Chapter 9
Nox didn’t know how to handle this.
Maeve was brave, full of piss and vinegar, but she’d been reduced to tears. She looked smaller, more vulnerable, and he had the urge to protect her. Defend her.
Nox couldn’t stand it. Her pain and fear twisted his insides into little knots. He wanted to fix this for her, but he didn’t know how.
“Tell me more about your sister. Anything. Your choice.”
“I thought you were going to spank me.”
The truth was, he longed to spank her. Nox didn’t have a problem doling out consequences for bratty behavior. He’d do it every damn day if Maeve liked. Twice on Sundays. She had a delicious ass, and he loved getting his hands on it.
It was an intimate act, a show of trust. And he knew it would make her feel better, but she needed to reach catharsis, find an emotional release first.
“I will, but not yet. Now, tell me.” Nox wouldn’t take “no” for an answer. She had to deal with the grief, let it out, and acknowledge the pain.
Maeve took in a shuddering breath. “When I was eighteen and Amy was six, my dad left for the weekend. He was screwing this college girl, and they’d run off together on this romantic trip. Anyway, we were between nannies at the moment, because Reggie kept sleeping with them too.”
“Go on.” He had no idea where this was going, but he wanted to keep her talking.
“It was just the two of us, and I let her watch a scary movie.”
“Yeah? Which one?”
“Scream.” Maeve stood, pacing as she spoke. “I didn’t even think about it. The movie was way too frightening for Amy, but I wanted to watch it. Anyway, after it was over, Amy was so scared, she couldn’t sleep. Amy was convinced the ghost face killer guy was in her closet, so I let her stay with me.”
Nox smiled, picturing the two little girls huddled together, protecting one another. He’d never had a sibling, or any family, other than his grandad. He hadn’t felt a sense of belonging until he’d joined the military, but the work he did had also hardened his heart.
What if I’m lonely?
The thought came out of nowhere, unbidden. And he quickly pushed it down, refused to think about it.
“Did you comfort her?”
“Yeah.” She chuckled. “We pulled the covers over our heads to hide, and I let her hold a flashlight. We stayed awake together all-night long.” Maeve smiled softly. “We didn’t go to sleep until the next morning.”
“So, you loved Amy, protected her.” Nox wanted Maeve to understand this wasn’t her fault. He wanted to ease her guilt.
“Yeah, but…” Her voice wavered.
“What?”
“That night, Amy asked me if she could call me ‘mom’ and I wouldn’t let her. I guess I’m my father’s daughter. I didn’t want the responsibility. Amy needed me, but I wasn’t there for her.”
“Come here.” Nox opened his arms, and she collapsed against his chest, wetting his neck with tears. He held her as she cried. Nox rubbed her back, talking nonsense to her, as he soothed Maeve, tried to calm her down.
Nox didn’t offer comforting, meaningless platitudes though. And he refused to make empty promises.
Nox couldn’t predict the outcome of this situation. He knew one thing for sure though. He’d do whatever it took to get her sister back. And if he couldn’t recover Amy, Nox would line up the bodies of the men who’d taken her. She would be avenged.
“Do you think she’s alive?” Maeve asked, after she’d calmed down.
“Yes.”
She pulled back to stare at him. “Don’t tell me what I want to hear. You’ve had a lot of experience in the field, and I want your best educated guess. Is she alive? Or dead?” Maeve wiped the tears away with the back of her hand. “Either way, I need to know. Not knowing what to expect is killing me.”
Nox feared Amy was dead. It was his best guess, but Maeve seemed fragile.
“Like I said earlier, you’re strong, Maeve, you can get through this.”
She gulped. “You think she’s gone.”
“I honestly don’t know, but I want you to prepare yourself for anything.”
When his grandfather died, he hadn’t been ready. Nox had been caught unaware, and it made the loss even more devastating. In retrospect, he should’ve anticipated the old man’s death. His granddad had been in poor health for years. He supposed no one was ever truly ready to say goodbye to a loved one.
“I feel like I’m coming unglued and I don’t think I can stand this anymore.”
“You’re tougher than you think.”
Maeve sighed. “You sound so confident, that I want to believe you.” She shut her eyes, collecting her thoughts for a moment, and then blew out a shaky breath. “Are you ever gonna spank me?”
“Are you sure, sex is what you want right now?” He’d never taken advantage of a woman in his life. She seemed on edge, a little crazy, and he didn’t want to push her. She’d already been through a lot already.
“I want, no, I need you to punish me. I feel guilty. I don’t want sex, I want to be disciplined.”
“And I’ve already told you, you’ve done nothing wrong.”
“Please Nox? You asked me what I needed earlier, and this is it.”
“So, if I were to spank you, you’d feel better.”
“Yes. Exactly.” She bit her lip. “Is it weird?”
“I don’t give a fuck about whether or not it’s strange. I already told you I’m over what other people think of me. They can go fuck themselves for all I care.” He’d never fit in anywhere, and Nox had stopped trying a long time ago.
“I wish I could be more like you.”
“No, you really don’t.” He hadn’t gotten here without being broken. Damaged. “Take off everything but your panties.” Nox positioned himself on the edge of the bed.
Maeve wore a silk blouse over a black tank top, with a matching skirt. obediently undressed down to her drawers, and Nox patted his lap.
“Lay down.”
She got across his lap without a second thought, trusting him utterly. Once again, he was humbled by her submission.
Nox rubbed her thighs. She wore this cheeky red lace underwear. She had the sweetest ass, all pale perfection. He lifted her legs, kissing Maeve’s feet. They were dainty with polished toenails.
His fingertips roamed all over her—the length of her thighs, the tight calves, the slender ankles. And then he cupped her sex through the fabric. As he predicted, her pussy was wet, weeping for him. Nox contemplated giving Maeve an orgasm, like this, while she was balanced on his knees.
No, not yet.
Nox swatted her cheeks, back and forth. Nox adored the sound, the reverberation. He could spank her luscious little ass all day.
After she was warmed up, Nox slapped Maeve harder, and she shook in response.
Her breath came in pants. “Don’t hold back with me.”
“Are you tryin’ to top me from the bottom?”
Some “submissives” were really in control the entire time, demanding a dominant spank them, fuck them, let them come. Nox didn’t mind obliging a lady, if he was in the right mood, but she’d asked him for punishment.
And that’s exactly what she’d get.
“No.”
“I didn’t think so.”
And then he struck her butt cheeks, really going to town on them, making the tender flesh turn red. She twisted, rubbing her legs together. Nox pulled the edges of the panties up, giving her a wedgie, exposing even more of her rounded ass.
She squirmed, and Maeve rubbed herself against his leg. He knew it was instinctual, a desire she couldn’t repress, not in this state. Submission stripped away layers of artifice, and barriers a person threw up to protect themselves. In many ways, Maeve was her most authentic self when she submitted to him.
“And I didn’t say you could get off.”
“I’m sorry.”
“I thought so.” He adjusted her position, so Maeve couldn’t graze her clit against his thigh. And then he peeled her panties down but didn’t take them off. He loved the way she looked half-dressed. Somehow, it made her look even more naked and vulnerable.
Then, he continued correcting her as before.
She wriggled as he spanked her. In between slaps, he massaged her, giving her a chance to relax, anticipate the next smack. The skin was hot under his palms, as though she’d been laying out in the sun.
Nox was relentless, following a hectic pace. He grasped her hair, wrapped it around his fist, and held her in place. And then he found the darkness within, the beast inside himself.
It howled. Maeve was his. His slut. His for the taking. Couldn’t she see it?
What Nox really wanted was someone who belonged to him. Someone who would never ever leave him. And the need shamed him. It was pathetic, a leftover longing from the unwanted boy he’d once been.
Nox shook his head, scattering the thoughts.
His next swats were ruthless, a barrage which broke her down, driving Maeve into subspace where she belonged.
He wanted her mindless, helpless. His.
And Maeve utterly surrendered to him, lost herself to his ruthless desire and writhed under his control, half-heartedly trying to escape his hands, but there was nowhere for Maeve to go.
She trembled. Tears leaked from her eyes and both sets of cheeks were flushed. She’d never looked so goddamn beautiful. He pushed the panties down and reached around to explore her dripping cunt.
Maeve whimpered, rubbing against his hand.
Nox knew how she felt. He’d never been this hard, like iron, pressing against his fly. His cock was trying to rip its way through the denim to get to her.
He thumbed her swollen clit, pushed her to the brink of orgasm and kept Maeve on edge, teasing her until she howled in want. This was supposed to be about punishment, but he intended to give her pleasure, a release.
Eventually.
Nox pushed her from his lap and put his cock in her mouth, instead. He held her head over his lap.
“Slowly suck it.” He cupped the back of her head, pushing his dick into her mouth. She licked and lapped his cock, taking it deep into her mouth and loving him.
And then Nox reached over and smacked her ass.
She squealed.
Nox fucked her mouth then. He thrust all the way down her throat. She relaxed it, taking every last inch of him. Nox gripped her hair, pushing Maeve’s head up and down.
When he couldn’t take anymore, Nox pulled out and then he was kneading her breasts and tweaking the nipples, and penetrating her dripping pussy with his thick fingers, seeking the tiny nub of her clit once more.
She tried twisting away, but he held Maeve still. “I don’t deserve an orgasm.”
“Too damn bad, you’re gonna come anyway. Because I say so.”
Nox clutched her ankle, holding her legs apart, pushing his fingers into her.
“No.” Maeve struggled, but he held her fast.
“If you want me to stop, use your safe word.”
She didn’t.
But fingering her wasn’t enough. He pulled her into a standing position and she stumbled into him. Nox plundered her mouth, once more, drunk on the taste of her.
When he couldn’t stand anymore, he yanked her back against the wall. He was going to jam her full of cock.
Maeve wrapped her arms around him and stood on her tiptoes to kiss his mouth. He grabbed her ass, squeezing it and she whimpered. Maeve wrapped her legs around his waist. He kissed her hungrily, desperately, needing to get closer, needing more of her.
Maeve arched, keening as she came for him.
It didn’t take him long to get there, too.
His orgasm was blinding in its intensity, draining his balls entirely. Nox roared with satisfaction. When he pulled back, her thighs were speckled with semen, as though he’d marked Maeve in some primitive way.
In an instant, the savagery, the need to control and possess was gone, replaced by a profound protectiveness, a longing to keep her safe.
He kissed Maeve on the forehead, the nose, and then her mouth. Her face was wet with tears, and she had trouble keeping her eyes open.
Nox carried her back to the bed and laid Maeve on her stomach. He cleaned her with a washcloth and placed a plastic bag full of ice cubes on her bottom to bring the swelling down.
By the time he finished tending to her, Maeve had already drifted off. Sometimes, the release was so profound, subs passed out. In the morning, she’d be swollen and pink, and it might be painful to sit, but he hadn’t done any lasting harm.
Nox was amazed by the trust she’d thrown him, how she’d given herself to him.
It scared him, thrilled him, and he wanted more. Much more.
Nox had a terrible feeling, he’d never get his fill of Maeve. He laid beside her, wrapping his body around hers, pushing his face into her hair, holding onto Maeve for dear life.
For the first time in years, he was terrified. Nox was beginning to think he wouldn’t be able to give her up.
Nox made a point of being a lone wolf, self-sufficient. Even though he worked with a team, he hadn’t let any of them in. And women? He always kept them at arm’s length.
But Maeve was different than the ones he’d fucked and forgotten.
Like him, she was aloof, indifferent, and yet he sensed her softer side. When she writhed under his hands, he glimpsed the loneliness in her eyes, her need for him.
Neither one of them would admit to it.
Maeve mattered.
Although, he wasn’t sure how she’d gotten under his skin. Or what to do about it. Pushing her away wasn’t an option, and neither was letting her in.
What if he needed her, but she wasn’t there anymore? Like his grandad. Losing him had been devastating. Nox wouldn’t survive another loss.
I’m well and truly fucked on this one.