"No ma'am, we haven’t even looked for it yet," Kacie said, pretending to feel around in her pockets. "I just wanted to knock and let you guys know what we were doing before I came poking around in your yard."
"Do you need some help?" Mrs. Carter asked.
"Oh, no thank you," I said, turning to begin looking around the dark grassy area near the path.
I was so nervous and mortified because of the charade that I took my own phone out of my pocket and carefully bent down with it in my hand. My plan was to make it seem like I was picking up Kacie's phone when it was really my own. I wasn't an expert with slight of hand, but I figured I had on enough layers to hide the evidence. I was extremely scared to attempt such a thing, but I was even more scared to cause a scene that would result in Owen Bishop coming outside.
"Got it," I said, turning to face them with a huge fake smile on my face. I was shaking like a leaf, so I just flashed the phone at them and quickly returned it to my pocket.
"You got it?" Kacie asked, sounding surprised.
I could see past Mr. and Mrs. Carter into the house and could tell someone else was walking toward the door. It was a female, but I was still horrified.
"Yep. Got it," I said a little too quickly. I patted my pocket. "It was right there. I got it. We better get back to the group."
"Y'all did such a great job," Mrs. Carter said. "I wish you would have sang a few more for us. I'm so glad we were here when you came by."
To my dismay, Mrs. Carter's comment gave her daughter enough time to join us at the door.
"Heyyy," Abby said, standing next to her parents and peering out at us. She stared at us with a friendly but curious expression that let me know she was trying to figure out who we were.
"They were with the carolers," Mr. Carter explained. "Miss Meyers dropped her phone, and they came back to look for it."
Neither Kacie nor I bothered correcting him. I crossed my arms in front of my chest. It was an act of frustration towards Kacie for getting us into this mess, but I hoped it came across as just me looking cold.
"They went to MCA," Mr. Carter added, talking to his daughter. "They knew you guys from there." Abby looked at us with newfound interest.
"You were older than us," I said.
"Yeah, we're Owen Bishop's age," Kacie added.
I felt blood rush to my face as soon as she said that. I gritted my teeth. I was so mad at her. I couldn't believe she had to go and say something like that when I was already out of my mind with nerves. I glanced at her with a fake smile and nudge her with my elbow. "We better get back to the group," I said. "Everyone's gonna be waiting for us."
"Oh, it's fine. They won't wait," she said.
"Owen's here," Abby said, pointing into the house from over her shoulder. "You guys are welcome to come in. We're decorating a gingerbread house."
"I saw him earlier when we came by," Kacie said. "That's why I mentioned his name."
She glanced at me for a split second, and I widened my eyes just slightly meaning (in girl-code) that she better, for the love of God, get us out of this situation before I freak out.
"Thank you, but we better get going," Kacie said. "Darcy's right. We should catch up to the group."
"You're welcome to come back if you change your mind," Mrs. Carter said. "I would have invited the whole group in for hot chocolate, but there were quite a few of you."
"Thanks, but we have to go," I said, pulling Kacie with one arm while waving at them with the other.
"Nice to see you, Abby," Kacie said as we retreated down the sidewalk. "Tell Owen Bishop that Darcy and Kacie said 'hi'."
"Seriously?" I asked after we made our way onto the sidewalk and out of earshot of the Carters. "I can't believe you did that! I can't believe you told her to tell him specifically we said 'hi'. What if that's her boyfriend?"
Kacie scowled at me like I was overreacting. "I can't believe I had an invitation to get us in there, and you wouldn't go in."
"We are not going to go crash their gingerbread party. She was just inviting us to be nice. Abby's probably dating Owen, and now she hates us for telling him 'hi'. I can't believe you did that."
"I can't believe you faked finding my phone," she said.
"I had to fake find it," I said incredulously. "Because it wasn't missing!"
"We should have taken her up on the gingerbread party," Kacie said, putting her hands to her mouth. "It's freezing out here."
The carolers were about four houses down, and we headed toward them. Part of me knew Kacie was right. Part of me wished I was inside the Carter's house coming face-to-face with Owen instead of walking down the freezing cold sidewalk. I was simultaneously mad at myself and at Kacie.
"Darcy!" it was a guy's voice coming from behind us, and my heart just about leapt right out of my chest as I turned.
Liam.
There was quite a bit of space separating us and it was dark out, but I could still clearly tell that it wasn't Owen. It was Liam. I could see him waving as he continued to walk toward us.
"What are y'all doing?" he asked, closing the distance between us on the sidewalk.
We turned to walk toward him. "We're caroling with Mr. Sanders," Kacie said. "He lives in this neighborhood, and we do it every year."
Liam looked at me. "I thought you were still living up in New York."
"I am," I said. "I'm just here for a couple of days."
"Abby said y'all came to the door." He paused and glanced over his shoulder toward the house. "She said you wanted to talk to Owen or something. He's in the basement playing pool with Andy's cousin. I told Shelby to go down there and get him. He should be out here any minute."
"Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no," I said. "Don't do that. Don't go get him. Let him play his game. I didn't want to tell him 'hi' in person, I just wanted to, I wanted Abby to tell him. Like a message." I pointed toward the carolers and started to lean in that direction. "We're going. We're caroling. We have to go sing songs. Just give Owen the message for us. Don't interrupt his game. It was great seeing you. Merry Christmas!"
I waved and smiled at Liam, who tilted his head at me and regarded me curiously as if wondering why I was in such a hurry. "Don't you want to talk to Owen? Shelby already went to get him."
"No, it's okay," I said. "I don't want him to come out here in the cold. Just tell him 'hi' for me and Merry Christmas."
"Are you sure?" Liam asked.
I nodded. "Yeah, there's no reason to interrupt his game. We have to get back to the caroling, anyway."
"All right," Liam said, shaking his head like it was a shame as he reached out to hug me. "He's gonna be sad he missed you."
Those words caused hot blood to rush all through my body. My nerve endings felt tingly and alive.
Liam reached out to give Kacie a hug as well. "It was good seeing y'all," he said. "Merry Christmas."
"You are such a spaz!" Kacie whispered as soon as we turned to walk away.
"Thanks," I said sarcastically.
"Seriously, he basically flat-out told you Owen wants to see you, and you just straight-up denied him."
"He doesn't know if Owen wants to see me or not. He's just guessing."
"Darcy!"
It was another male voice, and this time I knew who it belonged to. I felt weak in the knees and short of breath before I even turned around.
"I tried to talk her into staying, but she ran off." Liam was intentionally speaking loudly enough for me to hear. I knew he was tattling on me, and I knew he was talking to Owen. I turned slowly to find both of them standing on the edge of the lawn. It was dark out, but there was enough light from the street lights for me to clearly see Owen's face. He had on a long sleeve shirt but no coat, and he crossed his arms in front of his chest.
My body experienced every possible sensation.
I was hot and cold at the same time.
I was shaking and my knees were weak.
I was nauseated, short of breath, and everything else you can think of.
My body was going completely haywire.
"Hey," Kacie said. She started to walk toward the guys, but stopped as soon as she realized I wouldn't budge. She tugged at my arm, but I was completely paralyzed in my tracks—like my feet were one with the concrete sidewalk. Owen continued to walk toward us, and Liam gestured at him and waved at us before taking off toward the house.
"What's up," Owen said. He smiled casually as he walked toward us rubbing his hands together to fend off the cold. "It's been a while."
He reached out to hug me, and I leaned into him casually, trying not to completely collapse into him and began crying with relief like I wanted to do. I let go of him, taking a step back and trying to regain my composure. The warmth, feel, and smell of him was just too much. I was overwhelmed.
Owen leaned in and gave Kacie a casual hug to match the one he gave me. "This one I see from time to time on campus," he said. He looked at me. "But you… it's been a long time."
Three years and four months, I thought but didn't say—at least I don't think I said it.
"Did I say that?" I asked.
"Say what?" he asked.
"Nothing."
"Yeah," he said. "You've said nothing since I've been standing here. I thought the cat got your tongue." He grinned at me a little as if expecting me to respond, but I could do or say nothing. I had been so in love with him for so long that I was completely petrified.
"Abby said you were with the carolers who came by earlier," he said gesturing down the street at the group of singers. "I didn't see you."
I glanced over my shoulder, feeling thankful for the distraction. I could hear them singing.
"We were," Kacie said, since I was obviously useless. "Mr. Sanders goes to my church. We go caroling in this neighborhood every year."
Owen smiled at her before focusing on me. He looked right at me with an unreadable expression. "It's been so long," he said. "How's school going?"
"Good," I said, managing a little smile. I was so relieved to see him and be standing right next to him that I wanted to burst into tears. I held my hands in front of my face, pretending once again to warm them even though I wasn't even aware of the cold.
"She's a cheerleader," Kacie said. "And she makes straight-A's."
"A straight-A makin' cheerleader," Owen said, sounding impressed as he smirked at me.
I smiled and rolled my eyes at Kacie for blatantly bragging. "I'm sure you're cold without a jacket," I said. "You should get back inside."
Owen looked down at his own shirt as if he hadn't even bothered to worry about the temperature. "Why don't you come inside?" he asked. "Abby said she already invited you. We're all just hanging out in there. The girls are working on a gingerbread house. It's huge. You should come see it." Owen gestured in front of him making a box that was roughly two feet in every direction.
"That big?" Kacie asked. "I thought they were just decorating one of those little kits from the craft store."
Owen laughed. "No, it's the real deal. Abby's mom bakes these huge sheets of gingerbread, and they make a house out of it. They already had the house done when we got here. They're just decorating it. You should really come in and see it. It looks like a candy store in there."
"I want to go see it," Kacie said, tugging at my arm.
"No," I said, standing stubbornly in place. "We're not gonna go crash his girlfriend's party. We barely even know her."
"Come on," he said. "You know Shelby and Liam, don't you? They're both in there. It's really laid back, I promise."
Sure, he was trying to get us to come in, but he hadn't denied the part about Abby being his girlfriend, and that made me literally feel like I was going to throw up. Seriously, saliva accumulated in my mouth like I was actually about to do it. I turned and paced a few steps, walking in a tiny circle.
"It was great seeing you," I said, smiling but feeling like I needed to run for the hills. "Merry Christmas!"
Owen gave me a half smile that was way too composed. His dark eyes glimmered, reflecting the light from the nearby streetlamp. How in the world could he be so gorgeous and so completely calm?
"She's not my girlfriend, Darcy."
It was a casual enough statement, but the words implied some kind of deeper assurance—or maybe I was just hoping they did. He extended his hand and left it hovering there in mid air. There was nothing I could do to stop myself from reaching out to take it. Bam, bam, bam, bam, went my heart. I was shaking like a leaf, but I took his hand, anyway. I had never in my life been so thankful that I had on gloves because touching Owen barehanded would have given me a heart attack.
I glanced at Kacie who smiled at me like she was satisfied with herself.
"Do we need to tell them we're not caroling anymore?" I asked.
She shook her head. "They won't even notice we're gone."