Chapter Fourteen
Cal closed his eyes and held Cynthia tightly. Her body was already spooned against his, but still — it felt as if he could never hold her close enough. His arms crossed over her chest, and he could count her every heartbeat. Which he did, just to assure himself he was in reality and not another dream.
“Mmm,” Cynthia sighed, running her hands over his arms. Then she chuckled. “Are you marking me?”
He froze in the act of dragging his chin across her shoulder in slow, side-to-side movements.
“Um… I might be. Got a problem with that, miss?”
She wiggled, prompting another long scrape of stubble against skin. “Don’t stop, and you won’t have a problem, mister.”
He grinned. There were so many sides to Cynthia. Classy and reserved. Cool and commanding. Warm and nurturing, though she rarely revealed that to anyone but Joey. She also had an elusive, saucy side, not to mention that take-charge-in-bed side that only came out once in a blue moon, like tonight.
I like, his wolf hummed. I like.
He went back to rubbing his chin over her skin, basking in the moment. One round of sex might not wipe away a decade of pain and sorrow. But, hell. It was a good start.
He thought back, trying to pinpoint what had finally made Cynthia flip that inner switch and allow him to get intimate again. Was it the song in the restaurant earlier that day? The subtle encouragement of the women in her pack?
Cynthia smoothed the hair of his forearms in one direction then the other, whispering, “No.”
He held still. Had he done something wrong?
“Neither of those things,” she said.
He exhaled. Apparently, she’d been reading his mind, and his train of thought had disturbed her sense of peace.
He brought his knees higher, snuggling her rear with his body, and all but growled in her ear. If destiny thought it could mess with him and his woman again, it had another thing coming.
“Forget it. Not important,” he insisted.
A minute passed, and Cynthia relaxed, though not quite as much as before. Then she sighed, turned in his arms, and cupped his face.
“It is important,” she said, looking far sadder than a woman ought to after sex as amazing as that. “I’ve been so blind. It kills me to think how much I put you through.”
Cal shrugged. All that mattered was holding her again.
But Cynthia shook her head and held him tighter. “Like I said, I spoke to Moira before dinner.”
He frowned. “I swear, that woman is at the root of all evil in this world.”
Cynthia stroked his cheek, looking more sorrowful than ever. “She told me, Cal.”
Her words were heavy with significance, and he immediately went on guard. “It’s better not to listen to the lies she spins.”
“True, but one comment sort of slipped out, and I believe it.”
“That’s the tricky thing with her kind. They use a kernel of truth to sell their lies.”
“She told me about Barnaby’s meetings with a certain wolf.” Cynthia’s voice was slow, careful.
Cal lay perfectly still. How the hell had Moira found out about that?
He tried bluffing it away. “Why would Barnaby do such a thing?”
“You tell me.”
He took a deep breath, taking his time. In his dreams, he’d lived this moment a thousand times. His chance to finally tell her everything. All the sacrifices he’d made, all the battles he’d fought — all for her, his one true love. But as much as it killed him, he couldn’t reveal a thing.
He closed his eyes. “I can’t tell you. I promised.”
She stroked his cheek softly. “You promised Barnaby?”
Damn it. Had Moira told Cynthia everything?
He nodded the teensiest, tiniest bit.
“What did you promise Barnaby?”
God, was he sick of the past. Sick of it flashing before his eyes, even when he had them closed. What the hell had he been thinking when he’d made that dumb promise?
We were thinking, anything for her, his wolf recalled.
“Cal…” Cynthia’s voice was soft, sweet. Honest, because she didn’t know any other way. “What did you promise Barnaby?”
He inhaled and exhaled slowly. Surely, Cynthia could understand why he wouldn’t mess with a promise.
“All right, then let me guess, and you just nod or shake your head,” she said. “That doesn’t break the promise, does it?”
“Kind of pushing the boundaries, don’t you think?”
She flashed a bittersweet smile, then grew serious again. “Barnaby called you in…”
Cal considered. Technically, no, but he wasn’t keen to get into the details of how he’d snuck in to kill Barnaby.
“And you got to talking…” Cynthia continued.
He grimaced. Barnaby had done most of the talking.
“He offered you money…”
Cal looked up, feeling his eyes heat. Did Cynthia think so little of Barnaby — or him?
She nodded curtly. “I didn’t think so. So damn honorable. Both of you,” she muttered, though she didn’t really sound angry. “Anyway, he asked you to stick around. To protect me.”
Her eyes bored into him, and Cal had no choice but to nod slightly.
“To protect Joey, too?”
Cal’s gut roiled as hard as it had the day he’d discovered she was pregnant, but he nodded. “Joey, too.”
“You did that? For me?” Cynthia’s voice trembled.
“I love you. I will always love you,” he whispered. “I would do anything for you.”
“I love you too. More than anything else in the world. And yet…”
Her eyes grew blurry, and his wolf snapped to attention. Whoa. Is she crying?
She was shaking a little, that was for sure. Cal rubbed his thumbs over the back of her hands. “Cynthia…”
She turned away, burying her face in the pillow. “I loved you so much, but I didn’t love you enough. God, Cal. I was so selfish. So stupid…” She broke into sobs.
Slowly, gently, he pried her away from the pillow and gathered her into his arms. They’d both experienced enough sorrow to last a dozen lifetimes. Why entertain more?
“You had no choice. They forced you.” He smoothed a hand over her cheek, trying to find the right words. “I would have done the same thing, just to stay sane.”
“But you didn’t,” she insisted, shaking in his arms. “You didn’t try to forget me. You didn’t pretend.”
“I pretended lots, believe me.”
Words didn’t help, though, and he gave up after a while, holding her instead. Fighting the burn in his own eyes, not that he would admit as much.
Finally, Cynthia’s tears eased, and she looked at him through huge, vulnerable eyes. Cal stroked her cheek. God, were they birds of a feather. Driven by the instinct to appear tough, even around each other.
“It doesn’t matter any more,” he whispered, guiding her hands to lie nice and flat against his chest instead of clutching at the sheets.
She started to shake her head, but he spoke first. “The past doesn’t matter. Well, except maybe the good parts.”
Her lips curled upward slightly.
“And Moira doesn’t matter.” He hated bringing up that bitch, but it had to be done. Once and for all, they had to agree on that one thing. “She won’t mess with us again.”
Cynthia shook her head. “She’ll try. I guarantee it.”
“Okay, she will. But she won’t succeed. And you know why?”
Cynthia searched his eyes.
“Because love wins.” He said it loudly, firmly, in case destiny was listening in. Destiny needed to hear that as much as Moira did. So he said it one more time for good measure. “Love wins.”
Cynthia’s smile grew, and she echoed his words. “Love wins.”
Cal nodded. Then he kissed her, chasing away her doubts. Love would win, dammit, because he would fight for his mate to the very end.
“Mmm,” Cynthia breathed into the kiss.
Slowly, their bodies cozied up in a whole different way. Not so much clutching each other but cuddling. Playing. Calling to one another. Cal moved his kiss from her lips to her shoulder because, hell. Every part of Cynthia needed to know he meant what he said.
When she settled into the mattress, he scooched lower, following her collarbone… her sternum… her breast…
Cynthia arched sharply, and her nipple begged for his lips. He popped it in and out of his mouth, suckling gently. Yeah, her nipples definitely needed to feel the love too.
“Cal…” Cynthia breathed, guiding his head to the other side.
“As you wish…”
The longer he touched her, the harder his cock grew, and before long, her wandering fingers homed in on that aching part of his body. When she grasped him, he hissed in raw desire.
“And what do you wish for, Mr. Zydler?” she breathed.
He grinned against the soft flesh of her breast, letting her figure that out on her own.
And sure enough, Cynthia started sliding her grip up and down his cock. Delicately, like he was made of her mother’s goddamn china.
Not the mother again. Please, his wolf begged.
He snuck a hand down between her legs, marveling at every inch. All that smooth skin, free for him to enjoy. A fantasy come true in every possible way.
Cynthia arched as his fingers zeroed in on her core, but he didn’t look up. He went right on kissing — licking — suckling her nipples, unable to get enough. Everything else faded away until it was just him and her. Her intoxicating scent. The silk of her skin. The heat of her body, calling to him.
“Cal…” she panted, hooking her legs around his waist.
He gritted his teeth, telling himself he could draw out this pleasure a little longer. But within seconds, he reared up and repositioned himself. Anchoring his hands on either side of her head, he lined up their bodies.
Cynthia looked up with those dark, dancing eyes that had seduced him from day one. Her raven-black hair was fanned out over the pillow, and her mouth opened a crack.
“I need you so much…” she whispered.
She raised her knees along his sides, which meant the only thing left for him to do was—
“Yes…” she groaned as he thrust in.
Cal closed his eyes, hanging on to the sweet burn. When the edge wore off, he withdrew then slammed forward.
Cynthia cried out, abandoning her inhibitions yet again. Handing the reins over and settling back as if to say, Please make me feel good enough to chase the past away.
Cal would have loved to utter another As you wish, but he was too busy losing his mind to sheer bliss. Having Cynthia ride him earlier had been incredible, and he’d loved every second. But this was different — even more intimate, somehow, because their bodies were wrapped around each other, creating a sensual cocoon. Her arms played over his back, her knees cradled his sides, and her hips rocked in time with his.
“Yes…” she moaned, extending her arms over her head.
He gripped them, pinning her in place against the force of his thrusts.
So good… Her voice echoed through his mind.
Faster. Harder, his wolf growled.
As the momentum built, so did the pressure in his body, until he was desperate for physical and emotional release.
Just a little longer, his wolf urged.
How he kept moving, he had no clue. His cock ached, and his knees felt like they were about to give out. Cynthia clenched her inner muscles around him, making him groan. Finally, he gathered every scrap of longing that had accumulated over the years, withdrew, and took a deep breath.
“Cal—”
Cynthia’s voice cut off as he plunged deeper.
His vision dimmed. His shoulders stiffened, and every muscle in his body went rock hard. It was heaven. It was every forbidden dream come true. The impossible made possible, at least for one night.
Yes, his wolf hummed. Yes…
Cynthia went limp before he did, but a moment later, she cried out and shuddered a second time. Her nails dug into his shoulders, giving him the edge he needed to pump into her one more time.
Then they both collapsed into the sheets, panting. Cal used his last ounce of energy to pull her close. Then he shut his eyes and concentrated on breathing for a little while. Not that he’d mind dying from sheer ecstasy, but he’d rather spend more time with his true love first.
He cracked open an eye, then let it shut again. Okay, so the bed was a mess. The room was strewn with clothes they’d eventually have to reclaim. The night wouldn’t last forever, and in a few short hours, Joey would come skipping home. But for now…
Let go, Cynthia whispered in his mind.
Funny, that was supposed to be his line.
But, hell. He’d never felt wearier or so utterly satisfied. Maybe they really could ignore the outside world a little longer.
Let go, Cynthia said, caressing his back.
Cal inhaled… exhaled… and slowly, comfortably, eased into a deep, contented sleep.