I made Thad take his five dollars and the rose back.

Thad.

This was really happening. Thad standing in the flower shop. In his typical checkered pattern dress shirt tucked into a pair of dark blue jeans. A shiny black belt with a silver metal front.

Everything done up to a sense of perfection, always ready to do business.

“I needed to see you for a second,” he said. “Just a second.”

“A second,” I said.

I was suddenly reminded of a conversation I had with Osiris when we were walking through the woods. When he kept asking me what I would do if Thad came back.

“We need to talk about everything,” he said.

“No we don’t,” I said. “You need to leave. You need to go back to your family. You need to leave this store. This town. This state.”

Thad nodded. “Right. You’re pissed off. That’s good. That means you still feel. Right, Lara?”

I curled my lip. “I’m alone in this store.”

“I heard you were working here. That’s kind of…”

“Get the fuck out, Thad,” I said.

He reached for my hand. I was paralyzed. “Lara. What happened was unfair. And it wasn’t right. All I’m asking is for a minute to say what I have to say. When do you close?”

“Six,” I said.

“Can we grab a coffee?” Thad asked. “Is that so much to ask for?”

I pulled my hand away. “You can talk to me right now.”

“Lara…”

“No. Whatever you have to say, say it right now. I have plans tonight.”

“Oh, a date? A new guy?”

“None of your business either way.”

“It’s good, though. I mean, you should be with someone. Someone deserves you.”

I laughed. “Right.”

“Hey, do you still have the apartment?”

“Yeah. Why?”

Thad smiled. “I knew you would.”

“Excuse me?”

“What this all means. I just couldn’t live with myself anymore, Lara. What I did. What happened. How it all happened.”

“What are you getting at?”

“I’m… you don’t want to be here. I know you don’t.”

“Really? You’re here for a minute and you can read my mind, huh?”

Thad shrugged his shoulders. “Years of experience, Lara.”

“You’re wrong, then. I like it here.”

“Making a few bucks an hour. How great for you.”

“So you came here to belittle my financial situation.”

“No. I came here to save you. Let’s figure it out, Lara.”

“Figure out my financial situation?” I asked, laughing.

Thad reached across the counter for my hands. “No. Us.”

I pulled away. “What?”

Thad rushed around the counter. I backed up and bumped into the desk part of the counter.

“We’re meant to be together,” he said. “We know that. Right? I mean, we’ve had our moments before like this.”

“No. We haven’t.”

“Yes we have. We’ve called it off and gotten back together.”

“This is not us getting back together. You have a kid!”

Thad sighed. “Listen. Everything got messed up. I went out west to travel and had no idea what was going to happen.”

“Oh, that’s fine,” I said. “Here’s a recap. You fucked another woman and got her pregnant!”

I walked away from Thad.

I had orders to make.

I went to the far corner of the store, the old green notebook in hand, and I looked at the first order.

As I started to work, I felt Thad behind me.

“I didn’t know that was going to happen,” he said. “I was wrong. I said I was wrong. I admitted to you what happened.”

“Not the pregnancy,” I said.

“I didn’t know what to think, Lara. How could I be sure it was mine? What if this woman was just fucking around?”

I looked back. “So you’re telling me that Lenore turned into some mastermind to steal you? Please.”

“You say her name so smoothly,” Thad said. “You’ve looked at us, haven’t you? Pictures of us online. The baby. Everything.”

I didn’t respond. I focused on my work.

“That just proves my point here,” he said. “This isn’t over between us.”

“So, what, you want to have an affair with me now? Coast to coast, waving your dick around?”

“Lara, look at me,” Thad said.

I stopped and turned.

He inched closer to me. He put his hands out. I shook my head. He paused.

“Lara, I don’t know what I’m supposed to say here. So I’m just going to say what I want.”

“I don’t care what you have to say.”

“It’s hard. It’s not what I want. It’s not what I thought. The job. The life. The baby crying all the time.”

I laughed. “Oh, poor you. You didn’t mind the hours and time you spent flying out there to pick out all the stuff for the baby’s room. Fucking her. Flying home to fuck me. Did she know you were still fucking me?”

Thad swallowed hard. “You’re angry.”

“I’m beyond angry, Thad. I’m done.”

“You’re not done. We still have us. All those years.”

He reached for my hand. I swatted him away. He reached again. So I threw a backhand and cracked him across the face.

God, that felt so good to do.

I grabbed for my hand, my knuckles throbbing in pain.

“Wow,” Thad said. “I’m sure I deserved that.”

“You think? Now get out of here.”

“That’s what you want?”

“Yes.”

“I still have the key to our apartment.”

“Our apartment?” I asked with a laugh. “You had your own apartment, Thad. Remember? You didn’t want to get too close with things until we were ready. And to think I believed in that bullshit. How many women did you fuck while we were together? Huh?”

“Lara… I’m here right now, aren’t I? I left my baby across the country for you.”

That’s when something got to me. It wasn’t all that long ago this would have mattered to me. Thad spilling these smooth words. Flashing his perfect smile at me. Doing everything to work me over. Because I was the easy road for him. I was the comforting road. Whatever he wanted, I was there for.

But not anymore.

“You left them,” I whispered. “Alone. Does she even know…?”

Thad smirked. “I can’t help how I feel about you.”

He moved toward me again.

This time, I got a little bolder. I reached back and grabbed for a pair of scissors. I held them up, knowing I would never actually stab him, but damn, it was fun to scare him.

“Listen clearly, Thad,” I said. “You come near me again and I’ll cut your fucking balls off.”

Thad’s eyes went wide. “I like this side of you.”

“First off, you don’t get to see any side of me ever again. You broke my fucking heart, Thad. You destroyed my world. I lost everything because of you. And I never thought I would feel anything again.”

“Because you know you love me.”

“Maybe I do,” I said. “Maybe there’s a part of me that will always love you. But you got another woman pregnant. You lied to me for nine months. And now you’re doing the same thing to her. You’re a piece of shit, Thad. If you don’t leave right now, I’m going to call the police.”

“You’re the one pointing scissors at me,” he said. “Maybe I should call the police.”

“You better leave right now, Thad,” another voice said.

Thad turned and Percy stood there.

“Oh, jeez,” Thad said. “Percy. What’s up?”

Percy lunged forward and grabbed Thad by the shirt. He took him nose to nose. “I have nothing to lose, Thad. I’ll fucking gut you. Lara’s like a sister to me. And if you think what I’m saying is scary then maybe I should call her boyfriend and get him down here. I’m pretty sure he could bench press your fucking sports car. Is that what you want?”

Thad looked at me. “This is true?”

“Bigger is always better, Thad,” I said with a wink.

I knew that hit him hard. He was always self conscious about his size. And face it, if I had to be honest, Osiris was a man and Thad was just a boy.

I grinned as Thad walked out of the flower shop.

Bye, boy.

Percy walked over to me. “You okay?”

“No,” I said.

“I’m so sorry.” He hugged me. “Why don’t you cut out early and go up the mountain. Find him, Lara. You need him. He needs you.”

“Thank you,” I whispered.

I felt myself wanting to cry and scream.

I decided to finish my workday, though.

I smiled. I did cry. But I felt free. And I felt alive.

Then to my shock, my phone rang with a number I didn’t know. I answered it to a voice I never heard before.

“Lara?”

“Yes. Who is this?”

“This is Lenore. I’m so sorry to call, but I wanted to apologize for what I did and I wanted to know if you know where Thad is.”

* * *

I stood there as Lenore unloaded everything I already knew. Everything I had lived. Everything I had sort of been blind to see before it was too late. Then again, at least I hadn’t gotten pregnant by him.

She cried more than once. There was nothing I could say to her.

So I just told her the truth.

“He was there,” she whispered. “I knew it. I knew he’d go running back to you.”

“I can promise you nothing will ever happen.”

“I’m so sorry, Lara. I’m a terrible person.”

“You’re not.”

“I am. I didn’t know he was with someone at first. I found out after we were together the first time. But the scene he painted… even still, I should have known better. To keep going with him like that. The entire time he was out there. And then I found out I was pregnant. He first didn’t believe it was his.”

“Asshole,” I said.

“He had a point. But it was his. Olive is his.”

“Okay,” I said. “I don’t know what you want from me right now.”

“I don’t know either,” Lenore said. “I just wanted to talk to you. Strange, I know. I wanted to apologize. I’m secretly hoping I can fix everything, including him.”

“I think we both know the truth about that,” I said.

“Lara, did he ever… with anyone else?”

“I don’t know,” I said. “You were the first I knew of. I didn’t ask. But if I can say…” I felt my throat close a little. I shut my eyes. Was I really going to do this?

“Lara?”

“He loves you,” I said. “I don’t know what’s going on. Maybe he realized what he did. How bad it was. Maybe he’s stressed because of the baby. Maybe he thought he could run to his past again. But I would never do that to him, to you, to your baby, to myself. The situation is wrong but he spent all that time caring about you and the baby. That has to count for something.”

Lenore took a deep breath. “I know you don’t mean a word of what you just said but I appreciate you saying it. It’s hard… what am I doing? I shouldn’t be saying this to you. I ruined your life.”

“No,” I said. “You didn’t. Neither did Thad. I’m happy. I’m really happy.”

“Lara, I hope you-” I heard a baby cry in the background. My heart instantly ached. “Oh, I better go get her. She’s not due to be awake yet.”

“Yes,” I said. “Go to your baby. If Thad tries to get in contact with me again I’ll tell him you called. No more lies with anyone.”

“Any advice here?” Lenore asked, sounding weak. Tired. The baby crying louder.

“Love your baby,” I said. “Goodbye, Lenore.”

I ended the call and just stood there, frozen in space and time.

When Thad left and I began to follow him a little more than I should have online I thought about all the things I wanted to say to him. And her. I called Lenore a whore more than once, but never since she had the baby. That innocent life had nothing to do with any of our bitter feelings.

I thought about what Lenore said. What I said. What Thad said. He thought he could just come here and have me? I would have given myself to him, too. If it weren’t for Osiris. My mountain man. My hero. The guy who kept saving me and pushing me to my limits.

My mind was racing.

I didn’t even hear as Calvin came back to the flower shop.

“Hey, Lara? Are you okay?” Calvin asked. “Percy just called and said…”

I smiled at Calvin. And then I said the first thing that came to mind.

“Calvin… I quit.”