Chapter Eighteen
Since they’d already lost travel time, Hawk dressed quickly as Lizzie lay in bed, the covers drawn up to her chin, watching him. A conversation about what had just happened was necessary, but they could do that in the carriage on their way to Hawkins Manor.
“If you can dress quickly, I will see that the innkeeper has breakfast ready when you come downstairs. I promise you a nice hot bath tonight when we stop.” Traveling that much today was probably not the best thing to do, since Lizzie would most likely be very sore, but the sooner he got her to Hawkins Manor the better he would feel about her safety.
He hesitated for a moment, then strode over to where she rested and kissed her on the forehead. She only stared at him. A bit discombobulated, he left the room.
His reception from her was precisely why he avoided entanglements with the women he bedded. After the wonderful time they’d had, she acted as though he’d done something wrong. Widows and unhappy matrons were always satisfied with a good romp in bed. Opera dancers wanted jewelry, clothing, and a carriage.
Wives got everything a man claimed ownership to. His title, homes, money, consequence, and children. But what did a man do to soothe a woman who was not a widow, unhappy matron, wife, or opera dancer?
Make her my wife.
That was exactly where his thoughts were headed, but until this matter with her father was cleared up, he could not commit himself. He was certain she had not been involved with her father’s actions. But knowing that and finding proof was another thing. A minor crime committed by the wife of a peer could be swept under the rug. While treason was not a minor crime, being his countess would give her an advantage she had not had being Lord Loverly’s daughter.
If he truly wanted to protect her…
Lizzie joined him in the private dining room looking less somber than when he’d left her. “This looks wonderful.” She settled in her seat and eyed the dishes on the table. Porridge, bacon, boiled eggs, warm rolls, creamed herring, and fruit.
“Yes. Quite a repast. Once we have finished we will head to Hawkins Manor.”
Lizzie swallowed a bite of bacon, along with a sip of tea. “How long of a journey is it from here?”
“The few hours of travel we lost yesterday puts us behind, but if the roads remain dry, we should gain enough time to make only one more overnight stop. We could probably push it, but once it grows dark, it is difficult to travel.”
“Then what?”
“I dispatched a man this morning with a message to the Home Secretary. At this point he is the only one I trust. I am hoping he will put the request for me to return you to London on hold until we can discover what the person making attempts on your life is seeking. I am sure it is all tied together. There must be something that your father did or said that makes this person believe you are a threat to him.”
Lizzie shook her head and dabbed her mouth with her serviette. “I have thought about it, even after our discussion yesterday, and still, nothing comes to mind.”
“There must be something, a piece of paper, a book, a ledger that incriminates this person, and he thinks you have access to it.” Hawk reached across the table and placed his hand on hers. “I just want you to know I will protect you, and make sure no harm comes to you.”
As much as he meant those words, the picture of him picking up his muddied sister’s body from the rain-drenched ditch where their carriage had overturned flashed in his mind. He’d not taken proper care of her.
He closed his eyes and tightened his hold on her hand as the pain ran through his body, as fresh as the night it had happened. “No. I will not allow anything to happen to you.”
“I think perhaps we should speak about this morning.” They had been riding in the carriage for about an hour. The silence was wrought with tension, but during that time, he’d thought of various ways to bring up what they’d shared. No matter that he had reservations about the problems she faced. He had to be a gentleman.
“I believe we should marry.”
Her head jerked up, and she viewed him with wide eyes. Surely she was not surprised by his statement. As a member of the ton, she was aware of what happened when a young lady was compromised. Either she married the man who took advantage of her, or she ended up disgraced and cast out from Society.
“Most certainly you jest, my lord.”
“Ah. So we are back to ‘my lord.’ And why in blazes do you think I would jest about something like this?”
She shook her head and twisted the fingers in her lap. “Answer me truthfully. Had we not been intimate this morning, would you have offered for me?”
“That’s a ridiculous question.” He waved his hand at her.
“No. It is not. Would we be discussing marriage between us right now had we not availed ourselves of pleasure this morning?”
He didn’t answer, just continued to stare at her. Of course, he would not be offering for her this morning, because she was still under the scrutiny of the Home Office. He was under orders to bring her in for questioning in a very serious matter. Nevertheless, the gentlemanly thing to do was to marry her and save her reputation.
“My dear. We have posed as husband and wife twice and shared a room. Even if we had not been intimate, that alone would suffice to ruin you.”
“So, the answer to my question if you would be offering to marry me at this time if this morning had not happened is—what?”
Hawk ran his fingers through his hair. Why did the girl make things so difficult? “It is the right thing to do.”
“Then the answer to your offer of marriage must be no,” Lizzie whispered.
Bloody hell, dealing with this woman was frustrating. “I can’t give you a proper answer to your question because it is not a proper question. This morning did happen, and the correct thing to do is to marry. So I repeat my question. Will you marry me?”
…
Lizzie turned from Hawk’s intense stare and looked out the window. Marriage. She had assumed it would never happen once her father’s disgrace had become known. She’d planned to stay in her position as governess to Wycliff’s children for many years.
She drew herself up and faced him. “My lord, while I am flattered by your offer, I am afraid I must refuse.”
He shook his head, and she was unable to tell if he was relieved or not. “You cannot say no. You might be carrying my child.”
“Not very likely. Several friends of mine were married for months before they conceived.” As precarious as her situation was at present, the last thing she needed was a husband. Especially a husband who considered it his ‘duty’ to marry her. Being someone’s “duty” did not sit easily with her.
If things did not go well with the Home Office she would be forced to run once again. Impossible to do when one was under the control of a husband.
“Perhaps it has taken a while with your friends, but it can certainly happen with one encounter.”
“You withdrew,” she snapped, tired of his badgering.
He leaned forward. “That is not a surety.”
“Nevertheless, I decline.” She raised her chin.
Hawk glared at her. “My honor is at stake here.”
They stared each other down until Hawk leaned back against the squab, his jaw tightened. “This discussion is not over.”
Nothing had been settled between them by the time they reached Hawkins Manor the next afternoon. The inn they stayed the night before had had enough open chambers to allow them separate rooms. Although it had been unnecessary, Hawk had explained to the innkeeper that his wife suffered from megrims and preferred her own room.
She had the beginnings of a headache as the coach started up the long winding road that Hawkins said led to his manor. The skies were a dreary gray, which cast a colorless tone over everything, including her disposition. The trees lining the pathway were beautiful, but with grayness shrouding everything, she couldn’t appreciate them.
The closer they got, the harder her heart pounded, and her stomach muscles twisted. She knotted her fingers in her lap and took deep breaths to calm herself. What would Lady Hawkins think of her situation? Of course, she would have heard of Lizzie’s father’s traitorous acts. How would the countess feel about a traitor’s daughter taking up residence in her home?
She glanced at Hawk to see if he was feeling any of the disquiet she was.
“What is wrong?” He had to have been watching her to note the change in her demeanor.
“Are you sure this is a good idea?”
He frowned. “What do you mean?”
“Your mother might not want a disgraced woman living under her roof.”
“Hawkins Manor is my home. As much as I love and respect my mother, I make the decisions regarding the earldom and its various properties.”
Lizzie sniffed. “It is still her home. She might not want a traitor’s daughter as a guest.”
“Enough!” Hawk ran his fingers through his hair, then reached for his hat and placed it on his head. “You will be welcomed.”
The carriage came to a rolling stop. The driver jumped down and opened the door. Hawk exited first, then turned to take Lizzie’s hand and placed it on his arm. He turned his attention to the driver. “I will have my man pay you for your services. If you will go around to the entrance in the back, Cook will provide you with a meal before you set off.”
The driver bowed and touched the brim of his cap. “Thank you, my lord.”
They moved toward the house just as the front door opened and a man in red and gold livery stepped out and bowed. “Welcome home, my lord.”
“Thank you, Connors.” He handed his hat and gloves to the butler. “Lady Elizabeth will be spending some time with us.”
The butler bowed. “Welcome, my lady.” His eyes shifted to Hawk. “Shall I have one of the maids direct her ladyship to her bedchamber, or would you prefer refreshment first?”
Hawk looked at her with a questioning glance.
What she really wanted to do was disappear, but with no resources, and someone trying to kill her, she had no choice. “I would like to refresh myself from the trip first, and then I could use refreshments.”
“Have Cook prepare a light meal for me and her ladyship and set it up in the dining room. Also, there is a coachman at the back door who drove us. See that he receives a meal and have Mannerly join me in the library.”
Connors bowed and turned to Lizzie. “If you will give me a minute, my lady, I will fetch one of the maids.”
“Thank you.”
“I will see you in the library when you are finished. Have one of the footmen direct you.” With those curt words, Hawk walked away from her.
A young maid hurried up to her. “Welcome, my lady. My name is Maggie. Please follow me to your bedchamber.” She looked around. “Where is your luggage?”
Embarrassed at her lack of belongings, she pointed to the small and large satchels on the floor where the driver had deposited them. The maid smiled brightly. “I’ll get them, and then you can follow me.”
Lizzie wondered where Lady Hawkins and Hawk’s sister, Lady Honora, were. She assumed they would be in residence with Parliament no longer in session. Most members of the ton would have retired to their country estates, awaiting hunting season, when they would hold numerous house parties.
She followed Maggie up the stairs and down the corridor. She stopped and opened a door and stepped back to allow Lizzie to enter. It was a lovely room, done in pale rose and light green. A large, comfortable-looking bed sat in the middle of the room, the bed coverings a duplicate of the drapes on the windows. A plush carpet covered the highly polished wooden floor.
Maggie placed the satchels on the floor. “Would you like me to unpack for you, my lady?”
Still embarrassed at her lack of luggage, she shook her head. “Thank you, but I will see to it.”
Maggie walked to the door and gave Lizzie a slight curtsy. “If you need anything else, please ask one of the footmen to fetch me.”
Lizzie thanked her and turned back to the room. She walked to the bed and collapsed on the counterpane, her arms over her head. She gazed at the canopy above her. Well, she was here.
God help her with what came next.