Chapter Twelve
Tugging the hood of her cape up over her head, Rachel rushed away from the church before anyone noticed her leaving. She’d told her mother her allergies must have returned, a perfect excuse for her red-rimmed eyes through Kiersten and Luke’s wedding.
Snow fell in tiny flakes, the kind of precipitation that usually led off a major storm. Big, fat flakes were decorative gifts from the sky. The tiny ones meant business, even if right now they looked like tiny bits of glitter falling all around her as she headed toward the Hearthside Inn where the reception would be. She’d parked there anyhow, so even if she skipped the remaining festivities, she would need to meet her mom there to drive her home.
A man’s voice from behind her stopped her in her tracks.
“You’re going to ruin your shoes,” he observed from a few feet away.
Gavin.
Her heart did a few hopeful acrobatics before sinking again. He had even told Luke that he’d needed to think about trouble they were having.
She resented falling asleep the night before, thinking things were wonderful between them, only to find out Gavin had been restless with unease all night long.
Glancing over her shoulder briefly, she turned forward again and kept walking. He was far too appealing to contemplate for long. She’d end up confessing more tender feelings for him that she could not afford to have. “I didn’t like these heels anyhow.” She walked faster. “Too tall. Too fussy.”
She could hear him pick up his pace, his steps crunching in the snow. He was beside her in an instant—all too tempting.
“It’s slippery.” He offered his arm. “Hold on to me.”
It sounded simple enough. But if she touched him now, she might not be able to let go. “It will be faster if I don’t.” She hugged her lined cape tighter around herself, tipping her head down into the wind that was picking up. “Shouldn’t you be in the receiving line?”
“I went to extraordinary lengths to make it to the wedding at all. I figured I checked the best man box well enough.” He touched her elbow lightly, steadying her as she stepped off the curb to cross a side street.
She glanced down at his arm, seeing the white splint peeking out from his suit sleeve. Something must have happened on the mountain.
“You’re hurt.” A pang of concern for him overrode everything else. Not just for his injury, but for the career that meant so much to him. “Are you all right? Can you still race?”
“It’s a mild sprain. The splint is just a precaution, and it won’t keep me from racing.” He moved closer to her. “Right now, my biggest concern is talking to you.”
Relieved he was okay, she was able to focus on his words. Remember how much his actions this morning still stung.
“That’s funny.” She stopped in the middle of the street to face him, holding back tears by sheer force of will. “Because you actually had unlimited opportunities to do just that last night and this morning, but you chose not to.”
“I know.” He raked his fingers through his hair. He looked incredibly handsome in his gray tuxedo. The formal bow tie was a deep crimson. A rose boutonniere shivered in the chilly wind. “But I couldn’t think my way around what I should say until I had a chance to clear my head.”
A car behind her honked. She wouldn’t have even thought to move if Gavin hadn’t taken her arm then, and drawn her safely to the other side of the street where the Hearthside Inn sat on a hill overlooking Lake Placid. Even here, outside Yuletide, the streets were full of holiday décor now that Christmas was just a week away. A band of carolers dressed in bright green and red sang “O Tannenbaum,” their steps matched in a kind of sprightly march.
“Because I pose some kind of trouble for you?” She remembered how it had felt to have Luke read the text aloud in the bridal parlor. “Some inconvenience? Despite my supposed reconciliation with the groom, he and his parents accused me of wrecking the wedding before you arrived. Apparently, it was my fault you were late.”
His expression clouded. “I’ll make it clear to everyone that I was solely to blame for that.” He held a side door to the inn open for her and she slipped inside, stamping the snow off her shoes. “Besides, keep in mind the Harris family—Luke’s parents in particular—might have their own reasons for wanting to alienate you.”
“I had the same thought, actually.” And if Luke’s parents had been somehow involved in her father’s disappearance—if they’d pressured him to leave somehow, or threatened him in some way—it couldn’t have been easy for Luke to open up the family to police scrutiny again. He might be under more pressure than anyone knew. “And you don’t need to intervene on my behalf. You’ve done enough for me this week.”
She tugged a tissue from her pocket and bent to swipe off some of the snow on her toe. The shoes were ruined for sure. The burgundy velvet matched her dress perfectly. Or rather it had until the color blotched from the moisture.
“No I haven’t. I spent half the week worrying about what a relationship might do for a business I haven’t even started. And then I couldn’t even be there for you today after spending days convincing you go to the wedding with me.” His brow furrowed, his eyes darkening.
“I’m glad you’re okay. We were all worried about you.” She’d been terrified, in fact. “I was surprised you didn’t answer Luke’s calls, if not mine.”
She shed her coat and didn’t know where else to put it so she laid it over her arm. Gavin took it from her, settling it over his own. Restless and edgy, she wished they could keep walking. At least that had been an outlet for how upset she was. And it beat crying.
So she kept walking, heading down a corridor of ground-floor suites. Each door was decorated with a willow branch wreath and a red ribbon.
“I would have answered your call, hell, I would have called you, but I dropped my phone when I fell and it shattered into about twenty pieces.” He slid a protective hand on her back once when a group of skiers stalked past, their equipment taking up half the hall.
“How bad was this fall?” Everything in her went still again. “Did you hurt anything else?” She bit her lip, not sure how much to say.
Not sure how much to show she cared when she’d already revealed her feelings to him. From what she understood, her outpouring of love had been what sent him running in the first place.
“It wasn’t bad. I’m lucky to have injured just my wrist. I lost concentration for a second.” He shook his head like he still didn’t understand what had happened. But then, he seemed to regain a sense of purpose as he took her hand and tugged her into the small—empty—hotel library full of antique furniture and books.
A small, spindly Christmas tree stood on one end of the room, decorated solely with red cardinals and pine cones. On the opposite end of the room, a blaze burned brightly in a huge stone fireplace that took up most of one wall. A swag of pine garland covered the mantel, bright bows at regular intervals. Rachel felt warmer already as she gravitated toward the fire, hands extended to savor the lick of heat on her fingertips.
“Anyhow,” Gavin continued, setting her cape on the arm of a stuffed leather chair before joining her in front of the hearth. “I had my wrist wrapped at one of the ski stations, but I thought I’d better get a quick X-ray or MRI to see if I broke or tore anything. By the time I realized how close I was cutting it to make the wedding, I forgot that my pickup had been running on fumes the past few days.”
“You ran out of gas?” She didn’t know why that made her laugh a little. A release maybe, since his day could have been so much worse.
Hers could have too, she realized. Because instead of getting on a plane to Austria without saying goodbye, Gavin had chased her down to talk to her here. Alone.
“I couldn’t believe it either.” Gavin shook his head, a sheepish grin spreading. “But fueling up the vehicle was a low priority this week, Rachel.” He reached to take her hands, enveloping them in his. His splint went between his thumb and forefinger, but didn’t impede the rest of his hand. “Ever since I saw you in town, you’re all I’ve thought about.”
She stared up into his green eyes, wondering what he was thinking. Why he’d followed her. Why he’d needed to leave her so urgently this morning.
“I don’t understand.” She shook her head, taking a step back. She ducked her chin, unwilling to look in his eyes and wish for things that weren’t meant to be.
He came with her, still holding her fingers captive.
“I didn’t understand either. Until this morning.” He tipped his head sideways to meet her gaze, then let go of her hands to lift her chin. “Rachel, I’m crazy about you. I want you in my life all the time, but it seemed like an impossible dream when you’re so determined to leave Yuletide and I want a whole life here.”
The revelation was so unexpected and so wholly welcome, she felt too stunned to speak. She wanted to ask him to repeat himself, for fear she’d misunderstood.
I’m crazy about you, he’d said. She couldn’t misinterpret that. Her heat rate quickened.
“I’m not that determined to leave anymore,” she admitted, hoping upon hope that it would make him rethink his view of her. “There have been a lot of nice things about coming home.”
His hand fell away from her chin, but he cupped her shoulders, the warmth of his palms sending ribbons of pleasure tickling along her skin.
“I could tell you were changing your mind about Yuletide. And that felt amazing to me.” His voice held a sincerity that drew her in, made her want to believe there was still a chance for them. “Except that I’m not retired yet, and how fair is it of me to ask you to wait around until I’m done snowboarding? Or—the other option—how fair would it be to ask you to travel around with me while I chase a dream?”
He’d been thinking about that? Mulling over a future that involved her? She warned her heart not to get ahead of her after the way things fell apart between them this morning, but her pulse fluttered anyhow. “I don’t know. But you could ask me what I think about those things.”
“I want to.” His touch skimmed down her arms and back up, rubbing gently. “I hope I still have that chance. But last night, I kept thinking about how I wanted to give you the world and I’m not in a position to offer you anything close. The Jingle Elf house isn’t even—” He shook his head. “You’ve seen it. It’s a mess.”
This was what sent him off to the mountain? The logistics of a relationship? He’d been injured because he hadn’t been concentrating enough, distracted by externals that didn’t matter to her. Frustrated, she wanted to ask him what he thought about her. About them. But this conversation had an element of promise that she hadn’t dared to hope for.
Outside the library, a room service cart rushed past, a tray of empty glasses clinking. Her emotions clattered around too, trying to figure out how she felt in light of his revelation that he’d been thinking about a future. This was a positive step and it soothed the ache that had been in her chest ever since finding his note in the bathroom mirror.
“I don’t need you to hand me the world, Gavin.” She combed her fingers through his thick hair, braved a step closer to him. “If you want to be with me, I’d rather build the world with you. Together.”
“You make it sound nice. Easy.” He kissed her palm when it got close to his cheek. “How do you do that? Answer the problems that keep me up at night?”
She couldn’t hold back a smile. It felt like it came from her toes—a bright, joyous acknowledgment that she hadn’t been wrong. There really was something special, something tremendous happening between her and this kind-hearted, generous, incredible man.
“I don’t know how I do it. But will you try and answer a question of mine?”
His expression turned serious. “I’d give a whole lot to be the guy who fixes things for you.”
She had the feeling that was one of the more romantic things he’d said to a woman, and she savored it for what it was. Proof that he cared. Proof he wanted something more with her.
Her heart glowed with new hope, brighter than the crackling blaze that warmed her skin.
“Setting aside the hows of being together for a minute, can you tell me what you feel about me? About us?” She’d risked her heart the night before, but it occurred to her now that once wasn’t enough when you loved someone.
She would have to keep risking it. Keep taking chances. Eight years ago, she’d been wild about Gavin, but a bump in the road had been enough to send her running. That wasn’t love, and it wasn’t a relationship that would last. She wouldn’t scare off so easily this time.
Gavin cradled her face in his hands, using his fingers lightly with one wrist in a splint. His gaze locked on hers.
“Yes, I can tell you. I knew the answer to that one last night before I ever even closed my eyes.” He stroked her cheeks with his thumbs. “I’m falling in love with you, Rachel. And it’s a fast free fall that’s still happening, a long drop into something that’s going to be really, really wonderful.”
Her heart squeezed tight around those beautiful words. Had she thought he wasn’t ready to articulate his emotions? How very wrong she’d been.
“Oh.” The sound that leaped from her lips wasn’t an answer, just a yelp of happy surprise. “I didn’t know. I was afraid—”
“I’m sorry I wasn’t there with you this morning when you woke up.” He slid one hand around the base of her neck, the other landed on the small of her back, stroking sweetly. “I regret that more than I can say. But at the time, I was so overwhelmed because I didn’t expect anything like that to happen and I didn’t know my next move.”
His thumbs returned to her cheeks and she realized he wiped away tears. They were the beautiful kind though. The sort of tears that came when your feelings were so big and bright.
“You didn’t need a move.” She shook her head, her voice a thin rasp because of the lump in her throat. “You only needed to tell me that you cared.”
His shoulders sagged, relief evident in his eyes. Seeing how important that was to him, how much he’d worried about having a plan for them, touched her deeply.
“This is all new for me, Rachel, so I’m going to get it wrong sometimes. I’ve never trusted a soul with what I gave you.” Leaning in, he kissed her cheeks, tasting the last of her tears. “My whole heart.”
Tenderness welled up inside her, and she flung her arms around him, squeezing him tight. Holding on to him as well as dreams of their future together.
“I’m going to take the best care of it,” she whispered in his ear as he buried his face in her neck. “You have mine, too.”
Lifting his head again, his eyes were a shade greener, a happiness radiating from him as he smiled.
“This is going to be the best Christmas ever.” He rained kisses along her face. “No matter where we spend it.”
“We’ll figure it all out.” She wasn’t worried about the future. She had a job she could do anywhere in the world as long as she could find a sewing machine. “But right now, I think we owe it to the bride and groom to put in an appearance at the reception.”
“You realize what I want most is to steal you away and kiss you until it’s time to catch that flight to Austria?”
A thrill shot through her at the idea.
“How long will you stay there?” she asked, thinking they could at least work out a plan for the next month or two. “I want to be with you for Christmas.”
“The meet ends in two days. I missed most of it this week.” He brushed her hair away from her eyes and she smoothed his tie. “I’ll be back to give you the happiest holiday you can imagine.”
Noise from the reception—a deejay welcoming guests—sounded a few rooms away, a call to join the party.
“Hmm.” She tipped her head to his shoulder as they walked slowly toward the doors, heading toward the reception. “I can be very imaginative. Are you sure you want to make wild promises like that?”
“When it comes to Christmas, I’m sort of an expert after growing up in this crazy, holiday-themed town.”
“Really?” She threaded her fingers through his on his good hand. “It sounds like the perfect childhood,” she teased.
“It was definitely fun.” He squeezed her hand and picked it up to kiss the backs of her knuckles. “But it wasn’t until I met a beautiful girl who could sing like an angel that things really started to get interesting.”
She could listen to him talk for days on end. Years, even. His voice made her smile and her toes curl. Struck by how very much love she felt for him, she paused in the hotel lobby, just outside the wedding reception already filled with guests. There were friends and family who would embrace them warmly, despite the rocky start to the day. No matter what her parents might have done, Emma Harris was an ally.
In his own way, she guessed, Luke would be too. And if Scott Malek could be believed, he was trying to move Yuletide toward positive change. New revenue streams to fix the carousel. A more altruistic spirit of good works and holiday spirit. Rachel thought maybe she could help make sure that happened. Make sure her father’s good intentions overshadowed his later mistakes. She wasn’t going to let an obstacle or two stand in her way.
Inside, champagne corks popped and bursts of laughter punctuated a hundred different conversations all going on at once.
“This is just the beginning for us,” she told Gavin, looking forward to making him happy. “It’s all going to get better from here.”
“Then let’s start our story the right way.” He turned her to face him and pointed overhead.
“Mistletoe.” Anticipation fired through her. Happiness made her feel light enough to float.
“You’re sure you’re not allergic?” He lowered his voice for her ears only.
She didn’t bother answering. Instead, she took advantage of the mistletoe overhead and rose up on her toes, pressing her lips to his.