Holding You
GRABBING ONTO THE bed, I listened to Jessie talking about Lauren. The hospital in College Station had transferred Lauren to Brackenridge once they diagnosed her with bacterial meningitis. Lauren’s condition had only gotten worse.
Coma? Shaking my head, I whispered, “No.”
Sniffling, Jessie placed her hands on my arms and forced me to look at her. “Colt, the bacterial meningitis is . . . it’s not good. They can’t control the fever and her temperature is so . . . it’s so high and her body could put itself in a coma, so I need you to prepare for . . .”
Taking a step away, I shook my head as I felt my entire body start shaking. “No. No, she’s not leaving me. She is not leaving me.” Turning back to look at the love of my life, I whispered, “Lauren would never leave me.” Glancing back to Jessie, my heart dropped.
Tears streamed down Jessie’s face as the door opened and my mother walked in. Jessie turned and whispered, “Ellie—”
Giving me a weak smile, my mother moved closer to me. “Colt, honey let’s step outside for some fresh air.”
Shaking my head, I stood firm. I was not leaving Lauren. “She’s not . . . she’s going to be okay. She wouldn’t leave me, Mom. She knows how much I love her and need her.” Turning to Lauren, I walked up to her and took her hand again. Kissing the back of it, I felt my tears begin to fall freely. “Please, baby. Please don’t do this to me. Lauren, I beg you!”
Jessie quickly left the room as I buried my face down into Lauren’s neck. Her skin felt so hot. So incredibly hot. “Lauren, please wake up. Don’t leave me, sweetheart. I’m nothing without you, Lauren. Please wake up.”
A woman began talking. “Sir, we need to put the icepacks on her stat.”
Strong hands took a hold of my shoulders and pulled me away from Lauren. No. I can’t leave her. Turning, I saw my father. “Dad, no I can’t leave her. She needs to know I’m here. She needs to know I won’t leave her side.”
“Colt, you need to get some food and some sleep.”
Pushing him away, my father stumbled against a chair. “I’m not leaving her!” I shouted as my mother jumped. Covering her mouth, she began crying.
“Gunner,” she whispered as my father took another step toward me. “Colt. Listen to me, son, I know how much you want to be here, but you need something to eat.”
Warmth trickled down my cheeks as I felt my tears. “Dad, I can’t lose her. She’s my everything. The very reason I breathe.”
Tears formed in my father’s eyes. “Son, I’m only asking for two hours. Please.”
Wiping the tears from my face, I slowly walked into my father’s arms. “Dad, please tell me she’s going to be okay.”
Two nurses walked into the room as one cleared her throat. “I’m sorry, we can only have two people in here at a time.”
Turning, I nodded my head. “What about her fever?” I asked.
The younger nurse gave me a weak smile. “We’re going to be doing something called ice packing. We will place icepacks in key locations to bring her body temperature down, but we need to do it now.”
Guiding me out of the room, my father said, “Your mother will be with her while we go get you something to eat.”
Stopping in front of my mom, I attempted to talk but my voice kept cracking. “Mom . . . please . . . please don’t leave her.”
Shaking her head, she placed her hand on the side of my face. “I promise I won’t leave her side.”
My legs felt like rubber as my father guided me out of the room and to the waiting room. Looking up, I saw all of our friends sitting there. Grace jumped up and ran over to me and slammed her body into mine. “Colt,” she whispered as she held me tight. My eyes moved across the room to see Maegan and Taylor with their parents, Brad and Amanda. Libby and Luke were now standing and I asked, “Where is Mireya?”
Libby wiped her tears away. “My parents have her back in Mason.”
Grace pulled away and gave me a smile. “She’s a fighter, Colt.” Nodding my head, it felt as if someone was squeezing my heart.
When my eyes landed on Alex, I felt myself lose control as I started to cry. Alex quickly got up and walked over to me. Pulling her into my arms, I let it all go. The last two days had been hell as Lauren continued to decline. “Alex, she won’t wake up. She won’t wake up for me.”
“Shh, she’s going to, Colt. She’s strong and she loves you so much.”
Holding Alex as tight as I could, I tried to imagine my life without Lauren and I couldn’t. I needed her.