Chapter Eleven

Hope

Once Rowe came back inside, I had our food boxed up and the bill paid. I’m so embarrassed I want to climb under the table and hide. He looks me over, sees the Styrofoam containers in a bag on the table and nods. Thankfully, I don’t have to say anything. With my hand in his, we are out the door in under a minute.

We don’t talk on the way back to his house. Thank God the drag pipes on his Harley are loud. It would be difficult to carry on a conversation. With the bag of our dinner in one hand, I wrap my other arm around his waist and sit close. I feel like I’m holding my breath the entire ride. My nerves are going crazy, my hands are shaking, and a severe panic attack has taken hold of me. I can’t jump on my bike when we get back. He knows where I live. He knows my real name and two of my aliases now. There is no hiding.

He parks the Harley inside the garage. We both dismount and place our helmets on the seat. Instead of running, I follow him inside the house and take a seat at his kitchen table.

He places the food in the refrigerator and turns to me. “Anything you’d like to tell me?” I shake my head and look at my feet. “I told him we’ve been dating and no way could you have been the same woman who stole his money.”

My head snaps up and my eyes go wide. “Why did you do that?”

“Because this guy sleeps around. He couldn’t have recognized a woman by her lips alone.” If he only knew. I was on my knees before him. I did have my lips wrapped around his dick. But everything else on me was fake. And he was a shitty fuck. All about himself. Nothing would have stood out to him, though. For him to remember my lips…I must have been giving him an amazing blowjob.

“You don’t know me well enough to do something like that. You don’t know what I’ve done or what I’m capable of.”

“You think I don’t know you?”

“You don’t!” I shout as I stand, anger flowing through my veins. “You think you do, but you don’t!”

He steps in close and places his hand over my heart. The warmth of his palm radiates through my shirt, deep into my skin. “I’ve seen many sides of you in the brief time we’ve been together. And I know deep down in my soul that you’re a good person. If you’ve drifted off that path once or twice, it was for a reason. At heart, you are kind, loving, and the sexiest woman I’ve ever known.”

“You might think all of that, but the truth would knock you back on your ass. It would have you hauling me off to jail in no time.” I’m so tired of not letting anyone in. I’m moments away from spilling everything, but then I remember I’ll put him in a bad position, and I can’t do that.

“I told you I didn’t care about your past. I only care what happens from this day forward.”

“That’s not how things work. As much as we may want to erase what happened yesterday, last week, or even last year, we can’t. We just fucking can’t.” No matter how much I wish I led a different life, so I could feel worthy of Rowe’s attention and not like the scum on his shoe for all the crimes I’ve committed, it’s not my reality. I’m a criminal, and he’s the law. There is no grey area.

He sighs and takes my hands in his. I knew I shouldn’t have come here. I should have stayed home and kept my distance from him.

“Did you recognize that man?” he asks. I’m surprised it’s taken him this long. Maybe the cop side of him is finally kicking in and getting him thinking like the detective he is.

I shake my head. Lying is easier. Lying keeps me out of jail and him from getting in trouble if he decides not to arrest me. And right now, I want to keep him out of any possible shit he’d be in by being associated with me. I need to put him first. He has to stay on good terms with his department. Imagine what would happen if the community found out he was dating a criminal. All those people who have trusted not only him, but his father and his brother. No, I can’t do that to them. I won’t ruin an entire family’s reputation with my criminal lifestyle.

Turning, I break our contact, his arms dropping to his sides as I push past him but feel his eyes on me. It’s one of those gazes I don’t need to see to know it’s there. It’s searing my very skin.

“Where are you going?” he asks.

“To bed.” Luckily, I remember where his bedroom is.

“It’s early.”

I turn around and shrug. “I’m tired.” I can’t sit here and continue talking with him. The more I say, the more problems could rain down on him. The less he knows, the better.

He follows behind me, stopping me with an arm around my waist before I reach the bed. “Are you okay?” he asks from right beside my ear, his breath tickling my skin, sending goose bumps across my flesh.

“I’m fine,” I reply, trying to get him to move past this. Not that I expect him to. If he did, then he wouldn’t be a very good detective. It’s his job to question people and search for clues. Right now, I’m sure he’s trying to figure out if I’m lying or if it was truly a coincidence. Or maybe he wants to know to fulfill his curiosity. Then again, he could want to continue to see me as someone who is good and wouldn’t steal from anyone. Too bad that’s not me.

When Jason stopped at our table, I swear all the blood left my face. I felt cold all over, thinking that at any moment, it was all going to be over. I was going to be handcuffed and hauled off to jail. After so many years of not getting caught, it was finally going to end. Yet, I wasn’t. There are no cuffs on me, and the detective is currently kissing along my neck.

I’m not in the mood for sex, but maybe if we fool around, then he’ll drop it. I also need to formulate a plan to get out of here without him following me. He needs to stay here and remain the person everyone knows he is. He needs to continue protecting his community.

We had sex for hours. I had more orgasms than I can remember having in my life in such a short period. No one has ever made me feel the way Rowe did. No one ever took such care of me. Wanting me to come first. And to make sure my needs were met. It wasn’t just the physical aspect either. The emotion, which flooded me every time he gazed into my eyes, made tears build and my throat tighten. It wasn’t just sex now that I think about it. It was so much more. He was making love to me, and I don’t deserve to be loved by anyone as amazing as him.

I didn’t dare sleep. If I did, I would have been in a quiet slumber for hours. When Rowe’s body is wrapped around mine, I melt in to him. Every part of me relaxes and doesn’t want to move.

He rolled away from me about an hour ago. I have to make sure he’s in a deep sleep before I attempt to leave the bed and gather my belongings. If he wakes, there’s no way I can get away. And each day with him is another one where I could be caught. Being in this town, where people I’ve stolen from live, is dangerous and stupid.

When he hasn’t moved for a solid fifteen minutes, I slowly slip out of bed. Each step I take, I watch him. Any noise and I freeze in my tracks. He doesn’t stir. Not when I gather my clothes, not when I leave the room, and not when I grab the rest of my stuff and slip out of the house. I don’t start my Ducati until I’m out of the driveway and down the street a bit. The exhaust on it is nowhere close to being as loud and throaty as his Harley, but it still creates a low rumble. A rumble which could easily rouse Rowe from his deep slumber.

The drive back to my house is long. In the middle of the night, it seems to go on forever. There aren’t many cars on the road. Nothing to look at but the pavement passing beneath my tires. I have to be more alert at night. Deer can jump out. Also, it doesn’t take something big for my tire to hit and launch me into the air.

It’s during this time, when my mind drifts to Rowe. I have to do whatever I can to disassociate myself with him. He deserves better. A woman who has no past as a thief. Who has a steady, honest job and a promising future. For the first time in my life, things I wish I had.

Once I’m home, I’ll pack my shit for an extended time away. I decide to travel far. As far as I can get. I’m going to finally use the money that was left for me and not blow it. I’m going to start over somewhere else. Where people don’t know me and I can’t be tracked. I have a new cell phone at home, in a box, with a new identification. One I’ve never used. The only people I need to check in with are those who help keep up my houses. That’s as easy as a phone call and giving them my new number.

Being with Rowe has taught me that I need to grow up and stop acting like the same teenager I was when I started to steal. I need to start the life my parents would have wanted me to have. Every minute of being with Rowe made me want to be a better person. No matter how much I change or how much I do, nothing will ever make me good enough for him. That’s why I’m altering everything. I don’t want him to search for me. He needs to find a nice woman who deserves his affections. Although, I can’t say the thought of another woman touching him doesn’t make me jealous.

When I finally reach my home, I don’t bother stopping to sleep. I move as fast as possible to collect everything I’ll need. Several boxes are packed and not neatly. Any suitcase, duffel bag, hell I even use a garbage bag to stuff clothes in. I meant it when I said I don’t want to come back here anytime soon, not even for the holidays. That will be hard, but it’s necessary.

With my Honda safely tucked in the garage, I back out a maroon Ford Explorer and load it up before hooking it up to a small, enclosed trailer. The Explorer can’t pull too much, but a motorcycle inside a trailer isn’t an issue.

I make sure to lock the house up tight before I start my journey. When I bought this SUV, I did it all under the other name—the one I’ve never used. The escape plan has been in place for years. The only difference was I didn’t plan on bringing as much stuff as I am now. I thought I’d have to run with the cops close by. Knowing Rowe is probably still asleep gives me enough time to get everything done.

Now I need to slip onto the highway and live a new life where no one knows me. I’m moving to an area where I’ve never stolen anything from anyone. Hell, I’ve never even been to this state. When I get there, I’ll find a hotel until I can secure a home to rent. If there’s anything I know how to do, it’s live a life as someone else, and hopefully, far under the radar.