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Heart of the Wolf (The Heart Chronicles Book 1) by Alyssa Rose Ivy (7)

Hope

I stared at the white-flakey fish on my plate. Then I glanced across the table at Justin. He was looking at me as if this was normal. As if it was normal for the two of us to be having dinner together on a remote island. It wasn’t. Not at all. It was as far from normal as anything I’d ever experienced before. It was out of a strange desperation that I was even sitting at the table. I sensed running around screaming was going to hurt me a whole lot more than it hurt him. It also was going to do absolutely nothing to help my situation.

“You should eat more.” Justin gestured to my plate.

“And you should take me home.” Despite how good the Mahi-Mahi tasted, I couldn’t bring myself to enjoy it.

He leaned forward on his elbows, simultaneously violating established table manners and moving dangerously close to invading my personal space. “You’ve had four bites.”

“You really counted my bites? That’s scary.” Although not remotely as scary as bringing me to the island.

“I’m sitting right here. How is that scary?” He thankfully removed his elbows from the table and leaned back.

“Do you normally count the bites of your dining companions?” I wouldn’t have been particularly surprised if he did.

“No. But this is hardly an example of normal.”

A smile slid across my lips. “See, even you acknowledge it.”

“I admit the circumstances are unique.” He leaned back in his chair, leaving his palms resting on the table. “Please, eat more. I don’t want you passing out from hunger.”

“I’ve eaten.” The more he pushed me, the less I could muster the thought of eating. I didn’t want to do anything he wanted. “Can I go home now?”

“Will you please stop asking that?” His face tensed.

“Why? Will it annoy you if I keep asking?” Maybe I could annoy him so much he would beg me to board a plane and leave.

“Heads up, annoying me will not get you home any faster. There’s only one way to make that happen.”

“Why did you pick me?” Wasn’t that the crux of the problem? He’d decided I was the one he wanted. In theory there had to be other girls who would like this. Just like some girls liked bondage, but I’d rather eat a snake then go down that road.

“There are many reasons. Should I start with your beauty and?”

I cut him off before he could lay on fake flattery. “I mean with all the girls who actually like you, why waste your time like this?” I was careful to avoid the desperate word this time.

“Because I want you.” His eyes locked on mine, and I could almost feel the heat of his gaze. It wasn’t a good kind of heat; it was more akin to an August heat in the deep south.

“Couldn’t you just start wanting someone else? Perhaps someone who wants you too?” I closed my eyes, refusing to put up with his intense gaze any longer.

“That’s not how it works for my kind. We are cursed to set our sights on one. There’s nothing we can do once that happens.” His voice rang around me. With my eyes closed I could almost pretend we were having this conversation in the boardroom at work, or somewhere else far more normal—and less isolated—than this.

“You could break the curse. How hard have you tried?” I was more than willing to help. I was pretty much willing to do anything short of killing or hurting an innocent person to get myself out of this situation.

“It would be a whole lot easier if you woke up to your true feelings.”

I opened my eyes. I needed to see the person I was going to yell at. “I’ve already shared my true feelings. You don’t seem to enjoy listening to me tell you I hate you, so we should probably not go there again.”

“This is getting tiresome. You can’t hate me. I’d know it. We are a match. It works on every level. I can satisfy you.”

“Satisfy me?” I raised an eyebrow. “Is that what this is about? Proving yourself somehow?”

“You need to be with someone who can satisfy you. A human couldn’t do that.”

“Ugh! More of that human talk.” I put my hands over my ears. Really? On top of everything else he had to bring that up again. The concept reminded me of Mirabella. Anger flared in every part of me. For a few minutes I’d almost forgotten that a big part of this situation was my ex-best friend’s fault.

“Maybe I should just show you. It would make things easier.”

“Show me what?” I dropped my hands to my lap. I needed to stop artificially cutting off my senses; it wasn’t going to help things. I also needed to eat. I needed to be strong. I shoveled two bites of fish and a piece of pineapple into my mouth. I didn’t want to admit it, but both were delicious. My taste buds were rebelling. My fork returned to my plate when I remembered what he’d just suggested. “If it’s what’s in your pants, please don’t. I don’t want it anywhere near me.”

“You do want it near you, but that’s not what I’m going to show you.”

“Ok. So what is it?” With a certain body part off the table, I felt slightly better about things.

“You should finish eating first.”

“I just ate more.” I crossed my arms. “In case you weren’t counting this time, I had two bites of fish and a piece of pineapple.”

He smiled. “That’s a start, but no reason to stop. I can do the talking.”

“I don’t mind silence.”

“There’s a lot to tell you.” He put his hands behind his head.

“And evidently show me.” If he took off his pants I was going to scream. I hoped he was being truthful when he claimed it wasn’t that.

“I’ve been protecting you for four years. You probably never noticed. I assume you didn’t. Otherwise you’d be thanking me instead of yelling at me.”

“Protecting me from what?” This I had to hear. I wasn’t sure what I had needed protecting from at Ole Miss.

“You’re supposed to be eating.” He pointed to my plate.

“You can’t say something like that and expect me not to respond.” My anger, confusion, and fear were melding together in a dangerous mix.

“I’ve protected you from all sorts of foul admirers. You’ve had many.”

“In other words, you’re the reason why I never had dates?” Or when I did have the occasional one it never went anywhere.

“I’m the reason you were never someone’s prey.”

“The only prey I am is yours—except you’re not getting me.” I wrapped my arms tightly around me. I shivered, and I knew it wasn’t from the light breeze around us.

“I know you’re nervous. That’s normal.”

“Nervous about what you want to show me.” And about what he might do to me. I liked to think I could defend myself, but Justin was strong. I couldn’t let things get to that point.

“That and other things. I know how inexperienced you are. That isn’t a problem. It’s a good thing.” He leered at me. There was no better way to describe his expression.

Something dawned on me. “Wait. Inexperienced? You think I’m a virgin?”

“You are a virgin.” He straightened in his chair.

I shook my head. “No, I’m not.”

You are.”

“I’m not.” And a wonderful possibility hit me. He wanted me to be a virgin. I wasn’t. Maybe that somehow made me less desirable, and he’d let me go. “I’d know more than you would.”

“I’d know just as much as you.”

“I can assure you I’m not a virgin.” Hope surged through me. Suddenly I was grateful for the awkward sexual experiences with my high school boyfriend.

“Telling me you’re not isn’t going to change the truth.”

“It is the truth.” My smile grew larger the darker his expression became until I was giddy. “Ok. Show me what you want me to see. I’m tired of waiting.”

“Are you sure you are ready?”

I stood up, careful not to fall into the water. The table had been placed precariously close to the edge of the deck.

“Maybe you should stay seated.”

“I’m not sitting down.” I put a hand on my hip. I needed to be ready to run if I didn’t like what he showed me, and I knew there was a real possibility of that.

“Are you sure? I think it would be better.”

“You do not know what’s better for me. You don’t even know me.” Like he didn’t know my virgin status.

“I know you. I know everything about you. I know your favorite color is red; your favorite dessert is crème brule. We’ll be having that tonight by the way. I know you secretly hate football but won’t tell anyone.”

“None of those things say anything about who I actually am. Like I said, you don’t know me.”

“You worry you’re not good enough. Not pretty enough. Not strong enough. You don’t like going to the gym because you think you look weak.”

“Stop it.” I looked down.

“Then admit I know you.”

“I’m not admitting anything. I want to go home.”

“Hope. Come on. You’re smarter than this. You are not going home until we mate. That’s it. There’s only one way off this island, and it’s all in your hands. All you have to do is ask me to take you as my mate. That’s all I’m waiting for. Then a few hours later, we’ll be on my plane on the way back. You move in to my apartment. You can quit the job if you want, or not. It’s completely up to you. You won’t need the money, but who am I to stop you from working?”

I willed my eyes to rise to meet his. “Show me. I’m done waiting. Show me.”

“Ok. Don’t get too freaked out. I’m not dangerous.”

“You’re not dangerous?” I snorted. “Oh yes. Because kidnapping isn’t frightening.”

“I haven’t hurt you, have I?” There was something vulnerable in his voice as if he cared about that fact.

“Keeping me here is hurting me.” I needed to go home. I wasn’t sure how much more of this I could take.

“What would you be doing at home?”

“What does that matter? I am still here against my will.”

“Only until you do the right thing.”

“The right thing?” I had been annoyed at Justin before, but this wasn’t annoyance. This was real, true anger like I had never experienced before.

“Ok. Stay calm.” He started to unbutton his shirt.

“What are you doing? I already told you I don’t want to see anything that’s under your clothes.”

“It’s not that. I swear.” He took off his shirt and tossed it to the side. Then he went to the button of his pants.

“Stop it, now.” I slowly moved to the side. I had no interest in seeing him naked.

Then in a flash of haze, Justin was gone. The air seemed to shimmer, and in his place was a giant wolf. I screamed and stepped backward, falling of the deck and right into the water.

The warm water greeted me, seeping into my clothes. What the hell was that? A wolf? Justin sent a wolf after me. The water washed over me, snapping me out of my shock.

I started to swim across the gentle waters of the cove and out toward the open ocean. It was stupid. Reckless. Exactly what I shouldn’t be doing, but Justin shouldn’t have been able to turn into a wolf. The bad situation had only gotten worse.

“Hope! Come back!” Justin yelled from somewhere, but I didn’t listen. I kept swimming. My body ached, and I wished I didn’t have so much clothing in the way. It made it hard to move. I’d lost my sandals when I hit the water, so at least I could move my feet freely.

I heard a splash and knew he’d jumped in after me.

I didn’t take the time to turn around to make sure. I pushed myself harder. I had to get away. Of course there was really nowhere to go. I saw no land, but maybe there was something beyond what could be seen with the naked eye. I pushed myself as far as my body could go, my muscles screamed, but I had no choice. Giving up wasn’t an option.

“Hope.” Justin’s voice came from far too close behind me. He was catching up. “Stop. You are swimming out too far.”

I couldn’t exert the energy to answer. I kept going.

“You’re swimming too far out. You won’t be able to get back.” His voice was even closer. He had nearly caught up.

I pushed harder, but this far from the cove the waves were merciless.

A large wave hit me, taking me under. I fought against it and struggled to make my way back to the surface.

Justin’s arms came around me. I wanted to fight him off, but I couldn’t. My entire body hurt. I was exhausted.

“Come on, let’s get you home.” His voice was a whisper against my skin.

My eyelids felt as heavy as weights, and I accepted the darkness. “Home.” I thought. Home sounded perfect. I pictured my bed. My room. Maybe I could go to my parents’ house. That would be nice. I thought about all the places I had ever called home before. Even my freshman dorm would be okay. That mattress wasn’t so bad.

I should have fought him off, but I was too tired to fight anymore. It was hopeless. There was no land for miles and no one around but staff, who obviously knew what was going on and didn’t care.

I was stuck there. Forever. Because I would never agree to sleep with him. Never. He was crazy. And what the heck was with the wolf?

I moved in and out of consciousness, hearing bits and pieces of Justin’s voice.

“I told you to sit down.” Justin’s voice sounded far away.

“Wolf. There was a wolf.” I managed to get the words out. We were out of the water, but I felt as though I was still bobbing. The breeze was cold against my skin.

“That was me. I am the wolf. I’m a shifter.”

“No.” I was too tired to say anything else. How could I talk sense to a crazy person?

“It’s not a lie. That’s my other form. It’s not scary. Your kids will be able to change too.”

“My kids?” I wasn’t sure if I spoke out loud or not. This was getting worse. His delusions were getting even crazier, and unfortunately they all seemed to involve me. There was no way Mirabella would actually leave me here forever. Eventually the guilt would get to her. She’d be back.

“Yes kids. I want at least two. Maybe three. Or up to six if you’re interested.” More about kids? Was he that delusional? Yes. He was. And I had also been delusional. I knew I wasn’t getting saved.

I heard the sound of a door open. My eyes were still shut. It was too hard to open them. My wet clothes stuck to me, making me even colder.

I felt something soft below me, then the sensation of someone tugging on my wet clothes.

“Get your hands off me.” I struggled to fight him off.

“Hope, you have to get the wet stuff off.”

“I’ll do it myself.” I tried to sit up, but I couldn’t.

“Let me help you. I promise I won’t do anything.”

“I can stay in the wet clothes.” I wasn’t going to accept help from him. I wouldn’t accept anything from him.

“No.” His voice came from right above me. “I’m not going to let you get yourself sick. That defeats the purpose of any of this. It’s my job to take care of you.”

“Please.” I forced my eyes open.

His face was inches from my own. “You really think you can do it alone?”

“Yes. Leave.” I needed him far away. I felt tears streaming down my face.

“I’m not going to hurt you.” He was wasting his breath. I would use every ounce of strength I had left to get him to leave.

“Leave.” I pushed the word out, mentally calculating how much energy it would take to kick him in the balls.

“I’ll check on you.” He stepped through the doorway.

As soon as the door closed, I struggled out of my wet clothes. No wonder swimming had been so hard. They weighed a ton.

I selected the first thing I found out of the dresser—an oversized white shirt and pulled it over my head. I dragged myself over to the door to look for a lock. Nothing. I used every ounce of strength I had left to push a small dresser over to block the door. I made it far enough to pull the extra blanket off the bed, but the bed was too high up, so I curled up in the blanket on the floor.

Maybe it was all a dream. Maybe when I woke up the nightmare would be over.

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