Thirteen

Nell saw the first spot of bright-red blood on Thanksgiving Day.

It was the day they had decided would be perfect for the Porterfield ranch’s annual party, a party that included neighbors and friends, and that Trey’s sister Maria and her husband, Chet, had made the trip from California to attend.

After Ira’s trial, Trey had taken Lottie’s boys with him to search for the missing sheep. As Trey had suspected, the sheep had been put to pasture deep inside Pete Collins’s property, and the man would pay the price for his misdeeds—years in prison and the loss of everything he’d worked so hard to build. The discovery was cause enough for celebration. Lottie and the boys had livestock to take to market, plus the stock they needed to rebuild the flock over the coming year. And because Lottie and her sons knew little of the business end of things, Trey helped out there as well. The melding of the Porterfield ranch with that of the Galways was accomplished, and other ranchers and herders paid attention.

Juanita had argued for postponing the party until after the baby arrived. “Nell Porterfield, you seem determined to tempt fate with this child. There are only weeks to go. We can have a party then.”

“But the tradition is to have the party now, in November, before the cowboys scatter for the winter. The tradition is to show appreciation for their hard work, to allow everyone to take a moment to be thankful for a good season.”

Trey looked at Juanita. “We are not going to win this, Nita. What if I put Amanda and Addie in charge instead of Nell?”

Nell had grabbed at the compromise he suggested. “Yes, that’s perfect. And I promise I will stay out of the way and take a nap every afternoon.”

Juanita had given in. Amanda had moved back to the house for the weeks leading up to the party, and Addie came twice a week and stayed over. Everything was going splendidly—invitations had been sent to every cattle and sheep rancher in the area. Several had accepted, although Nell was aware that among the sheepherders, only Lottie had responded. But the telegram announcing Maria’s intent to be there assured a successful day no matter who else chose to stay away.

Nell could hear Amanda chattering on to Juanita. She heard Trey laughing at his sister’s wild ideas for the party, and that was all she needed to decide she would keep her discovery to herself. For the rest of the day, she watched for any more signs, and when there were none, she breathed easier and told herself it was the result of overdoing things, nothing more.

Maria and her family arrived midafternoon, having taken the train to Tucson and come the rest of the way with Amanda’s husband and children. The cousins were loud and lively, and Nell worried that Joshua might feel left out in the boisterous crowd. But her fears were unfounded. Addie’s son, Isaac, took charge and announced that because he and Josh were older, they would take care of “the little ones” as he called them. “Come on, Josh, let’s round up these kids and get them out to the barn,” he said.

Josh grinned, picking up Amanda’s youngest—a girl who had just started to walk—and carrying her outside.

“Well, that’s a relief,” Maria said, facing Nell and smiling. “So you and my baby brother are about to make me an auntie, I see.”

Nell blushed, but she couldn’t help liking this new sister-in-law. Maria was direct, like Addie, but there was a softness to her that Nell found very appealing.

“How are you feeling?” Maria glanced around at the chaos Amanda had created with decorations and such. “I hope this isn’t too much for you.”

“I think it’s wonderful,” Nell assured her. “A house filled with laughter and love—what could be better?”

Later, she overheard Maria talking to Trey. “She reminds me so much of Mama,” she said. Then she poked her brother with her elbow and added, “And the way you look at her reminds me of the way Papa couldn’t take his eyes off Mama, even after all those years.”

Trey blushed. “That’s the plan,” he replied. “Years and years of trying to figure out how I got so lucky.”

Guests started arriving shortly after noon, and soon, the area between the house and the barn was filled with an assortment of wagons and buggies. Although the herders continued to keep their distance from the ranchers, the courtyard resonated with laughter and squeals of recognition as friends who had not seen each other during the long summer season hugged and found a place to sit while they caught up. The kitchen was a hothouse of activity, with Juanita firmly in charge. Where the women gathered to carry out the tasks of giving a party, there seemed to be no room for making a distinction between those who raised sheep and those who herded cattle. Inside the barn, Rico and some of the cowboys provided the music while Jess called the square dances. Even the herders joined in the dancing.

Just before Juanita and her helpers were about to bring out the food, Trey wove his way toward Nell through the clusters of guests. “Come with me. I’ve got a surprise for you.”

Nell had been standing at the edge of the courtyard, tapping her toe in time to the lively music, trying to decide if dancing with Trey would be tempting fate. She so wanted to share a waltz with him. “What kind of surprise?”

“You’ll see. Come on.” He held her hand and led her to the house. Every room glowed with candlelight and kerosene lamps, and because the temperature dropped once the sun set, there was a fire in every fireplace. The front rooms were crowded with guests who all seemed to be talking at once, but Trey bypassed those rooms and instead led her down the corridor that connected the front of the house to the bedrooms—the corridor lined with the portraits he had made of family members.

Maria and Chet, Jess and Addie, and Amanda and Seth stood crowded next to each other at the far end of the hall. They were smiling—even Jess.

“What on earth?” Nell could not imagine what Trey had done.

“Jess, will you do the honors?” Trey asked.

Jess pulled a small hammer from his back pocket and a nail from between his lips and pounded it into the wall.

Then Maria stepped forward holding something covered by a cloth. With Jess’s help, she hung the object on the nail.

Finally, Amanda—wonderful, dramatic Amanda—took hold of a corner of the cloth and pulled it free. “Ta-da!”

Trey urged Nell forward as Addie held high a lantern, illuminating the addition to the gallery—a drawing of Nell. “It’s official, Nell,” Addie said. “Like it or not, you are one of us.”

They all burst into applause, and the women pressed forward to kiss her cheeks.

“Do you like it?” Trey asked shyly.

Nell ran her finger over the portrait. Trey had drawn her seated under a tree near a creek, and the sun was setting, the sky behind her alive with lavender and orange. She wore the dress she had worn the day they were married, the night they had sealed their vows. He had recalled every detail down to the slim silver band she wore on her finger. “I love it,” she whispered, unable to find her voice. “Thank you.” She turned to the others. “Thank all of you. I really don’t know what to say.”

“It’s we who thank you, Nell,” Jess said. He grinned at Trey. “There was a time there when me and Addie thought we might end up having to take care of this guy forever. You’ve done us all a big favor, taking him off our hands.”

“Yeah, Trey,” Amanda added. “We’re relieved you had the good sense to marry a woman with her feet firmly on the ground. Now when you go off thinking how you’re going to change the world, somebody besides us and Nita will be there to set you straight.”

“Look who’s talking,” Trey said. “You were the one driving Mama and Nita loco long before I came of age.”

The bell in the yard clanged, announcing the meal was served.

“Let’s eat,” Jess said as he herded the siblings and their spouses back down the hall, leaving Trey and Nell alone.

Trey stood behind her and wrapped his arms around her as he rested his chin on top of her head. “I’ll do one of Josh and one of the baby this winter. I’ll have the time, but I wanted you to know how much I love you, Nell. And I wanted you to know that my family is now your family. It was their idea to present it to you this way.”

“You made me so beautiful, Trey.”

“I draw what I see, Nellie.”

Outside, the band was playing a waltz, and they swayed slowly to the rhythm of the music. “Come dance with me,” Trey said.

Nell felt a twinge and then a wave of dizziness. Not wanting to alarm Trey, she turned to face him. “I have a better idea,” she said. “Go dance with Nita.”

He grinned. “She won’t do it.”

“Don’t take no for an answer.”

“All right, but I intend to dance with my best girl before this party’s over.”

They returned to the kitchen where Nell sought the fresh air blowing through the open door while Trey invited Juanita to dance.

“Don’t be foolish,” Juanita grumbled.

Trey ignored her protests, humming along with the music as he pulled the housekeeper away from the dishes she was filling and led her out the door. Nita was smiling as she passed Nell and laughing out loud as Trey led her to the center of the courtyard. The other guests stood aside, giving them an open space for the waltz. Everyone was smiling—herder and rancher standing side by side, watching the man who had brought them to this time of peace and cooperation.

And as she watched, Nell felt her stomach cramp and a rush of fluid that three times before had signaled the end of a pregnancy.

* * *

As he and Juanita waltzed, Trey saw what he had wanted for this community: people with their differences celebrating the things they shared in common—family, children, the beauty of the land. And in that moment, Trey had an image of the future—his children living in a community where differences no longer mattered. All were neighbors. He grinned and looked toward the kitchen where he’d left Nell. She was standing as if intending to come to him, but he saw her grip her stomach and then lean heavily against the adobe wall.

“Nellie!” He ran through the crowded courtyard to reach her.

She was sobbing when he caught her in his arms, and he eased her to sit in a straight chair just outside the kitchen. She clung to his hands as he knelt in front of her. “Tell me what’s wrong, Nellie,” he pleaded.

“I…the baby…please…” She was incoherent, but Trey thought he understood.

“Addie!” he bellowed.

All conversation and music stopped.

“Addie, come quick,” he called, his voice catching with fear. “Shhh,” he whispered as he stroked Nell’s face and wiped away her tears. “It’s going to be all right.”

“You can’t know that,” she managed.

“Here’s what I know, Nellie. We—you and me—we’re going to be fine. Whatever life throws at us, we’re going to get through it. Look what we’ve survived already—you especially.”

“But a child—our child,” she whispered. “It’s too soon, too much, Trey. I can’t do this.”

“You can’t do this alone, but you have so many people who love you, Nellie, people who will see us through this, whatever the outcome may be.” He was mouthing the words he thought necessary to calm her, but the truth was that he was terrified. All he had thought about these last weeks as her time came closer was the baby—their child—and all the children that might yet come. He wanted to be a father. More to the point, he wanted to be a family with Nell and Josh—and the baby.

He felt a firm hand on his shoulder and heard his brother say, “Let’s get her inside, Trey.”

“I can walk,” Nell insisted as she grabbed hold of each man’s arm.

“No.” Trey lifted her. When they reached the bedroom, Juanita, Addie, and Maria were already there. The three women bustled around, draping the bed in a canvas sheet, barking out orders to anyone within earshot, and sending the general message that this was not good, even as they tried to soothe Nell.

When Trey laid her on the bed, tears filled his eyes as he brushed her hair away from her cheeks and tried to smile.

“Trey,” Maria said, placing her hand on his shoulder. “You should let us attend to Nell. Go wait with Jess and the others.”

“I’m staying.”

He was aware of the glances that passed among the three women attending his wife, but he was not to be denied. He heard a chair dragged to the head of the bed and Addie’s voice. “Well, at least sit down before you fall down, and stay right here, no matter what happens. Agreed?”

He was about to argue, but Juanita fixed him with the glare she had used on every Porterfield child when she expected an order to be obeyed without question. Trey nodded.

Juanita set a pan of water and a stack of cloths on the bedside table. “May as well make yourself useful,” she grumbled. “Use these to—”

Suddenly, Nell clutched his hand so hard, he thought his fingers might snap. She let out a guttural sound that rose to a high-pitched scream as her body went rigid.

“What’s happening?” Trey demanded, on his feet at once.

“Sit!” All three women chorused the command as they rushed to attend to Nell. Addie climbed onto the bed and knelt so that she was positioned between Nell’s bent legs. Maria stood opposite Trey and gripped Nell’s other hand while Nita dipped a cloth into the cool water, rolled it, and handed it to Trey.

“Let her bite on this when the pain comes,” she said.

“Nita, it’s too soon,” Nell murmured, her voice weak, her face and neck dripping with sweat.

“Many a child has come into this world earlier than planned,” Nita replied, leaning in to brush Nell’s hair off her forehead, “including your husband here.”

The contraction passed, and Nell closed her eyes, trying to steady her breathing. Trey stroked her hand and looked at Addie.

“I expect it’s gonna take some time,” Addie said.

Nell bolted upright, gripped Trey’s fingers, and looked as if she might explode from the pain.

“Do something,” Trey demanded.

“This is the way it goes,” Juanita said. “Now you can either be here or wait out in the hall with the others. Either way, you need to understand you are not in charge here.”

“I’m not going anywhere.” He rinsed a cloth in the water and wiped Nell’s cheeks and forehead. “Shhh,” he whispered. “Rest now.”

“Trey,” she whispered, “I’m so very tired and afraid. What if it’s like before and—”

“That won’t happen.” Trey leaned close. “It’s going to be all right, Nellie. No matter what happens. We’re going to be just fine. Do you hear me?”

He saw tears leak from beneath her closed eyes and wiped them away with his finger. He kissed her temple, smoothed back her hair soaked with sweat, and whispered, “All I will ever need is you, Nell Porterfield.”

Once again, she tightened her grip on his hand and Maria’s and cried out as another contraction built.

“I see the head,” Addie announced. “One big push, Nell. Come on. You can do this.”

Trey saw Nell preparing to endure the pain. He placed the cloth between her teeth as instructed, then held tight to her hand as he kept his focus on Addie.

A moment later, he saw Addie smile. “That’s it, Nell. Push. Head and shoulders are out.”

Nell collapsed back onto the pillows, spent from her efforts, and Addie held a bundle of slime and blood. Trey heard a weak cough and then a mewing cry coming from that bundle.

“Nell, you have a beautiful baby girl,” Addie announced as she cut the cord and laid the child in the blanket Maria held to receive her.

“Just let me get her cleaned up a bit,” Maria said.

Minutes later, Trey and Nell were marveling at their newborn daughter when Nell went rigid once again, and Addie muttered, “Hold on.”

“There’s another one,” Addie said, bending to her work.

Trey felt a wave of dizziness pass through him, even as Nell released a long, keening cry of pain.

“Push, Nell,” Addie instructed. “Come on. Almost there.”

Moments later, Addie held up a second bundle whose cry was a good deal stronger than the first child’s had been. “A girl and a boy,” she announced.

Juanita received their son, and after she and Maria washed the second baby, Nita handed the boy to Trey. “Best hope the children favor their mother,” she teased.

“Are they…” They were so tiny that Trey was afraid to speak the question uppermost in his mind aloud. But how could anything so small survive?

“They are perfect,” Nell whispered, cupping his cheek with her hand as tears of exhaustion and joy ran down her cheeks. “Go find Joshua,” she said. “He needs to meet his sister and brother.”

Reluctantly, Trey did as she asked. As soon as he stepped into the hall, he was surrounded by his family. “It’s twins,” he managed and then felt a loopy grin spread across his face. Jess pounded his back while Amanda leaped up and down, squealing like a ten-year-old. Seth and Chet pumped his hand and congratulated him as he moved toward the front door. Outside, he could see their guests all gathered in the yard, their voices hushed as they waited for news.

“It’s a boy,” Trey announced when he reached the courtyard. The crowd started to cheer, and he raised his hands to silence them. “A boy and a girl!” He chuckled and shook his head, because the truth was, he couldn’t quite believe what had just happened. Somebody tried to hand him a glass of hard cider, but he passed that by on his way to the corral where another guest had told him the children were playing, oblivious to the drama that had played out in the house over the last hour.

When he reached the gate, he saw Joshua demonstrating the rope tricks one of the cowboys had taught him. “Josh,” he called. He motioned for Nell’s son—his son—to come closer. “Come up to the house with me. Got a couple of people you need to meet.”

* * *

The following Sunday, Nell sat in the yard, savoring the cooler days and the sun on her face. Juanita had finally agreed she was recovered enough to leave her bed. “As long as you don’t overdo.” Between Trey and Nita, Nell feared she might never again be allowed to do anything close to her normal routine.

Josh was feeding the chickens while Trey sat nearby. Trey was always nearby these days, ready to spring into action at a moment’s notice should either baby Joe or his sister, Hannah, need anything.

“You know one of these days, you’re going to have to get back to work,” she told him.

“There’s time. Let’s get through Christmas and the New Year.” He rocked the double cradle Eduardo and the cowhands had made for the twins. “Can’t get over how little they are.”

“They don’t stay that way for long,” Nita said as she joined them and pointed to the horizon. “Company coming.”

Three wagons followed by half a dozen men on horseback approached the ranch. Nell felt her heart quicken and instinctively moved closer to her babies.

“Hello!” Reverend Moore drove one of the wagons right up to the house. “Hope this isn’t an inconvenience,” he said when Trey went to greet him and help a group of ladies from the wagon.

“Not at all,” Nell heard her husband reply, but she could see he was as mystified as she was as to why so many people had shown up at once.

Lottie climbed down from the wagon and retrieved a large wicker basket before entering the courtyard with the minister’s wife. Others crowded around to admire the babies, while the men stood a little apart, talking to Trey. That’s when Nell realized that the group included both ranchers and herders, mingling freely as if they were friends.

“Nell?” Mrs. Moore was opening the wicker basket. “Remember when you and I spoke about possibly starting a ladies’ guild, a place where the women of the church might gather to knit using local yarn?”

Nell nodded.

“Well, the night your lovely babies were born, I was talking to your sister-in-law.”

Lottie stepped forward. “That night, the women got talking, and we thought maybe we might make a few things for the twins, just to see how things went.”

Reverend Moore’s wife set the basket on the ground and pulled out booties and blankets and caps—some expertly constructed, others endearing because they were so crudely done. A few pieces had even been dyed with dyes from local plants to make them more colorful. Suddenly, the women were talking over one another, laughing as they told the story of each item.

“That blanket Lottie made for her boys years ago,” a rancher’s wife explained when Nell held one lacy piece, the color of sand, up to her cheek to feel its softness. “She promises that with practice, we’ll all be able to do something so lovely one day, but somehow I doubt we can ever come up to her talent.”

“And here’s a shawl for you, Nell.” A herder’s wife stepped forward and draped the pale-blue wrap around Nell’s shoulders.

“I don’t know what to say. Trey, Nita, come see,” she called.

Trey admired the handiwork, teasing the women about his need for a new winter scarf to wear on the range as he draped Nell’s shawl around his shoulders and struck a pose.

“You look like an old codger,” Nita told him, and everyone laughed. “I’ll get some coffee started,” she said, heading for the house.

“Oh, no, Juanita, stay,” Lottie said. “We brought refreshments for everyone, and we promise not to stay long.”

Trey invited everyone inside. The women exchanged ideas for projects the ladies’ guild might take on, while the men gathered in the library to talk and smoke their pipes and cigars.

Nell observed it all from her rocking chair near the fire, her babies sleeping peacefully in their cradle, apparently undisturbed by the conversation and laughter. She could see Trey standing near the fireplace in the library. He had his arm around Josh’s shoulders, and whatever the men were discussing made his eyes shine with interest.

After an hour had passed, Reverend Moore led the men across the hall to join the ladies. “Could we have a word of prayer before we head back?”

Everyone bowed his or her head as the minister thanked God for the many blessings the community had received over the last weeks. He asked for a special blessing for the babies and for Nell, Trey, and Joshua. “Amen.”

The word was repeated by every person in the room. Once again, there was an explosion of chatter and pleas from the men to get going before dark set in as the women insisted on clearing away the remains of their refreshments and having one more look at “those sweet babies.”

“I’m going down to the bunkhouse to stay the night, if that’s okay,” Josh announced.

“See to your chores first, Josh,” Trey instructed.

“Yes, sir.” Josh grabbed his hat and took off at a run.

Trey sat on the footstool next to Nell’s chair. “You must be exhausted, Nellie. Why don’t I have Nita fix us some tea and a bowl of soup while you get ready for bed.”

Nell smiled and brushed his hair away from his forehead. “It’s not even five o’clock, Trey, and I have to feed your children.”

Trey frowned. “How long before they eat on their own…I mean before they don’t need you to…”

The darling man was blushing, and Nell loved that on the one hand, he was shy with her, while on the other, he could barely let an hour pass without touching her cheek or letting his hands linger on her shoulders, his desire written clearly in the furrows of his brow.

“It’ll be a while.” She opened the front of her dress and camisole before lifting little Joe to her breast.

When Hannah squirmed and protested, Trey picked her up and paced the length of the room and back. “Now, just stop your fussing, Hannah,” he told her as he rocked her in his arms. “You’ll have your turn.”

Later after they had gotten the babies settled and retired for the night, Nell heard Trey rise and pull on his trousers and boots. His habit of visiting Javier’s grave each night had worried her at first, but now she understood his need to share his life with his friend. What surprised her was when she saw him pick up one of the babies before leaving.

Mystified, she rose, put on her robe and slippers, wrapped herself and Joe in the shawl the women had brought, and followed Trey.

He was standing inside the fenced cemetery and had positioned himself so that he was standing in a circle made up of the markers of his parents and Javier. He had wrapped the baby in his jacket.

“Trey?” She walked toward him.

He smiled sheepishly. “Didn’t mean to wake you, Nellie. Just thought Javier and my folks might want to know how things have turned out.”

Nell watched him holding their daughter and realized he had kept his promise to his friend—and to her. For their children, there would be no “us” versus “them.” For their children, it would be one world where neighbors worked together to face the challenges and celebrate the joys for generations to come.

Nell rested her head on her husband’s broad shoulder.

“We should go in,” he said. “You’re cold. I’ll make you some warm cinnamon milk—it will help you sleep.”

“Nita left a pot warming on the stove before she went to bed.”

Trey laughed as he wrapped his free arm around his wife and they walked together back to the house. “I really thought once these babies were born, she’d turn to mothering them. I doubt that woman will ever see me as anything other than that sickly boy she fussed over for so many years.”

“And you love it,” Nell teased.

Trey ducked his head and grinned. “Yeah, I do.” Then he stopped walking and turned to face her, his expression sober. “Nellie, we did it. There’s work to come, but I want you to know, without you and Lottie and Juanita… Well, men are stubborn, and we’re taught from early on that we need to win, but you ladies—”

“We did it together, Trey. Everyone did their part—eventually.”

He placed his finger under her chin and lifted her face to meet his kiss. “I love you, Nellie Porterfield.”

Nell ran her finger along the outline of his jaw. “And you, Trey Porterfield, are my beloved.”

Later, as they lay in bed together, the twins asleep in their cradle and a full moon casting its light on the portrait of Trey’s parents that hung over the fireplace, Nell stared at Constance and Isaac Porterfield. And as she drifted off to sleep, for the first time, she felt worthy of her place in this house, this room. This perfect life.