without reasonably expecting your lover to get upset. Maybe more than upset.
Don’t own, don’t own, don’t own.
When he finally got to the Baths, the scene was worse than he’d managed. Not only had one man pulled her into the hot water, but a bunch of men had gathered around her. They were all laughing and splashing. Just about the last “fun” you want to see your lover “enjoying.”
“What are you doing?” His voice came out louder than he’d meant, and all the action around Rae stopped. Everyone was staring at him.
She immediately scrambled to get out of the hot tub. Her dress clung to her body, outlining every curve, but her makeup was still intact. She had to know how sexy she looked, and for all he knew she’d had three or four pairs of hands on her.
“Really, Rae,” he said. “I know we’re supposed to be having fun and all, but…come on…”
Her eyes fairly glowed with anger, and she walked up to him. “I need to talk to you.”
“Fine. I’m not going anywhere.” Damned alcohol was suddenly kicking in for real. He blinked a couple of times, but the world didn’t focus very well.
“Oh, yes, you are.” She grabbed his elbow and led him away from the crowd. “You’ve been drinking.”
“Hey, it’s a party.” That also came out too loud.
“Will you lower your voice?” She got him off in an area near the exit. Private, sort of, but a few people glanced at them. Waiting to see what would happen, no doubt.
“What, exactly, is your problem?” she asked.
“You can ask that, when you were…” He gestured toward the general vicinity of the Baths. Honestly, he didn’t have a word good enough for what she’d been doing. “Were any of those men wearing swimming trunks?”
“I don’t know. I didn’t ask, and I didn’t cop a feel to find out.”
“Look at yourself. Your dress is plastered against you.” It was still dripping on the floor, forming an impressive puddle. “I can see the outline of your bra.”
“I’m not naked,” she said.
“You might as well be.”
“Lose the jealousy, Nate.” She stuck her nose up into his face. “We’re at a sex resort. We’re supposed to be enjoying ourselves.”
“Yeah, well there’s enjoying yourself, and then there’s Enjoying yourself with a capital E.”
A few giggles said at least two people were listening in on the conversation. Rae glanced around and then back at him.
“We’ll talk about this tomorrow,” she whispered. “Go back to the room.”
“And miss all the fun?”
“I mean it, Nate,” she said from between clenched teeth. “Go to the room now.”
“Come with me,” he whispered back.
“I am not going to do that,” she said, enunciating every word like a death sentence. She’d clenched her hands into fists by her side. If looks really could kill, he’d be on a slab at the morgue.
Holy crap. He’d seen her rant before, but he’d never witnessed simmering anger. He was getting a double dose of it now, and even if he was a bit pixelated, he wasn’t going to create a scene in the middle of her party. Or at least more of a scene than he already had. Still, he was in the right. She’d shoved him away from her into the arms of a blond vampire and then decided to entertain a bunch of naked strangers in a hot tub.
He raised a hand to point a finger at her and then dropped it. Hopeless. “Ah, shit.”
He turned around and headed back to the room. Alone.